On-line dating? I give up!

catefrances

locked wrote:

... 6) Women who look kinda like men in their photos.. There I said it...I could show you some that have adam's apples the size of manhattan...

so youre not looking to plant your seed in the garden of eden, then??



oh god that was so bad. :roll:

soulsinging

locked wrote:

6) Women who look kinda like men in their photos.. There I said it...I could show you some that have adam's apples the size of manhattan...

i got highly rated by a woman with a very noticeable adam's apple the other day. no thanks

Drowned Out

locked wrote:

Lauri wrote:

I just remembered this list I wrote on Facebook a little over a year ago when I was trying out match.com for the first time in about 3 years. I thought it would be funny for this thread:

Top 10 Match.com profile deal breakers
10. Shirtless photos
9. Uses the word "lady"
8. Screen name contains any variation on "Red Sox Fan."
7. Wants a girl that "takes care of herself." You don't want a girl who takes care of herself, you want someone skinny, there's a difference, so why don't you just say so?
6. Is 30 years old but is seeking women age 18-25.
5. Every photo contains a polo shirt and khakis- you can't be playing golf or working at Best Buy ALL the time.
4. First line of intro is something like "I never thought I'd try something like match.com."
3. Talks about "snuggling."
2. Loves life, is living the good life, or lives life to the fullest.
1. Enjoys both going out on the town or, shocker, spending a quiet night at home.

LMAO..

on the female side I had these turn-offs:
1) she is equally comfortable in a black dress or a pair of jeans (what is this.. a perfume commercial?)
2) Woman who profess to be RED SOX GIRL.... Yah... No, me thinks not..
3) Has a list of things her ideal man IS and ISNT.. (This is a passive aggressive form of nagging online IMO)
4) Goes on and on about how she is inudated with all the winks that she can't possibly respond to... Geez.."HOUSTON The EGO HAS LANDED!"
5) Has pics with her surronded by other women (mostly hot)... Is this a "Where's Waldo" test.. who exactly is the girl in this profile?
6) Women who look kinda like men in their photos.. There I said it...I could show you some that have adam's apples the size of manhattan...

For me, #2 would be any variation of screen name that incorporates the word 'princess'. You are not a contestant on The Bachelor. Deal with it.
Also, anyone who lists shopping as an interest gets red flagged instantly....
And...I'm wary of anyone that goes on and on about 'if you're a player, liar or cheat, don't bother - I'm not looking for one night stands, so if that's you blah blah blah.....'.....do these women really think a guy that is willing to lie and cheat for sex is going to read that and go 'DAMNIT, I thought she'd be down...oh, and she's not looking for players, this just isn't gonna work out'....?? Those statements have 'issues' written all over them...if she's already bitching and THAT suspicious, can you imagine a relationship with her!?

Lauri

Drowned Out wrote:

For me, #2 would be any variation of screen name that incorporates the word 'princess'. You are not a contestant on The Bachelor. Deal with it.
Also, anyone who lists shopping as an interest gets red flagged instantly....
And...I'm wary of anyone that goes on and on about 'if you're a player, liar or cheat, don't bother - I'm not looking for one night stands, so if that's you blah blah blah.....'.....do these women really think a guy that is willing to lie and cheat for sex is going to read that and go 'DAMNIT, I thought she'd be down...oh, and she's not looking for players, this just isn't gonna work out'....?? Those statements have 'issues' written all over them...if she's already bitching and THAT suspicious, can you imagine a relationship with her!?

I think in general anyone who makes demands about who you should or shouldn't be to contact them is out. If a guy who possesses characteristics I am not looking for emails me, I just don't write back. It's not up to me preemptively rule out certain people. That to me is just really negative. Write what you ARE looking for, but don't write what you're NOT looking for. We all have things are turn on and turn offs but making demands in your profile is just...ugh. A lot of people make physical demands which is ridiculous. Like "sorry but if you are overweight don't write to me." I'm sorry but putting that in your profile just makes you come off as a shallow jerk, and it does no good. Is it really THAT much skin off your back if someone who doesn't meet your physical standards dares to write to you? Like you are so turned off by everyone who does not meet what your personal standard happens to be that you can't even stand to have them turn up in your inbox. Everyone has the right to write to whomever they want to and then it's up to the recipient to determine if they want to write back.

and also with these people who make these demands about height and weight or whatever...it's like they expect everyone else to have the same standard of what they consider "short" or "overweight." It's like some person of the opposite sex might have wanted to write to them, but then this statement puts doubt in their head like, "well I don't think I'm really overweight, but this guy might be judging from Ralph Lauren standards..." but more likely they won't write because now they know what kind of an idiot you are.

Although that being said I add at the end of my profile to please not contact me if you are racist or sexist. I think these people know who they are.

Heatherj43

I have met 3 guys via online dating...all of them not anything what I'd want. The first one was a state cop...that says enough. The next wanted to cook me dinner, yeah right, it was a way to get to go home with him...and third was just weird

Drowned Out

Lauri wrote:

I think in general anyone who makes demands about who you should or shouldn't be to contact them is out. If a guy who possesses characteristics I am not looking for emails me, I just don't write back. It's not up to me preemptively rule out certain people. That to me is just really negative. Write what you ARE looking for, but don't write what you're NOT looking for. We all have things are turn on and turn offs but making demands in your profile is just...ugh. A lot of people make physical demands which is ridiculous. Like "sorry but if you are overweight don't write to me." I'm sorry but putting that in your profile just makes you come off as a shallow jerk, and it does no good. Is it really THAT much skin off your back if someone who doesn't meet your physical standards dares to write to you? Like you are so turned off by everyone who does not meet what your personal standard happens to be that you can't even stand to have them turn up in your inbox. Everyone has the right to write to whomever they want to and then it's up to the recipient to determine if they want to write back.

and also with these people who make these demands about height and weight or whatever...it's like they expect everyone else to have the same standard of what they consider "short" or "overweight." It's like some person of the opposite sex might have wanted to write to them, but then this statement puts doubt in their head like, "well I don't think I'm really overweight, but this guy might be judging from Ralph Lauren standards..." but more likely they won't write because now they know what kind of an idiot you are.

Although that being said I add at the end of my profile to please not contact me if you are racist or sexist. I think these people know who they are.

totally agree with all of that. Negativity is a huge turn off. I met one woman who had a height provision in her profile...she then proceeded to complain that she got a ton of hate mail over it....I asked her why she left it on the profile...she couldn't give me an answer, aside from "I'm just telling the truth"....well....so are the people sending the hate mail

ReachingForThinAir

i like long moonlit walks on the beach ....oh.. and Pearl Jam.

actually :? in my Yahoo profile, i mention NYC, Amsterdam and Pearl Jam.

other than a bit of crazy prose, that's about it.

oh and some pictures of when i was 25. :ugeek:

soulsinging

Lauri wrote:

Drowned Out wrote:

For me, #2 would be any variation of screen name that incorporates the word 'princess'. You are not a contestant on The Bachelor. Deal with it.
Also, anyone who lists shopping as an interest gets red flagged instantly....
And...I'm wary of anyone that goes on and on about 'if you're a player, liar or cheat, don't bother - I'm not looking for one night stands, so if that's you blah blah blah.....'.....do these women really think a guy that is willing to lie and cheat for sex is going to read that and go 'DAMNIT, I thought she'd be down...oh, and she's not looking for players, this just isn't gonna work out'....?? Those statements have 'issues' written all over them...if she's already bitching and THAT suspicious, can you imagine a relationship with her!?

I think in general anyone who makes demands about who you should or shouldn't be to contact them is out. If a guy who possesses characteristics I am not looking for emails me, I just don't write back. It's not up to me preemptively rule out certain people. That to me is just really negative. Write what you ARE looking for, but don't write what you're NOT looking for. We all have things are turn on and turn offs but making demands in your profile is just...ugh. A lot of people make physical demands which is ridiculous. Like "sorry but if you are overweight don't write to me." I'm sorry but putting that in your profile just makes you come off as a shallow jerk, and it does no good. Is it really THAT much skin off your back if someone who doesn't meet your physical standards dares to write to you? Like you are so turned off by everyone who does not meet what your personal standard happens to be that you can't even stand to have them turn up in your inbox. Everyone has the right to write to whomever they want to and then it's up to the recipient to determine if they want to write back.

and also with these people who make these demands about height and weight or whatever...it's like they expect everyone else to have the same standard of what they consider "short" or "overweight." It's like some person of the opposite sex might have wanted to write to them, but then this statement puts doubt in their head like, "well I don't think I'm really overweight, but this guy might be judging from Ralph Lauren standards..." but more likely they won't write because now they know what kind of an idiot you are.

Although that being said I add at the end of my profile to please not contact me if you are racist or sexist. I think these people know who they are.

Why did you put that in the end? Using your logic of a paragraph before, can't you just not respond?

As to the height/weight thing... i think people do that to basically say "looks matter to me so it's a wsate of your time trying to contact me." I don't think they give a shit who responds, they just don't want to end up on a date with some girl they know through a myspace angle photo and have it be awkward and hurtful for them.

Ms. Haiku

I tried to be as true to myself on my online dating profile, and I may have come off as a little goofy or quirky, or odd. I did mention Pearl Jam, and I may have mentioned my tenclub #

It's been a while since I was online dating, but I tried to add a little humor. That I remember.

norm

Whizbang wrote:

I agree, if you want it to work, you have to weed through a lot of BS...including men who love to hear themselves talk and constantly interrupt you to change the subject to where they worked or how much they hate their mother, claim to be Sir Lancelot looking for his Queen (asking if I was willing to be said Queen), men who ask if a girlfriend in one of my photos was available if I wasn't interested, men who claim to want an independent woman but are indignant when you offer to pay your own way for dinner (quite possibly the same men who then complain women only want men to pay for everything). Even better is the man who is suddenly insulted that, if it gets to the point of a physical relationship, you are actually responsible enough to have condoms. I find that though some men claim to be attracted to a woman who is quite capable of living on her own without "needing" a man are threatened by that and seek to change it.

i know you're not making this up but i wish you did sad part is there must be girls that fall for that shit :roll:

Whizbang wrote:

That could very well be my deep seeded reason - I love my independence, love who I am. I rebel against anyone who threatens that.

:thumbup: :thumbup:

Lauri

soulsinging wrote:

Why did you put that in the end? Using your logic of a paragraph before, can't you just not respond?

Yeah I agree. But I might not be able to tell that from an initial email or profile, and I feel that these are things that are worth not being exposed to. I don't know, I've thought I should take it off, I just haven't gotten around to it. But on the other hand, if I show up on a date and the guy doesn't look as good as photo, no big deal-it's still a nice night out. If I show up on a date and have to listen to racist comments, I'm going to be pissed. But in terms of the height/weight thing, I mean come on. Like I said, how would one even know what you consider "fat" or whatever? I know people who have extreme opinions on both ends. And height you'd think people would be clear about if they were going to be that exclusive, but they're usually not. I've seen girls write, "no short guys please." Well what is short? And honestly what difference does it make if you get an "angled photo" of someone and then they don't look as good? What is that anymore awkward than showing up for the date and realizing you're not into them because they're totally stupid or bitchy or you're just not attracted to them for no identifiable reason? It's not any different. That leads me to believe that people put those things on there to somehow make themselves seem better.

Cinnamon Girl

I was just told that my profile was "exhaustively long" by some guy who commented on my love for pearl jam: "They're ok."

Honest opinion I suppose.

Lauri

Cinnamon Girl wrote:

I was just told that my profile was "exhaustively long" by some guy who commented on my love for pearl jam: "They're ok."

Honest opinion I suppose.

at least he didn't say, "I liked them in 1992. They're still together?"

vital5

He who looks may never find what they are seeking...

Confucius2009 says - He who uses online dating sites will end up with the hands he types his profile with...

Lauri

Another downfall of online dating- I've been chatting with this one guy for like over month. Could never figure out why he never really asked me out other than vaguely mentioning that if I find myself going to the local movie theater we should meet up. He just sends me an email this morning saying that he's been seeing some girl who's really into him but he'll "still go to a movie" with me. Seriously, wtf.

JonnyPistachio

Lauri wrote:

Cinnamon Girl wrote:

I was just told that my profile was "exhaustively long" by some guy who commented on my love for pearl jam: "They're ok."

Honest opinion I suppose.

at least he didn't say, "I liked them in 1992. They're still together?"

...the little things impress me. I like that you know how to use they're, their, and there.

locked

Lauri wrote:

Another downfall of online dating- I've been chatting with this one guy for like over month. Could never figure out why he never really asked me out other than vaguely mentioning that if I find myself going to the local movie theater we should meet up. He just sends me an email this morning saying that he's been seeing some girl who's really into him but he'll "still go to a movie" with me. Seriously, wtf.

I thought all women were attracted to the "bad boy"/ "wolves" who treated them like crap..

isn't that the lesson all us "nice guys" have learned?

(ducks for cover!)

really, you know the character John Cusack plays in the movie "High Fidelity"?

That's me ....and I lose out to men with tatoos /on probation/ with no bank account all the time lately....

(writes memo to self.. NEED TO FIND A PJ GIRL)
:roll:

Lauri

locked wrote:

Lauri wrote:

Another downfall of online dating- I've been chatting with this one guy for like over month. Could never figure out why he never really asked me out other than vaguely mentioning that if I find myself going to the local movie theater we should meet up. He just sends me an email this morning saying that he's been seeing some girl who's really into him but he'll "still go to a movie" with me. Seriously, wtf.

I thought all women were attracted to the "bad boy"/ "wolves" who treated them like crap..

isn't that the lesson all us "nice guys" have learned?

(ducks for cover!)

really, you know the character John Cusack plays in the movie "High Fidelity"?

That's me ....and I lose out to men with tatoos /on probation/ with no bank account all the time lately....

(writes memo to self.. NEED TO FIND A PJ GIRL)
:roll:

oh this guy was far from a bad boy. It was just a really weird message. I guess he was just holding out to see where it went with this chick and when he decided she was good to go...but I think he like wants to be friends or something...like we can go out but it's not date...that's exactly what I want to with guys I don't know who have girlfriends!

soulsinging

locked wrote:

I thought all women were attracted to the "bad boy"/ "wolves" who treated them like crap..

isn't that the lesson all us "nice guys" have learned?

(ducks for cover!)

really, you know the character John Cusack plays in the movie "High Fidelity"?

That's me ....and I lose out to men with tatoos /on probation/ with no bank account all the time lately....

(writes memo to self.. NEED TO FIND A PJ GIRL)
:roll:

As we speak, I'm losing out to a 19 year old high school drop out that has openly told her he has a gf and she's just his road tail, all becos he has tats and plays in a mediocre punk band... I guess even by age 25-26 that's way hotter to chicks than a guy with a stable job that actually likes and respects HER, not just the sex he can get from her.

soulsinging

Lauri wrote:

locked wrote:

Lauri wrote:

Another downfall of online dating- I've been chatting with this one guy for like over month. Could never figure out why he never really asked me out other than vaguely mentioning that if I find myself going to the local movie theater we should meet up. He just sends me an email this morning saying that he's been seeing some girl who's really into him but he'll "still go to a movie" with me. Seriously, wtf.

I thought all women were attracted to the "bad boy"/ "wolves" who treated them like crap..

isn't that the lesson all us "nice guys" have learned?

(ducks for cover!)

really, you know the character John Cusack plays in the movie "High Fidelity"?

That's me ....and I lose out to men with tatoos /on probation/ with no bank account all the time lately....

(writes memo to self.. NEED TO FIND A PJ GIRL)
:roll:

oh this guy was far from a bad boy. It was just a really weird message. I guess he was just holding out to see where it went with this chick and when he decided she was good to go...but I think he like wants to be friends or something...like we can go out but it's not date...that's exactly what I want to with guys I don't know who have girlfriends!

Who says she's his gf? Maybe they're not exclusive yet and he still does want to see you, but felt like he should be honest about not committing to anyone right now so you don't expect that he's not seeing anyone else when he is. But it's still a weird message... like "she's really into me, so you better bring your a-game!"