Question for the men

norm

81 wrote:

ok...here is what we are going to do...take your phone and put your bluetooth ear piece in...before the date...give me a call...

i'll listen in, and give you advice as the date moves along.

smokingbaby de bergerac

_

I think I'm going to choose Thursday at 11. Only, I have class at 1:15. But that's good, right? If I don't have too much time for him right away? :?

I don't know what I'm going to wear!! I've been worrying about that since Friday! I have blue eyes, so I'm thinking I'll wear a blue top. Otherwise, I'm horrible with fashion. Not only do I not know what's in fashion, but I don't know what looks good on me and what doesn't. I'm thinking I don't want to wear jeans, though, since I'll be coming from work. I actually do wear jeans to work, but I'd like to present myself as being a little more professional than that. :oops:

And I don't know what I'm going to say! I'm worried about accidentally spilling it that I know more about him than I've let on. I'm not sure how to tell him I think he's really interesting, because how would I know he's interesting just from seeing him at karaoke? But I don't want him to think I just like him for his looks and his voice and because he's funny. Personally, I'm much more receptive to men who like me because they think I'm interesting, but maybe guys aren't that way. :?

And I REALLY don't know what to do about seeing him again. I'm sure I'll want to, but I don't want to be pushy or whatever. What's the advisory board consensus on this?

Thank you!

_

norm wrote:

81 wrote:

ok...here is what we are going to do...take your phone and put your bluetooth ear piece in...before the date...give me a call...

i'll listen in, and give you advice as the date moves along.

smokingbaby de bergerac

81

go try on 10 outfits....take pictures and post em

just ask questions about general stuff..music, movies, travel,pets, etc.... keep it light and fluffy.

mfc2006

81 wrote:

fluffy.

this is the key word.

ZiggyStar

_ wrote:

I think I'm going to choose Thursday at 11. Only, I have class at 1:15. But that's good, right? If I don't have too much time for him right away? :?

Well, it is only coffee....which is normally about say an hour or so? But what if things are flowing and you're both feeling good and two hours flies by? Why limit your time like that? What if coffee leads to lunch? And you have to say no because of class?

_ wrote:

I don't know what I'm going to wear!! I've been worrying about that since Friday! I have blue eyes, so I'm thinking I'll wear a blue top. Otherwise, I'm horrible with fashion. Not only do I not know what's in fashion, but I don't know what looks good on me and what doesn't. I'm thinking I don't want to wear jeans, though, since I'll be coming from work. I actually do wear jeans to work, but I'd like to present myself as being a little more professional than that. :oops:

It doesn't matter about what's in fashion....but surely you know if something looks good on you or not? Can't you tell by looking at photos of yourself? Don't you ever think "Damn I look pretty good in that!" I know I do!

What do you feel comfortable in? Long skirts....short skirts....pants....jeans? Do you have good legs? Good arse? Nice collarbone/decolletage/boobs? You've got to accentuate your good body parts.

_ wrote:

And I don't know what I'm going to say! I'm worried about accidentally spilling it that I know more about him than I've let on. I'm not sure how to tell him I think he's really interesting, because how would I know he's interesting just from seeing him at karaoke? But I don't want him to think I just like him for his looks and his voice and because he's funny. Personally, I'm much more receptive to men who like me because they think I'm interesting, but maybe guys aren't that way. :?

I wouldn't worry about "telling" him he's interesting. SHOW him by how you respond to his stories etc. He'll know by how you react as to whether you are interested or bored....or whether you just like him because of his looks etc. Try not to overthink this shit.

_ wrote:

And I REALLY don't know what to do about seeing him again. I'm sure I'll want to, but I don't want to be pushy or whatever. What's the advisory board consensus on this?

Thank you!

I'd say at the end "That was fun. Want to catch up for another coffee next week?" And he might say "Sure....or dinner/movie/other event" or just say yes to another coffee. I wouldn't be jumping down his throat trying to secure a proper "date". Keep it casual.

Pamela0222

I don't know what I'm going to wear!! I've been worrying about that since Friday! I have blue eyes, so I'm thinking I'll wear a blue top. Otherwise, I'm horrible with fashion. Not only do I not know what's in fashion, but I don't know what looks good on me and what doesn't. I'm thinking I don't want to wear jeans, though, since I'll be coming from work. I actually do wear jeans to work, but I'd like to present myself as being a little more professional than that.

Since you wear jeans to work, why don't you wear a nice pair of jeans, a nice fitted white top (to bring out your blue eyes) and a blazer over top, with simple accessories. That why you'll look nice for work and perfectly casual for a coffee date!

Let the conversation flow. Don't put too much thought into it, it'll feel forced that way. Just get to know each other, and have FUN!

Carey

I am loving the answers from these women, we are taking over the 'question for the men' thread and I think its a good thing
Great outfit choice by Pamela, and I like Ziggy's idea about not limiting time (but an excuse to need to leave is never a bad idea in case he is a creep).
I also like the 'show him you are interested' idea instead of telling him. Don't tell him. Just ask plenty of questions. Most dudes love to talk about themselves :roll:
You should walk away from the date knowing MORE about HIM than he knows about YOU.

HAVE FUN!!!!!!!!

Heisenberg

_ wrote:

I don't know what I'm going to wear!!!

One word...cleavage

RKCNDY

i would be the one who would be asking funny questions to 'break the ice'

"So, you up for any karaoke nominations?"

or

"What's your favorite song to sing at karaoke?" <

---

that could lead to 'oh, so are you a big 80s fan?' (why do people always sing 80s songs?)

ask him about hobbies, music, movies, food, TV shows...pop culture. Stay away from political/religious platforms (I know you're AMT person-just hold back a little on the coffee meeting 'k? )

norm

Heisenberg wrote:

_ wrote:

I don't know what I'm going to wear!!!

One word...cleavage

even mr sensitive pony tail guy would agree on this

RKCNDY

norm wrote:

Heisenberg wrote:

_ wrote:

I don't know what I'm going to wear!!!

One word...cleavage

even mr sensitive pony tail guy would agree on this

what if he plays for the other team? :shock:

Heisenberg

RKCNDY wrote:

what if he plays for the other team? :shock:

Then _ can convert him like Elaine did on Seinfeld. "We need a shortstop...reeeeeeeaaaaaal bad"

_

RKCNDY wrote:

i would be the one who would be asking funny questions to 'break the ice'

"So, you up for any karaoke nominations?"

or

"What's your favorite song to sing at karaoke?" <

---

that could lead to 'oh, so are you a big 80s fan?' (why do people always sing 80s songs?)

ask him about hobbies, music, movies, food, TV shows...pop culture. Stay away from political/religious platforms (I know you're AMT person-just hold back a little on the coffee meeting 'k? )

I know; I've thought about this. I'll have to make a conscious effort to avoid asking his opinion on abortion rights & healthcare reform. What about just wearing my "I pro-choice boys" shirt... too soon?

pjl44

I think I check on this thread five times a day. Watching this play out is fascinating.

I definitely wouldn't bring up anything besides the karaoke evening and maybe what your friends mentioned. We've all been there when it comes to plugging someone into Google, but it could still be slightly off-putting to hear. After all, it's a great opportunity to ask questions. And how exciting is it that you already know you'll like the answers?

Heisenberg

pjl44 wrote:

I think I check on this thread five times a day. Watching this play out is fascinating.

Agreed. _ has provided us with our own little 10c soap opera. We want a full 1500 word write up after the big event

mfc2006

Heisenberg wrote:

pjl44 wrote:

I think I check on this thread five times a day. Watching this play out is fascinating.

Agreed. _ has provided us with our own little 10c soap opera. We want a full 1500 word write up after the big event

:thumbup:

81

81 wrote:

go try on 10 outfits....take pictures and post em

:x

mfc2006

81 wrote:

81 wrote:

go try on 10 outfits....take pictures and post em

:x

fluffy

pjl44

mfc2006 wrote:

Heisenberg wrote:

pjl44 wrote:

I think I check on this thread five times a day. Watching this play out is fascinating.

Agreed. _ has provided us with our own little 10c soap opera. We want a full 1500 word write up after the big event

:thumbup:

Imagine if they wound up getting married? I realize that's like discussing the Hall of Fame chances for a 17-year-old Venezuelan shortstop, but still.