Forced Religion

riotgrl · March 2013

I had the exact same experience growing up. If you have an otherwise good relationship with your parents, I would suck it up and go until you're 18. Once I turned 18 I went, on occasion, to keep the peace at home but they found it hard to argue with my logic about being a legal adult. Most of my friends left home to go to college while I was still living at home so if I had been away they would never know what I was doing and that argument helped me convince them they no longer had control over my choices. I gave them 20 years for religion to work but it never did for me. My entire life I questioned everything I was taught about Christianity but no one could ever satisfy my questions and the conversations always ended with being told I needed to have faith. My parents are still trying to convince me 20 years later but it has evolved into, if not mutual respect for our individual beliefs, at least a respect to agree to disagree. I have wonderful parents who tried their best that's probably what they are trying to do for you. Good luck!

81 · March 2013

chadwick wrote:

get a job & make your own money to pay your own phone bill & buy your own television & pay the cable guy his monthly charge or give up cable altogether.

not bad advice.....

although, and i don't know about his family or plans, but it could impact other things like college funding.

suck tho...i feel for you kid. i guess it could be a life lesson...that sometimes we just gotta do shit even if we don't wanna do shit. my advice...find a cute girl and an empty room.

Jason P · March 2013

I had the same issue growing up with having to go to church every week. And mowing the lawn. And cleaning my room. Don't worry, as long as you are ready to lead your own life, change is not far away.

The bad news is that monthly bills will replace the chores.

:fp:

Hugh Freaking Dillon · March 2013

pandora wrote:

I was never forced, just the opposite, not given the privilege to learn about religion.
So I did it on my own eventually.
I guess you will undo it on your own when you are no longer under the care of your parents.

Hopefully if they ask you nicely on occasion to attend with them
you will find it in your heart to do so.
Being an aging parent memories are very meaningful as is making new memories
and living the family traditions.

Making people who love you and whom you love happy is the best part of living.
Try not to have a cold heart once it's free ... give in a little just to please.

asking someone to do something that they don't believe in is not love. it's control.

know1 · March 2013

Can you find a different church to attend that is more to your liking?

I say that because you say you are unsure about believing, but sure you don't want to attend that church.

Perhaps that would be a good compromise.

know1 · March 2013

Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:

asking someone to do something that they don't believe in is not love. it's control.

They're his parents. They're supposed to make him do stuff they believe in.

Hugh Freaking Dillon · March 2013

know1 wrote:

Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:

asking someone to do something that they don't believe in is not love. it's control.

They're his parents. They're supposed to make him do stuff they believe in.

YIKES.

Thirty Bills Unpaid · March 2013

Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:

know1 wrote:

Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:

asking someone to do something that they don't believe in is not love. it's control.

They're his parents. They're supposed to make him do stuff they believe in.

YIKES.

No shit.

Know... you might wish to revisit your post and think about that for a few minutes (or hours).

Are you suggesting that lineage should dictate what type of person you must become? Never a chance to become your own person? Even if the stuff one's parents want their child to believe is hurtful to others or- for lack of a better term at the moment- dumb?

pandora · March 2013

know1 wrote:

They're his parents. They're supposed to make him do stuff they believe in.

Exactly this is what parents do instill values, educate, teach what they themselves believe in
and then children take what speaks to their hearts and go as adults.

I was not taught religion because my parents weren't.
I was an atheist till I was 40 so I did not give my children the knowledge of God.
It is upon them now to seek out what they believe and they are.
But still I did not give the joy I now have in my heart to them at a much earlier age.
I did not know God to give to them. It is a great gift to give.

Jason P · March 2013

lukin2006 wrote:

...can't stand church, what a waste of Sunday morning.

Amen! You could be using that time to eat space age out of this world Moon Waffles!

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS1wHjCORvHSo6gQUXETWPDrMf6G5phO4qpEg13bGnMKlba4VevHw

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS1wHjCORvHSo6gQUXETWPDrMf6G5phO4qpEg13bGnMKlba4VevHw

1 package caramel
waffle batter
liquid smoke
1/2-1 cup butter

Directions:

1 - Pour first 3 ingredients on waffle iron.
2 - Close iron.
3 - You may enjoy the"waffle runoff" that is squeezed out when you close the iron.
4 - When waffle is done, peel it off the waffle iron.
5 - Wrap waffle around full stick of butter.
6 - Insert toothpick to close waffle around butter and enjoy.

hedonist · March 2013

Jason P wrote:

hedonist wrote:

Also (and I'm sorry if this is out of line) but did anyone else think of that Simps episode where Homer skipped church on a snowy Sunday and made waffles wrapped around a stick of butter?

Thirty Bills Unpaid · March 2013

pandora wrote:

know1 wrote:

They're his parents. They're supposed to make him do stuff they believe in.

Exactly this is what parents do instill values, educate, teach what they themselves believe in
and then children take what speaks to their hearts and go as adults.

I was not taught religion because my parents weren't.
I was an atheist till I was 40 so I did not give my children the knowledge of God.
It is upon them now to seek out what they believe and they are.
But still I did not give the joy I now have in my heart to them at a much earlier age.
I did not know God to give to them. It is a great gift to give.

So... the children born of Westboro Church goers must adopt their parents' values and perpetuate the extreme ideologies because these are the wishes of the parents? This is a gift?

Bilnd obediance and indoctrination? Ridiculous.

If the OP doesn't wish to buy in to the story of religion... then he has the right to move forward into a lifestyle he is comfortable in without condemnation. He's 17 years old and from the sounds of things... religion has been hammered at him. From what I read, he's been very respectful and more than accomodated to this point in time. At what point is he free to make his own decisions?

redrock · March 2013

Thirty Bills Unpaid wrote:

pandora wrote:

know1 wrote:

They're his parents. They're supposed to make him do stuff they believe in.

Exactly this is what parents do instill values, educate, teach what they themselves believe in
and then children take what speaks to their hearts and go as adults.

I was not taught religion because my parents weren't.
I was an atheist till I was 40 so I did not give my children the knowledge of God.
It is upon them now to seek out what they believe and they are.
But still I did not give the joy I now have in my heart to them at a much earlier age.
I did not know God to give to them. It is a great gift to give.

So... the children born of Westboro Church goers must adopt their parents' values and perpetuate the extreme ideologies because these are the wishes of the parents? This is a gift?

Bilnd obediance and indoctrination? Ridiculous.

If the OP doesn't wish to buy in to the story of religion... then he has the right to move forward into a lifestyle he is comfortable in without condemnation. He's 17 years old and from the sounds of things... religion has been hammered at him. From what I read, he's been very respectful and more than accomodated to this point in time. At what point is he free to make his own decisions?

Exactly. The OP is more than at an age where one needs to question and seek for one's self (which, it would seem he is doing). Having controlling parents will mean he will have to 'comply' whilst he is living in their house. Whilst the role of the parent is to impart knowledge, values, etc., it is not to indoctrinate and stifle the child's mind, not giving an opportunity for this child to develop as his/her own being. Once this young man is independent (or semi if off to university, etc.), he will have the freedom he needs to fully develop as his own person. What works for the parents, may not work for the child. What the parents find joy and truth in, the child might find confinement and hypocrisy.

Whilst we are not believers in a religion, in her early teens, my daughter was interested in finding out about the various religions and what they were all about. Nothing hit a chord with her but she was inquisitive. Should she have 'found' herself in a belief, we would have fully supported her in that. I really can't understand how young and older adults can go through a large part of their lives without even looking at what is around... It's really more 'general knowledge' and curiosity, if nothing else.

Hedonist and Jason...

pandora · March 2013

God is the gift.

Do some here think it is blind indoctrination to teach your children not to do drugs?
To do well in school, to respect people of all races?
I'm assuming that those so against teaching religion think teaching your children
all these other things are great and will help make a young responsible adult.

Just not God because why again .... would that have anything to do with not believing ?

If so great for you and your children, I didn't teach mine either, but not for others
who have God and religion to share.

Children remain under the guidance of their parents till they can provide for themselves.
If that means out of the home off to college I'm sure that child will decide whether
or not to attend in absence from their parents.

Like I said before hopefully a free heart will keep its warmth and
sensitivity towards the parents who gave them so much and attend church
occasionally out of loving respect for them, their family.

What kind of child are you?

Jason P · March 2013

hedonist wrote:

hedonist wrote:

Also (and I'm sorry if this is out of line) but did anyone else think of that Simps episode where Homer skipped church on a snowy Sunday and made waffles wrapped around a stick of butter?

Ha, I didn’t even see that. We must be linked together on some level of unconsciousness. :geek:

Or maybe we just both watched a ton of The Simpsons back in the day.

Hugh Freaking Dillon · March 2013

pandora wrote:

God is the gift.

Do some here think it is blind indoctrination to teach your children not to do drugs?
To do well in school, to respect people of all races?
I'm assuming that those so against teaching religion think teaching your children
all these other things are great and will help make a young responsible adult.

Just not God because why again .... would that have anything to do with not believing ?

If so great for you and your children, I didn't teach mine either, but not for others
who have God and religion to share.

Children remain under the guidance of their parents till they can provide for themselves.
If that means out of the home off to college I'm sure that child will decide whether
or not to attend in absence from their parents.

Like I said before hopefully a free heart will keep its warmth and
sensitivity towards the parents who gave them so much and attend church
occasionally out of loving respect for them, their family.

What kind of child are you?

my parents would never, and will never, EVER ask me as an adult to attend anything that goes against my beliefs. the kind of parent that would ask that of their child (as an adult) is, to be blunt, selfish and an asshole.

Hugh Freaking Dillon · March 2013

pandora wrote:

God is the gift.

Do some here think it is blind indoctrination to teach your children not to do drugs?
To do well in school, to respect people of all races?
I'm assuming that those so against teaching religion think teaching your children
all these other things are great and will help make a young responsible adult.

just to be clear, the things you describe here belong to the term socialization, not indoctrination. you'd be wise to learn the difference.

josevolution · March 2013

know1 wrote:

Hugh Freaking Dillon wrote:

asking someone to do something that they don't believe in is not love. it's control.

They're his parents. They're supposed to make him do stuff they believe in.

No they are supposed to listen to hi's choice and state their case but not make him go to church ....And you said it stuff they believe in not what he feels , believe me i have two kids a 19yrold son 16yr old daughter ...

BinauralJam · March 2013

pearljam133 wrote:

I'm 17 yrs old. Every single Sunday I'm forced to go to church. Every single Sunday since I was born. I've been straight forward with my parents and told them that I want no part of it. I don't know whether or not I believe, but all I know is that I do not want to attend church regularly. They scold me and tell me I'm fucked up. They can't accept it. Its just getting old at this point. Endless arguing all the time has become redundant. I have no problem with religion or people who choose to lead a religious-based life. I just don't see that as something I want for myself. So has anyone ever had this experience before? Any suggestions on how to get my parents to respect my point of view?

You're going to have to endure it until you're free, and then RUN, RUN FAR AWAY! Good Luck.

Pjzepp67 · March 2013

pandora wrote:

God is the gift.

Do some here think it is blind indoctrination to teach your children not to do drugs?
To do well in school, to respect people of all races?
I'm assuming that those so against teaching religion think teaching your children
all these other things are great and will help make a young responsible adult.

Just not God because why again .... would that have anything to do with not believing ?

If so great for you and your children, I didn't teach mine either, but not for others
who have God and religion to share.

Children remain under the guidance of their parents till they can provide for themselves.
If that means out of the home off to college I'm sure that child will decide whether
or not to attend in absence from their parents.

Like I said before hopefully a free heart will keep its warmth and
sensitivity towards the parents who gave them so much and attend church
occasionally out of loving respect for them, their family.

What kind of child are you?

Fuck it...this is my last ever post on the subject of religion on this most enjoyable and thought provoking forums around, as it now makes me far too angry to be objective
Blind indoctrination only survives in one area as far as I can see, in all forms of religion, bar none.
There is no God.
There are no Gods.
I hope the OP finds an escape without losing any love or respect from his parents.
I hope Hugh Freakin Dillons nephew found some answers at his Bible class.

Please enjoy the never ending debate... :fp:

Forced Religion

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