Stone Gossard...

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  • cory
    cory Posts: 736
    Stone lived with a family of hermaphrodites in the summer of 1972. It was there where he learned how to go fuck himself.




    Thanks. I'll be in town all week. Tip your waitresses.
    Revive the heart of the heartless...

    Why would you start was has no end?
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard hangs out at Chuck E. Cheese, because he likes to pilfer used wrapping paper from children's gifts.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    cory wrote:
    Stone lived with a family of hermaphrodites in the summer of 1972. It was there where he learned how to go fuck himself.




    Thanks. I'll be in town all week. Tip your waitresses.


    ahahaaaaa..."you guys have been great! really, Des Moines is my favorite town"

    Stone once tried to become the human torch...his mother used 3 extinguishers to put him out - and after 15 skin grafts you can barely tell!
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard is able to remove cancer from a person's body. it involves a pully, some of his high-powered ass gas, and the pubes of a leprechaun.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard once convinced Eddie Vedder to help him with some "taffy pulling" Mr. Vedder did not notice the air quotes Stone employed when explaining what he would be needed to do. this only happened once.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard wears a coonskin cap and insists that you call him "Mr. Boone" as one of his pre-show rituals.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone has been known to crap peanut m&m's
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard convinced Boom to use a coffee enema...but forgot to tell him that most people dont use fresh scalding hot coffee...
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • cory
    cory Posts: 736
    Stone Gossard won the Indy 500 while driving a 1986 Ford Escort. Afterwards, he celebrated by drinking milk directly from a stripper's tit.
    Revive the heart of the heartless...

    Why would you start was has no end?
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard doesn't acknowledge the color yellow. he calls it "piss" and refuses to have anything to do with it.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    pssssst...have you ever had a "Stoney Steamer"??


    it's like a Cleveland Steamer, only afterwards Stone punches you really hard in the chest.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard has removed all pictures of himself as a child from any database...this is because of an unfortunate hair growth that helps to explain his childhood nickname "Dirty Sanchez" Gossard.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard once ate a whole turkey while it was still frozen. There was no bet involved, and actually his family was pretty disappointed since it was their Thanksgiving day turkey.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard still gets breast fed by his great aunt Elma.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard often eats rabbit pellets that he finds on the floor...he calls them "Bunny Bites" and no one wants to explain that they are not chocolate leftovers from the easter bunny.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard refers to Moses as "that pussy that couldn't separate his own ass cheeks." But most of his acquaintances believe this is just an eccentric sign of bitterness on Stone's part for not being able to part the Pacific Ocean for longer than a fortnight.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard answers his cell phone by burping the national anthem of Yugoslavia.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard loves rice pudding.


    a little too much.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard invented the edible dong.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard punched Willie Nelson in the face. He wanted him to give him back his def lepard bong.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.

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