A safe place for anxiety sufferers to share.

PJ_Soul

rgambs said:

brianlux said:

Today I realized, "Fvck!  In less than a week I have to leave for 7 days because of roofing work."  I love day trips but it's gotten to where staying away from home even one night is hard.  A week may prove to be nearly overwhelming.  I know I have to do it, probably nothing bad will happen, but I'm already majorly stressing over having to leave for that long.  I have poor auditory discrimination so when I'm gone at night, my brain engages and zooms in on every freakin' sound trying to identify it so as to know where I am is secure.  Strange places are a war zone of sounds.  Next week will be a huge challenge for me.  Gotta get through it.

Can you just wear headphones and listen to groovy tunes the whole time?

That's a good idea. Or just earplugs. Plus maybe a Nytol or two?

brianlux

rgambs said:

brianlux said:

Today I realized, "Fvck!  In less than a week I have to leave for 7 days because of roofing work."  I love day trips but it's gotten to where staying away from home even one night is hard.  A week may prove to be nearly overwhelming.  I know I have to do it, probably nothing bad will happen, but I'm already majorly stressing over having to leave for that long.  I have poor auditory discrimination so when I'm gone at night, my brain engages and zooms in on every freakin' sound trying to identify it so as to know where I am is secure.  Strange places are a war zone of sounds.  Next week will be a huge challenge for me.  Gotta get through it.

Can you just wear headphones and listen to groovy tunes the whole time?

When I do have to overnight elsewhere, I always take my portable CD player with headphones, extra batteries and a stack of CD's including (always!) the two solo albums J Mascis made and some P.J., Replacements and Uncle Neil plus whatever the latest I'm listening to.  The only problem is, I can't lie on my back face up due to vertigo issues and lying on my side with ear bugs or headphones gets uncomfortable very fast. 

I know... just take me out to pasture and shoot me. 

rgambs

brianlux said:brianlux said:

rgambs said:

brianlux said:

Today I realized, "Fvck!  In less than a week I have to leave for 7 days because of roofing work."  I love day trips but it's gotten to where staying away from home even one night is hard.  A week may prove to be nearly overwhelming.  I know I have to do it, probably nothing bad will happen, but I'm already majorly stressing over having to leave for that long.  I have poor auditory discrimination so when I'm gone at night, my brain engages and zooms in on every freakin' sound trying to identify it so as to know where I am is secure.  Strange places are a war zone of sounds.  Next week will be a huge challenge for me.  Gotta get through it.

Can you just wear headphones and listen to groovy tunes the whole time?

When I do have to overnight elsewhere, I always take my portable CD player with headphones, extra batteries and a stack of CD's including (always!) the two solo albums J Mascis made and some P.J., Replacements and Uncle Neil plus whatever the latest I'm listening to.  The only problem is, I can't lie on my back face up due to vertigo issues and lying on my side with ear bugs or headphones gets uncomfortable very fast. 

I know... just take me out to pasture and shoot me. 

rgambs said:

brianlux said:

Today I realized, "Fvck!  In less than a week I have to leave for 7 days because of roofing work."  I love day trips but it's gotten to where staying away from home even one night is hard.  A week may prove to be nearly overwhelming.  I know I have to do it, probably nothing bad will happen, but I'm already majorly stressing over having to leave for that long.  I have poor auditory discrimination so when I'm gone at night, my brain engages and zooms in on every freakin' sound trying to identify it so as to know where I am is secure.  Strange places are a war zone of sounds.  Next week will be a huge challenge for me.  Gotta get through it.

Can you just wear headphones and listen to groovy tunes the whole time?

When I do have to overnight elsewhere, I always take my portable CD player with headphones, extra batteries and a stack of CD's including (always!) the two solo albums J Mascis made and some P.J., Replacements and Uncle Neil plus whatever the latest I'm listening to.  The only problem is, I can't lie on my back face up due to vertigo issues and lying on my side with ear bugs or headphones gets uncomfortable very fast. 

I know... just take me out to pasture and shoot me. 

Simple solution.
Just hang from the ceiling like a bat.

oftenreading

 
 
Like this?

brianlux

oftenreading said:

 
 
Like this?

Gnarly! 

i_lov_it

lastexitlondon said:

I'm just going to my emergency  mental health  appointment  to get me back into the system at a higher level. I can't  stop crying utter despair . Thank you for caring my friend 

Hey lastexit...hope you are doing ok?...I know this sounds a little cliché but just try to focus on the positive things and things that make you happy

Try not to focus on the negative instead focus on the Postives
I know it's easier said than done but the thing is you can get so much help and advice from people but it's up to you to put it into action...
The fact that you're still here and talking on these Forums is a good positive sign...

i_lov_it

So many strong and courageous people here...makes me Smile

lastexitlondon

Love to every one  especially those who fight every second  of every day to get back what they lost. 
Very low on strength.  I must and can only do this myself. 

brianlux

lastexitlondon said:

Love to every one  especially those who fight every second  of every day to get back what they lost. 
Very low on strength.  I must and can only do this myself. 

I'm in a particularly vulnerable anxiety place myself right now, lastexit.  Good to have love and support here!  Hang in there!

lastexitlondon

This is so awful I have nowhere  to turn. Every service I tried turned me back to the last one who didn t want .me.  saw my g.p again after 1 month of not seeing him. Im so fuckin desperate for these symptoms  to abate i cant carry on. 

lastexitlondon

Brian fear is a motherfucker . Hang in there I'm trying the same in the face of the worst feeling  I can remember  having

Gingerlou77

lastexitlondon said:

This is so awful I have nowhere  to turn. Every service I tried turned me back to the last one who didn t want .me.  saw my g.p again after 1 month of not seeing him. Im so fuckin desperate for these symptoms  to abate i cant carry on. 

I don't know your history but have you been seen by the crisis team?x 

lastexitlondon

Yes before now. And I had am emergency  assessment in which they said they would contact me with a plan . I heard nothing  for 1 month  until I phoned back at my Dr request. They then said they won't be sending me to their  services. 

HughFreakingDillon

lastexitlondon said:

Yes before now. And I had am emergency  assessment in which they said they would contact me with a plan . I heard nothing  for 1 month  until I phoned back at my Dr request. They then said they won't be sending me to their  services. 

are they saying why to all of these rejections?

Gingerlou77

lastexitlondon said:

Yes before now. And I had am emergency  assessment in which they said they would contact me with a plan . I heard nothing  for 1 month  until I phoned back at my Dr request. They then said they won't be sending me to their  services. 

I'm sorry, you're being failed.  Hang in there, baby steps. Will you be at the London shows?xx 

PJ_Soul

HughFreakingDillon said:

lastexitlondon said:

Yes before now. And I had am emergency  assessment in which they said they would contact me with a plan . I heard nothing  for 1 month  until I phoned back at my Dr request. They then said they won't be sending me to their  services. 

are they saying why to all of these rejections?

I was going to ask the same thing. If you know why they're saying no, it's easier to find a way to make them say yes.

lastexitlondon

They said I have had many kinds of counselling  and need to try and remember  it and apply it. They don't know what to do with me because  I tried all their meds and none helped . I'm not taking their  tablets so basically  they can't offer anything  else. Until I attempt suicide  and have a plan  for it. I'm phoning  the emergency  help line today. I can't  stay awake. And I'm in turmoil  in my sleep . It's not fair on my family . My brain and body are now giving up.  

Thoughts_Arrive

Pretty sad that the mental health care where you live is so poor.
I hope you find a way dude.
Hang in there.

lastexitlondon

I know my own body and something is horribly  wrong.  But as I ask each time I'm greeted  with anxiety . Well this time these last 8 months  on mental and physical  deterioration I'm told even that I'm doing well because of my "chronic health anxiety " yes the new word for hyercondria. Well i don't  post here often  anymore as it's going on and on over the same old ground and some get pissed off and I also get scared . It's hard for a 42 year old man father of 4 to say I'm scared to death  but I am. No amount of drugs will make it stop legal or illegal ones. I decided to type here out of despair  and to give my girlfriend  a break from me constantly  . And I mean constantly  asking her for help and reassurance which I know I'm not to do. I'm just writing this as I sit alone with the phone in hand wondering  who to ask for help. I'm not sure samaratins or mental health line. I will call my g.p at 8.30 because  they say I can if I am in despair. But even 8.30 seems to far away. It's 6.42am

Thoughts_Arrive

Hang in there bud.
Try samaritans until 8.30 comes around.
Don't worry about pissing people off here. It's a place of support not judgment. 
It takes a man to express his feelings, in your case, fear, disregard societal expectations of manhood. 

lastexitlondon

Many thanks
Phoned mental health line not worth the call
 So I am waiting.  Will try gp

brianlux

lastexitlondon said:

Many thanks
Phoned mental health line not worth the call
 So I am waiting.  Will try gp

Good thoughts for you, my friend.

giventofly69

lastexitlondon said:

I know my own body and something is horribly  wrong.  But as I ask each time I'm greeted  with anxiety . Well this time these last 8 months  on mental and physical  deterioration I'm told even that I'm doing well because of my "chronic health anxiety " yes the new word for hyercondria. Well i don't  post here often  anymore as it's going on and on over the same old ground and some get pissed off and I also get scared . It's hard for a 42 year old man father of 4 to say I'm scared to death  but I am. No amount of drugs will make it stop legal or illegal ones. I decided to type here out of despair  and to give my girlfriend  a break from me constantly  . And I mean constantly  asking her for help and reassurance which I know I'm not to do. I'm just writing this as I sit alone with the phone in hand wondering  who to ask for help. I'm not sure samaratins or mental health line. I will call my g.p at 8.30 because  they say I can if I am in despair. But even 8.30 seems to far away. It's 6.42am

I've skimmed through parts of this thread...

Please do keep posting here Lastexit if it helps you.  Like Thoughts_Arrive said ... it's a place of support not judgment.

Hearts and thoughts to you.

lastexitlondon

I'm about to do the hardest thing a guy with chronic  health anxiety  could do in the quest for a breath of air. For 3 hours of heaven. But it costs everything. I'm going to Amsterdam  for the day tomorrow  to chase the dream I always  had. But now it's different.  But remember  me for never giving up and until the last breath I chased my dream though  so ill I can't  understand  how and what I'm doing. Loud love. Rob

oftenreading

lastexitlondon said:

I'm about to do the hardest thing a guy with chronic  health anxiety  could do in the quest for a breath of air. For 3 hours of heaven. But it costs everything. I'm going to Amsterdam  for the day tomorrow  to chase the dream I always  had. But now it's different.  But remember  me for never giving up and until the last breath I chased my dream though  so ill I can't  understand  how and what I'm doing. Loud love. Rob

Good for you!! You rock, LEL. 

SmallestOceans

lastexitlondon said:

I'm about to do the hardest thing a guy with chronic  health anxiety  could do in the quest for a breath of air. For 3 hours of heaven. But it costs everything. I'm going to Amsterdam  for the day tomorrow  to chase the dream I always  had. But now it's different.  But remember  me for never giving up and until the last breath I chased my dream though  so ill I can't  understand  how and what I'm doing. Loud love. Rob

Safe travels Rob. So you won’t be at tonight’s show but tomorrow’s? You gonna try to get near the rail?

lastexitlondon

Well the sick  people will be coming out and queue straight  from tonight so I will be there 9am. But who knows where that will get me.i feel really ill and spaced out but im doing it . This is. This is my......last exit

lastexitlondon

Do you know Frank.  My polish friend and her husband have my other Krakow ticket said I do not have to pay for it so they said spend the money on this.

lastexitlondon

I'm so grateful  and I do believe  if you do good . Then good comes back. This show and the Krakow one have been paid for by  dear friends

lastexitlondon

Also as if chronic  health anxiety  is not hard enough  can you actually  believe  my baby daughter is ill. My partner  has just thrown up from a migraine. And I have to feed the rest of the kids whilst feeling personalized  and spaced out. I swear I could just fuckin blow my brains out.