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Should I ask her out?

Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
edited January 2013 in All Encompassing Trip
I've known her for a long time but haven't seen her in a very long time.
Only contact we have is occasional Facebook chat.
She invited me last year to a dinner she organised but due to falling out with some of the other guests I didn't go.
Last year when she invited me she said it's been a long time since she's seen me and thought she'd invite me.
I kind of got a feeling all these years she had a crush on me to, just some of the things she would do....
I have always had a crush on her but didn't go further because am/was friends with her brother (he's kinda disappeared so not sure if he is mad at me and doesn't want to be my friend no more) and going out with a friends sister is a big no no.

Should I just take a brave chance and ask her via Facebook if she wants to catch up over coffee?
Or should I wait until we chat next online and ask her then instead of just randomly messaging her online?
Would it be creepy just to message her when she isn't online?
Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • rollingsrollings unknown Posts: 7,125
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    I've known her for a long time but haven't seen her in a very long time.
    Only contact we have is occasional Facebook chat.
    She invited me last year to a dinner she organised but due to falling out with some of the other guests I didn't go.
    Last year when she invited me she said it's been a long time since she's seen me and thought she'd invite me.
    I kind of got a feeling all these years she had a crush on me to, just some of the things she would do....
    I have always had a crush on her but didn't go further because am/was friends with her brother (he's kinda disappeared so not sure if he is mad at me and doesn't want to be my friend no more) and going out with a friends sister is a big no no.

    Should I just take a brave chance and ask her via Facebook if she wants to catch up over coffee?
    Or should I wait until we chat next online and ask her then instead of just randomly messaging her online?
    Would it be creepy just to message her when she isn't online?

    how often do you chat online?
  • rollingsrollings unknown Posts: 7,125
    on second thought, yes, and do it right now
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    rollings wrote:
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    I've known her for a long time but haven't seen her in a very long time.
    Only contact we have is occasional Facebook chat.
    She invited me last year to a dinner she organised but due to falling out with some of the other guests I didn't go.
    Last year when she invited me she said it's been a long time since she's seen me and thought she'd invite me.
    I kind of got a feeling all these years she had a crush on me to, just some of the things she would do....
    I have always had a crush on her but didn't go further because am/was friends with her brother (he's kinda disappeared so not sure if he is mad at me and doesn't want to be my friend no more) and going out with a friends sister is a big no no.

    Should I just take a brave chance and ask her via Facebook if she wants to catch up over coffee?
    Or should I wait until we chat next online and ask her then instead of just randomly messaging her online?
    Would it be creepy just to message her when she isn't online?

    how often do you chat online?

    Every so often, not daily or weekly.
    If I see her online I will initiate the conversation, she is rarely on chat and when she is she is busy, she never initiates online chat so I doubt she is into me at times, confusing.
    However she would always be happy seeing me in person. :?
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • peacefrompaulpeacefrompaul Posts: 25,293
    Yep! Go for it!
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    I've typed up my message but too chicken shit to hit the send button.
    I've always chickened out in life when it comes to girls. :fp:
    I guess that is what an anxiety disorder does to the mind.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • the wolfthe wolf Posts: 7,027
    better to regret asking and her saying no, then to regret not asking her and never knowing.
    Peace, Love.

    "To question your government is not unpatriotic --
    to not question your government is unpatriotic."
    -- Sen. Chuck Hagel
  • peacefrompaulpeacefrompaul Posts: 25,293
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    I've typed up my message but too chicken shit to hit the send button.
    I've always chickened out in life when it comes to girls. :fp:
    I guess that is what an anxiety disorder does to the mind.

    You just asked her out to coffee for catching up right?

    Hit the send button
  • the wolfthe wolf Posts: 7,027
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    I've typed up my message but too chicken shit to hit the send button.
    I've always chickened out in life when it comes to girls. :fp:
    I guess that is what an anxiety disorder does to the mind.

    bullshit, hit that send button!
    Peace, Love.

    "To question your government is not unpatriotic --
    to not question your government is unpatriotic."
    -- Sen. Chuck Hagel
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    peacefrompaul wrote:
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    I've typed up my message but too chicken shit to hit the send button.
    I've always chickened out in life when it comes to girls. :fp:
    I guess that is what an anxiety disorder does to the mind.

    You just asked her out to coffee for catching up right?

    Hit the send button

    Coffee or after work drinks seeing we work around the city or do something at a mall.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • peacefrompaulpeacefrompaul Posts: 25,293
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    peacefrompaul wrote:
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    I've typed up my message but too chicken shit to hit the send button.
    I've always chickened out in life when it comes to girls. :fp:
    I guess that is what an anxiety disorder does to the mind.

    You just asked her out to coffee for catching up right?

    Hit the send button

    Coffee or after work drinks seeing we work around the city or do something at a mall.

    PERFECT

    Send away
  • dimitrispearljamdimitrispearljam Posts: 139,721
    the wolf wrote:
    better to regret asking and her saying no, then to regret not asking her and never knowing.
    "...Dimitri...He talks to me...'.."The Ghost of Greece..".
    "..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
    “..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    dimitrispearljam wrote:
    the wolf wrote:
    better to regret asking and her saying no, then to regret not asking her and never knowing.

    I know I know, I always wonder I might miss a golden opportunity here, she is very attractive.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • STAYSEASTAYSEA Posts: 3,814
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    I've known her for a long time but haven't seen her in a very long time.
    Only contact we have is occasional Facebook chat.
    She invited me last year to a dinner she organised but due to falling out with some of the other guests I didn't go.
    Last year when she invited me she said it's been a long time since she's seen me and thought she'd invite me.
    I kind of got a feeling all these years she had a crush on me to, just some of the things she would do....
    I have always had a crush on her but didn't go further because am/was friends with her brother (he's kinda disappeared so not sure if he is mad at me and doesn't want to be my friend no more) and going out with a friends sister is a big no no.

    Should I just take a brave chance and ask her via Facebook if she wants to catch up over coffee?
    Or should I wait until we chat next online and ask her then instead of just randomly messaging her online?
    Would it be creepy just to message her when she isn't online?


    Can you use GTALK? It's better. Green means GO.
    My brother told his friends DON'T EVEN LOOK AT MY SISTER! I would ask your friend. Personally, I would never date my little brothers friends, I'm just polite to them. But, every situation is unique.
    image
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yeah it might backfire, her brother might want to punch my head in.
    But he has known me for a long time, he knows I am no creep and would treat her good.
    I am surprised she has been single all this time, she is 25.
    I also didn't think a relationship would work back then, she is big on partying, I just want to settle down and do chilled out 28 yr old things.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • the wolfthe wolf Posts: 7,027
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    Yeah it might backfire, her brother might want to punch my head in.
    But he has known me for a long time, he knows I am no creep and would treat her good.
    I am surprised she has been single all this time, she is 25.
    I also didn't think a relationship would work back then, she is big on partying, I just want to settle down and do chilled out 28 yr old things.

    Just do it man. For real, the brother will understand.
    Peace, Love.

    "To question your government is not unpatriotic --
    to not question your government is unpatriotic."
    -- Sen. Chuck Hagel
  • 8181 Needing a ride to Forest Hills and a ounce of weed. Please inquire within. Thanks. Or not. Posts: 58,276
    Pics?



    I'd wait till she was online and then ask her then, but i would ask her.

    Either way, no risk no reward.
    81 is now off the air

    Off_Air.jpg
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Only downside she is a RnB chick lol
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    81 wrote:
    Pics?



    I'd wait till she was online and then ask her then, but i would ask her.

    You think it'd be creepy if she wasn't online or..?
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • STAYSEASTAYSEA Posts: 3,814
    ASK HER BROTHER, FIRST.

    Siblings are honest and very direct, usually.
    image
  • donnaruhldonnaruhl Posts: 2,157
    Sound's to me that yuo're weighing out the odd's by explaining the why I shouldn't.I think Wolf was right, You'll never know either way unless you ask.It's all casual. Now had you asked her years ago when you had the crush on her it probably would have scared you for some time. So just hit send. :)
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    donnaruhl wrote:
    Sound's to me that yuo're weighing out the odd's by explaining the why I shouldn't.I think Wolf was right, You'll never know either way unless you ask.It's all casual. Now had you asked her years ago when you had the crush on her it probably would have scared you for some time. So just hit send. :)

    Held onto how I feel from her for a long time.
    Kept it locked in me.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    STAYSEA wrote:
    ASK HER BROTHER, FIRST.

    Siblings are honest and very direct, usually.

    If it's just a catch up over coffee or whatever it's not like I am going out with her right?
    If it were to go to another level then I'd tell her brother.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • STAYSEASTAYSEA Posts: 3,814
    edited January 2013
    I suppose Female opinions don't count.

    :roll:

    Just Coffee!
    But The Bro is your friend... If it goes farther. Just ask him. She could be a flake?
    Casual.
    PM if it goes nutz
    Post edited by STAYSEA on
    image
  • donnaruhldonnaruhl Posts: 2,157
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    Only downside she is a RnB chick lol

    You are telling us about the con's but you're not telling us the pro's. You need to weight this out in your own mind.
    What do you have in common?
  • 8181 Needing a ride to Forest Hills and a ounce of weed. Please inquire within. Thanks. Or not. Posts: 58,276
    If the brother is sort of out of the picture, fuck him.
    81 is now off the air

    Off_Air.jpg
  • 8181 Needing a ride to Forest Hills and a ounce of weed. Please inquire within. Thanks. Or not. Posts: 58,276
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    Only downside she is a RnB chick lol
    Who cares, this isnt about a wedding, its about going on a date
    81 is now off the air

    Off_Air.jpg
  • SD48277SD48277 Posts: 12,243
    Ask her!
    ELITIST FUK
  • iOnlyownMymindiOnlyownMymind Posts: 2,885
    I think I'm probably as chicken as you, but there's no harm in going out for coffee. I don't think I'd worry about the brother either unless he's super defensive about her.
  • the wolfthe wolf Posts: 7,027
    81 wrote:
    Thoughts_Arrive wrote:
    Only downside she is a RnB chick lol
    Who cares, this isnt about a wedding, its about going on a date

    This.
    Peace, Love.

    "To question your government is not unpatriotic --
    to not question your government is unpatriotic."
    -- Sen. Chuck Hagel
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    STAYSEA wrote:
    I suppose Female opinions don't count.

    :roll:

    Just Coffee!
    But The Bro is your friend... If it goes farther. Just ask him. She could be a flake?
    Casual.
    PM if it goes nutz

    I haven't spoken to her brother in over a year now, wouldn't say he's a friend if he's stopped calling me.
    I didn't say your opinion don't count, I just disagree sorry.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
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