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For those going to show with children

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    Wow lots of judgements and harsh words and judgements on me as a parent. Just bc I want my child to experience a concert? Big deal! I know that whatever show I go to, I'll have good seats, so don't worry about my child being bored or crying. He doesn't do that. I think it would be a fun thing for him to experience. It's not going to be just me and him, but also his dad. So between the two of us, he will have fun. Of course I'll put headphones on him to protect his hearing. I'm not the type of parent to tell anyone else at the show how to act or what not to do around my child. Obviously I know what goes on there and if I'm not cool with something I will remove my child from it. He's been to quite a few street fairs in Seattle and loves music, loves to dance around and is very interested in what's going on. I'd prefer his first PJ show to be more of an outside thing where we can sit on a lawn or something. Sucks bc I like my close seats but i wouldn't mind doing that for a show or two.
    I went to DMB for the first time at the Gorge and it was very kid friendly. That show was awesome and I'll def be bringing him along to it. He goes wherever I go, I don't see that as a bad thing.
    "I'll ride the wave where it takes me.."
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    dawngdawng Posts: 644
    YAHAMITA HERE USING DAWNS COMPUTER. We are getting ready to head 2 Vancouver, but what I wanted to say is if your child starts to cry and throw a tantrum, be a good parent and take your child out of the venue. Nothing is more distracting after you paid good money too see a show is a screaming, crying child.
    Check out my Sudsy Chick Etsy Store for all natural homemade bath products!
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    PatrickBatemanPatrickBateman Posts: 2,243
    My son wanted to go (12) but I didn't want to have to worry about him...especially in the parking lots before and after the show. Some of the lots at the Meadows are questionable after the beer starts flowing. I remember being 17-18 and going to concerts....
    If a man speaks in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
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    *dawn* wrote:
    YAHAMITA HERE USING DAWNS COMPUTER. We are getting ready to head 2 Vancouver, but what I wanted to say is if your child starts to cry and throw a tantrum, be a good parent and take your child out of the venue. Nothing is more distracting after you paid good money too see a show is a screaming, crying child.

    He's three. He doesn't throw tantrums and cry! If he did, of course I'd take him out. Who would stand there??? Way stating the obvious.
    "I'll ride the wave where it takes me.."
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    burnerbenburnerben Posts: 80
    4Powers20 wrote:
    All i am saying is i like to smoke a joint or two at shows and if I walk in and see a young kid in the seat next to mine, I get annoyed. I am the type who wont smoke if there is a kid next to me no matter how stealth I can be. It's not fair to the kid. But it is really not fair to everyone around you to have to walk on eggshells because a kid is in the middle of a rock concert. So if you want to bring a kid, get a lawn ticket and find a nice little area, possibly near other parents with kids, but dont buy seats where everyone around you doesnt have a choice but to deal with a child around them all night. It's not fair to the people spending money to go to a show.

    Probably the most reasonable post on here. It's a concert, it will be loud, crowded, and there will be loads of risky adult behavior. That behavior is plenty annoying in its own right, but is unrelated to the debate regarding the choice to bring your child outside of its impact of the circumstances that the child will experience.

    If you bring a kid, you aren't going to see the concert for yourself, you're going to see the concert for your kid. You must attend to your child the entire time...even during the crazy RVM jam, you should always have an eye on your kid. To me, that would completely defeat the purpose of the show and I'd definitely not bring a child out of pure selfishness.

    However, I can also imagine that seeing one's child's face light up during their first RVM jam could be completely priceless. Someone told a story about a youngling getting her wish to hear Smile, that would be incredible. But, if instead your kid gets a bit freaked out and just wants to go home, you should be prepared to leave at the drop of a hat.

    As a practical matter, I'd definitely choose to be on the lawn towards the back of the venue (but not too close to the rear speakers). It's less crowded, the volume is not as overbearing, the kid can run around and see better, and you are more likely to be able to create a "family zone" by sitting around a bunch of other folks who bring kids. I've seen these areas at a lot of shows that are fairly free of tomfoolery, allowing a mellow location from which to watch the show. Sometimes I sit right in front of these areas when I just want to take it easy at the show.

    It's important to recognize that you can't force the environment around you at a concert. It's never really effective to try and control the behavior or attitudes of others, whether they be children or drunks, and the conflict diminishes the overall vibe. The benefit of the lawn is that if you find the environment around you unsatisfactory, you can easily move to another location (this goes for drunks in a "family zone" as well as kids outside the beer tent). In seats, you're married to the folks around you for the rest of the show.

    My first morning off in ages and I just start rambling, I should go be productive or something.
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    PatrickBatemanPatrickBateman Posts: 2,243
    My son wanted to go (12) but I didn't want to have to worry about him...especially in the parking lots before and after the show. Some of the lots at the Meadows are questionable after the beer starts flowing. I remember being 17-18 and going to concerts....

    Plus, it's "dad's turn".

    I work 50 hours a week, manage little league, teeball, change diapers, etc etc blah blah.....I need a night to myself to let loose and what better place than a PJ show.

    I am pretty sure the Meadows has a "family area"
    If a man speaks in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
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    burnerben wrote:
    Probably the most reasonable post on here. It's a concert, it will be loud, crowded, and there will be loads of risky adult behavior. That behavior is plenty annoying in its own right, but is unrelated to the debate regarding the choice to bring your child outside of its impact of the circumstances that the child will experience.

    If you bring a kid, you aren't going to see the concert for yourself, you're going to see the concert for your kid. You must attend to your child the entire time...even during the crazy RVM jam, you should always have an eye on your kid. To me, that would completely defeat the purpose of the show and I'd definitely not bring a child out of pure selfishness.

    However, I can also imagine that seeing one's child's face light up during their first RVM jam could be completely priceless. Someone told a story about a youngling getting her wish to hear Smile, that would be incredible. But, if instead your kid gets a bit freaked out and just wants to go home, you should be prepared to leave at the drop of a hat.

    As a practical matter, I'd definitely choose to be on the lawn towards the back of the venue (but not too close to the rear speakers). It's less crowded, the volume is not as overbearing, the kid can run around and see better, and you are more likely to be able to create a "family zone" by sitting around a bunch of other folks who bring kids. I've seen these areas at a lot of shows that are fairly free of tomfoolery, allowing a mellow location from which to watch the show. Sometimes I sit right in front of these areas when I just want to take it easy at the show.

    It's important to recognize that you can't force the environment around you at a concert. It's never really effective to try and control the behavior or attitudes of others, whether they be children or drunks, and the conflict diminishes the overall vibe. The benefit of the lawn is that if you find the environment around you unsatisfactory, you can easily move to another location (this goes for drunks in a "family zone" as well as kids outside the beer tent). In seats, you're married to the folks around you for the rest of the show.

    My first morning off in ages and I just start rambling, I should go be productive or something.

    I agree, very good post. There's ways of putting things without being rude or putting down other's ideas etc. So thanks.
    Trust me, I am taking all of these things into consideration. I won't be taking him to any venues that are inside most likely. My thought is to take him to the Gorge and camp out with my friends. He would love it. And I can't wait to see how he likes his first PJ show. I don't mind giving up some of my fun for him. I'm 30, I've been to a lot of shows. yes, I love it, but I'm not that selfish to think only of myself. :)
    "I'll ride the wave where it takes me.."
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    I've found a lot of times, parents bring their kids to these things because they think the kid SHOULD be into it ... not because the kid actually IS into it ... or the kid isn't into it at nearly level it would require to sustain interest for about three hours.

    You've seen these kids at various events before. They look like they are in hell. Why would anyone do that to a child?

    *Note to all parents reading this: I'm not referring to your kid. Your kid loves Pearl Jam, knows all the words to Lukin and can name all the drummers in succession. I'm talking about other people's kids.

    this was really my point as well. I think if you are trying to be a cool parent (or uncle/aunt, godparent, whatever) wait until the kid is a preteen/teen and REALLY wants to see his/her favorite band and allow it (with supervision or whatever depending on the age/circumstances). go along with THEM to THEIR favorite band. I think that'll make much more of an impact on the kid's life than dragging them along to see YOUR favorite band when they're too young to really want to go or to remember it.
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    missblackmissblack Posts: 15
    3 is way too young for a show like this. I am not saying that Pearl Jam puts on a crazy out of control show but it will be crowded and people just don't look down while they are walking unless you're planning on carrying him everywhere. We took our son to see Green Day when he was 6 and although he loved the show I was nervous about losing him the whole night and he kept getting stepped on. I did make a conscious effort to get back pretty far in case it was too much for him. And YES those bathroom breaks, "I'm hungry" and "I'm tired" moments SUCKED!!!! If you do take him remember to bring ear plugs!
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    kinetickinetic Posts: 148
    *dawn* wrote:
    ...if your child starts to cry and throw a tantrum, be a good parent and take your child out of the venue. Nothing is more distracting after you paid good money too see a show is a screaming, crying child.

    Just like any other taking your kid to a new place type of situation, I suppose you should just be prepared to leave IMMEDIATELY if your kid is exposed to anything that makes you uncomfortable or the kid just wants to go.

    It's kinda like getting all geared up to take the fams to the beach and after hours of prep time and driving, they got hot, sticky and pissy in a half hour. The grown-up in you usually recognizes to cut your losses and just go home, thwarted plans aside.

    I like the idea of exposing kids to things you're into, sharing experiences and widening their horizons, but I personally would be unhappy if I paid good $ and had to leave early. If I was iffy about it, I would probably just hire a sitter and wait til they're older.

    The last thing I'd say is again, I like your thinking but you're taking them to what's most definitely considered a non-child-friendly environment, so don't be surprised if your kid is unhappy or the people around you aren't too pleased.

    But if you do it, get protective earphones. And smile a lot at the people around you.
    When you're married, you'll understand the importance of fresh produce.
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    all this being said, the amount of parents bringing kids (running the gamut of ages) to shows these days is really astonishing! the last 2 all-ages shows I went to were the foo fighters and the chili peppers. there were soooo many people at them who weren't even in born in 1995 when the foo fighters started up! I think this is just a reflection of the rest of society in general- people are being more and more bold in terms of bringing kids into traditionally adult situations (and *some* of them expect the adults in attendance to accommodate the children). I have to say that while I think exposing kids to rock is great, it is a bit irksome when Hard Rock Show X becomes Disney World. Having 5 year olds all around does make the scene a little less cool. I say, follow the natural progression. Take the kids to the kiddie-pop show of their choice when they ask at age 9, then let them experience rock shows as teenagers the way all of us did. I'm just saying it seems a little more appropriate in general.
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    edvedder913edvedder913 Posts: 1,810
    my son has been asking to go see PJ since he was 6 - I continue to say no b/c of various factors. However, since we were planning a vaca to San Diego and Ed just so happened to plan his solo gig the same week, I thought it would be a good time for my 8 year old to get to experience a live show.

    I figure Ed's show will not be as loud and/or rowdy or long as a PJ show. I never planned on taking him until he was 12-13, but made an exception for this. Let's hope I did the right thing and he enjoys it. he is SOOOOOOO excited..........
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    He's three. He doesn't throw tantrums and cry! If he did, of course I'd take him out. Who would stand there??? Way stating the obvious.

    trust me, there are PLENTY of people who would and do.
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    kinetickinetic Posts: 148
    trust me, there are PLENTY of people who would and do.
    Amen to that.
    When you're married, you'll understand the importance of fresh produce.
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    trust me, there are PLENTY of people who would and do.

    Wow. I have never experinced that I guess. My kid is well behaved, especially if his dad is there. He's not into Disney crap and kiddie baby music. nor do we encourage that. I let him do what he wants in that regard. I introduced him to Pearl Jam a little while ago and he loves them. He asks all the time to watch the shows and for me to put it on the show. I know all about leaving places early if he were to get tired.. no big deal. I'm not worried about that. :)
    "I'll ride the wave where it takes me.."
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    voodoopugvoodoopug Posts: 1,011
    I took my son on his third birthday to see Pearl Jam at Lolla from a luxury tent/suite and he had a ball and was well behaved.
    There's Pearl Jam, The Rolling Stones, Chuck Berry, Robert Johnson......and then everybody else.
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    edvedder913edvedder913 Posts: 1,810
    Wow. I have never experinced that I guess. My kid is well behaved, especially if his dad is there. He's not into Disney crap and kiddie baby music. nor do we encourage that. I let him do what he wants in that regard. I introduced him to Pearl Jam a little while ago and he loves them. He asks all the time to watch the shows and for me to put it on the show. I know all about leaving places early if he were to get tired.. no big deal. I'm not worried about that. :)


    me neither. in the 100's of shows i have attended i have never witnessed a child throwing a tantrum or crying and the parent just standing there doing nothing about it. but then again, i have never seen a child throwing a tantrum at a show.

    my friends kid actually cried hysterically at hannah montana...where she apparently belonged. i would cry there too :D
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    me neither. in the 100's of shows i have attended i have never witnessed a child throwing a tantrum or crying and the parent just standing there doing nothing about it. but then again, i have never seen a child throwing a tantrum at a show.

    my friends kid actually cried hysterically at hannah montana...where she apparently belonged. i would cry there too :D


    we're not just talking pj shows or shows in general. we're talking out in public in general. Haven't you ever seen a kid acting up in a restaurant (probably the type of which kids or babies shouldn't even be at in the first place) and the parents just sit there? Hell haven't you ever heard a baby crying in a movie theater? It happens all the time. Good parents grab the kid, take them outside until they quiet down (or leave entirely) and apologize profusely on the way out. Bad parents just sit there.
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    edvedder913edvedder913 Posts: 1,810
    we're not just talking pj shows or shows in general. we're talking out in public in general. Haven't you ever seen a kid acting up in a restaurant (probably the type of which kids or babies shouldn't even be at in the first place) and the parents just sit there? Hell haven't you ever heard a baby crying in a movie theater? It happens all the time. Good parents grab the kid, take them outside until they quiet down (or leave entirely) and apologize profusely on the way out. Bad parents just sit there.

    since this thread is about taking your kid to a PJ show, I assumed that is what the comment referred to.
    apologize profusely? babies cry - that is life. no need to apologize.

    i also wouldn't qualify parents as good/bad based on them removing their children from public spots during a meltdown.....

    i didnt know restuaranst had age restrictions either?!?!?

    but whatever. to each his own. everyone was a baby at one time or another.
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    4Powers204Powers20 Posts: 1,219
    since this thread is about taking your kid to a PJ show, I assumed that is what the comment referred to.
    apologize profusely? babies cry - that is life. no need to apologize.

    i also wouldn't qualify parents as good/bad based on them removing their children from public spots during a meltdown.....

    i didnt know restuaranst had age restrictions either?!?!?

    but whatever. to each his own. everyone was a baby at one time or another.

    Babies cry. Exactly. People dont like to listen to babies cry. If your baby is crying in a public place where people are paying money to be(concert, movies. restaurant) it is not crazy for them to expect you to leave with you child until they are done crying.


    "We're running out of beer, too?" EV 6/19/08

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    since this thread is about taking your kid to a PJ show, I assumed that is what the comment referred to.
    apologize profusely? babies cry - that is life. no need to apologize.

    i also wouldn't qualify parents as good/bad based on them removing their children from public spots during a meltdown.....

    i didnt know restuaranst had age restrictions either?!?!?

    but whatever. to each his own. everyone was a baby at one time or another.

    not to get too off topic but...
    yeah babies do cry, that's the point. that's why you don't take babies or little children to places where adults are trying to enjoy themselves or relax. and if you do, knowing that yes, babies cry, toddlers act up, have meltdowns, or hell even if they are happy they are kids and could annoy people...then well, it's *your* responsibility to remove the child, and yes, apologize to the people you have bothered, that's all. I think there really *is* a problem in recent years of people just 1) bringing kids everywhere they don't need to be and 2) just ignoring them when they do act up and bother people. it's this huge sense of entitlement that's been going around lately.

    no restaurants don't have age restrictions, but there just are certain places where you go that the baby sitter should be called. And I'm sorry, it's inexcusable to take a baby to a movie theater. or to let little kids run around the women's locker room at the gym (that's a huge pet peeve of mine!). if you do take a kid to a more adult place, you have to be prepared to take a high level of responsibility. it's just common courtesy.
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    4Powers20 wrote:
    Babies cry. Exactly. People dont like to listen to babies cry. If your baby is crying in a public place where people are paying money to be(concert, movies. restaurant) it is not crazy for them to expect you to leave with you child until they are done crying.

    exactly. the only point I was trying to make.
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    not to get too off topic but...
    yeah babies do cry, that's the point. that's why you don't take babies or little children to places where adults are trying to enjoy themselves or relax. and if you do, knowing that yes, babies cry, toddlers act up, have meltdowns, or hell even if they are happy they are kids and could annoy people...then well, it's *your* responsibility to remove the child, and yes, apologize to the people you have bothered, that's all. I think there really *is* a problem in recent years of people just 1) bringing kids everywhere they don't need to be and 2) just ignoring them when they do act up and bother people. it's this huge sense of entitlement that's been going around lately.

    no restaurants don't have age restrictions, but there just are certain places where you go that the baby sitter should be called. And I'm sorry, it's inexcusable to take a baby to a movie theater. or to let little kids run around the women's locker room at the gym (that's a huge pet peeve of mine!). if you do take a kid to a more adult place, you have to be prepared to take a high level of responsibility. it's just common courtesy.



    LOL reading your responses tells me, you don't have kids! I'm not going to hide my child away in a corner bc he makes noise, nor am I going to let him scream his head off. I let my child be a child! i'm not embarrased when he acts like one or cries or gets upset. That's a part of life. I'm sure not going to apologize to all the poor adults who have to endure my child making some noise! But like I said, at a concert, of course I'd take him out or away so that people can hear the music.

    Do you expect loud drunk obnoxius people who spill their beer on you and scream in your ear to apologize and stand outside too??? LOL.
    "I'll ride the wave where it takes me.."
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    Get_RightGet_Right Posts: 12,479
    LOL reading your responses tells me, you don't have kids! I'm not going to hide my child away in a corner bc he makes noise, nor am I going to let him scream his head off. I let my child be a child! i'm not embarrased when he acts like one or cries or gets upset. That's a part of life. I'm sure not going to apologize to all the poor adults who have to endure my child making some noise! But like I said, at a concert, of course I'd take him out or away so that people can hear the music.

    Do you expect loud drunk obnoxius people who spill their beer on you and scream in your ear to apologize and stand outside too??? LOL.


    EXACTLY
    People without kids are generally less tolerant of them-perfect example here

    the solution is to try and teach them to behave at the time the crying happens, and to teach them to sit properly at a restaurant. Hard to do in when your not sitting at your table.

    you are free to go someplace else if the crying bothers you, it is a public place after all-see how that works


    that being said, I still dont think an arena rock show is the right place for a three year old-the risks simply outweigh the benefits IMHO
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    edvedder913edvedder913 Posts: 1,810
    .

    Do you expect loud drunk obnoxius people who spill their beer on you and scream in your ear to apologize and stand outside too??? LOL.

    and the person next to you screaming in your effing ear thru the whole show?!?!?!?!?

    so if your baby is crying in a restuarant - or any other public place - where adults "are enjoying themselves" - should you remove them even if it's pouring rain out?

    "look at that mother outside in the thunder storm with her baby - what a bad mother - she should be inside" LMAO

    so kids can't go see Horton Hears a who? they should be prohibited from theaters too....lol

    wait - maybe we can have a separate planet for those with chikldren so they are more formally accepted in places where adults may want to enjoy themselves.....ie OUT IN PUBLIC

    should they not be allowed at baseball games? hockey games? b/c adults cannot control themselves and they spill beer at yell bad words? i guess they shouldn't be expected to go see their favorite team play either, since you know - adults pay to enjoy themselves there.

    seems like a BAN CHILDREN campaign to me....lol where do you draw the line?
    kids should not be in places that have age restrictions and do not allow kids. it's pretty simple. everywhere else is public and free reign...
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    my friends and i went to see the Eagles, back in HS, circa 1994, and we were the youngest there by far....we lit up a joint, and got ATTACKED by all the old farts around us. They yelled at us and made us put it out. At least if I'm not smoking cuz of a kid, it's legit. Old people? c'mon, have you never smelled pot before?!?
    "Find myself singing the same songs every day....
    ones that make me feel good when things behind the smile ain't ok...." -Hoon
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    4Powers204Powers20 Posts: 1,219
    LOL reading your responses tells me, you don't have kids! I'm not going to hide my child away in a corner bc he makes noise, nor am I going to let him scream his head off. I let my child be a child! i'm not embarrased when he acts like one or cries or gets upset. That's a part of life. I'm sure not going to apologize to all the poor adults who have to endure my child making some noise! But like I said, at a concert, of course I'd take him out or away so that people can hear the music.

    Do you expect loud drunk obnoxius people who spill their beer on you and scream in your ear to apologize and stand outside too??? LOL.

    wow. so you would take your kid to a restaurant or a movie and if he starts crying you would just say its a kid being a kid and everyone else should just deal with it? that is pretty selfish.


    "We're running out of beer, too?" EV 6/19/08

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    Get_RightGet_Right Posts: 12,479
    and the person next to you screaming in your effing ear thru the whole show?!?!?!?!?

    so if your baby is crying in a restuarant - or any other public place - where adults "are enjoying themselves" - should you remove them even if it's pouring rain out?

    "look at that mother outside in the thunder storm with her baby - what a bad mother - she should be inside" LMAO

    so kids can't go see Horton Hears a who? they should be prohibited from theaters too....lol

    wait - maybe we can have a separate planet for those with chikldren so they are more formally accepted in places where adults may want to enjoy themselves.....ie OUT IN PUBLIC

    should they not be allowed at baseball games? hockey games? b/c adults cannot control themselves and they spill beer at yell bad words? i guess they shouldn't be expected to go see their favorite team play either, since you know - adults pay to enjoy themselves there.

    seems like a BAN CHILDREN campaign to me....lol where do you draw the line?
    kids should not be in places that have age restrictions and do not allow kids. it's pretty simple. everywhere else is public and free reign...

    Is/was your father a professor or something?
    well said

    ;)
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    edvedder913edvedder913 Posts: 1,810
    and just for the record if my kid cried during a movie, i would remove him and bring him back once he was calmed.

    BUT I would NOT feel obliged to "profusely apologize to anyone" - IT IS LIFE

    I am fortunate - I think my son has made 1-2 public scenes in his life. he is far better behaved than most adults.
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    4Powers204Powers20 Posts: 1,219


    so kids can't go see Horton Hears a who? they should be prohibited from theaters too....lol

    ...

    horton hears a who is a kids movie, completely different.

    if you take your child to Evan Almighty (i picked it because it's not a kids movie but parents would probably think thier kids could handle, not because I think it is a good movie) and they start crying you would just stay there?


    "We're running out of beer, too?" EV 6/19/08

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