Fun with Quotes

AmentsChick

So, how'd you do with that Russian mail order bride service? Did you manage to work out a fair trade with the proprietor? And...btw, why did you sign up on the Pit in the first place?

Vedd Hedd wrote:

Ive been looking on there for a while, and not much that I can trade for it. People who have it want stuff that I dont have.

Figured I might find someone here.

http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?p=4713698#post4713698

norm

yep, dunkman had sex with a transsexual chimp over the weekend.

Brain of J.Lo wrote:

Further proof that Axe Body Spray really is irresistable.

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4714761&postcount=15

Brain of J.Lo

This is my favorite thread ever.

TrixieCat

mookie9999 wrote:

So Trixie, did you ever convince your husband to have that "get together" with NYPJ1, metsy, Lou, Cory, and a vat of recycled lard?



http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4687522&postcount=839

Only if you are joining in. Oh and bring your girl.
She told me you are catching quite the quick buck down in Chelsea.

mookie9999 wrote:

Selling myself pays better than what you would think.

TrixieCat

AmentsChick, did you know that our private pm coversations have been hacked into and every guy on here (and some girls ) know what we have been talking about?

AmentsChick wrote:

It's that why I feel like I need a cold shower?? hmm....

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4706025&postcount=219

AmentsChick

TrixieCat wrote:

AmentsChick, did you know that our private pm coversations have been hacked into and every guy on here (and some girls ) know what we have been talking about?



http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4706025&postcount=219

Guess you're screwed then!

SENROCK

mookie9999 wrote:

Mr. Lizard,

We just wanted to write you and let you know that your insurance will cover your penile implant surgery. Unfortunately, you will only be covered for the 3 inch extension, which although is not the 18 inches you had requested, it still will triple your current size. Please call our receptionist to set up your appointment.

Sincerely,

Dr. Vinny Boombatz




http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4634903&postcount=96

that is GENIUS!!!

i cant believe i haddnt read this thread til last night. im laughing so loud right now that i cant even focus!!! nice work!

mookie9999

Has anyone else heard about that new group called the Oily's? They're 6 or 7 (depending if they have the crane to get #7 out of bed) 500+lbs guys who wrestle in wesson oil and then bring up some has-been rocker on stage and perform a reach around on him.

SENROCK! wrote:

they do some really good shows! i cant wait to see them on the SAME stage as my boy KID ROCK!!!!!!!

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4712195&postcount=15

norm

when you were hitchhiking, how many hand jobs did you give to get across the country?

soulsinging wrote:

2009.

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4717777&postcount=2

mookie9999

DAMNIT!!! WHO FARTED?!?!?

josevolution wrote:

excuse me ......

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4717768&postcount=4

cory

After breaking into my home and stealing movies I made with my wife, mookie9999 came up with his first original riddle...

mookie9999 wrote:

What comes in quarts?

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4634771&postcount=137

mookie9999

How exactly do you handle the vein (aka crease) in a mans special part?

SENROCK! wrote:

finger on one side of the crease and tongue on the other..... thats how its done!

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4717833&postcount=21

norm

hey fanch, did ya ever find your strap-on?

fanch75 wrote:

I found it! Apparently I slipped it into my work laptop case without realizing it. Found it this morning when I got into work.

So yes I'm going to get this thing sewn onto me, haha.

Werd.

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4314410&postcount=18

mookie9999

Cory you were telling me how you are able to swallow on cue by closing your eyes and then what?

cory wrote:

Then I wash it down with Sunny Delight and punch my mom in the tits.

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4681044&postcount=6

SENROCK

mookie9999 wrote:

How exactly do you handle the vein (aka crease) in a mans special part?




http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4717833&postcount=21

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SNAP!!! nicely done.

cory

mookie9999 wrote:

Cory you were telling me how you are able to swallow on cue by closing your eyes and then what?



http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4681044&postcount=6

I never knew that such an awesome post would come back to haunt me one day. Touche my friend. Touche. Be on the lookout for redemption;)

norm

http://www.beautifulmag.eu/beautiful/images/beautiful_joe_oppedisano8.jpg

NY PJ1 wrote:

nice

that pic was awesome thanx

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4717882&postcount=35

cory

Due to mookie9999's erectile dysfunction, he is frequently overheard saying the below phrase as he works up enough courage to pleasure male Mexican prostitutes......

mookie9999 wrote:

You have the patience of a saint.

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4642963&postcount=14

mookie9999

cory wrote:

I never knew that such an awesome post would come back to haunt me one day. Touche my friend. Touche. Be on the lookout for redemption;)

I'll be on the lookout. I know it will sting! Just to screw you from using this line I will add absolutely nothing here. Start searching!


EDIT: nevermind

norm

what do you think of barry manilow's song "mandy"?

cory wrote:

I've already had this song made into a 3-dimensional polygon that can jerk me off on command.

True Story.

http://forums.pearljam.com/showpost.php?p=4717914&postcount=2