Fucked up situation

RolandTD20Kdrummer

scb wrote:

While I agree with this post, I can't help but notice the irony that we as a society (not necessarily you) have no acceptance of porn depicting girls under 18 (and we shouldn't) but we're all over it as soon as the girl's 18th birthday comes along. There seems to me to be a possibly contradiction here. But maybe that's a subject for another thread.

Legal age of sexual consent is 16 and 14 in a lot of places if I'm not mistaken,

i.e http://www.avert.org/aofconsent.htm

...but yeah the sex trade is booming. A lot of girls opt in to make money...many are exploited. I guess once the age of consent thing is addressed. Back in the day 15, 16, 17 was a prime age to get married.

josevolution

i would just ask him to move out and cut all ties with him ..

Get_Right

RolandTD20Kdrummer wrote:

You're not going to help him by ratting him out to the cops. That's only going to fuck up his life big time on your conscience.

there you go. there is no mention of molestation or anything like that.
ratting this guy out to the cops/feds will not stop the exploitation or abuse of minors. Like it or not the stuff is out there.

RolandTD20Kdrummer wrote:

Tough call.

Indeed. The internet key is a good idea, but you dont want that stuff in your house period. The fact that the guy may have been engaged in a criminal activity that exposes you to potential criminal liability in the house you share with your wife is more than enough reason to confront him, express your anger and ask him to leave. Offer to get him discreet professional help if the guy has a problem.

I wouldnt turn him in, just get as far away as possible. And keep a journal of the dates of discovery, conversations, etc. should you ever be questioned by the authorities.

muppet

I don't subscribe to the theroy that peadophiles (even though, as far as I'm aware, the person in question is not a peadophile) are automatically stark raving mad, demented grotesque monsters. What they do is disgusting and I'm not trying to defend them but...if anyone has seen 'that' episode of Brass Eye then you might know what I'm getting at.

Lizard

I wonder what ages the OP is talking about.........

I immediately thought it was kids under say 10 which is pretty F***ing sick. and demented. and grotesque. and monsterish.

carolinabeerguy

Make sure you let us know how the confrontation goes. Good luck.

catch22

muppet wrote:

I don't subscribe to the theroy that peadophiles (even though, as far as I'm aware, the person in question is not a peadophile) are automatically stark raving mad, demented grotesque monsters. What they do is disgusting and I'm not trying to defend them but...if anyone has seen 'that' episode of Brass Eye then you might know what I'm getting at.

i haven't, but i agree. this issue is far more insidious than we want to admit. it's easy to dismiss it by labelling these people "monsters" and saying "let's kick their ass" and not having to deal with it. but that doesn't solve the problem. the problem is much bigger and has to do with our entire culture and its refusal to talk about sex. as scb pointed out, the girl that catches a predator for chris hansen one day can have a birthday the next and we think nothing of her fucking 6 guys on camera, whereas the day before any guy who looks at her picture is a sick demented monster. it's not that simple.

Dylan Stone

muppet wrote:

I don't subscribe to the theroy that peadophiles are automatically stark raving mad, demented grotesque monsters.

Well... if you ever worked with sexually abused children you may feel that pedophiles are demented grotesque monsters.

They fuck up the lives of innocent children in irreparably... Mentally, emotionally and physically.

Pedophiles are sick fucks.

RolandTD20Kdrummer

Get_Right wrote:

there you go. there is no mention of molestation or anything like that.
ratting this guy out to the cops/feds will not stop the exploitation or abuse of minors. Like it or not the stuff is out there.




Indeed. The internet key is a good idea, but you dont want that stuff in your house period. The fact that the guy may have been engaged in a criminal activity that exposes you to potential criminal liability in the house you share with your wife is more than enough reason to confront him, express your anger and ask him to leave. Offer to get him discreet professional help if the guy has a problem.

I wouldnt turn him in, just get as far away as possible. And keep a journal of the dates of discovery, conversations, etc. should you ever be questioned by the authorities.

Agree, however now the accomplice thing might get pulled. Once you become aware I think you are legally responsible. I would definitely make a free phone call to a lawyer (from a payphone) to seek advice. Knowing about it and doing nothing (police wise) could be a serious problem now.

I would cut the computer access immediately and give him a time line to move out (couple weeks...a month) before you make "a phone call"

Basically he fucked up and put other people at considerable risk for his behavior.

Nobody's fault but his own. What a shit deal for the original poster.

catch22

GTFLYGIRL wrote:

Well... if you ever worked with sexually abused children you may feel that pedophiles are demented grotesque monsters.

They fuck up the lives of innocent children in irreparably... Mentally, emotionally and physically.

Pedophiles are sick fucks.

most of them were themselves molested at children. were they monsters then? did they deserve it when they were kids? so when did they become monsters, and why? what can we do to stop it BEFORE they molest a child?

chime

I think whatever else happens that computer needs to go to police. There could be evidence on there that could help them to trace and protect vulnerable children ... and possibly catch those involved in creating the images.

catch22

RolandTD20Kdrummer wrote:

Agree, however now the accomplice thing might get pulled. Once you become aware I think you are legally responsible. I would definitely make a free phone call to a lawyer (from a payphone) to seek advice. Knowing about it and doing nothing (police wise) could be a serious problem now.

I would cut the computer access immediately and give him a time line to move out (couple weeks...a month) before you make "a phone call"

Basically he fucked up and put other people at considerable risk for his behavior.

Nobody's fault but his own. What a shit deal for the original poster.

i'd go backwards there. talk to a lawyer first. no need to do this cia calling from payphones bullshit. the lawyer is not going to turn you in. don't listen to the paranoid stuff.

_

GTFLYGIRL wrote:

Well... if you ever worked with sexually abused children you may feel that pedophiles are demented grotesque monsters.

They fuck up the lives of innocent children in irreparably... Mentally, emotionally and physically.

Pedophiles are sick fucks.

Sadly, as you know, many of them became that way because they too were molested as innocent children. :(

Edit: I see that Catch22 already beat me to it.

muppet

GTFLYGIRL wrote:

Well... if you ever worked with sexually abused children you may feel that pedophiles are demented grotesque monsters.

They fuck up the lives of innocent children in irreparably... Mentally, emotionally and physically.

Pedophiles are sick fucks.

Agreed, to an extent - I'm not trying to find excuses for them. What they do is disgusting. But like others have said, you've got to step back and look at the bigger pitcure. Rarely is it simply black and white.

comebackwoman

catch22 wrote:

most of them were themselves molested at children. were they monsters then? did they deserve it when they were kids? so when did they become monsters, and why? what can we do to stop it BEFORE they molest a child?

I wish they were monsters - then they'd be much easier to spot and we wouldn't let kids anywhere near them. Unfortunately they're somebody's husband, father, brother, best friend, etc...usually the typical guy on the block that no one is expecting. I think treatment is the key for anyone who's been abused for all the various repercussions that can come from it...and definitely not turning a blind eye.

prytocorduroy

Your friend needs to move out no doubt. You should go up to him and ask him to explain (name of 1.4G folder here). He will no doubt know what you're talking about and that he's been caught. Do cut his internet off, but I wouldn't say cut him off. He's going to need friendship after the dust settles, and other than this incident, I am under the impression he is a good person. He's ill and maybe once the secret is out (between you two) he will try to change? Possibly he doesn't think he is doing anything wrong?


Say what you will, but I'd much rather this guy find "release" on the internet in a fantasy instead of in reality. How long does the fantasy stay a fantasy though?


I'm sorry this is happening.

facepollution

danny72688 wrote:

I am under the impression he is a good person. He's ill and maybe once the secret is out (between you two) he will try to change?

Say what you will, but I'd much rather this guy find "release" on the internet in a fantasy instead of in reality. How long does the fantasy stay a fantasy though?

Unfortunately, I don't think someone 'trying' to change is ever enough when it can involve the abuse of children. I just don't think you can take the risk. I agree that it's a form of mental illness, and it might be harsh to just throw these people into prison, but the bottom line is that children deserve to be protected, and that has to over-ride any friendship.

Also the problem about finding 'release' on the internet in terms of this kind of thing, is that those images are real - real life children being abused - this guy might as well be abusing them himself, because he is supporting that behaviour.

_

danny72688 wrote:

Your friend needs to move out no doubt. You should go up to him and ask him to explain (name of 1.4G folder here). He will no doubt know what you're talking about and that he's been caught. Do cut his internet off, but I wouldn't say cut him off. He's going to need friendship after the dust settles, and other than this incident, I am under the impression he is a good person. He's ill and maybe once the secret is out (between you two) he will try to change? Possibly he doesn't think he is doing anything wrong?


Say what you will, but I'd much rather this guy find "release" on the internet in a fantasy instead of in reality. How long does the fantasy stay a fantasy though?


I'm sorry this is happening.

Although I agree with you, I have to say that "finding release on the internet" is illegal for a reason - because kids must have been harmed/exploited in order for those pictures on the internet to have been created to begin with. So that must be stopped as well.

Maybe his pictures could help lead to the people who took them... ???

catch22

danny72688 wrote:

Your friend needs to move out no doubt. You should go up to him and ask him to explain (name of 1.4G folder here). He will no doubt know what you're talking about and that he's been caught. Do cut his internet off, but I wouldn't say cut him off. He's going to need friendship after the dust settles, and other than this incident, I am under the impression he is a good person. He's ill and maybe once the secret is out (between you two) he will try to change? Possibly he doesn't think he is doing anything wrong?

this is a good point. this is about the only thing people cannot, under any circumstances, ever admit to anyone. you can be a heroin addict and a rapist, and people will send you to rehab and give you anger management. you can be violently schizophrenic and people will try to get you the right treatment and medication to manage it. you can beat your wife and get anger management class. but say you think you have a problem like this, and you'll be lucky to get out of the conversation alive. nobody will lift a finger to help you even if you want nothing more than for it to stop and they'd rather, like chadwick, kick the shit out of you than to try to make sure you don't hurt any kids.

danny72688 wrote:

Say what you will, but I'd much rather this guy find "release" on the internet in a fantasy instead of in reality. How long does the fantasy stay a fantasy though?

i watch a lot of (normal) porn and i have to say that for me, it's stayed fantasy too long!

too soon for a joke?

norm

scb wrote:

Although I agree with you, I have to say that "finding release on the internet" is illegal for a reason - because kids must have been harmed/exploited in order for those pictures on the internet to have been created to begin with. So that must be stopped as well.

Maybe his pictures could help lead to the people who took them... ???

using my law & order SVU information apparently there is software that can take a picture of an 18 year old who looks young already and make her look 5-10 years younger...since the person in the picture is legal so is the picture....and the sick fuck that thought that one up should be hung by his testes :mad: