A safe place for anxiety sufferers to share.

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  • mickeyrat
    mickeyrat Posts: 45,242
    catefrances said:
    mickeyrat said:
    last, how do you feel about the band tool?

    hey mickey!! 

    yeah TOOL are a great band to listen to. theyve helped me on numerous occcasions  clear my head.  there was a time when LATERALUS was my lullaby. id listen to it every night at bedtime. i found it so very soothing.  
    HEY yourself lady

    where the fuck ya been? out and about?
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • catefrances
    catefrances Posts: 29,003
    mickeyrat said:
    catefrances said:
    mickeyrat said:
    last, how do you feel about the band tool?

    hey mickey!! 

    yeah TOOL are a great band to listen to. theyve helped me on numerous occcasions  clear my head.  there was a time when LATERALUS was my lullaby. id listen to it every night at bedtime. i found it so very soothing.  
    HEY yourself lady

    where the fuck ya been? out and about?

    ive been doing stuff. working on my well being. planning my next big trip. contemplating a life without alcohol.. which didnt work out too well considering how big time i fell off the wagon (and re joined 10C. lol) this past week. 
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • mickeyrat
    mickeyrat Posts: 45,242
    catefrances said:
    mickeyrat said:
    catefrances said:
    mickeyrat said:
    last, how do you feel about the band tool?

    hey mickey!! 

    yeah TOOL are a great band to listen to. theyve helped me on numerous occcasions  clear my head.  there was a time when LATERALUS was my lullaby. id listen to it every night at bedtime. i found it so very soothing.  
    HEY yourself lady

    where the fuck ya been? out and about?

    ive been doing stuff. working on my well being. planning my next big trip. contemplating a life without alcohol.. which didnt work out too well considering how big time i fell off the wagon (and re joined 10C. lol) this past week. 
    recovery thread is still going. if you are so inclined.

    in any case, glad you're back. strong voice. much missed.
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • brianlux
    brianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 43,787
    lastexitlondon said:
    Man I'm struggling  so bad
    Sorry to hear that.  Hang in there!
    "It's a sad and beautiful world"
    -Roberto Benigni

  • Thoughts_Arrive
    Thoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    lastexitlondon said:
    Man I'm struggling  so bad
    Sorry to hear :(
    When's your next CBT session?
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 15,041
    Tomorrow  is my last because  it's not working the lady has escalated me to a waiting list to see an OCD specialist.  I'm just getting  worse and worse. I had a drink again . Today I've spent the whole day walking and I feel so very anxious. And my memory and confusion are unbearable  I just don't know where to turn. I forget everything  it's so distressing and I then have a panic attack  because  I forgot everything  again. Constant distress  can't   do this very much  longer.
    I wish it was all over


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 15,041
    They say because  I know I forgot that s a good thing. It's fuckin not 


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    It means you are self-aware, bud.  It may not feel like a good thing, but better to have that than not.

    Have you tried journaling, writing as a release, just for yourself?  Get a punching bag, spend time with animals, meditate, anything - no matter how small - you might not have attempted before?

    If not, keep letting it out here if it helps.  We're all pulling for you.
  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 15,041
    I'm so glad I can come here
     I have nowhere else


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 15,041
    I'm writing  now. Trying poems but forget I wrote  something  . Look back at it like it's new again


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 15,041
    Distressing 


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • camsjam
    camsjam Posts: 375
    Hang tough LE. maybe you could write stuff down to help you remember things? The shows will be here soon. Something to look forward to right?
  • Thoughts_Arrive
    Thoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Just keep posting here. Don't be sorry to. Everyone is here to support.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 15,041
    edited May 2018
    Thank you everyone it makes me tearful that people care.i spent the whole day outdoors in nature. I sat here last night felt like it all happen 2 days ago.  It's fuckin soul destroying that it's gone as soon as I did it . I've  woken up 4am with my daughter  and dark thoughts can't stop. I want this all to end now 
    Post edited by lastexitlondon on


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Thoughts_Arrive
    Thoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    lastexitlondon said:
    Thank you everyone it makes me tearful that people care.i spent the whole day outdoors in nature. I sat here last night felt like it all happen 2 days ago.  It's fuckin soul destroying that it's gone as soon as I did it . I've  woken up 4am with my daughter  and dark thoughts can't stop. I want this all to end now 
    How did it feel to be in nature?
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 15,041
    I was moved to tears  by a group of my polish on can friends . They put money together  to pay for my pj ticket to Krakow. I love these people and they have been my friends  for quite a while. Yesterday  my councillor  said she would have to call the mental health  crisis team because  she was concerned about my well being but as she didn't  think i would take my life that day she didn't  call them in the end. I try again today. But woke bad. 
    My polish  friends na zdrowie  .  Xx


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 15,041
    Thoughts_Arrive said:
    lastexitlondon said:
    Thank you everyone it makes me tearful that people care.i spent the whole day outdoors in nature. I sat here last night felt like it all happen 2 days ago.  It's fuckin soul destroying that it's gone as soon as I did it . I've  woken up 4am with my daughter  and dark thoughts can't stop. I want this all to end now 
    How did it feel to be in nature?
    In all honesty it didn't  work as I hoped. I can't  do anything . I walked like 6 hours in total. I'm a lost cause my brain doesn't  work like it did and it's worse . I feel  like nobody from the health care system hears my symptoms . I'm distressed  to the point of wanting it all to end now


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Thoughts_Arrive
    Thoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Damn, sorry to hear :(
    If it gets really bad call Samaritans or go to your local hospital. Stay safe dude.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • PJ_Soul
    PJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 50,919
    lastexitlondon said:
    Thoughts_Arrive said:
    lastexitlondon said:
    Thank you everyone it makes me tearful that people care.i spent the whole day outdoors in nature. I sat here last night felt like it all happen 2 days ago.  It's fuckin soul destroying that it's gone as soon as I did it . I've  woken up 4am with my daughter  and dark thoughts can't stop. I want this all to end now 
    How did it feel to be in nature?
    In all honesty it didn't  work as I hoped. I can't  do anything . I walked like 6 hours in total. I'm a lost cause my brain doesn't  work like it did and it's worse . I feel  like nobody from the health care system hears my symptoms . I'm distressed  to the point of wanting it all to end now
    If you are really feeling that distressed and are contemplating ending it, please do as TA says, and get yourself to a hospital immediately, and tell them you're having suicidal thoughts.
    I'm sorry things are so hard right now.
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • Thoughts_Arrive
    Thoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    How are you Lastexit?
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014

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