Fucked up situation

terminal velocity

Unfortunately, this is not a hypothetical question. My good friend, best man at my wedding, moved in with my wife and I 2 months ago. I was on his computer the other day, and I stumbled upon his uh, child pornography collection. 1.4 GB. What the fuck do I do? Can't imagine confronting him about it. For sure can't do nothing. The best I can think of is to delete the folder without his knowledge, making it gone, and letting him realize he's been caught. I feel violated that he's in our house rent-free, using our internet to do this. I feel sick now. Better get back to class..

Dead Man Walking

call the cops before it's too late...remember that's YOUR IP address...

...and that slo makes him total scum and you don't need friends like that.

also kick him in the dick for me.

Lizard

You sure you did not suspect something? How do you "tumble" upon it?

You need to think of the children he has/may hurt so yeah, he needs to be turned it. Sometimes it sucks to do the right thing.

saveuplife

terminal velocity wrote:

Unfortunately, this is not a hypothetical question. My good friend, best man at my wedding, moved in with my wife and I 2 months ago. I was on his computer the other day, and I stumbled upon his uh, child pornography collection. 1.4 GB. What the fuck do I do? Can't imagine confronting him about it. For sure can't do nothing. The best I can think of is to delete the folder without his knowledge, making it gone, and letting him realize he's been caught. I feel violated that he's in our house rent-free, using our internet to do this. I feel sick now. Better get back to class..

Bro, if it is really legit child po_rn.... you got to confront him. That's just wrong and sick. He needs help. Get him it.

eyedclaar

Your computer pretty much makes it your porn. Delete everything and kick that mofo out!

muppet

Turn him in. Not only is it a repulsive thing to do, he's using your IP address (I assume?) and directly involving you.

I wouldn't try and delete it if I were you, leave it to the cops maybe? Who knows.

Lizard

eyedclaar wrote:

Your computer pretty much makes it your porn. Delete everything and kick that mofo out!

it was his friend's computer, not his. Diff. IP address, right?

catch22

terminal velocity wrote:

Unfortunately, this is not a hypothetical question. My good friend, best man at my wedding, moved in with my wife and I 2 months ago. I was on his computer the other day, and I stumbled upon his uh, child pornography collection. 1.4 GB. What the fuck do I do? Can't imagine confronting him about it. For sure can't do nothing. The best I can think of is to delete the folder without his knowledge, making it gone, and letting him realize he's been caught. I feel violated that he's in our house rent-free, using our internet to do this. I feel sick now. Better get back to class..

yikes. this is a tough spot.

1. you need to cover yourself first. it's your home and your IP address. you could be held responsible. so it needs to stop, now.

2. it's a tough call on involving the police. it will end the friendship and he's going to have a hard time in prison. as a friend, it's not easy, but it may be worthwhile to try confronting him. he's going to be angry that you "snooped" on him (going to be his first reaction). but if you can get past that, you could try to get him into some counseling or something. my guess is he doesn't want to be doing this, though it's one disease that has pretty poor success rates with respect to cure.

no matter what though, you can't let him continue living there and doing this. it jeopardizes your family. even if you delete it, he could just pick up doing it again and try to be more sneaky about it. you don't know if it will actually stop him.

chiquimonkey

he needs to get the hell out of your house. he's compromised you enough already by using your IP address, bad enough he was doing it in the first place. if he gives the tiniest bit of resistance, call the cops.

MonsterOfTheMidway

Pete Townsend was the best man at your wedding?

























































Too soon?


Seriously, call the cops. That's just sick.

terminal velocity

one ip address routed over the wireless. straight back to me in a legal proceeding.

Yellow Ledbelly

The folks saying he had endangered you would be right as far as I know and it is a fucked up situation. I understand the difficulty you might have with just putting your foot down...whether that's by turning him in or kicking him out....because I had to end the longest friendship in my life a couple of years ago. It wasn't anything as serious as what you are dealing with, but that was tough to do even though I knew it had to happen.

You already know in your mind what you have to do I'm guessing.....you just don't want to admit it just yet. Good luck

angie76

I would not only delete the folder but rip him a new one. Like other people already mentioned, it's your computer he's viewing it on. He sounds like a scumbag to me.

the wolf

good luck. even if you go to the cops, it still could sound like its your porn and you are trying to cover your ass. im sure some people here think that. not saying i do, but some will. i would still maybe get the cops involved.

hope all works out for you.

chiquimonkey

if it's his computer though (like it's physically in his room or something), you can make the argument with the cops that it is his material, not yours. the sooner you move on this the better i think.

terminal velocity

We have separate computers. That's all on his

Vedderlution_Baby

Confront him. But don't do it in a hostile manner. Tell him you need to talk to him about something. When you do, tell him you found it on the computer, you know it's his and that you want him to get rid of it. Tell him you're extremely upset that he would but you in this situation, especially since you're trying to help him out and that you thinks it's unfair that he's taking advantage of you. From there, I guess there's two routes you can go down. Contact the authorities, or try to talk to him. If you do contact the authorities, be prepared to defend yourself and to have your friend try to put the blame on you. If you try to talk to him, tell him you're ready to listen to him and help him find help if it means keeping him out of jail, but only on the condition that he really does get help. And if you tell him you'll help him, mean it. Think about the choices very carefully. But do not wait too long.

nick1977

1. You need to kick him out of your house ASAP. This cannot be tolerated. He is using your IP address.

2. I'm not sure about going to the cops. It is your IP address, and he could claim it is you, you claim it is him, and you get into a finger pointing match. You both could get prosecuted. I just don't know.

I'd say kick him out and consider going to the police. Permanently delete all that shit off your computer.

This is a tough situation, but you need to cover your ass here, and do not need to tolerate this or just not say anything. He is putting you in danger with the police.

I probably would go to the police with a preliminary strike. If you don't the police could come after you and then if you implicate him, it could look like you are passing blame.

dawng

Lizard wrote:

it was his friend's computer, not his. Diff. IP address, right?

Wrong - same IP address. The ISP (internet service provider) will assign one IP address to your home...than your router will assign internal IP addresses to your individual computers. The one that will be reported is the one the ISP assigns your home.

If I read correctly - this is his computer. That will go a long way in showing that it was not you.

However - this could still get you in HUGE trouble. If he downloaded any of the photos using your interenet connection, there is a trail pointing to YOU. And if the police come knocking on your door and you had kicked him out already and you have no evidence (his computer) than you are most likely screwed.

I'm not a lawyer - but you should talk to one ASAP. And depending on what they say - you may need to call the police. At the very least - as a friend - I'd confront him if I were in your position. He needs help!

Good luck!

mole1985

Call the police. NOW. There is too much at risk if you just ignore it. I know he's your friend but damn it you gotta do the right thing and as in most things in life the right thing is often the hardest. Good Luck.

jeffbr

I would kick his ass for potentially getting you in a world of trouble. Then I'd call the cops. I would expect the friendship to be over, and that would be fine. Why would anyone want to be friends with a scumbag who preys upon kids, or at least supports those who do. Fuck him.

It seems pretty black and white to me. Is somebody really worried about the feelings of a kiddie porn collector?