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Stone Gossard...

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  • happy_larryhappy_larry Posts: 221
    After years of searching all over the world for one and with a lot of encouragement from Jeff, Stone Gossard was very dissapointed when Eddie told him that a beefcake wasn't really a cake of beef.
    Leeds 06
    Wembley 07
    Shepherds Bush
    Manchester
  • AiCPearlJamWeenAiCPearlJamWeen Posts: 785
    1STmammal2wearPants wrote:
    Stone Gossard urinates gold.

    Stone must be VERY dehydrated........drink Gatorade!




    Here is mine:

    Stone has a policy in which he can ONLY walk into a strip club with a MasterCard.
  • TrixieCatTrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    Stone Gossard churns his own butter.
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • happy_larryhappy_larry Posts: 221
    After years of waiting at the DIY store for the clerk to come back Stone Gossard finally realised that when Jeff asked him to go pick up a long stand, he might have been playing a joke on him.
    Leeds 06
    Wembley 07
    Shepherds Bush
    Manchester
  • happy_larryhappy_larry Posts: 221
    Stone Gossard can hear pudding
    Leeds 06
    Wembley 07
    Shepherds Bush
    Manchester
  • AiCPearlJamWeenAiCPearlJamWeen Posts: 785
    Stone has been the only succesful male to give 2Pac a hug on camera.

    Stone cry's tears of platinum

    Stone has decided to get PJ to play Rochester NY!
  • TrixieCatTrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    Stone Gossard is more curious than George, longer AND taller than Sally and happier than Jack.
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • happy_larryhappy_larry Posts: 221
    Stone Gossard has been known to bite when cornered
    Leeds 06
    Wembley 07
    Shepherds Bush
    Manchester
  • happy_larryhappy_larry Posts: 221
    Stone Gossard neither loves nor hates Marmite
    Leeds 06
    Wembley 07
    Shepherds Bush
    Manchester
  • happy_larryhappy_larry Posts: 221
    Stone Gossard is going to get me in A LOT of trouble is my boss realises just how much time I'm spending on documenting his extra curricular exploits.
    Leeds 06
    Wembley 07
    Shepherds Bush
    Manchester
  • TrixieCatTrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    Stone Gossard can guess your weight within 40 lbs. If he can't, and he never hasn't been able to, he will give you a red balloon.
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • TrixieCatTrixieCat Posts: 5,756
    Stone Gossard likes to push it. Push it real good.
    Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
    And I don't feel right when you're gone away
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard is in the Guinness book of world records a record 873 times.


    most of the entries involve peanut butter, masturbation, Wolverine Collectibles or Spam.


    243 of the entries involve all 4 of the above items.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • happy_larryhappy_larry Posts: 221
    Stone Gossard is terrified of flying and refuses to get on a plane. The other band members get him on overseas tours by lacing his glass of milk with a powerful sleeping agent.
    Leeds 06
    Wembley 07
    Shepherds Bush
    Manchester
  • corycory Posts: 736
    Stone Gossard can masturbate.......no-handed.
    Revive the heart of the heartless...

    Why would you start was has no end?
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard wonders if you people ever sleep? He doesn't have to sleep - he is blessed with the metabolic rate of a hummingbird.


    He takes a whole lot of quaaludes in order to play "daughter" at real speed.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    cory wrote:
    Stone Gossard can masturbate.......no-handed.


    I've seen that.

    :eek:

    on a related note, Stone Gossard has opposable big toes...like a monkey.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard once had to fight 92 ninjas...so he split himself into separate clones...proceeded to kick their collective asses, and decided that he enjoyed watching himself have sex so much that he kept 3 of his clones around...the rest he consumed in a rich and hearty gravy.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard invented the electronic timecard...because he really just likes to fuck with the workin' man.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • corycory Posts: 736
    Stone Gossard wears A-1 Steak Sauce as cologne to attract neighborhood dogs for the sole purpose of kicking them in the face.
    Revive the heart of the heartless...

    Why would you start was has no end?
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    TrixieCat wrote:
    A long time ago I wondered what Stone Gossard would think of all this.
    I always had a back-of-the-mind-sneaking-suspicion that failed was Stone. lol

    If I were Stone, I would think it was hysterical. But Stone, if you are privvy to this and you are offended, I will give more money to help out Mr Leatherback.


    Stone Gossard wanted to support Mr. Leatherback because of that one night he spent with him back in the wild summer of '96...Stone Gossard couldn't post on this message board - when he types he is so fast that he melts keyboards...
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard tried to convert to Judaism...but decided against it when he was told that he wouldn't get to go to vacation bible school...Stone likes the nuns...mmmmmmm habits.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard trick or treats on July 31st in order to get the best candies.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard once visited Puerto Rico, they have asked that he not return until they can bolster their rum supplies.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard wears bunny ears to sleep...his beloved grandma used to tell the young Stoney to "bounce off to bed little rabbit" this is how he remembers her.

    (aaaaaaawwwww)
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone doesn't drink coffee in the morning; listening to "You're the Best" from The Karate Kid Soundtrack starts his day off right.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard leaves post-it note love notes to his gardener tacked to his lawn mower...he isn't in love with him - he just likes to spread his immense sexual charisma onto a less well-endowed individual.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard once fucked a dung beetle...it wasn't on a bet, and to be honest, it is the reason that Eddie has to sleep with a can of "Raid" and a night light...
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard once made a sex toy using spam, a block of unadulterated beeswax, and a plunger. He called it the Tinky Goss and it is illegal everywhere except Amsterdam.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • electronblueelectronblue WPB Florida Posts: 3,460
    Stone Gossard can reach an e-bow from anywhere...~
    ********************************
    "Forgive every being,
    the bad feelings 
    it's just me"


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