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Stone Gossard...

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  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    failedpersephone wrote:
    Stone tried unsuccessfully to garner the nickname "Shlonger" for himself.

    If he had stayed away from the pencil sharpener it would have been his!
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone once had an elevator experience with Steven Tyler from Aerosmith.


    yep, he's the dude that looks like a lady.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    mookie9999 wrote:
    If he had stayed away from the pencil sharpener it would have been his!

    :D:D:D:D
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    mookie9999 wrote:
    Stone originally wanted to call Mother Love Bone- Mother's Love Stone due to his obsession with MILF'S

    Sorry, had to bump this one for the afternoon crowd. I think it might be my personal favorite (of the ones I've posted).
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone can eat just one lays potato chip.


    he has incredible will power.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    mookie9999 wrote:
    Stone's life goal is to have no regrets and to fuck the inventor of velcro.


    this is my favorite of your posts.

    still makes me laugh because i can kinda hear the sound of fucking the inventor of velcro in my head....it's a miracle i can still sleep at night. :eek:
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    failedpersephone wrote:
    Stone Gossard believes he sees messages from god in his alphabet soup.


    Jeff spends a great deal of time arranging the letters to form messages that cause Stone to do an awful lot of very random acts.

    awww. How cute!
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    failedpersephone wrote:
    this is my favorite of your posts.

    still makes me laugh because i can kinda hear the sound of fucking the inventor of velcro in my head....it's a miracle i can still sleep at night. :eek:

    The of the poor wife of the inventor of velcro! You know that sick bastard is constantly pulling things apart made of velcro while yelling "Who Made This?!?!? Damn RIght I Made This!!" I don't know which of yours is my favorite. Too many gems to pick from. But I love it whenever something that gets posted on here pisses someone else off, so in that case I'm still loving the jello enema.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone has a nerf bed.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    mookie9999 wrote:
    The of the poor wife of the inventor of velcro! You know that sick bastard is constantly pulling things apart made of velcro while yelling "Who Made This?!?!? Damn RIght I Made This!!" I don't know which of yours is my favorite. Too many gems to pick from. But I love it whenever something that gets posted on here pisses someone else off, so in that case I'm still loving the jello enema.

    The one about Stone having the longest domino chain. Attemting to knock the first one over with his 'winkle dinkle' and then knocking the others over simultaniously! :D

    Stone likes it when you make up jokes about the length of his winkle dinkle!
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    "WINKLE DINKLE"

    okay, I now have a new favorite slang term.


    duude, that is prolly the awesomest evar!


    Stone once was feeding the pigeons near his favorite park, when one sat on hi Winkle dinkle and proceeded to peck out in morse code what would later become the lyrics to his song "pigeon"


    and, no he's not through sleepin around, yet.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard bought part of the old sesame street set, because he has had the dream of fucking the goo straight out of Oscar's trashcan since he was about 14 years old.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone can play "radar love" on a kazoo shoved into his butt.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone wants that freakin' punk-ass Justin Timberlake to stop claiming that he brought Sexy back.


    Everyone knows it wasn't gone - and it still resides in Stone's trousers.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    failedpersephone wrote:
    "WINKLE DINKLE"

    okay, I now have a new favorite slang term.


    duude, that is prolly the awesomest evar!


    Stone once was feeding the pigeons near his favorite park, when one sat on hi Winkle dinkle and proceeded to peck out in morse code what would later become the lyrics to his song "pigeon"


    and, no he's not through sleepin around, yet.

    Okay! You have RUINED that for me now! It WAS an innocent word. Grrrr, you corrupt! :D;)
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone was trying to make himself a very innocent grilled cheese sandwich using a 'sandwich express" grilling machine, when lo and behold his Winkle Dinkle burst forth from his zipped trousers and before he knew it was released Stone shut and latched the machine with his WINKLE DINKLE inside...


    no harm, no foul...his WINKLE DINKLE now has very attractive grill line indentations and Stone can (and does) claim that he "plumps when cooked"
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone's Winkle Dinkle has now been photographed over 35,678 times.

    by Stone Gossard.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    When he was a young child and learning to potty in the toilet, Stone's mother accidentally dropped the lid down and slightly bent Stone's WINKLE DINKLE.


    His Winkle Dinkle veers left, for your pleasure, Milady.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone uses the following as a pick up line: 'my Winkle Dinkle just really rolls off your tongue now doesn't it, sweet stuff?"

    it doesn't work.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    You're so rude! Behave yourself!

    When someone makes a sales call to Stone, he likes to respond by saying 'I'm glad you called because I wanted to talk to you about Jesus'
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    MattCameronKicksButt wrote:
    You're so rude! Behave yourself!'


    hahahaa who me?? :D

    Once, Stone tried to snort cocaine off of a stripper's arse. erm, he ended up snorting the stripper's arse and leaving the coke in a pile on the floor.


    This of course, had nothing to do with his Winkle Dinkle.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    failedpersephone wrote:
    hahahaa who me?? :D

    Once, Stone tried to snort cocaine off of a stripper's ass. erm, he ended up snorting the stripper's ass and leaving the coke in a pile on the floor.


    This of course, had nothing to do with his Winkle Dinkle.

    Seriously, don't get your thread banned girl! It is soooo funny!
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    Stone Gossard likes to 'fluff' the American national anthem.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    MattCameronKicksButt wrote:
    Seriously, don't get your thread banned girl! It is soooo funny!


    well that is why "Winkle Dinkle is so freakin delightful...ahh the possibilities...

    Stone tried to publish a children's book titled, "Adventures of Winkle Dinkle, Canine Cop."

    it was painted entirely in the "finger paint style" but it wasn't his finger...
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard sometimes feels like a nut, sometimes he doesn't...although HE NEVER FEELS LIKE COCONUT...SO, WTF????
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    failedpersephone wrote:
    Stone Gossard sometimes feels like a nut, sometimes he doesn't...although HE NEVER FEELS LIKE COCONUT...SO, WTF????

    perhaps I need to drink more wine because everthing (I) think of seems too offensive to me tonight.

    ...

    ...
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone wants to be known as "mr. yo-yo" except, he cant use a yo-yo for more than two rotations.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    My boyfriend says 'microwaved popcorn always pop's when it is near him'! wtf?!

    The real joke: He has no idea who Stone IS! Bless...
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    ahhhh, My BF knows only too well who Stone is...the name I call out.


    KIDDING!!!
    seriousy! that was a really depressing joke.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    failedpersephone wrote:
    ahhhh, My BF knows only too well who Stone is...the name I call out.


    KIDDING!!!
    seriousy! that was a really depressing joke.

    I'm sure you at least don't call your son Pearl Jam! - Pearl Jam! come here!

    Stone Gossard likes to have an indian on a Saturday night...
    (They're should be an icon for gritting your teeth and smiling at the same time). :);)
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