Pearl Jam turned Better Man into a cream puff song

rearviewross · February 2013

Its like the Police and Every Breath You Take. Its a creepy song about stalking. Sting couldn't understand why people were playing it at weddings.

PJ_Soul · February 2013

rearviewross wrote:

Its like the Police and Every Breath You Take. Its a creepy song about stalking. Sting couldn't understand why people were playing it at weddings.

That is a pretty weird song to play at a wedding! But surely musicians understand that not everyone 1) even listens to what the lyrics actually are carefully, or 2) takes lyrics in the same way that they were intended. Eddie certainly understands that people place different meanings on his lyrics than what he personally meant by them (although I don't think that counts for Better Man - the lyrics are too explicit in their meaning to really be interpreted a different way).

OGT92 · February 2013

Funny...the only reason I want to hear Betterman at a show is the intro/sing-a-long. I get the chills most times. Oh and also the Save it for later tag.

Otherwise I could care less if they ever played it again. I did like what Ed did with it for his solo show.

bootlegger10 · February 2013

I thought Ed said the song was about George Bush during the VH1 Storytellers? When I heard that I knew the setlist and stories would suck (outside of Alive).

fortyshades · February 2013

oceaninmyeyes wrote:

IamTom wrote:

I'm interested that a man who is,seemingly,saying he is anti domestic violence and therefore by extension in a place of respecting feminism and women's rights would use the sexually derogatory term 'pussification' in the title of the thread.

For me this is utterly incongruent with the point you seem to be trying to make.

I have to say that I felt it was a little bizarre as well.

Yep, I agree. Out of fear of starting another thread on derogatory words or wording - considering a thread awhile back - I tried to diplomatically emphasize and raise this in my post, but I agree. The title seems what "off".

fortyshades · February 2013

bootlegger10 wrote:

I thought Ed said the song was about George Bush during the VH1 Storytellers? When I heard that I knew the setlist and stories would suck (outside of Alive).

Well, to be honest, I can see this methaphore. (Reminds me of APC and the song "Pet".) Sometimes we "choose" our abusive relationships and like I stated, I think it is about the complexity of domestic violence instead of the violence itself. (domestic violence/ domestic politics - see a connection there.)

Historically, the song was written way before George W. Bush snorted his first line of cocaine. So, I would take this comparison with a grain of salt; I think it is more a dedication to Good Ol' Bush and his domestic policies

.

I liked the stories at Storytellers btw. I thought they were well thought-out and touching.

Ty · February 2013

Big Bank Hank wrote:

Ty wrote:

All red and angry about people enjoying a song, doing what they did for "Alive"... build a bridge, Dude! A very odd and angry post. Take a chill pill. And there ain't too much positive about the other songs you listed... :fp:

lets see one song is a bout a kid who didn't get to know his father, however that was something he overcame, but that was his own inner struggle, I use to see Better Man for what it was speaking out against domestic violence, and I always thought it was an advocacy for that, yeah lets end domestic violence, and it was one of my favorite Pearl Jam songs, now it's current form, and the way people sing the lyrics hollow, with no sense of what the song is really about, just sad, go ahead and sing it if you want and celebrate women getting the crap out of them, because is what the song is about, I guess if you never grew up around it, then of course you wouldn't get it

Suggesting I celebrate women getting the crap belt out of them? Let's lock this one up... Big Bank Hank, go fuck yourself!

ckravitz · February 2013

In homage to our OP....

IBTL !!!!

amethgr8 · February 2013

in agreement with the derogatory term. although I think the word came from pussywillow which is soft and I think the OP is implying the growth of the song with the audience has softened the hard facts of domestic violence. just a gues, wikipedia says origins unknown but mostly vugar and derogertory.

its about something we need to be who we are because we are so used to and at the same time you find yourself not being able to stand who are because of what you have to go thru everyday; not knowing if you're strong enough to make a change and ultimately scared to death either way.

Choccoloccotide · February 2013

I have never particularly liked the song that much, even though hearing the intro live is cool.

JB128716 · February 2013

And how dare anyone play The Police's Every Breath You Take at their weddings.

That song is about a stalker!!!

Wake-up People. Lol

JB128716 · February 2013

JB128716 wrote:

And how dare anyone play The Police's Every Breath You Take at their weddings.

That song is about a stalker!!!

Wake-up People. Lol

Oops other people beat me to it. I was too lazy to read all the pages.

ponner1us · February 2013

fortyshades wrote:

Therefore singing along to this song is not, from my point of view at least, demeaning the meaning of the song, but actually an attempt to *relate* and *identify*. Hearing 10 000 people singing back to you, your own personal experiences, must be a very humbling experience. Its singing along to reach out and to say "I know, I understand" - that is at least how I always interpreted it. It is therefore not singing along and changing the meaning of the song as Alive did - for the original meaning I had read in an interview was about suicide - but singing along to reach out to all those who are silenced. That in itself is a form of empowerment.

Well said!

I sang along to this song @ MSG2 2010, it was amazing.

While the lyrics might be about domestic violence, fan's interpretations of it might differ. A victim of DV might sing along to this song because she (usually a female, I'm not being sexist here) identifies with the woman in the song and celebrates their shared attempt to mend a broken situation. Or a previous abuser might sing along because he recognized his wrong-doing and his partner stood by him while he worked through his own issues, thus ending the abuse. Or a younger guy might sing along because he identifies his father with the abuser, and realizes that his own family members were all victims buy they all overcame, etc...

So sing along or don't, but don't assume you speak on behalf of anyone other than yourself.

PJ-Cubs · February 2013

OGT92 wrote:

Funny...the only reason I want to hear Betterman at a show is the intro/sing-a-long. I get the chills most times. Oh and also the Save it for later tag.

Otherwise I could care less if they ever played it again. I did like what Ed did with it for his solo show.

Never been a fan of the EV solo "lullaby" version of Betterman.

Big Bank Hank · February 2013

the word pussification may have been the wrong term, but Iived and that is the term we used to describe a song that has become soft, but I will change the title to something more politically correct, since the band has become a political band anyway

Big Bank Hank · February 2013

since there are so many in here with the attention span of........and want to dissect every single word, fine whatever, the song has become soft and weak, but that is fine whatever, sing along enjoy yourselves, and kid yourself into believing whatever you want, and the fact that Eddie would take a song that meant something and actually change it to what he has, I am not surprised, back in the day they were complaining about Ticketmaster, but now they play $20,000 a plate fundraisers for Obama, talk about weak, so at least I stand for what I believe and can see the whole picture and the totality of what is said, and not take 7 or 8 words out of 10,000, but with some of the attention spans nowadays, I can't expect many to actually engage in deep thought, but the few of you in this thread who actually are critical thinkers and look at the whole picture I applaud you, because that is becoming rare nowadays, and I could care less about the negative comments, because if you only have one sentence to say about domestic violence, you obviously don't have anything that contributes to the conversation, or that will change the world, in fact it comes across as hollow, but if you are happy in a hollow existence than you should do what makes you happy, I believe the whole point in life is to be the best person you can possibly be, and for me that means caring about the injustices in the world and trying to make the world a better place.

moyboy · February 2013

Big Bank Hank wrote:

since there are so many in here with the attention span of........and want to dissect every single word, fine whatever, the song has become soft and weak, but that is fine whatever, sing along enjoy yourselves, and kid yourself into believing whatever you want, and the fact that Eddie would take a song that meant something and actually change it to what he has, I am not surprised, back in the day they were complaining about Ticketmaster, but now they play $20,000 a plate fundraisers for Obama, talk about weak, so at least I stand for what I believe and can see the whole picture and the totality of what is said, and not take 7 or 8 words out of 10,000, but with some of the attention spans nowadays, I can't expect many to actually engage in deep thought, but the few of you in this thread who actually are critical thinkers and look at the whole picture I applaud you, because that is becoming rare nowadays, and I could care less about the negative comments, because if you only have one sentence to say about domestic violence, you obviously don't have anything that contributes to the conversation, or that will change the world, in fact it comes across as hollow, but if you are happy in a hollow existence than you should do what makes you happy, I believe the whole point in life is to be the best person you can possibly be, and for me that means caring about the injustices in the world and trying to make the world a better place.

wow, you seem fun.

ranting on the Internet about a song losing its meaning to you does not equal curing the world of injustices.

if only it were that easy.

Big Bank Hank · February 2013

Pearl Jam - Better Man (Live in Atlanta, 1994) R.I.P.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8QdRJwSTRn8

foriginalsin · February 2013

Big Bank Hank wrote:

since there are so many in here with the attention span of........and want to dissect every single word, fine whatever, the song has become soft and weak, but that is fine whatever, sing along enjoy yourselves, and kid yourself into believing whatever you want, and the fact that Eddie would take a song that meant something and actually change it to what he has, I am not surprised, back in the day they were complaining about Ticketmaster, but now they play $20,000 a plate fundraisers for Obama, talk about weak, so at least I stand for what I believe and can see the whole picture and the totality of what is said, and not take 7 or 8 words out of 10,000, but with some of the attention spans nowadays, I can't expect many to actually engage in deep thought, but the few of you in this thread who actually are critical thinkers and look at the whole picture I applaud you, because that is becoming rare nowadays, and I could care less about the negative comments, because if you only have one sentence to say about domestic violence, you obviously don't have anything that contributes to the conversation, or that will change the world, in fact it comes across as hollow, but if you are happy in a hollow existence than you should do what makes you happy, I believe the whole point in life is to be the best person you can possibly be, and for me that means caring about the injustices in the world and trying to make the world a better place.

Hello run on sentence. Smoke some weed, its just a song.

Mango · February 2013

Pearl Jam turned Better Man into a cream puff song

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