Tips for surviving in office environment

81

hide some creamer for emergecy outtages.

shep

81 wrote:

hide some creamer for emergecy outtages.

I bring in milk from home... and clearly mark the container!

It's all good.

BinauralJam

Make sure nobody but you can see your screen!

Delete all personal e-mails before leaving everyday

Stop by the security office, chat'em up, and check out where the camera's are focused, find the blind spot.

An hidden emergency bottle of alcohol is a good idea.

Save every e-mail your boss send you and you send them, Cover Your Ass because if the shit hits the fan no matter how cool your boss seems they will throw you under the bus.

81

BinauralJam wrote:

Make sure nobody but you can see your screen!

Delete all personal e-mails before leaving everyday

Stop by the security office, chat'em up, and check out where the camera's are focused, find the blind spot.

An hidden emergency bottle of alcohol is a good idea.

Save every e-mail your boss send you and you send them, Cover Your Ass because if the shit hits the fan no matter how cool your boss seems they will throw you under the bus.

check

never send personal email from work address...bad...

check...although i know where the camera's are located.

need

check....until IT yells at me for having to big of an outlook file.

81

nose plugs

kw18

81 wrote:

nose plugs

Good call! There's quite often some funky smells that lurk around this office ...

I work with a guy who wears ear plugs in an office you could hear a pin drop. :roll: He's such a whack job.

81

kw18 wrote:

81 wrote:

nose plugs

Good call! There's quite often some funky smells that lurk around this office ...

I work with a guy who wears ear plugs in an office you could hear a pin drop. :roll: He's such a whack job.

never seen ear plugs

shep

81 wrote:

kw18 wrote:

81 wrote:

nose plugs

Good call! There's quite often some funky smells that lurk around this office ...

I work with a guy who wears ear plugs in an office you could hear a pin drop. :roll: He's such a whack job.

never seen ear plugs

Only use 'em about once or twice a month, but they're in my desk.


Lock your desk drawers every night.

Clearly label - permanently - everything you bring in from home that has the potential to be lifted, shifted, or relocated when you're not looking.

DS1119

BinauralJam wrote:

Save every e-mail your boss send you and you send them, Cover Your Ass because if the shit hits the fan no matter how cool your boss seems they will throw you under the bus.

Absolfuckinglutely.

RKCNDY

shep wrote:

81 wrote:

hide some creamer for emergecy outtages.

I bring in milk from home... and clearly mark the container!

It's all good.

I did that with my hot sauce...AND I would put a fresh label around the cap so I could tell if people used it. They still did. :x

shep wrote:

Clearly label - permanently - everything you bring in from home that has the potential to be lifted, shifted, or relocated when you're not looking.

Anything that can be lifted went into my desk drawer, and then I locked it. I NEVER left my desk drawers unlocked, even when I was sitting there (I had people steal shit when I got up to use the restroom), kept my desk key on the lanyard that was attached to my ID badge.

Any 'potentially weird' conversation I had with anybody, I would write down what was said, and dated it with the time. (this saved my ass, and enabled me to listen to the unemployment judge yell and demean my former boss and former HR rep-damn that felt great!)

Never be friends with ANYBODY that you work with...think "everybody is a snitch"-if you must, set up a 'work FB' account, and have ONLY people from work on it.

Never talk about what you do outside the office, people will find ways to make you look bad.

81

RKCNDY wrote:

Never be friends with ANYBODY that you work with...think "everybody is a snitch"-if you must, set up a 'work FB' account, and have ONLY people from work on it.

Never talk about what you do outside the office, people will find ways to make you look bad.

a. never accept a coworker as a fb friend. that is what linkedin is for.

b. you worked in a shitty job. wow.

Mamasan23

My co-worker and I step outside the office when we need to talk about our bosses as we're both insanely paranoid that they have us bugged.

RKCNDY

81 wrote:

RKCNDY wrote:

Never be friends with ANYBODY that you work with...think "everybody is a snitch"-if you must, set up a 'work FB' account, and have ONLY people from work on it.

Never talk about what you do outside the office, people will find ways to make you look bad.

a. never accept a coworker as a fb friend. that is what linkedin is for.

b. you worked in a bunch of shitty jobs. wow.

fixed

kw18

Wow. Suddenly my workplace doesn't seem so bad ...

LloydXmas

stay off youporn

81

LloydXmas wrote:

stay off youporn

God bless the smart phone

PJ-Cubs

Never eat any unwrapped food from the leftover food table. Especially the half donut or bagel someone left there. I have seen how many people don't wash their hands on the bathroom and I want no part of food that they have handled

peacefrompaul

RKCNDY wrote:

Anything that can be lifted went into my desk drawer, and then I locked it. I NEVER left my desk drawers unlocked, even when I was sitting there (I had people steal shit when I got up to use the restroom), kept my desk key on the lanyard that was attached to my ID badge.

Any 'potentially weird' conversation I had with anybody, I would write down what was said, and dated it with the time. (this saved my ass, and enabled me to listen to the unemployment judge yell and demean my former boss and former HR rep-damn that felt great!)

Never be friends with ANYBODY that you work with...think "everybody is a snitch"-if you must, set up a 'work FB' account, and have ONLY people from work on it.

Never talk about what you do outside the office, people will find ways to make you look bad.

Sounds like the worst job ever

rick1zoo2

learn how to fart quietly

madtowndave

Make tasty food and bring it into the office when no one expects it


Also, bringing your bosses limited run beer doesn't hurt

81

rick1zoo2 wrote:

learn how to fart quietly

Fuck that....i'll fart as i please

Bless the office

madtowndave

81 wrote:

rick1zoo2 wrote:

learn how to fart quietly

Fuck that....i'll fart as i please

Bless the office

+1

It's my office, and I'll fart when I goddamn want to.

JOEJOEJOE

If you get away with certain things, don't complain when others do too!

PJ-Cubs

rick1zoo2 wrote:

learn how to fart quietly

... and then casually leave the area

cutz

Get a job where you don't work in an office>

hgpjam11

Have a couple of friends to call "squrrel" for you - When an annoying person is talking to you for more than 3 minutes, your friend will call your phone so you can politely excuse yourself for an important call. At least once a day, someone saves me from endless chatter.

The Juggler

space heaters are prohibited.

81

The Juggler wrote:

space heaters are prohibited.

no they aren't

they also tell us we need one of the stupid plastic floor mats under our chairs.....i don't think so tim....it goes under one of my visitor chairs

The Juggler

81 wrote:

The Juggler wrote:

space heaters are prohibited.

no they aren't

they also tell us we need one of the stupid plastic floor mats under our chairs.....i don't think so tim....it goes under one of my visitor chairs

at my old company, we had an office manager lady that we called The Space Heater Nazi.

this chick was DETERMINED not to let any space heaters into her office. NOT ON HER WATCH.

she emailed out the "space heater policy" at least twice a year (early fall and middle of the winter usually). and she would also inspect everyone's work spaces multiple times a year.

i admired her tenacity.

81

The Juggler wrote:

81 wrote:

The Juggler wrote:

space heaters are prohibited.

no they aren't

they also tell us we need one of the stupid plastic floor mats under our chairs.....i don't think so tim....it goes under one of my visitor chairs

at my old company, we had an office manager lady that we called The Space Heater Nazi.

this chick was DETERMINED not to let any space heaters into her office. NOT ON HER WATCH.

she emailed out the "space heater policy" at least twice a year (early fall and middle of the winter usually). and she would also inspect everyone's work spaces multiple times a year.

i admired her tenacity.

the bitch

gotta rebel against that shit....

about 2 years ago, they started a you gotta swipe your key card in teh AM...regardless if the doors are opened or shut so that they can track if you swiped at all.....

so first day in, i'm walking in, and the hr office assistant is behind me....i don't swipe and she says you gott a swipe...i said no....and kept walking.

right around 11:30 i get an email CC'd to my boss about it...saying i better get with the program... kicker is, nobody ever once asked why....perhaps i had forgotten my card. my boss never said a word about it then or during my review hr guy is long gone....never trust hr, they are evil

guess i should read up on our space heater policy...thought it was banned, but everyone has one....windows leak like a mother

morello

BinauralJam wrote:

Delete all personal e-mails before leaving everyday

I am a compulsive deleter. Any personal e-mails get deleted + the sent e-mails deleted too. It's stupid coz I know they can retrieve the from the server but delete, delete, delete!