What is it like to be attractive?

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  • AmentsChickAmentsChick Posts: 6,969
    bee_boy wrote:
    JordyWordy wrote:
    a bit of self-confidence is attractive. (in moderation)

    This is so true. Ugly people like me can become attractive with a bit of self-confidence. When going out, just say to yourself that you have nothing to envy those dudes/girls (which is true). Trust me, you can be hotter than you think.

    Very well said, bee boy.
    This is the greatest band in the world -- Ben Harper

  • Heineken HelenHeineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    iluvcats wrote:
    It's strange for her friends too... I used to get chatted up MUCH more when I was out with her... and some of them made it quite obvious that it was just to get closer to her :mrgreen:

    oh bullshit. I think you are attractive, Helen.
    :mrgreen: awww thank you... nah, I didn't mean it like that. I'm not low in confidence... I look how I look and that's that :mrgreen: if I don't like it, it's not gonna make me look any better :mrgreen:

    Just that it really was very obvious and it was very funny and strange seeing how men acted around her :shock:
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
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    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you
  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    beauty is in the eye of the beholder...who says you aren't attractive? You are being too hard on yourself..there is more to attraction then outer beauty. I have met gorgeous people who were the most stuck up and had the shittiest attitudes. Look aren't everything. I choose not to put my pic on avatar because I don't need validation of my attractiveness and Im not about that. Now I don't mean to imply people who display pics are looking for praise or validation..im just saying I personally don't need to do it. :)
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    Max Reede: "My teacher tells me beauty is on the inside."
    Fletcher: "That's just something ugly people say."
  • bee_boybee_boy Posts: 384
    To be really honest, I think there's 3 kinds of people in the world:

    - Those who are beautiful on the inside
    - Those who are beautiful on the outside
    - Those who are reversible, like me :D

    Now, how's that for self-confidence ;)
  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    bee_boy wrote:
    To be really honest, I think there's 3 kinds of people in the world:

    - Those who are beautiful on the inside
    - Those who are beautiful on the outside
    - Those who are reversible, like me :D

    Now, how's that for self-confidence ;)

    reversible? I never heard that one before :). good for you...it's really about having confidence.
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • gvn2fly74 wrote:
    single and lonely or married and bored thats what it comes down to.


    haha chris rock - i always loved that remark :)

    and in my opinion, good looks are overrated. it's what's inside the person - not out. even the supermodels get screwed over and cheated on. looks are not everything. i much rather have a great, loving man, than a guy who turns heads when i walk in the room with them.

    Honey he likes baseball.. I like baseball... Do you like baseball ? :lol::lol::lol:
  • kenny olavkenny olav Posts: 3,319
    So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    Kenny Olav wrote:
    So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

    Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.
  • __ Posts: 6,651
    Kenny Olav wrote:
    So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

    Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.

    Not that I don't think Eddie Vedder is crazy-fucking-hot, but I think it's the charisma that's more important than being handsome. For many years (before I hung around places like this), I didn't even remember what he looked like - but I still found him attractive.

    Regarding the importance of confidence, I prefer guys who have just enough of it to break out of their shell. Cockiness is a huge turn off, for me anyway.
  • South of SeattleSouth of Seattle West Seattle Posts: 10,724
    Kenny Olav wrote:
    So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

    Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.

    I don't think Cobain would really be considered attractive would he? I think he was just an enigma and odd personality.
    NERDS!
  • in_hiding79in_hiding79 Posts: 4,315
    Kenny Olav wrote:
    So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?


    It's all about the music... :!:
    And so the lion fell in love with the lamb...,"
    "What a stupid lamb."
    "What a sick, masochistic lion."
  • PJGARDENPJGARDEN Posts: 1,484
    Kenny Olav wrote:
    So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

    Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.

    Well first of all, I for one think Mark Lanegan is sexy as hell. But what about AIC?? I don't think Layne was that great looking but they made it. I really don't think the reason these bands were big was b/c their good looking lead singers. Charisma maybe but I don't think looks had much to do with it. People loved the music b/c they felt they could relate. If it was about the "look'" I don't think the music would have meant as much to people as it did.
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    PJGARDEN wrote:
    Kenny Olav wrote:
    So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

    Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.

    Well first of all, I for one think Mark Lanegan is sexy as hell. But what about AIC?? I don't think Layne was that great looking but they made it. I really don't think the reason these bands were big was b/c their good looking lead singers. Charisma maybe but I don't think looks had much to do with it. People loved the music b/c they felt they could relate. If it was about the "look'" I don't think the music would have meant as much to people as it did.

    Bullshit. It's all tied together. Grunge fashion was all the rage in those days... everyone buying flannel and boots to look like Ed. If you think he wasn't hanging up in lockers all over the country the way junior high girls now have the Jonas Brothers or that guy from the Twilight movie then you're mistaken. Yes, those guys had success and plenty of other bands did too. But PJ outsold them all. And I can assure you that the fact that he had good looks to go with those golden pipes didn't hurt them any. You have to have talent to back it up and sustain it (lookin at you Gavin Rossdale), but Ed was a teen idol. Period.

    Also, in 10-15 years some of these emo bands will have survived and their fans will be on holograph boards having saying the same things about their favorites... Fall Out Boy was never tied to image or being cute! It was all about how the music resonated with us!
  • __ Posts: 6,651
    Bullshit. It's all tied together. Grunge fashion was all the rage in those days... everyone buying flannel and boots to look like Ed. If you think he wasn't hanging up in lockers all over the country the way junior high girls now have the Jonas Brothers or that guy from the Twilight movie then you're mistaken. Yes, those guys had success and plenty of other bands did too. But PJ outsold them all. And I can assure you that the fact that he had good looks to go with those golden pipes didn't hurt them any. You have to have talent to back it up and sustain it (lookin at you Gavin Rossdale), but Ed was a teen idol. Period.

    Also, in 10-15 years some of these emo bands will have survived and their fans will be on holograph boards having saying the same things about their favorites... Fall Out Boy was never tied to image or being cute! It was all about how the music resonated with us!

    "Image" - such as the grunge look - is different than "being cute".
  • PJGARDENPJGARDEN Posts: 1,484
    PJGARDEN wrote:

    Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.

    Well first of all, I for one think Mark Lanegan is sexy as hell. But what about AIC?? I don't think Layne was that great looking but they made it. I really don't think the reason these bands were big was b/c their good looking lead singers. Charisma maybe but I don't think looks had much to do with it. People loved the music b/c they felt they could relate. If it was about the "look'" I don't think the music would have meant as much to people as it did.

    Bullshit. It's all tied together. Grunge fashion was all the rage in those days... everyone buying flannel and boots to look like Ed. If you think he wasn't hanging up in lockers all over the country the way junior high girls now have the Jonas Brothers or that guy from the Twilight movie then you're mistaken. Yes, those guys had success and plenty of other bands did too. But PJ outsold them all. And I can assure you that the fact that he had good looks to go with those golden pipes didn't hurt them any. You have to have talent to back it up and sustain it (lookin at you Gavin Rossdale), but Ed was a teen idol. Period.

    Also, in 10-15 years some of these emo bands will have survived and their fans will be on holograph boards having saying the same things about their favorites... Fall Out Boy was never tied to image or being cute! It was all about how the music resonated with us!

    I still don't think they're looks had much to do with the success. Cobain wasn't all that great looking and I don't think Vedder had/ has jaw dropping good looks either. Both were decent looking but very normal looking guys. Cornell is very good looking but with that voice he would have made it regardless. Like I said, I think they're charisma had a lot to do with their success but that has nothing to do with looks. The most charismatic people I have ever met were not all that good looking.
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    scb wrote:
    Bullshit. It's all tied together. Grunge fashion was all the rage in those days... everyone buying flannel and boots to look like Ed. If you think he wasn't hanging up in lockers all over the country the way junior high girls now have the Jonas Brothers or that guy from the Twilight movie then you're mistaken. Yes, those guys had success and plenty of other bands did too. But PJ outsold them all. And I can assure you that the fact that he had good looks to go with those golden pipes didn't hurt them any. You have to have talent to back it up and sustain it (lookin at you Gavin Rossdale), but Ed was a teen idol. Period.

    Also, in 10-15 years some of these emo bands will have survived and their fans will be on holograph boards having saying the same things about their favorites... Fall Out Boy was never tied to image or being cute! It was all about how the music resonated with us!

    "Image" - such as the grunge look - is different than "being cute".

    Indeed it is. But regardless of that, society looks to the beautiful to set fashion. Ed was a teen idol, you can't deny it. He never played up to it or was comfortable with it, but there's a reason Weird Al wrote that song about his gf being in love with Ed... NOT Mark Lanegan. Grunge was hot, Ed's picture was everywhere, including the trapper keepers of the early 90s teeny-boppers, and grunge fashion took off. PJ outsold every other band by miles, and Ed was a big part of that... if he looked like this guy:

    http://ogami.subpop.com/history/tad/tad-press1.gif

    No way does PJ sell half as many albums or reach anywhere near the level of popularity they did.
  • Dylan StoneDylan Stone Posts: 1,145
    Kenny Olav wrote:
    So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

    Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.

    I don't think Cobain would really be considered attractive would he? I think he was just an enigma and odd personality.

    No... I wasn't even really "into" Nirvana... and i always... from like the first time i saw those piercing eyes...i always thought Kurt was beautiful (just usually would have benefitted from a little clean up ;) )
  • __ Posts: 6,651
    Indeed it is. But regardless of that, society looks to the beautiful to set fashion. Ed was a teen idol, you can't deny it. He never played up to it or was comfortable with it, but there's a reason Weird Al wrote that song about his gf being in love with Ed... NOT Mark Lanegan. Grunge was hot, Ed's picture was everywhere, including the trapper keepers of the early 90s teeny-boppers, and grunge fashion took off. PJ outsold every other band by miles, and Ed was a big part of that... if he looked like this guy:

    http://ogami.subpop.com/history/tad/tad-press1.gif

    No way does PJ sell half as many albums or reach anywhere near the level of popularity they did.

    I'm sorry... have you ever actually HEARD Pearl Jam?? Their music is amazing - in part due to Ed's charisma - so maybe that's why he was a teen idol and had his picture in trapper keepers ( :lol: trapper keepers :lol: ). I'm not arguing against Ed being hot... I think Weird Al was right to write that song about him. I mean, good god damn he's hot!! (Although, when making that assessment, it's really hard to separate his looks from the other characteristics that make him attractive.) But, as I said before, I didn't even know/remember that about him until relatively recently, so that's certainly not the reason I'm a fan... it's just the icing on the cake.
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    scb wrote:
    I'm sorry... have you ever actually HEARD Pearl Jam?? Their music is amazing - in part due to Ed's charisma - so maybe that's why he was a teen idol and had his picture in trapper keepers ( :lol: trapper keepers :lol: ). I'm not arguing against Ed being hot... I think Weird Al was right to write that song about him. I mean, good god damn he's hot!! (Although, when making that assessment, it's really hard to separate his looks from the other characteristics that make him attractive.) But, as I said before, I didn't even know/remember that about him until relatively recently, so that's certainly not the reason I'm a fan... it's just the icing on the cake.

    I'm not saying it's the reason you are a fan, I'm saying it's part of the reason why the band outsold every other grunge band by millions and became the biggest band of the 90s. And yes, there's more to it than looks, but those helped. Jeff Tweedy is similar to Ed in terms of personality, but he'll never grace magazines like Ed did, even when Wilco was the it-band in the late 90s. Sex appeal has always gone hand in hand with popular music.
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Well, I got my ass grabbed 3 times this weekend.
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    scb wrote:
    I'm sorry... have you ever actually HEARD Pearl Jam?? Their music is amazing - in part due to Ed's charisma - so maybe that's why he was a teen idol and had his picture in trapper keepers ( :lol: trapper keepers :lol: ). I'm not arguing against Ed being hot... I think Weird Al was right to write that song about him. I mean, good god damn he's hot!! (Although, when making that assessment, it's really hard to separate his looks from the other characteristics that make him attractive.) But, as I said before, I didn't even know/remember that about him until relatively recently, so that's certainly not the reason I'm a fan... it's just the icing on the cake.

    I'm not saying it's the reason you are a fan, I'm saying it's part of the reason why the band outsold every other grunge band by millions and became the biggest band of the 90s. And yes, there's more to it than looks, but those helped. Jeff Tweedy is similar to Ed in terms of personality, but he'll never grace magazines like Ed did, even when Wilco was the it-band in the late 90s. Sex appeal has always gone hand in hand with popular music.
    99.9% of people I know don't even know what Eddie Vedder looks like, but know who Pearl Jam is.

    I think you are right to a degree, but not enough.
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Great, I just killed another thread!


    8-)
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    99.9% of people I know don't even know what Eddie Vedder looks like, but know who Pearl Jam is.

    I think you are right to a degree, but not enough.

    I don't know if I believe that. I think if you showed them a picture of him at PinkPop in 92 or something, they'd recognize who he is. Unless they're too young to have grown up then.
  • stickfig13stickfig13 Posts: 1,532
    Keiran wrote:
    I guess the title pretty much says it all.

    I'm asking because after seeing everyone's avatars, I think there are some very nice looking folks on this board. And I was just wondering, what is it like to know that other people find you pretty or handsome?

    What is it like to know that you have the whole package - an attractive face, an inviting smile, a pleasing looking body? That you are thought of as attractive without having to use your personality, humor, etc. What does it make you feel like when you know someone has only seen you and is thinking "Wow!"

    I only ask because I'll never know. I'm one of those people who you find things to like after getting to know me. For example I have nice eyes, and that's about it. Or my personality allows you to overlook or ignore my physical short comings.

    I'm sorry if this comes off stupid or superficial, I didn't intend for it to. I guess the question is the result of staring in the mirror a bit too long before showering and an extra glass of wine (or 2).

    God... it's so awesome!

    I'm seriously the best looking dude I know. Everyday I wake up and look in the mirror and think what would the world do without someone as good looking as me.

    ;)
    Sacramento 10-30-00, Bridge School 10-20 and 10-21-01, Bridge School 10-25 and 10-26-01, Irvine 06-02-03, Irvine 06-03-03, San Diego 06-05-03, San Diego 07-07-06, Los Angeles 07-09-06, Santa Barbara 07-13-06, London UK 06-18-07, San Diego 10-9-09, San Diego 2013, LA 1 2013
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    99.9% of people I know don't even know what Eddie Vedder looks like, but know who Pearl Jam is.

    I think you are right to a degree, but not enough.

    I don't know if I believe that. I think if you showed them a picture of him at PinkPop in 92 or something, they'd recognize who he is. Unless they're too young to have grown up then.
    I suppose. I'm sure his looks helped sell the band.. I still think they would have been pretty big regardless. Maybe not. Maybe they wouldn't have gotten as much promotion.
  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    99.9% of people I know don't even know what Eddie Vedder looks like, but know who Pearl Jam is.

    I think you are right to a degree, but not enough.

    I don't know if I believe that. I think if you showed them a picture of him at PinkPop in 92 or something, they'd recognize who he is. Unless they're too young to have grown up then.
    I suppose. I'm sure his looks helped sell the band.. I still think they would have been pretty big regardless. Maybe not. Maybe they wouldn't have gotten as much promotion.

    Probably. Like I said, it wasn't the whole story, but I definitely think the band's success was helped by the fact they they had a very photogenic lead singer who also happened to have a phenomenal voice and great stage presence. The Doors had the same thing... there's no knocking the musicianship or songwriting of the other members of either band, but let's be real, both are defined, in the public eye at least, by their singers... who were both considered incredibly hot in addition to being incredibly talented.
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718

    Probably. Like I said, it wasn't the whole story, but I definitely think the band's success was helped by the fact they they had a very photogenic lead singer who also happened to have a phenomenal voice and great stage presence. The Doors had the same thing... there's no knocking the musicianship or songwriting of the other members of either band, but let's be real, both are defined, in the public eye at least, by their singers... who were both considered incredibly hot in addition to being incredibly talented.


    You're right. The more I think about it.. Of course, Tool got pretty big and to this day I don't know what the hell that guy looks like.
  • Thorns2010Thorns2010 Posts: 2,201

    Probably. Like I said, it wasn't the whole story, but I definitely think the band's success was helped by the fact they they had a very photogenic lead singer who also happened to have a phenomenal voice and great stage presence. The Doors had the same thing... there's no knocking the musicianship or songwriting of the other members of either band, but let's be real, both are defined, in the public eye at least, by their singers... who were both considered incredibly hot in addition to being incredibly talented.


    You're right. The more I think about it.. Of course, Tool got pretty big and to this day I don't know what the hell that guy looks like.

    While Tool is a good band, and were/are 'big' They have come no where near the heights of the 'grunge' bands, let alone Pearl Jam.
  • LikeAnOceanLikeAnOcean Posts: 7,718
    Thorns2010 wrote:

    Probably. Like I said, it wasn't the whole story, but I definitely think the band's success was helped by the fact they they had a very photogenic lead singer who also happened to have a phenomenal voice and great stage presence. The Doors had the same thing... there's no knocking the musicianship or songwriting of the other members of either band, but let's be real, both are defined, in the public eye at least, by their singers... who were both considered incredibly hot in addition to being incredibly talented.


    You're right. The more I think about it.. Of course, Tool got pretty big and to this day I don't know what the hell that guy looks like.

    While Tool is a good band, and were/are 'big' They have come no where near the heights of the 'grunge' bands, let alone Pearl Jam.
    suppose.. sucks they sell better now though.
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