How to Trick a Christian

Strangest Tribe
Strangest Tribe Posts: 2,502
edited December 2007 in All Encompassing Trip
No harm or ill will meant by this thread, but I have done this on more than one occasion and it usually happens this time of year with curious outcomes.

Last week myself and an elderly friend (Frank) were traveling and pulled into a service station for gas and supplies. As we entered the parking lot, a transient young man and his dog had one of those cardboard signs proclaiming

"holiday traveler... needing food and money for holiday trip home."

As we pulled in to the pumps my friend says "looks like a healthy young man to me...he should have a job...cut his beard and hair...guess he thinks the world owes him"

I'm Thinking Chris McCandless so I go over and give the guy a few $$ and pet his dog, make small talk, (he's headed to Charleston, SC) and I'm located in the Midwest. So I wish him luck and head inside to pay.

When I get inside my friend says "you give him money?"

"Yeah, worried about his dog"

he says ..."yeah, you know he has to feed his dog"

I thought about it for a minute and said..."Frank...aren't you Baptist?"

"Yeah"

Well, I said ..."That young man could be Jesus and I think it's funny that I have no religious connections and here I go offering him a few bucks and you have already passed judgement on him...just sayin..."

Frank kinda grumbled and made that "matter-of -fact" facial expression and paid for his coke and hot dog.

I was two people behind Frank in line with my Coke and hotdog and had to also settle up on the gas.

When I was finished paying, I'm walking out to the truck and happen to notice Frank was over laughing and cutting up with the our transient young man.

So I wait for him to get back to the truck and I asked him.."did you give him any money?"

Frank said "Yeah $5...seemed like a good kid"
the Minions
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • daystar143
    daystar143 Posts: 367
    Because we all need to be reminded that each of us has the opportunity to entertain angels unaware.
    The Daystar

    "But --you say that Dreams have no power here? Tell me, Lucifer Morningstar...Ask yourselves, all of you...What power would hell have if those here imprisoned were not able to Dream of Heaven?" Dream speaking to Lucifer as written by Neil Gaiman.
  • GreenTeaDisease
    GreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    how could he be jesus? he died 2000 years ago.
  • in_hiding79
    in_hiding79 Posts: 4,315
    I'm atheist! I don't believe in God, or Jesus, or Allah, or Buda or anything that claims too be magic fairies that live in the sky. But, I will always give money to someone who holds a sign saying that they are homeless or will work for food. Even if it is just $1. I'm a huge SUCKER....
    And so the lion fell in love with the lamb...,"
    "What a stupid lamb."
    "What a sick, masochistic lion."
  • Strangest Tribe
    Strangest Tribe Posts: 2,502
    Like I said, I have no religious connections... Jesus=Santa=Easter Bunny to me

    I'm just amused at how these things work... you know...

    the power of suggestion vs. a person's belief system

    ... and the kicker is this is all coming from a complete agnostic.
    the Minions
  • peacocoaNMO
    peacocoaNMO Posts: 99
    christians are funny.
  • harmless_little_f***
    harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
    Jesus didn't stop and pay attention to everyone in need... he made a judgment call. Plenty of people never met him.
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • in_hiding79
    in_hiding79 Posts: 4,315
    peacocoaNMO wrote:
    christians are funny.


    Yes they are...
    And so the lion fell in love with the lamb...,"
    "What a stupid lamb."
    "What a sick, masochistic lion."
  • know1
    know1 Posts: 6,801
    Maybe Frank gives more money to charity than you'll ever dream of giving....?

    It's pretty hypocritical of you to judge him for allegedly judging.


    ...or maybe Frank is Jesus...
    The only people we should try to get even with...
    ...are those who've helped us.

    Right 'round the corner could be bigger than ourselves.
  • Strangest Tribe
    Strangest Tribe Posts: 2,502
    know1 wrote:
    Maybe Frank gives more money to charity than you'll ever dream of giving....?

    It's pretty hypocritical of you to judge him for allegedly judging.


    ...or maybe Frank is Jesus...

    Frank likes internet porn
    the Minions
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    in_hiding79 wrote:
    I'm atheist! I don't believe in God, or Jesus, or Allah, or Buda or anything that claims too be magic fairies that live in the sky. But, I will always give money to someone who holds a sign saying that they are homeless or will work for food. Even if it is just $1. I'm a huge SUCKER....

    This is me:


    http://www.weddleton.com/CC/images/Homeless/HomlessNeedHelpS.jpg

    You can send all donations care of:

    Fill Mookie9999's Empty Pockets
    Penn Station 3rd Bench From The Left On The #2 Train Platform (Downtown)
    New York NY 10001.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • know1
    know1 Posts: 6,801
    Strangest Tribe wrote:
    Frank likes internet porn

    Good for him. You're still a hypocrite.
    The only people we should try to get even with...
    ...are those who've helped us.

    Right 'round the corner could be bigger than ourselves.
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    know1 wrote:
    Good for him. You're still a hypocrite.

    If he isn't religious how is he a hypocrite? It's the bible stating to not pass judgement, he might be perfectly fine with doing it!
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • ForestBrain
    ForestBrain Posts: 460
    We need a "how to trick an atheist" thread. haha
    When life gives you lemons, throw them at somebody.
  • drivingrl
    drivingrl Posts: 1,448
    So true. This is how you trick all Christians. Because all Christians are mindless like that, and every one of them judge everyone else.

    Non-Christians, on the other hand, they never judge someone like that and are always open and chartible to everyone.
    drivingrl: "Will I ever get to meet Gwen Stefani?"
    kevinbeetle: "Yes. When her career washes up and her and Gavin move to Galveston, you will meet her at Hot Topic shopping for a Japanese cheerleader outfit.

    Next!"
  • intodeep
    intodeep Posts: 7,249
    GreenTeaDisease wrote:
    how could he be jesus? he died 2000 years ago.
    The story says he came back once. Why not twice :D

    just playing devils advocate here
    Charlotte 00 | Charlotte 03 | Asheville 04 | Atlanta 12 | Greenville 16 | Columbia 16 |Seattle 18  | Nashville 22 | Ohana Festival 24 x2 | Atlanta 25 x2
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Strangest Tribe wrote:
    Frank likes internet porn

    that just means he IS jesus.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • Slip Kid
    Slip Kid Posts: 1,175
    simply stating my thoughts here:

    Why is it that Christianity always get made fun of the most?

    It's ones choice to believe in something and have faith in something that is beyond the human life. Whether or not one believes this to be contrary shouldn't provoke jokes or any harmful ill will towards that individual.

    I know that it wasn't the posters intent to ridicule or even came up with the joke but it seems that's i'm reading more and more crap spewed out Christianity and I just wonder why? What makes it so laughable? Judaism, Muslim (i forget the name for it) and a whole plethora of religions don't get the same slack as Christianity does.

    I don't fully believe in it but I'm not going to sit here and make fun of it just because I don't. Truth is I could see myself believing in it. I just don't get all the hostility towards this religion
    I just don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die.
  • romybian
    romybian Posts: 1,644
    ForestBrain wrote:
    We need a "how to trick an atheist" thread. haha
    LOL
    I doubt that would work though.
    We don't really care.
    "The joke in your language won't come out the same" (Tom Petty)
    I'm no dude! Dudette!
  • soulsinging
    soulsinging Posts: 13,202
    GreenTeaDisease wrote:
    how could he be jesus? he died 2000 years ago.

    yeah, but the baptists are figuring he'll be back any down now to kick some homo/heathen ass.
  • soulsinging
    soulsinging Posts: 13,202
    Slip Kid wrote:
    simply stating my thoughts here:

    Why is it that Christianity always get made fun of the most?

    It's ones choice to believe in something and have faith in something that is beyond the human life. Whether or not one believes this to be contrary shouldn't provoke jokes or any harmful ill will towards that individual.

    I know that it wasn't the posters intent to ridicule or even came up with the joke but it seems that's i'm reading more and more crap spewed out Christianity and I just wonder why? What makes it so laughable? Judaism, Muslim (i forget the name for it) and a whole plethora of religions don't get the same slack as Christianity does.

    I don't fully believe in it but I'm not going to sit here and make fun of it just because I don't. Truth is I could see myself believing in it. I just don't get all the hostility towards this religion

    becos this is america and people deal more with the amusing foibles of christianity than any other religion. if i lived in iran i'd probly be making mohamed jokes all the time too. then i'd get my head chopped off.

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