A safe place for anxiety sufferers to share.

Thoughts_Arrive

I've already blown it, not going to blow it with more people.

lastexitlondon

Mate  hold tight  you are good. Lets leave it there.  It can only do harm  .  We know you and we are all saying the same . We care about everyone here.  We are some of the best people around and love is so important.  

Thoughts_Arrive

I've already done harm. 

lastexitlondon

No . Stop now . Its over. Its a non subject here. Please we all accept eachother and  i for one am acting like a caged animal here.  These times are beyond testing. 

Thoughts_Arrive

Sorry.

lastexitlondon

Just some perspective.  We are shut in a flat . 4 of us. My mum is stuck indoors round the  corner 
 We can't  visit. My son with asthma and other 2 daughters  are stuck indoors whilst their mum has no choice but to work and risk catching it.  
Our 2 year old is like a tornado  wanting to do and go everywhere. Cant.

Thoughts_Arrive

Sorry to hear. I hope it improves soon.

Matts3221

Rob:

            I am very sorry try to keep your nerves together and I know that is hard to say I personally feel like I am falling apart right now. If I could be home quarantine  I would feel better than being at work interacting with the public.

            Please note that is not saying you don't have reason to worry , I think right now everyone is worried for the most part and those of us with high anxiety issues just make this 100 times worst. I felt like I was going to throw up this  morning before coming in to work because I just did not want to go. I am not even in the category of high risk ( 41 , no pre existing health except for Kidney Stones but I think that does not count , Side note if it does please don't post it here I don't need to fall apart anymore )

              Glad to hear you are still going outside just to get some fresh air , it will help greatly. I love you all , I realize and Rob maybe for yourself as well all this worry is bound to get us sick ( not with covid-19 , but just a normal cold or flu ) the constant worry is going to compromise our immune system.

               Love to everyone , no negative shit on here please , I need this board more now then ever ,  I would ask anyone that goes negative for us just not to respond , I do not mean this in crule way but we have to stay above this all. We will be ok , we will get thru this.

hedonist

Monday, fresh start. Let’s let these perceived diagnoses go, along with the anger and harping on it. 

Fair?

hedonist

And Matts, YOU hang in there too. 

lastexitlondon

Matts3221

hedonist said:

And Matts, YOU hang in there too. 

Thank you , trying , just having a hard time today , also what a day to forget to take my anti anxity meds so that is not the best. Also as the boss I feel I have to hold it together for my employees. Little do they know I am posing on here about my fears.

My honest feelings right now is I just want to hide under my fucking bed like a child because I don't know what else to do. Part of me is dissapointmented in myself for feeling this way. I try to pump others up or let them know it will be ok and I feel like a hypocrite right now.

I guess not knowing what daily life is going to be like because everything seems to be changing on an hour by hour basis makes it harder. I also recognize that we are all in this together and that everyone is worried.

Fuck , I am sorry I have no point here I am just babbling and I don't want to work anyone else up.

Hang in there peps we got this.

JPPJ84

Rob, what a little cutie you have there!! She’s precious fresh air is excellent, especially now that spring is coming.
be well and stay safe!

Matt, all the best for you too, you’ll get through this!! Is home office impossible at your work?

lastexitlondon

Matt you are one of earth s great men
 Not many men  can be open like us on here. 
Keep going . I am hiding. You are not. Strong is what you are. 
I went on my bike and was proud but that  got swallowed by a wheez ive had ages. I now  have to stop the weed. How will i cope with Nothing. May have drink. Hope  not to. But since stopping drinking ive used weed once a day. Now i wheez.  Great for paranoia.  I thought weed would  be ok pure. But  turns out . Not.

Matts3221

JPPJ84 said:

Rob, what a little cutie you have there!! She’s precious fresh air is excellent, especially now that spring is coming.
be well and stay safe!

Matt, all the best for you too, you’ll get through this!! Is home office impossible at your work?

It is possible and we may go that way but we interact with the public as well so it is hard , I more or less run operations for a credit union and therefore members still need money.

We are looking at closing out lobby and just having our drive thru open. My job is more loans and mortgages , if we do end up shutting our doors I could do my work form home.

I mean honestly I have only seen 4 members today and all are across a desk from me with no contact but its just unnerving. Like I want to just scream and go sleep until this is all over , of course that is not possible but it would be nice.

What kills me the most is still hearing people say this is overblown and dumb and just the common cold , it is taking everything in my power not to yell at them. This is about all of us not just the singular person , as I said before I know my rate is like .04% fatality at my age , its not me its all those at risk and danger. I think people thing just the old and forget all those who are sick thru out the world with an underlaying issue.

It seems to show the best and worst in humanity right now , those hoarding all the supplies are the worst , I can also say so many people were being so nice to each other at the grocery story even though it felt there was a run on almost everything.

The last time I remember feeling like this and although it is a totally different situation was 9/11. Just in terms of the world getting flipped on its head , nothing else I am saying is the same . Also babbling but seems to help.

Thank you all for the kind words.

JPPJ84

By all means, if it makes you feel better, yell all you like. 

lastexitlondon

Post away
 As much as anyone needs
 We are all eachother.

Fifthelement

Thinking about everyone here.  Hope you’re all finding ways to cope and are able to put things in perspective.  Drink lots of water, exercise if you’re able, get fresh air, and don’t forget to breathe.

Thoughts_Arrive

post deleted

lastexitlondon

Times  like these i wish  i never had children. 
Ive lost my mind now. This morning i cant stop  thinking i want to end my life i cant breath or move every time  i fell asleep i woke sweating.  I cant take anymore

Fifthelement

I’m sorry your struggling so much Rob.  Hold on and just breathe.  You, and your family, will get through this.  Bring to mind You and your little girl making happy memories like this one you posted.

You’re struggling.  I get that.  Just know that we’re here for you.  (((Hugs)))

lastexitlondon

Thank  you i made myself go out . But  it didnt go so well. I have a  damn wheez thats got me thinking im dead  if i get this. But i had an hour with rosie again

lastexitlondon

benjs

I started on SSRIs last week for my first time to treat some depression that's been at bay for a while. On Saturday our building's fire alarm went off, and I sat in the corner trying not to focus on the sirens for 40 minutes while I felt my temperature rise and my heart race. Have never had an anxiety attack before but I suspect that's what it was.

Between Covid (the disease that's everywhere), Covid (the new work hat requiring everyone to drop all existing plans and pivot), Covid (the catalyst to financial question marks), Covid (the catalyst to social isolation), and the stressors and demons that were in my mind before this - times are tough.

Thinking about everyone who's mentally struggling and broadcasting hope for them into the ether.

lastexitlondon

Hi there  i was just reading  your post about  you  panicking.  Welcome. 
Ssri can cause panic in the first week from my experience.  Hang in there post as much as you need . Some of life's  great souls are here with  you.

oftenreading

Welcome, benjs - glad you posted. Here’s hoping that the SSRI helps. Medication won’t take away the reality of what we’re dealing with but I hope it helps reduce the symptoms to a level that allows you to get through and do what you need and want to do. 

benjs

Thank you both for your thoughts  

Agree that medication won't change our realities, but like you said, I just hope it helps me keep a positive outlook. I know that's been suffering most of all.

Matts3221

benjs said:

I started on SSRIs last week for my first time to treat some depression that's been at bay for a while. On Saturday our building's fire alarm went off, and I sat in the corner trying not to focus on the sirens for 40 minutes while I felt my temperature rise and my heart race. Have never had an anxiety attack before but I suspect that's what it was.

Between Covid (the disease that's everywhere), Covid (the new work hat requiring everyone to drop all existing plans and pivot), Covid (the catalyst to financial question marks), Covid (the catalyst to social isolation), and the stressors and demons that were in my mind before this - times are tough.

Thinking about everyone who's mentally struggling and broadcasting hope for them into the ether.

Welcome to the board , those types of meds can sometimes take up to 4-5 weeks to really kick into their full effect , I know when I started so very long ago I had a super dry mouth for the first week of taken them but that went away after that.

Covid is making everyone on edge right now so I truly feel for you and post as often as you like we are here as a group for each other.

Panic Attacks are very very hard and I am so sorry if you suffer from them. I would certainly follow up with your doctor a month or so from now if things don't feel "right" , they may switch your meds or even add an anti anxity med to the mix , of course this is all what you feel is best for you. Never want to push what works for me on others just offer advice.

Hang in there we are all in this together.

Matts3221

JPPJ84 said:

Rob, what a little cutie you have there!! She’s precious fresh air is excellent, especially now that spring is coming.
be well and stay safe!

Matt, all the best for you too, you’ll get through this!! Is home office impossible at your work?

So last night right around 5pm , my boss called me to let me know we were going to shut out lobby down so we have no face to face interaction with our clients.

There are three of us here and honestly it has brought my anxiety down greatly to know that I just feel a little safer , everyone can still do what they need too just without the interaction.

Hope everyone else is doing ok out there.

Love to all.

benjs

Matts3221 said:

benjs said:

I started on SSRIs last week for my first time to treat some depression that's been at bay for a while. On Saturday our building's fire alarm went off, and I sat in the corner trying not to focus on the sirens for 40 minutes while I felt my temperature rise and my heart race. Have never had an anxiety attack before but I suspect that's what it was.

Between Covid (the disease that's everywhere), Covid (the new work hat requiring everyone to drop all existing plans and pivot), Covid (the catalyst to financial question marks), Covid (the catalyst to social isolation), and the stressors and demons that were in my mind before this - times are tough.

Thinking about everyone who's mentally struggling and broadcasting hope for them into the ether.

Welcome to the board , those types of meds can sometimes take up to 4-5 weeks to really kick into their full effect , I know when I started so very long ago I had a super dry mouth for the first week of taken them but that went away after that.

Covid is making everyone on edge right now so I truly feel for you and post as often as you like we are here as a group for each other.

Panic Attacks are very very hard and I am so sorry if you suffer from them. I would certainly follow up with your doctor a month or so from now if things don't feel "right" , they may switch your meds or even add an anti anxity med to the mix , of course this is all what you feel is best for you. Never want to push what works for me on others just offer advice.

Hang in there we are all in this together.

Thanks so much for this, Matt! Indeed, I've got a super dry mouth these past few days (though I chalked it up to marijuana), but knock on wood, no other side effects yet (just that attack). Really hopeful that like you said, it's just my body adjusting to a new chemical presence.