What is it like to be attractive?

Drowned Out

Heineken Helen wrote:

I've a friend who's stunningly beautiful... the kinda beauty that even intimidated my brothers army friends who are unintimidateable. It was funny seeing how they behave around her. But she was single and she told me she was actually miserable because of it. Guys rarely approached her cos she was so gorgeous... and when they did, it was only to chat her up so she'd only get the OVER confident guys talking to her. It's strange, I guess, maybe like being rich... people behave differently cos you have money... either cos they want it, cos they're jealous or cos they're trying NOT to seem like they want it but it's really what they want

She's such a lovely person though and it's actually really getting her down :oops: oh and, I'm not talking about her being simply attractive... she's stunningly beautiful.

It's strange for her friends too... I used to get chatted up MUCH more when I was out with her... and some of them made it quite obvious that it was just to get closer to her

I never understand the whole 'too attractive to approach' thing...I've had women tell me this before and it comes across as soooo egotistical to me.
So your friend sits there, knowing how hot she is, feeling sorry for herself that no one is hitting on her? I don't get it....I'm sure all it would take is a two second fuck-me-eyes glance, or a little wave gesture and any guy she was interested in would come running. ....I think a lot of beautiful women have a way (intentional or not) of making themselve unapproachable. The majority of the people in the world (women included ), need to do SOMETHING to attract the opposite sex....body language, eye contact, whatever...whenever people say that, it sounds to me like they expect guys to fall all over them while they admire their manicure or check their texts.

iluvcats

Heineken Helen wrote:

It's strange for her friends too... I used to get chatted up MUCH more when I was out with her... and some of them made it quite obvious that it was just to get closer to her

oh bullshit. I think you are attractive, Helen.

iluvcats

I don't understand what drowned out said in the beginning of his reply.

Have women told him that they feel he is too attractive to approach? If so, we need pics to help you decide.

soulsinging

Drowned Out wrote:

Heineken Helen wrote:

I've a friend who's stunningly beautiful... the kinda beauty that even intimidated my brothers army friends who are unintimidateable. It was funny seeing how they behave around her. But she was single and she told me she was actually miserable because of it. Guys rarely approached her cos she was so gorgeous... and when they did, it was only to chat her up so she'd only get the OVER confident guys talking to her. It's strange, I guess, maybe like being rich... people behave differently cos you have money... either cos they want it, cos they're jealous or cos they're trying NOT to seem like they want it but it's really what they want

She's such a lovely person though and it's actually really getting her down :oops: oh and, I'm not talking about her being simply attractive... she's stunningly beautiful.

It's strange for her friends too... I used to get chatted up MUCH more when I was out with her... and some of them made it quite obvious that it was just to get closer to her

I never understand the whole 'too attractive to approach' thing...I've had women tell me this before and it comes across as soooo egotistical to me.
So your friend sits there, knowing how hot she is, feeling sorry for herself that no one is hitting on her? I don't get it....I'm sure all it would take is a two second fuck-me-eyes glance, or a little wave gesture and any guy she was interested in would come running. ....I think a lot of beautiful women have a way (intentional or not) of making themselve unapproachable. The majority of the people in the world (women included ), need to do SOMETHING to attract the opposite sex....body language, eye contact, whatever...whenever people say that, it sounds to me like they expect guys to fall all over them while they admire their manicure or check their texts.

I'm guessing they learn very early on not to do this lest they 1) get labeled a tease and 2) end up having a otn of guys slobbering on them and being annoyingly stalkerish.

Drowned Out

soulsinging wrote:

I'm guessing they learn very early on not to do this lest they 1) get labeled a tease and 2) end up having a otn of guys slobbering on them and being annoyingly stalkerish.

Can't have your slobbering, annoyingly stalkerish guys and eat them too.

in_hiding79

Drowned Out wrote:

soulsinging wrote:

I'm guessing they learn very early on not to do this lest they 1) get labeled a tease and 2) end up having a otn of guys slobbering on them and being annoyingly stalkerish.

Can't have your slobbering, annoyingly stalkerish guys and eat them too.

Drowned Out

iluvcats wrote:

I don't understand what drowned out said in the beginning of his reply.

Have women told him that they feel he is too attractive to approach? If so, we need pics to help you decide.

oops, missed this.
nah, I wish.
I was saying that female friends of mine have given me the whole 'it's a curse being beautiful' speech before.

( @ Pam)

Thorns2010

soulsinging wrote:

Heineken Helen wrote:

I've a friend who's stunningly beautiful... the kinda beauty that even intimidated my brothers army friends who are unintimidateable. It was funny seeing how they behave around her. But she was single and she told me she was actually miserable because of it. Guys rarely approached her cos she was so gorgeous... and when they did, it was only to chat her up so she'd only get the OVER confident guys talking to her. It's strange, I guess, maybe like being rich... people behave differently cos you have money... either cos they want it, cos they're jealous or cos they're trying NOT to seem like they want it but it's really what they want

She's such a lovely person though and it's actually really getting her down :oops: oh and, I'm not talking about her being simply attractive... she's stunningly beautiful.

It's strange for her friends too... I used to get chatted up MUCH more when I was out with her... and some of them made it quite obvious that it was just to get closer to her

Well if you two ever get in a fight and you want a dirty way to get back at her, you know who to set her up with!

You're suggesting she set her friend up with Speedy then huh?

iluvcats

Drowned Out wrote:

iluvcats wrote:

I don't understand what drowned out said in the beginning of his reply.

Have women told him that they feel he is too attractive to approach? If so, we need pics to help you decide.

oops, missed this.
nah, I wish.
I was saying that female friends of mine have given me the whole 'it's a curse being beautiful' speech before.

( @ Pam)

your friends told you that they are beautiful? wow...not too modest, huh?



I like beautiful people like eddie vedder; he seems pretty both inside and out. When he's an old geezer and wrinkled, he'll still be a good guy

bee_boy

JordyWordy wrote:

a bit of self-confidence is attractive. (in moderation)

This is so true. Ugly people like me can become attractive with a bit of self-confidence. When going out, just say to yourself that you have nothing to envy those dudes/girls (which is true). Trust me, you can be hotter than you think.

AmentsChick

bee_boy wrote:

JordyWordy wrote:

a bit of self-confidence is attractive. (in moderation)

This is so true. Ugly people like me can become attractive with a bit of self-confidence. When going out, just say to yourself that you have nothing to envy those dudes/girls (which is true). Trust me, you can be hotter than you think.

Very well said, bee boy.

Heineken Helen

iluvcats wrote:

Heineken Helen wrote:

It's strange for her friends too... I used to get chatted up MUCH more when I was out with her... and some of them made it quite obvious that it was just to get closer to her

oh bullshit. I think you are attractive, Helen.

awww thank you... nah, I didn't mean it like that. I'm not low in confidence... I look how I look and that's that if I don't like it, it's not gonna make me look any better

Just that it really was very obvious and it was very funny and strange seeing how men acted around her :shock:

libragirl

beauty is in the eye of the beholder...who says you aren't attractive? You are being too hard on yourself..there is more to attraction then outer beauty. I have met gorgeous people who were the most stuck up and had the shittiest attitudes. Look aren't everything. I choose not to put my pic on avatar because I don't need validation of my attractiveness and Im not about that. Now I don't mean to imply people who display pics are looking for praise or validation..im just saying I personally don't need to do it.

soulsinging

Max Reede: "My teacher tells me beauty is on the inside."
Fletcher: "That's just something ugly people say."

bee_boy

To be really honest, I think there's 3 kinds of people in the world:

- Those who are beautiful on the inside
- Those who are beautiful on the outside
- Those who are reversible, like me

Now, how's that for self-confidence

libragirl

bee_boy wrote:

To be really honest, I think there's 3 kinds of people in the world:

- Those who are beautiful on the inside
- Those who are beautiful on the outside
- Those who are reversible, like me

Now, how's that for self-confidence

reversible? I never heard that one before . good for you...it's really about having confidence.

WaveCameCrashin

edvedder913 wrote:

gvn2fly74 wrote:

single and lonely or married and bored thats what it comes down to.

haha chris rock - i always loved that remark

and in my opinion, good looks are overrated. it's what's inside the person - not out. even the supermodels get screwed over and cheated on. looks are not everything. i much rather have a great, loving man, than a guy who turns heads when i walk in the room with them.

Honey he likes baseball.. I like baseball... Do you like baseball ?

kenny olav

So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

soulsinging

Kenny Olav wrote:

So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.

_

soulsinging wrote:

Kenny Olav wrote:

So if Eddie Vedder looked like Geddy Lee how many of us would be here?

Or, for a better comparison, what if he looked like Mark Lanegan? One interestin thing the big 3 Seattle bands all had in common (nirvana, soundgarden, pj) was a handsome and incredibly charismatic lead singer. Screaming Trees, Candlebox, Mudhoney... the ones that actually looked like scruffy northwestern lumberjacks... all disappeared pretty quick.

Not that I don't think Eddie Vedder is crazy-fucking-hot, but I think it's the charisma that's more important than being handsome. For many years (before I hung around places like this), I didn't even remember what he looked like - but I still found him attractive.

Regarding the importance of confidence, I prefer guys who have just enough of it to break out of their shell. Cockiness is a huge turn off, for me anyway.