casual sex

lucylespian

soulsinging wrote:

i think that is kinda the whole point of the article. i mean, just becos a small number of people have drug problems or depression or were sexually abused, does that mean we shouldn't talk about it or try to help people out of it?

What I was saying, is that you can't generlaise to everybody from a single or small sample size. BY all means , lets help those who need help. That's what I do for a living.
In fact just now I saw a young lady who has been merrily shagging recently and after giving her her test results, outilned teh premise in teh post at teh top of teh thread.

Let me say she went very red in teh face as she roared with laughter at the thought that she got pissed so she cold stand sex and waking upo aftereward. We had a great old laugh !!
She said she thinks it's the blokes who have trouble handling one-nighters.,.
I'm inclined to agree, you put in all that spadework and expect more than one night !! LOL !!!!

Jeanie

lucylespian wrote:

What I was saying, is that you can't generlaise to everybody from a single or small sample size. BY all means , lets help those who need help. That's what I do for a living.
In fact just now I saw a young lady who has been merrily shagging recently and after giving her her test results, outilned teh premise in teh post at teh top of teh thread.

Let me say she went very red in teh face as she roared with laughter at the thought that she got pissed so she cold stand sex and waking upo aftereward. We had a great old laugh !!
She said she thinks it's the blokes who have trouble handling one-nighters.,.
I'm inclined to agree, you put in all that spadework and expect more than one night !! LOL !!!!

Seems part of that whole thing about women still not being able to own their sexuality. Guys do not like it if you get up the next morning and you aren't interested in exchanging numbers or heaven forbid you leave straight after the act. It's ok if they get in first, but not if you do.
Maybe its a human thing? Girls don't like it either I guess.
But I wanna know how come guys get a free pass on this stuff but if a woman comes forward and admits to the same behaviour there's something wrong with her. I say good on her for embracing her sexuality and getting her rocks off however she pleases.

lucylespian

Jeanie wrote:

Seems part of that whole thing about women still not being able to own their sexuality. Guys do not like it if you get up the next morning and you aren't interested in exchanging numbers or heaven forbid you leave straight after the act. It's ok if they get in first, but not if you do.
Maybe its a human thing? Girls don't like it either I guess.
But I wanna know how come guys get a free pass on this stuff but if a woman comes forward and admits to the same behaviour there's something wrong with her. I say good on her for embracing her sexuality and getting her rocks off however she pleases.

I dunno, I was really joking. I've been married so long, I would have to make shit up. BUt you are so right about that whole wmone not owning their own sexulity thing.
I am all for people owning their own bodies. Women are as guilty as men of the sin of trying to control wmoens sexuality.
Slut!!
Slapper !!

soulsinging

lucylespian wrote:

What I was saying, is that you can't generlaise to everybody from a single or small sample size. BY all means , lets help those who need help. That's what I do for a living.
In fact just now I saw a young lady who has been merrily shagging recently and after giving her her test results, outilned teh premise in teh post at teh top of teh thread.

Let me say she went very red in teh face as she roared with laughter at the thought that she got pissed so she cold stand sex and waking upo aftereward. We had a great old laugh !!
She said she thinks it's the blokes who have trouble handling one-nighters.,.
I'm inclined to agree, you put in all that spadework and expect more than one night !! LOL !!!!

i dont think anyone implied women have to get liquored up to stand sex. the implication was drink to fuck a complete stranger they never intend to see again.

soulsinging

Jeanie wrote:

Seems part of that whole thing about women still not being able to own their sexuality. Guys do not like it if you get up the next morning and you aren't interested in exchanging numbers or heaven forbid you leave straight after the act. It's ok if they get in first, but not if you do.
Maybe its a human thing? Girls don't like it either I guess.
But I wanna know how come guys get a free pass on this stuff but if a woman comes forward and admits to the same behaviour there's something wrong with her. I say good on her for embracing her sexuality and getting her rocks off however she pleases.

id like you to show me where i said anything like this. in fact, the first sentence in my thread was not that guys should get a free pass and women shouldn't own their sexuality, it was that guys should not be doing this either. there's no anti-women agenda, as much as you like trying to read that into my posts.

and what's it mean "ok if they get in first?" is that an aussie thing?

Jeanie

lucylespian wrote:

I dunno, I was really joking. I've been married so long, I would have to make shit up. BUt you are so right about that whole wmone not owning their own sexulity thing.
I am all for people owning their own bodies. Women are as guilty as men of the sin of trying to control wmoens sexuality.
Slut!!
Slapper !!

Well it's part of that whole are you a good girl or a bad girl crap!
So if you wanna make sure you're seen as a good girl you are gonna join in the chorus of bagging any body that's getting what you aren't. Maybe feeling smug and repressed works for some women.
Sad really.
I'm proud to be a slut. Whatever that means.

Perhaps if I'd met my life partner earlier I'd not be considered one, but I reckon even if I had, I'd still be a slut. If slut means enjoys regular sex.

lucylespian

soulsinging wrote:

i dont think anyone implied women have to get liquored up to stand sex. the implication was drink to fuck a complete stranger they never intend to see again.

Yeah I know, that's what I was talking about. INterestingly I was talking to a girl once and she said sthat she always had to be drunk to have sex for the first time with a guy, even if they had been dating for a while, which I found really odd, cos nearly every girl I ever slept with was pretty sober. Ocasionally they were pissed, but not very often. She thought that was weird, could not understand how a girl could be sober for eh first one.
Funny old world !!

lucylespian

Jeanie wrote:

Well it's part of that whole are you a good girl or a bad girl crap!
So if you wanna make sure you're seen as a good girl you are gonna join in the chorus of bagging any body that's getting what you aren't. Maybe feeling smug and repressed works for some women.
Sad really.
I'm proud to be a slut. Whatever that means.

Perhaps if I'd met my life partner earlier I'd not be considered one, but I reckon even if I had, I'd still be a slut. If slut means enjoys regular sex.

I think this is the basis of the mythology of witches. The ultimate way to deal with a pretty girl wo is out of line sexually and turning too many boys heads is for the other wpmoen to acuse her of witchcraft and either birn her or turn her out. Tends to discourage other girls from trying it, keeeps everyone in line and the playing field open to everyone.

Jeanie

soulsinging wrote:

id like you to show me where i said anything like this. in fact, the first sentence in my thread was not that guys should get a free pass and women shouldn't own their sexuality, it was that guys should not be doing this either. there's no anti-women agenda, as much as you like trying to read that into my posts.

and what's it mean "ok if they get in first?" is that an aussie thing?

I wasn't having a go at you ss. I've barely read the whole thread. I certainly didn't take anything you said as an anti woman agenda.

I was saying in my experience, men do not like it if you leave immediately after the act or don't supply a phone number. And that a lot of guys seem to like to leave or not supply a phone number first because they want to be the one "to get in first", to be the one who exerts the power in the situation.
More women appear to be doing that though too.
I was saying that this seems to be an across the spectrum thing.
Nobody wants to be the person wanting more after an interaction such as this. That seems to be the nature of human relationships, there seems to always be some one in control of the situation and the follower. Or someone holds more of the balance of power. That's all. No sinister rampant lesbian man hating going on here. I was simply acknowledging things as I see them.
I would like to see women be able to do as they please sexually and not be labelled derogatory things like slut. As opposed to guys who seem to be able to do as they please sexually and are labelled more admiringly as studs.

Jeanie

lucylespian wrote:

Yeah I know, that's what I was talking about. INterestingly I was talking to a girl once and she said sthat she always had to be drunk to have sex for the first time with a guy, even if they had been dating for a while, which I found really odd, cos nearly every girl I ever slept with was pretty sober. Ocasionally they were pissed, but not very often. She thought that was weird, could not understand how a girl could be sober for eh first one.
Funny old world !!

bloody board!! I had a reponse to this all typed out and something went wrong with the submitting. ANYWAY, let me see if I can remember what I said. :eek:

Oh yeah, I can understand where she's coming from lucy.
It took me a lot of years to learn not to make alcohol a factor if I was getting down to it for the first time with a guy. And ironically when I finally did learn how to, I was so focused on me "getting everything right this time" that I failed to notice he was a violent control freak. I understand why it is that I needed alcohol in order to be intimate and it's completely understandable to me now. I think we do what we know at the time.
And I guess we live and learn. When you know and understand yourself better you are able to make better choices. I'd love if alcohol wasn't a factor in some of my earlier experiences, but I can't change it. Only move forward.

Jeanie

lucylespian wrote:

I think this is the basis of the mythology of witches. The ultimate way to deal with a pretty girl wo is out of line sexually and turning too many boys heads is for the other wpmoen to acuse her of witchcraft and either birn her or turn her out. Tends to discourage other girls from trying it, keeeps everyone in line and the playing field open to everyone.

Do you think it only had to do with attractiveness? I was thinking that wicka and witchcraft was a pretty powerful female doctrine. Must have been powerful if it needed to be shut down!

lucylespian

Jeanie wrote:

Do you think it only had to do with attractiveness? I was thinking that wicka and witchcraft was a pretty powerful female doctrine. Most have been powerful if it needed to be shut down!

mmmm maybe, I think it iwas usually teh prety girls who were gettin more than was thought to their fair share of attention, but I'm no expert. I tihnk where most accusations of witchcraft occured there was no wicka etc going on, just girls being girls.
I was interested to read that in Salem, there was an old man "pressed to death with stones" for refusing to go to trial.

catefrances

lucylespian wrote:

mmmm maybe, I think it iwas usually teh prety girls who were gettin more than was thought to their fair share of attention, but I'm no expert. I tihnk where most accusations of witchcraft occured there was no wicka etc going on, just girls being girls.
I was interested to read that in Salem, there was an old man "pressed to death with stones" for refusing to go to trial.

i suspect someone has been watching too many episodes of bewitched.
that was a veiled sexist comment based on the beauty myth i feel lucy.


lets not forget that midwives were considered to be witches by some.

Jeanie

lucylespian wrote:

mmmm maybe, I think it iwas usually teh prety girls who were gettin more than was thought to their fair share of attention, but I'm no expert. I tihnk where most accusations of witchcraft occured there was no wicka etc going on, just girls being girls.
I was interested to read that in Salem, there was an old man "pressed to death with stones" for refusing to go to trial.

Yikes!!! Folks could think up some stuff hey? :eek:
Yeah, I was thinking that historically speaking witches, and wizards too I suppose, held a fairly powerful position in society up until the time that organized religion came through. Then all had to be cleansed in order for us to follow "the one true faith". I mean there was evidence to suggest that the healing treatments used by early witches, handed down through the generations, are actually the basis of many of our medicines today.
I guess it's different in terms of America, but I was thinking of the witches of England and Ireland and Scotland. I'm not sure but I think that witchcraft goes back to the pagans. And the christians annihilated the pagans.

Jeanie

catefrances wrote:

......lets not forget that midwives were considered to be witches by some.

ah yes cate!! you spade caller you!!!

exactly!! this was the case with midwives.
Actually this whole idea that lucy has sparked has got me thinking I need to go back and refresh my memory by reading.

Scubascott

lucylespian wrote:

Yeah I know, that's what I was talking about. INterestingly I was talking to a girl once and she said sthat she always had to be drunk to have sex for the first time with a guy, even if they had been dating for a while, which I found really odd, cos nearly every girl I ever slept with was pretty sober. Ocasionally they were pissed, but not very often. She thought that was weird, could not understand how a girl could be sober for eh first one.
Funny old world !!

All this girl on girl talk is getting soulsinging excited.

lucylespian

catefrances wrote:

i suspect someone has been watching too many episodes of bewitched.
that was a veiled sexist comment based on the beauty myth i feel lucy.


lets not forget that midwives were considered to be witches by some.

Ouch, you called me sexist !!

Them's fighting woids ya know. Not sure how you get there form anything I have siad though. Someone needs to genotype me for Scubascott.

Jeanie

Scubascott wrote:

All this girl on girl talk is getting soulsinging excited.

doesn't take much these days scott!!

Scubascott

lucylespian wrote:

Ouch, you called me sexist !!

Them's fighting woids ya know. Not sure how you get there form anything I have siad though. Someone needs to genotype me for Scubascott.

Damn it. Sorry. Maybe it was wishful thinking on my part. With a name like lucylespian (lesbian?) you can understand how I'd get confused.

lucylespian

Scubascott wrote:

Damn it. Sorry. Maybe it was wishful thinking on my part. With a name like lucylespian (lesbian?) you can understand how I'd get confused.

Yeah, tricky little XY that I am, and there's me with all that stuff validating women's rights too, then get called sexist.
Lucy is my guitar, Lucy the Les P.