Ron Burgundy: I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly...
The whole opening scene is brilliant ... "Maybe next time don't wear a bra" ... "The arsonist was denied a bank loan" ... "You name's Lanolin? Lanolin? Like ... sheeps wool?" ... "AUDREY!!! THIS IS BUSH LEAGUE!!!"
"You're one of the few Red Sox fans I don't mind." - Newch91
"I don't believe in damn curses. Wake up the damn Bambino and have me face him. Maybe I'll drill him in the ass." --- Pedro Martinez
Raoul Duke: Well? What are your plans?
Dr. Gonzo: Plans?
Raoul Duke: The child in the bedroom.
Dr. Gonzo: Oh, Lucy. I met her on the plane. Yeah, she's a religious freak. I gave her a cap before I realized... Jesus, she's never even had a drink before.
Raoul Duke: Well... It'll probably work out. We can keep her loaded and peddle her ass at the drug convention. Yeah. She's perfect for this gig. These cops will go fifty bucks a head to beat her into submission and then gang fuck her. We can set her up in one of these back street motels, hang pictures of Jesus all over the room, then turn these fucking pigs loose on her. Hell, she's strong, man. She'll hold her own.
Dr. Gonzo: Jesus Christ. I knew you were sick but I never expected to hear you actually say that kind of stuff, you filthy bastard.
Raoul Duke: Straight economics man. This girl is a God-send. Shit, she can make us a grand a day.
Dr. Gonzo: That's ugly, man. Stop talking like that.
Raoul Duke: I figure she can do about four at a time. If we keep her full of acid that's more like two grand a day. Maybe three.
Dr. Gonzo: Hold on, man. What if I just jump you and beat the dog shit out of you? Would that make you feel better? You filthy bastard.
Raoul Duke: Alright listen to me. In a few hours, she'll probably be sane enough to work herself into some kind of towering Jesus-based rage at the hazy recollection of being seduced by some kind of cruel Samoan who fed her liquor and LSD, dragged her to a Vegas hotel room and then savagely penetrated every orifice in her little body with his throbbing, uncircumcised member.
Dr. Gonzo: That's so ugly, man!
Raoul Duke: Fuck. Truth hurts.
Dr. Gonzo: That's, argh! Argh! That's argh! Argh! That's argh!
Raoul Duke: Argh!
Dr. Gonzo: I wanted to help her, man.
Raoul Duke: Well, you'll go straight to the gas chamber for this one. And even if you manage to beat that, they'll still send you back to Nevada for rape and consensual sodomy. She's got to go.
Dr. Gonzo: Shit. It doesn't pay to try to help someone these days.
Sam Kinison in Back To School (1986) - I wasn't here in a class room, hoping I was right, thinking about it. I was up to my knees in rice paddies, with guns that didn't work! Going in there, looking for Charlie, slugging it out with him; While pussies like you were back here partying, putting headbands on, doing drugs, and listening to the goddamn Beatle albums! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Waiter: Excuse me sir, you are a member of the club?
Fletch: No, I'm here with the Underhills.
Waiter: The Underhills? They are left, Señor.
Fletch: Oh they'll be back. He went out for his urinalysis.
Waiter: Would you like to order something, sir? I will put it on the Underhills' bill.
Fletch: Oh, yes. Very well. I'll have a Bloody Mary, a steak sandwich and a...steak sandwich.
Dr. Joseph Dolan: Drop your shorts and bend over.
Fletch: No...we don't have to, I mean, maybe I just haven't been doing enough calisthenics...you know, my kidneys feel a lot better now, maybe if I just bent over like this every morning......
[Dolan inserts his finger into Fletch's anus with an audible "pop" sound]
Fletch: [singing] Moon River......[talking] Whew...ever serve time, Doc?
Dr. Joseph Dolan: Breathe easy.
Fletch: Yeah...breathe easy... Ahh!! Using the whole fist, Doc?!
...
[After the proctological exam]
Dr. Joseph Dolan: Well, I can't seem to find anything wrong with you, Mr. Babar.
Fletch: Well, I'm sure it's not for a lack of looking.
Sam Kinison in Back To School (1986) - I wasn't here in a class room, hoping I was right, thinking about it. I was up to my knees in rice paddies, with guns that didn't work! Going in there, looking for Charlie, slugging it out with him; While pussies like you were back here partying, putting headbands on, doing drugs, and listening to the goddamn Beatle albums! Oh! Oh! Oh!
well mr. helper, you remember that thing called the korean conflict where we failed to achieve victory. how come we didn't push those rice eaters over the great wall of china and nuke them into the fuckin stone age? Say it! Say it!
Reading 2004
Albany 2006 Camden 2006 E. Rutherford 2, 2006 Inglewood 2006,
Chicago 2007
Camden 2008 MSG 2008 MSG 2008 Hartford 2008.
Seattle 2009 Seattle 2009 Philadelphia 2009,Philadelphia 2009 Philadelphia 2009
Hartford 2010 MSG 2010 MSG 2010
Toronto 2011,Toronto 2011
Wrigley Field 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Philadelphia 2, 2013
Philadelphia 1, 2016 Philadelphia 2 2016 New York 2016 New York 2016 Fenway 1, 2016 Fenway 2, 2018 MSG 2022 St. Paul, 1, St. Paul 2 2023 MSG 2024, MSG 2024 Philadelphia 2024
"I play good, hard-nosed basketball.
Things happen in the game. Nothing you
can do. I don't go and say,
"I'm gonna beat this guy up."
and fuck me if I say somethin you dont wanna hear, fuck me!
and fuck me if you only hear what you wanna hear
fuck me...if I care...but im not leavin here
Psycho: The name's Francis Sawyer, but everybody calls me Psycho. Any of you guys call me Francis, and I'll kill you.
Leon: ooooooooooooh.
Psycho: You just made the list, buddy ....... and I don't like nobody touching my stuff. So just keep your meat-hooks off. If I catch any of you guys in my stuff ..... I'll kill you. Also, I don't like nobody touching me. Now, any of you homos touch me, and I'll kill you.
Sergeant Hulka: Lighten up, Francis.
"You're one of the few Red Sox fans I don't mind." - Newch91
"I don't believe in damn curses. Wake up the damn Bambino and have me face him. Maybe I'll drill him in the ass." --- Pedro Martinez
Jack Woltz: you listen to me, you smooth-talking son-of-a-bitch, let me lay it on the line for you and your boss, whoever he is! Johnny Fontane will never get that movie! I don't care how many dago guinea wop greaseball goombahs come out of the woodwork!
Tom Hagen: I'm German-Irish.
Jack Woltz: Well, let me tell you something, my kraut-mick friend, I'm gonna make so much trouble for you, you won t know what hit you
Had my eyes peeled both wide open, and I got a glimpse
Of my innocence... got back my inner sense...
First, take a big step back... and literally, FUCK YOUR OWN FACE! I don't know what kind of pan-pacific bullshit power play you're trying to pull here, but Asia Jack is my territory. So whatever you're thinking, you'd better think again! Otherwise I'm gonna have to head down there and I will rain down in a Godly fucking firestorm upon you! You're gonna have to call the fucking United Nations and get a fucking binding resolution to keep me from fucking destroying you. I'm talking about a scorched earth, motherfucker! I will massacre you! I WILL FUCK YOU UP!
Psycho: The name's Francis Sawyer, but everybody calls me Psycho. Any of you guys call me Francis, and I'll kill you.
Leon: ooooooooooooh.
Psycho: You just made the list, buddy ....... and I don't like nobody touching my stuff. So just keep your meat-hooks off. If I catch any of you guys in my stuff ..... I'll kill you. Also, I don't like nobody touching me. Now, any of you homos touch me, and I'll kill you.
Sergeant Hulka: Lighten up, Francis.
Great scene.
*We CAN bomb the World to pieces, but we CAN'T bomb it into PEACE*...Michael Franti
*MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
.....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti
*The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)
Comments
The whole opening scene is brilliant ... "Maybe next time don't wear a bra" ... "The arsonist was denied a bank loan" ... "You name's Lanolin? Lanolin? Like ... sheeps wool?" ... "AUDREY!!! THIS IS BUSH LEAGUE!!!"
"I don't believe in damn curses. Wake up the damn Bambino and have me face him. Maybe I'll drill him in the ass." --- Pedro Martinez
"I don't believe in damn curses. Wake up the damn Bambino and have me face him. Maybe I'll drill him in the ass." --- Pedro Martinez
You didn't recognize the sexy?
Dr. Gonzo: Plans?
Raoul Duke: The child in the bedroom.
Dr. Gonzo: Oh, Lucy. I met her on the plane. Yeah, she's a religious freak. I gave her a cap before I realized... Jesus, she's never even had a drink before.
Raoul Duke: Well... It'll probably work out. We can keep her loaded and peddle her ass at the drug convention. Yeah. She's perfect for this gig. These cops will go fifty bucks a head to beat her into submission and then gang fuck her. We can set her up in one of these back street motels, hang pictures of Jesus all over the room, then turn these fucking pigs loose on her. Hell, she's strong, man. She'll hold her own.
Dr. Gonzo: Jesus Christ. I knew you were sick but I never expected to hear you actually say that kind of stuff, you filthy bastard.
Raoul Duke: Straight economics man. This girl is a God-send. Shit, she can make us a grand a day.
Dr. Gonzo: That's ugly, man. Stop talking like that.
Raoul Duke: I figure she can do about four at a time. If we keep her full of acid that's more like two grand a day. Maybe three.
Dr. Gonzo: Hold on, man. What if I just jump you and beat the dog shit out of you? Would that make you feel better? You filthy bastard.
Raoul Duke: Alright listen to me. In a few hours, she'll probably be sane enough to work herself into some kind of towering Jesus-based rage at the hazy recollection of being seduced by some kind of cruel Samoan who fed her liquor and LSD, dragged her to a Vegas hotel room and then savagely penetrated every orifice in her little body with his throbbing, uncircumcised member.
Dr. Gonzo: That's so ugly, man!
Raoul Duke: Fuck. Truth hurts.
Dr. Gonzo: That's, argh! Argh! That's argh! Argh! That's argh!
Raoul Duke: Argh!
Dr. Gonzo: I wanted to help her, man.
Raoul Duke: Well, you'll go straight to the gas chamber for this one. And even if you manage to beat that, they'll still send you back to Nevada for rape and consensual sodomy. She's got to go.
Dr. Gonzo: Shit. It doesn't pay to try to help someone these days.
9/24/96 MD. 9/28/96 Randalls. 8/28-29/98 Camden. 9/8/98 NJ. 9/18/98 MD. 9/1-2/00 Camden. 9/4/00 MD. 4/28/03 Philly. 7/5-6/03 Camden. 9/30/05 AC.
10/3/05 Philly. 5/27-28/06 Camden. 6/23/06 Pitt. 6/19-20/08 Camden. 6/24/08 MSG. 8/7/08 EV Newark, NJ. 6/11-12/09 EV Philly, PA. 10/27-28-30-31/09 Philly, PA., 5/15/10 Hartford,5/17/10 Boston, 5/18/10 Newark, 5/20-21/10 MSG
Nah man, I'm pretty fucking far from okay.
Donnie: Why are you wearing that stupid bunny suit?
Frank: Why are you wearing that stupid man suit?
-Seth Rogan in "Superbad"
Fletch: No, I'm here with the Underhills.
Waiter: The Underhills? They are left, Señor.
Fletch: Oh they'll be back. He went out for his urinalysis.
Waiter: Would you like to order something, sir? I will put it on the Underhills' bill.
Fletch: Oh, yes. Very well. I'll have a Bloody Mary, a steak sandwich and a...steak sandwich.
Fletch: No...we don't have to, I mean, maybe I just haven't been doing enough calisthenics...you know, my kidneys feel a lot better now, maybe if I just bent over like this every morning......
[Dolan inserts his finger into Fletch's anus with an audible "pop" sound]
Fletch: [singing] Moon River......[talking] Whew...ever serve time, Doc?
Dr. Joseph Dolan: Breathe easy.
Fletch: Yeah...breathe easy... Ahh!! Using the whole fist, Doc?!
...
[After the proctological exam]
Dr. Joseph Dolan: Well, I can't seem to find anything wrong with you, Mr. Babar.
Fletch: Well, I'm sure it's not for a lack of looking.
well mr. helper, you remember that thing called the korean conflict where we failed to achieve victory. how come we didn't push those rice eaters over the great wall of china and nuke them into the fuckin stone age? Say it! Say it!
Albany 2006 Camden 2006 E. Rutherford 2, 2006 Inglewood 2006,
Chicago 2007
Camden 2008 MSG 2008 MSG 2008 Hartford 2008.
Seattle 2009 Seattle 2009 Philadelphia 2009,Philadelphia 2009 Philadelphia 2009
Hartford 2010 MSG 2010 MSG 2010
Toronto 2011,Toronto 2011
Wrigley Field 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Philadelphia 2, 2013
Philadelphia 1, 2016 Philadelphia 2 2016 New York 2016 New York 2016 Fenway 1, 2016
Fenway 2, 2018
MSG 2022
St. Paul, 1, St. Paul 2 2023
MSG 2024, MSG 2024
Philadelphia 2024
"I play good, hard-nosed basketball.
Things happen in the game. Nothing you
can do. I don't go and say,
"I'm gonna beat this guy up."
"I don't believe in damn curses. Wake up the damn Bambino and have me face him. Maybe I'll drill him in the ass." --- Pedro Martinez
under my head
where's your other hand?
between two pillows...
and fuck me if you only hear what you wanna hear
fuck me...if I care...but im not leavin here
BOS-9/28/04,9/29/04,6/28/08,6/30/08, 9/5/16, 9/7/16, 9/2/18
MTL-9/15/05, OTT-9/16/05
PHL-5/27/06,5/28/06,10/30/09,10/31/09
CHI-8/2/07,8/5/07,8/23/09,8/24/09
HTFD-6/27/08
ATX-10/4/09, 10/12/14
KC-5/3/2010,STL-5/4/2010
Bridge School-10/23/2010,10/24/2010
PJ20-9/3/2011,9/4/2011
OKC-11/16/13
SEA-12/6/13
TUL-10/8/14
BOS-9/28/04,9/29/04,6/28/08,6/30/08, 9/5/16, 9/7/16, 9/2/18
MTL-9/15/05, OTT-9/16/05
PHL-5/27/06,5/28/06,10/30/09,10/31/09
CHI-8/2/07,8/5/07,8/23/09,8/24/09
HTFD-6/27/08
ATX-10/4/09, 10/12/14
KC-5/3/2010,STL-5/4/2010
Bridge School-10/23/2010,10/24/2010
PJ20-9/3/2011,9/4/2011
OKC-11/16/13
SEA-12/6/13
TUL-10/8/14
Leon: ooooooooooooh.
Psycho: You just made the list, buddy ....... and I don't like nobody touching my stuff. So just keep your meat-hooks off. If I catch any of you guys in my stuff ..... I'll kill you. Also, I don't like nobody touching me. Now, any of you homos touch me, and I'll kill you.
Sergeant Hulka: Lighten up, Francis.
"I don't believe in damn curses. Wake up the damn Bambino and have me face him. Maybe I'll drill him in the ass." --- Pedro Martinez
No,
Well, you will.
Do you think this is a little bit cathartic for you?
Uh, very cathartic, Mark.
Do you know what cathartic means?
No.
No one has ever, ever paid admission to see an excuse.
Tom Hagen: I'm German-Irish.
Jack Woltz: Well, let me tell you something, my kraut-mick friend, I'm gonna make so much trouble for you, you won t know what hit you
Of my innocence... got back my inner sense...
First, take a big step back... and literally, FUCK YOUR OWN FACE! I don't know what kind of pan-pacific bullshit power play you're trying to pull here, but Asia Jack is my territory. So whatever you're thinking, you'd better think again! Otherwise I'm gonna have to head down there and I will rain down in a Godly fucking firestorm upon you! You're gonna have to call the fucking United Nations and get a fucking binding resolution to keep me from fucking destroying you. I'm talking about a scorched earth, motherfucker! I will massacre you! I WILL FUCK YOU UP!
BOS-9/28/04,9/29/04,6/28/08,6/30/08, 9/5/16, 9/7/16, 9/2/18
MTL-9/15/05, OTT-9/16/05
PHL-5/27/06,5/28/06,10/30/09,10/31/09
CHI-8/2/07,8/5/07,8/23/09,8/24/09
HTFD-6/27/08
ATX-10/4/09, 10/12/14
KC-5/3/2010,STL-5/4/2010
Bridge School-10/23/2010,10/24/2010
PJ20-9/3/2011,9/4/2011
OKC-11/16/13
SEA-12/6/13
TUL-10/8/14
Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
AWESOME- A Fish Call Wanda is classic.
"Because I bumped into him, and all I had on me was this samurai sword. And you're not NOT gonna get randy jackson's autrograph, right?"
"I would have done the exact same thing......Now, do you want to see something really cool?"
"Of course"
"turn off the lights..........................industrial strength night vision goggles"
"Holy Santa Claus sh!t. Can you imagine if wwe had these when we were 12?"
"Even better, we got 'em when we're 40."
Alpine Valley - Sept 3-4, 2011 Philly - Sept 2, 2012 Brooklyn - Oct 18-19, 2013 Philly - Oct 21-22, 2013 LA - Nov 23-24, 2013 New York -Sept 26, 2015 Fort Lauderdale - Apr 8, 2016 Miami - Apr 9, 2016 Philly - Apr 28-29, 2016 MSG - May 1-2, 2016 Fenway - Aug 5-7, 2016
Brooklyn - Apr 7, 2017 Fenway - Sept 3-4, 2018
Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
Great scene.
*MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
.....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti
*The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)
"I didn't know they gave out rings during the holocaust."
...........................................................................................
"WE'RE STRAKING!!!!!!!!
9/29/04 Boston, 6/28/08 Mansfield, 8/23/09 Chicago, 5/15/10 Hartford
5/17/10 Boston, 10/15/13 Worcester, 10/16/13 Worcester, 10/25/13 Hartford
8/5/16 Fenway, 8/7/16 Fenway
EV Solo: 6/16/11 Boston, 6/18/11 Hartford,