Acquaintance Rape

JD Sal

aNiMaL wrote:

Isn't Tish the same girl who started a thread about wanting to have sex with her neighbor while "seeing" another guy?

:rolleyes:

Read page 15 or 16 Animal

soulsinging

small town beck wrote:

I don't think we are being told the whole story either but people were jumping all over her and mocking her here. Maybe it was intense and she felt threatened, maybe she changed her mind I don't know. Crying rape when you haven't been is despicable. It was even all you or maybe not you at all I am not sure but you certainly weren't the one ready to burn her at the stake. I didn't say YOU said she deserved anything. Just seems like people were trying to call her down because of a previous thread. Women have to be more careful, sad but true and sometimes we learn lessons the hard way :(

call her down? i dont know what that means. the reason people reacted was becos nobody remembered that at first. then suddenly after pages of debating, it is revealed this was the same girl who was plotting to seduce her neighbor not long ago. it kind of turned the tide.

small town beck

soulsinging wrote:

call her down? i dont know what that means. the reason people reacted was becos nobody remembered that at first. then suddenly after pages of debating, it is revealed this was the same girl who was plotting to seduce her neighbor not long ago. it kind of turned the tide.

To call someone down? maybe it is a Canadian thing To call someone down to the lowest? anyway not my point. Even if she did invite a guy over it doesn't mean it was for sex and maybe this is a different guy. And she can change her mind.. that SAID the thread title is still misleading and while true we are only hearing one part of one side of the story. Really we are just beating a dead horse here. I once made the mistake of posting in a previous rape thread on here and I should have learned my lesson. My mistake.

Anon

I'd like to hear what Tish has to say in response to her neighbor post now. Tish? Comments?

vital5

I met Ed wrote:

I'd like to hear what Tish has to say in response to her neighbor post now. Tish? Comments?

Tish's Lawyer said she wishes to make no comment

Blackeyedangel

JD Sal wrote:

I'm surprised more people aren't commenting about this:

http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=265129&highlight=neighbor

Tell me not to do it. The neighbor that is.

lmao. what the fuck?

this girl has some serious issues.


ooh and indian summer. I don't recall but I thought I didn't like you. I thought I had dealt with you in another thread about something completely unrelated, but now that I think about it I believe I have you confused with someone else. My sincere apologies.


*edited for a bit more clarity*

pjfan31

tish wrote:

Last weekend, I invited a man over to watch videos since the snow didn't call for going out for coffee. This guy took the invitation as sexual rights. Except for him (respecting) my "No's", I'd say he did everything but rape me. He said I was asking for it by the way I was dressed. And if I wouldn't do this, would I do that? And since I wouldn't do that, would I do this? In the words of Avril Lavigne, it was "badder than it sounds." I held the door open for him to leave and that took 15 painful minutes.

The experience rates #2 in my top two worst times with a male. (The first, worst time being when I nearly divorced yet managed to help write a few hit songs...)

Ah i know wat song u wrote. Avril Lavigne song. U know why i know? No self respecting Pearl Jam fan would admit to knowing lyrics to Avril Lavigne.

BTW that sucks about that bloke, i would beat the shit outta him.

Heineken Helen

danny72688 wrote:

Nowhere did I call her a slut, whore, whatever or imply that she was. Watching a movie at her house, alone, probably lights out, is basically a date. It's more of a date than going to the theater with someone. In a man's mind, that means that something is going down, I'd say 90% or more of the time. Again, not justifying or approving of his actions.

And as far as your experience, the drugs are probably the culprit, not your co-worker. If he was "too off his face" then he obviously wasn't acting normal. You gotta be careful yourself.


Anyway, this is a dead horse it seems, I just wanted to point out that you were putting words and ideas in my mouth.

since when does a date mean you're getting laid though?

And yeh, I blamed the drugs too and not him, that's why I didn't report him... 'the drugs' still raped another girl the following week. Does that make him less responsible? Too many excuses... 'it wasn't his fault, it was the drugs', 'well it was like a date', 'she was dressed sexy'

when are people gonna take responsibilty for THEIR fuck ups?

Heineken Helen

GreenTeaDisease wrote:

hehe once this guy whom I knew and had gone on a few dates with but had become mostly just platonic with asked if I wanted to "watch a movie" one night. I totally assumed he wanted to hook up! I was fine with that idea...so he comes over...and he really just wanted to watch a movie! I felt very foolish!

I'd say so... I've male friends... if they asked me to 'watch a movie' I'd take it as that and not once has it been anything else . If they asked me 'to go out' I would take it as a date... neither of them is an assumption that they're getting any sex though.

Heineken Helen

drivingrl wrote:

It doesn't have to go as far as rape. It's an imbalance of power I'm referring to. That threat or that feeling like a situation is out of your control.

This is the bit they don't get. I've been in that situation a FEW times... where if you don't wanna go further, for a split second there is a moment of force before they see sense and that split second is enough to get your defences up and to scare ya. I'm pleased to see the split of the men on this thread seems to be 50/50 with regards to understanding that though. Because obviously what I've described is nowhere near coming close to rape but in that moment you just simply don't know and the thought that it COULD happen is bad enough.

Heineken Helen

Blackeyedangel wrote:

Seriously? Inviting someone to your house shouldn't be that much of a matter. It is this retardedly sex obsessed culture we live in that fucks everything up. I really don't see why inviting someone over your house should be synonymous with sex.

I really hate people.

I don't get it either... I've never understood the muslim thing that women and men can't be alone together or that the woman should wear her scarf if a man's in the room... that's the way things are going. I don't know how it's got around to this... I guess some people have VERY little self esteem or something cos I can't understand how ANY woman could go along with the 'well she invited him into her house' :eek: or 'if she was dressed like that, what did she expect' argument... especially considering how some of these women are constantly looking for the male attention on this board so I find it quite ironic. I really really don't get it...

Heineken Helen

drivingrl wrote:

Oh, sorry. I meant, the imbalance of power after she says "No."

And I agree, perceiving an imbalance of power doesn't warrant crying "harassment!", because almost anything is offensive nowadays. (Like the thing in Australia about Santa Claus not being allowed to say "Ho, ho, ho!" anymore. wtf?)

But it's very hard to describe how it feels when that line has been crossed and someone has exerted that kind of power over you. I have several friends who have been raped, and it... I know this sounds like an exaggeration, but it's been almost crippling to them.

It's something that makes a victim of these types of things question everything. "Was it something I said?" or "Maybe I shouldn't have worn that," or "Maybe I came onto him," or "How will I ever be intimate with another man again?" Which is terrible because it's never ever the victim's fault. Like everyone else said, "No" means "No".

I suppose also women have heard the story too many times cos women are more likely to open up to other women about this kinda thing... I too know several women who have been raped/abused/assaulted. I'm willing to guess most women do. I think the percentage is FAR higher than we're lead to believe.

Heineken Helen

TrixieCat wrote:

Or give out your sexual kinks unless you are a lonely desperate fool.

I agree 100%

Heineken Helen

in_hiding79 wrote:

WOW, what we have here is...........!!

I'm not saying a word..heheheh

yeh that's really really funny :rolleyes:

who said it was the neighbour? Coulda been the nice guy!

Secondly what the fuck does it have to do with ANYTHING?

sick sick sick sick sick people in this world.

Pearler

Tish, maybe you should have tried the ketchup affect...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=L7703Lnkzio

in_hiding79

Heineken Helen wrote:

yeh that's really really funny :rolleyes:

who said it was the neighbour? Coulda been the nice guy!

Secondly what the fuck does it have to do with ANYTHING?

sick sick sick sick sick people in this world.

HUH??

Heineken Helen

in_hiding79 wrote:

HUH??

in reply to her other thread? You thought it was funny and several of you imply that because she may have asked in another thread if she should 'bang her neighbour' well anything that happens to her from then on actually doesn't matter :rolleyes: . 'The Accused' springs to mind.

Nice :rolleyes:

in_hiding79

Heineken Helen wrote:

in reply to her other thread? You thought it was funny and several of you imply that because she may have asked in another thread if she should 'bang her neighbour' well anything that happens to her from then on actually doesn't matter :rolleyes: . 'The Accused' springs to mind.

Nice :rolleyes:

Weird and really like playing the victim springs to mind actually!!

intodeep

JD Sal wrote:

I'm surprised more people aren't commenting about this:

http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=265129&highlight=neighbor

Tell me not to do it. The neighbor that is.

Thank you for bringing this up. I asked about it on page three but i don't think anyone noticed then.

Heineken Helen

in_hiding79 wrote:

Weird and really like playing the victim springs to mind actually!!

fake and saying everything simply to impress men springs to mind... but hey, I'm not gonna get myself banned over you honey

Judge not lest ye be judged and all that