my curiosity about these things is never satisfied... this is something I just can't figure our how many people I ask and how many times it comes up on this board. So as specifically as possible, please answer these 2 questions for me:
1) How did you MEET your significant other (or your last one)? Work? School? Bar? Match.com? Did one of you drop your papers on the street and look up and see the other one and fall in love at first sight?
2) How did you then TRANSITION from just knowing this person or liking them to actually being in a romantic relationship? Did you ask them out on a date and then it was just implied? Did you suddenly like kiss or something? Did you just like, tell them you liked them?
thanks for the help with my research!!!
the last one was a really long time ago and that was at work
we were friends, significant others, back to friends and now she's married
Reading 2004
Albany 2006 Camden 2006 E. Rutherford 2, 2006 Inglewood 2006,
Chicago 2007
Camden 2008 MSG 2008 MSG 2008 Hartford 2008.
Seattle 2009 Seattle 2009 Philadelphia 2009,Philadelphia 2009 Philadelphia 2009
Hartford 2010 MSG 2010 MSG 2010
Toronto 2011,Toronto 2011
Wrigley Field 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Philadelphia 2, 2013
Philadelphia 1, 2016 Philadelphia 2 2016 New York 2016 New York 2016 Fenway 1, 2016 Fenway 2, 2018 MSG 2022 St. Paul, 1, St. Paul 2 2023 MSG 2024, MSG 2024 Philadelphia 2024
"I play good, hard-nosed basketball.
Things happen in the game. Nothing you
can do. I don't go and say,
"I'm gonna beat this guy up."
L You kind of get an idea that the other person has feelings too.
Is there a way to know this? Every time I've had this feeling, I've been wrong. I mean everything SEEMS to line up with what people say, but I still get it wrong. It's like every math test I've ever taken, I *know* the stuff, but I still get the wrong answer.
ok I'm going to give an example here. A couple years ago when I was in grad school I was taking a class through a different program. there was this cute guy in the class...I assumed he was out of my league, so I would just kinda look at him and smile and stuff, never bothered trying anything. One day I was sitting there before class and I looked up from what I was doing and out of nowhere, he walks all the way around the room, sticks his hand out, and just introduces himself, for no reason. I was so shocked, I could barely remember my name. I figured no one would do this if they weren't like interested, you know. So I took every excuse to talk to him and even once emailed him for some stupid reason! But nothing happened...he never asked me out. But still it was just so weird, it really seemed like he liked me. My friend who knew him said he was just a really friendly guy.
a look (not a creepy stare), a laugh, a smile, a touch (even just a light rush on thier shoulder or hand when you talk)....your body language. You dont' have to speak your intensions.
Wide, easy smiles accompanied with a relaxed face. She blushes frequently and her skin tone become redder.
She maintains eye contact throughout and her pupils are dilated (they become larger). She would often blink more frequently than usual and her eye lashes flutter. You might even notice a sparkle in her eye.
These are also signs that she's about to vomit, fyi.
If the girl you are with is interested in you, she will exhibit certain signs of attraction and arousal. Each little mannerism, for example the sparkle in her eyes, her tone of voice, her body language should be taken into consideration when trying to decide if the lady you are with is genuinely interested in you.
Signs Of Arousal
Wide, easy smiles accompanied with a relaxed face. She blushes frequently and her skin tone become redder.
She maintains eye contact throughout and her pupils are dilated (they become larger). She would often blink more frequently than usual and her eye lashes flutter. You might even notice a sparkle in her eye. The eyes are windows to the soul and are one of the most accurate ways of telling if she is attracted to you.
Subconscious biting of the lips or showing of the tongue, wetting her lips or even chewing her fingernails.
While talking, she is slowly stroking her cocktail glass (or any cylindrical object) up and down with her thumb and index finger. (reveals what she is thinking of, if you get my meaning) She might also be fiddling with her jewelry.
She starts sitting up and her arms aren't limp. If her crossed leg is pointing in your general direction and rocking back and forth.
She adjusts the tone and pitch of her voice to match yours. In fact, any sigh that she is mimicking you can be taken as a sign of interest. For example, laughing in unison or crossing her legs if you've crossed yours.
She winks at you in the middle of a conversation or even from a distance. This means she really is interested in you. Even exposing the palms of her hand facing you show that she might be interested in you as it has been proven to be a subconscious sign telling you that she has nothing to hide.
She twirls her hair around her fingers or perhaps strokes her hair lightly with her hand while maintaining eye contact.
Should you have any questions, you can use the Romance Forums to post your queries and give advice. If you found the information here helpful, could you return the favor by referring us to a friend? It's the least you can do.
These are also signs that she's about to vomit, fyi.
You win some, you lose some
My whole life
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
1.I was reluctantly set-up. A mutual friend conned me into going to the hardware store to get paint. She brought her dog with us. I clued in when we got there. She said " put some lip gloss on!". I almost ran away. "oh shit, she's setting me up!" I thought.
We go in, her dog in tow, and he makes a b-line to this guy covered in tatoos, and covers him with licks and love.
I'm thinking hmmmm! I am not sure and I go hide behind the paintchips.My palms start sweating, my heart starts beating and then he comes over and asks me" what are you looking for? What color?" with a big smile.
I stammer and try and get out something that kind of resembles english and paint color. " Do you have any suede paint, you know the kind that is a little texturized?"
2.He left with us and comes back for dinner. First he fixed her Bar-B Que and cooked us steaks. We had about 2 hours to talk,all 3 of us, then he walked me home. Then a little magic happened.
3. He wrote his number on a notepad piece of paper with his full name. I laughed at it. His last name is sooooo common. I added " Are you serious, that's your last name?" "Yeah, it is!"
4.Transition was pretty immediate from there: I stood two steps higher than him on my stairs outside my apartment, so we were face to face and I planted a kiss on his lips. Wow! Electric and very tender. 10 seconds, enough to feel the warmth of his breath and softness of his lips. No tongue.
5.Then I couldn't sleep for hours, I was floating. I felt like I was 15 again, being kissed for the very first time.
6.He called me the next day. I made him wait for "it" for 3 weeks.It was torture for me as well, but so worth it.
Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's Soul remains Unawakened.
Anatole France
1.I was reluctantly set-up. A mutual friend conned me into going to the hardware store to get paint. She brought her dog with us. I clued in when we got there. She said " put some lip gloss on!". I almost ran away. "oh shit, she's setting me up!" I thought.
We go in, her dog in tow, and he makes a b-line to this guy covered in tatoos, and covers him with licks and love.
I'm thinking hmmmm! I am not sure and I go hide behind the paintchips.My palms start sweating, my heart starts beating and then he comes over and asks me" what are you looking for? What color?" with a big smile.
I stammer and try and get out something that kind of resembles english and paint color. " Do you have any suede paint, you know the kind that is a little texturized?"
2.He left with us and comes back for dinner. First he fixed her Bar-B Que and cooked us steaks. We had about 2 hours to talk,all 3 of us, then he walked me home. Then a little magic happened.
3. He wrote his number on a notepad piece of paper with his full name. I laughed at it. His last name is sooooo common. I added " Are you serious, that's your last name?" "Yeah, it is!"
4.Transition was pretty immediate from there: I stood two steps higher than him on my stairs outside my apartment, so we were face to face and I planted a kiss on his lips. Wow! Electric and very tender. 10 seconds, enough to feel the warmth of his breath and softness of his lips. No tongue.
5.Then I couldn't sleep for hours, I was floating. I felt like I was 15 again, being kissed for the very first time.
6.He called me the next day. I made him wait for "it" for 3 weeks.It was torture for me as well, but so worth it.
this kind of thing doesn't usually happen in real life...I'm a bit skeptical if this is real...good for you if it is, but I get the feeling I'm being duped here...
I worked an barnes and noble in college and josh worked there part time because he was new to the state and took a dumb part time job to meet people.
One day I got the balls to go in to the store and ask him out to a bar with me and my friends. He accepted and came out. We had a good time and then I asked him to dinner 2 days later. We had a lot in common and we hit it off so we started dating and then a month later I moved in :eek: I move quickly
I am not a liar. Ask Jeanie if you are still suspicious! She knows me well.
This is just the kind of thing in life where you put yourself out there. I was single for 5 years before I met him. Dating losers and such here and there, but no real connection.
And for your information, we are still happily in love and living together.He's my best friend and my lover.
We also fucking hate Valentine's Day. Where's that thread this year?
Just thought I would share our story.
Cynicism kills romance!!!
Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's Soul remains Unawakened.
Anatole France
I am not a liar. Ask Jeanie if you are still suspicious! She know me well.
This is just the kind of thing in life where you put yourself out there. I was single for 5 years before I met him. Dating losers and such here and there, but no real connection.
And for your information, we are still happily in love and living together.He's my best friend and my lover.
We also fucking hate Valentine's Day. Where's that thread this year?
Just thought I would share our story.
Cynicism kills romance!!!
oh there's several anti v-day threads .
ok, i'm sorry I doubted you. how did your friend know such an awesome guy? (I've never known anyone who knows anyone) and why didn't she just take him for herself?
She's Jewish, and wanted a Jewish guy. Go figure. We are not actually friends anymore. She got quite jealous seeing us in love. We dog sat for her when she went to Peru for 3 weeks that summer(2004). She came back and turned into a bitch. I don't know why, but we decided that her place in our life was just to make us connect.
I have heard from others that have lost a friend( even a casual one) over this type of match making.
Some people have a hard time seein gothers in love, and connecting. I myself love to see couples sharing their love., whether new or old.
I still hate V-day though. Like the other manmade holidays.
Life is for living. Not planning.
Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's Soul remains Unawakened.
Anatole France
well thanks everyone. I don't know if I learned all that much. I thought maybe if I asked specific questions it would help me finally get to the bottom of it (you know, it's a like a contingent valuation survey). I am glad to see however that a lot of people did actually say that someone asked someone else out on a date kinda thing where the intentions were clear, because usually the answer I get is "I don't know we just got together."
I guess it's going to be back to match.com for me though eventually, because none of these things seem like that things that would happen in my life.
ugh, I really really want to do it without the crutch though. it's very depressing. you end up dating people because you're both just there, not because you really like them. I want someone to like me first (or hell even just think I'm cute) and then ask me out :(.
my curiosity about these things is never satisfied... this is something I just can't figure our how many people I ask and how many times it comes up on this board. So as specifically as possible, please answer these 2 questions for me:
1) How did you MEET your significant other (or your last one)? Work? School? Bar? Match.com? Did one of you drop your papers on the street and look up and see the other one and fall in love at first sight?
2) How did you then TRANSITION from just knowing this person or liking them to actually being in a romantic relationship? Did you ask them out on a date and then it was just implied? Did you suddenly like kiss or something? Did you just like, tell them you liked them?
thanks for the help with my research!!!
I had met my GF through a friend a few times, then I started running into her at concerts. At a Pogues show in Oct 06, I turned on my quirky charm, then asked her friend to give me her email address.
I made a point of asking her to dinner alone, so that my intentions were know. I feel its best to be direct, as opposed to dropping hints and then wondering!
We knew we liked each other based on the chemistry we had. No words were needed!
I had met my GF through a friend a few times, then I started running into her at concerts. At a Pogues show in Oct 06, I turned on my quirky charm, then asked her friend to give me her email address.
I made a point of asking her to dinner alone, so that my intentions were know. I feel its best to be direct, as opposed to dropping hints and then wondering!
We knew we liked each other based on the chemistry we had. No words were needed!
howcome I never meet anyone like this? My friends don't seem to know ANYONE and if they did I doubt they would be the types of people I'd run into at shows!
Greentea, where do you live? It helps I think to just get out and socialize with people. You're not saying you've never had someone interested in you, are you? I seriously doubt that! Why do you think you are unattractive? Everyone has a little something special about them that someone else finds amazing.
howcome I never meet anyone like this? My friends don't seem to know ANYONE and if they did I doubt they would be the types of people I'd run into at shows!
Do you have any gig buddies?
I know a bunch of people that I only see at gigs....they are a good source for introductions!
Greentea, where do you live? It helps I think to just get out and socialize with people. You're not saying you've never had someone interested in you, are you? I seriously doubt that! Why do you think you are unattractive? Everyone has a little something special about them that someone else finds amazing.
boston area...
I socialize as much as I can (even though I've been very nervous about it lately, I still make an effort). But I still don't have a ton of opportunities to socialize. I only know a few people in the area (and sorry but they're kinda boring). I plyed soccer in the fall which was really fun and there were cool people, but I didn't like, make any friends from it. We're supposed to get the team up for the spring so maybe I will meet more people, I dunno.
Um, well no one I didn't meet on match.com has ever been interested in me, and when you date someone from online dating you never really know if they are really interested in you or are just trying to date for the sake of dating (which is why I want other options). Well there was this SKETCHY guy I met on a plane who wouldn't leave me alone. But that's it. No one was interested in me in college or graduate school (which was just the last two years) and the 6 years I wasn't in college or grad school, I never met any guys.
I'm unattractive because I gained like at least 40 lbs and got out of shape within like 2 months and can't get back, and I have to wear really frumpy unflattering clothes.
well, far be it for me to make suggestions, but perhaps saying hello to someone who is also alone at a show could be a positive thing....not too much downside, IMHO.
I socialize as much as I can (even though I've been very nervous about it lately, I still make an effort). But I still don't have a ton of opportunities to socialize. I only know a few people in the area (and sorry but they're kinda boring). I plyed soccer in the fall which was really fun and there were cool people, but I didn't like, make any friends from it. We're supposed to get the team up for the spring so maybe I will meet more people, I dunno.
Um, well no one I didn't meet on match.com has ever been interested in me, and when you date someone from online dating you never really know if they are really interested in you or are just trying to date for the sake of dating (which is why I want other options). Well there was this SKETCHY guy I met on a plane who wouldn't leave me alone. But that's it. No one was interested in me in college or graduate school (which was just the last two years) and the 6 years I wasn't in college or grad school, I never met any guys.
I'm unattractive because I gained like at least 40 lbs and got out of shape within like 2 months and can't get back, and I have to wear really frumpy unflattering clothes.
I remember you. I thought I knew you. :-D We've talked on this board quite a few times.
I dunno... I stopped worrying about who I was going to date and then shortly after that one just kind of fell in my lap. Just be true to yourself and see what happens. If you're really trying to get this moving along though, I suggest not meeting people online and meeting them in person. Never got into the online thing. Just smile a lot and say hi!
I remember you. I thought I knew you. :-D We've talked on this board quite a few times.
I dunno... I stopped worrying about who I was going to date and then shortly after that one just kind of fell in my lap. Just be true to yourself and see what happens. If you're really trying to get this moving along though, I suggest not meeting people online and meeting them in person. Never got into the online thing. Just smile a lot and say hi!
Oh I don't really worry about it per se. I like being single, and I don't think that dating is all it's cracked up to be (but that's sort of why I am interested in this because all my friends say it's because I haven't met the "right" people). I've just been starting to get bored lately as my job is less than inspiring, and I realized that if I want to date again, I'm going to be screwed because I really don't know how. I'm basically back in the same place I was like 6 years ago. Without online dating plus the extra 40 lbs, I'm pretty much screwed. And as far is this thread goes, I've just never understood how it all works and it really baffles me, so I thought I would try to figure it out once and for all.
Comments
the last one was a really long time ago and that was at work
we were friends, significant others, back to friends and now she's married
Albany 2006 Camden 2006 E. Rutherford 2, 2006 Inglewood 2006,
Chicago 2007
Camden 2008 MSG 2008 MSG 2008 Hartford 2008.
Seattle 2009 Seattle 2009 Philadelphia 2009,Philadelphia 2009 Philadelphia 2009
Hartford 2010 MSG 2010 MSG 2010
Toronto 2011,Toronto 2011
Wrigley Field 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Philadelphia 2, 2013
Philadelphia 1, 2016 Philadelphia 2 2016 New York 2016 New York 2016 Fenway 1, 2016
Fenway 2, 2018
MSG 2022
St. Paul, 1, St. Paul 2 2023
MSG 2024, MSG 2024
Philadelphia 2024
"I play good, hard-nosed basketball.
Things happen in the game. Nothing you
can do. I don't go and say,
"I'm gonna beat this guy up."
Is there a way to know this? Every time I've had this feeling, I've been wrong. I mean everything SEEMS to line up with what people say, but I still get it wrong. It's like every math test I've ever taken, I *know* the stuff, but I still get the wrong answer.
ok I'm going to give an example here. A couple years ago when I was in grad school I was taking a class through a different program. there was this cute guy in the class...I assumed he was out of my league, so I would just kinda look at him and smile and stuff, never bothered trying anything. One day I was sitting there before class and I looked up from what I was doing and out of nowhere, he walks all the way around the room, sticks his hand out, and just introduces himself, for no reason. I was so shocked, I could barely remember my name. I figured no one would do this if they weren't like interested, you know. So I took every excuse to talk to him and even once emailed him for some stupid reason! But nothing happened...he never asked me out. But still it was just so weird, it really seemed like he liked me. My friend who knew him said he was just a really friendly guy.
:( I do this. I must be doing it wrong.
that is freaking hilarious.
she lets go
Is this from 1952?
You win some, you lose some
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
2, he got my number and we went on a date.
We go in, her dog in tow, and he makes a b-line to this guy covered in tatoos, and covers him with licks and love.
I'm thinking hmmmm! I am not sure and I go hide behind the paintchips.My palms start sweating, my heart starts beating and then he comes over and asks me" what are you looking for? What color?" with a big smile.
I stammer and try and get out something that kind of resembles english and paint color. " Do you have any suede paint, you know the kind that is a little texturized?"
2.He left with us and comes back for dinner. First he fixed her Bar-B Que and cooked us steaks. We had about 2 hours to talk,all 3 of us, then he walked me home. Then a little magic happened.
3. He wrote his number on a notepad piece of paper with his full name. I laughed at it. His last name is sooooo common. I added " Are you serious, that's your last name?" "Yeah, it is!"
4.Transition was pretty immediate from there: I stood two steps higher than him on my stairs outside my apartment, so we were face to face and I planted a kiss on his lips. Wow! Electric and very tender. 10 seconds, enough to feel the warmth of his breath and softness of his lips. No tongue.
5.Then I couldn't sleep for hours, I was floating. I felt like I was 15 again, being kissed for the very first time.
6.He called me the next day. I made him wait for "it" for 3 weeks.It was torture for me as well, but so worth it.
Anatole France
this kind of thing doesn't usually happen in real life...I'm a bit skeptical if this is real...good for you if it is, but I get the feeling I'm being duped here...
One day I got the balls to go in to the store and ask him out to a bar with me and my friends. He accepted and came out. We had a good time and then I asked him to dinner 2 days later. We had a lot in common and we hit it off so we started dating and then a month later I moved in :eek: I move quickly
This is just the kind of thing in life where you put yourself out there. I was single for 5 years before I met him. Dating losers and such here and there, but no real connection.
And for your information, we are still happily in love and living together.He's my best friend and my lover.
We also fucking hate Valentine's Day. Where's that thread this year?
Just thought I would share our story.
Cynicism kills romance!!!
Anatole France
oh there's several anti v-day threads
ok, i'm sorry I doubted you. how did your friend know such an awesome guy? (I've never known anyone who knows anyone) and why didn't she just take him for herself?
I have heard from others that have lost a friend( even a casual one) over this type of match making.
Some people have a hard time seein gothers in love, and connecting. I myself love to see couples sharing their love., whether new or old.
I still hate V-day though. Like the other manmade holidays.
Life is for living. Not planning.
Anatole France
What's a gother?
I'm teasing, I love your story
The best expression of Love is Time.
The best time to Love is Now.
I'm never as good as when you're there.........
CUTE!!
I guess it's going to be back to match.com for me though eventually, because none of these things seem like that things that would happen in my life.
ugh, I really really want to do it without the crutch though. it's very depressing. you end up dating people because you're both just there, not because you really like them. I want someone to like me first (or hell even just think I'm cute) and then ask me out :(.
I had met my GF through a friend a few times, then I started running into her at concerts. At a Pogues show in Oct 06, I turned on my quirky charm, then asked her friend to give me her email address.
I made a point of asking her to dinner alone, so that my intentions were know. I feel its best to be direct, as opposed to dropping hints and then wondering!
We knew we liked each other based on the chemistry we had. No words were needed!
howcome I never meet anyone like this? My friends don't seem to know ANYONE and if they did I doubt they would be the types of people I'd run into at shows!
Do you have any gig buddies?
I know a bunch of people that I only see at gigs....they are a good source for introductions!
boston area...
I socialize as much as I can (even though I've been very nervous about it lately, I still make an effort). But I still don't have a ton of opportunities to socialize. I only know a few people in the area (and sorry but they're kinda boring). I plyed soccer in the fall which was really fun and there were cool people, but I didn't like, make any friends from it. We're supposed to get the team up for the spring so maybe I will meet more people, I dunno.
Um, well no one I didn't meet on match.com has ever been interested in me, and when you date someone from online dating you never really know if they are really interested in you or are just trying to date for the sake of dating (which is why I want other options). Well there was this SKETCHY guy I met on a plane who wouldn't leave me alone. But that's it. No one was interested in me in college or graduate school (which was just the last two years) and the 6 years I wasn't in college or grad school, I never met any guys.
I'm unattractive because I gained like at least 40 lbs and got out of shape within like 2 months and can't get back, and I have to wear really frumpy unflattering clothes.
no, I go to shows alone or with my brother.
do you see the same people at many of the shows?
umm...never really noticed. only at PJ shows.
well, far be it for me to make suggestions, but perhaps saying hello to someone who is also alone at a show could be a positive thing....not too much downside, IMHO.
I remember you. I thought I knew you. :-D We've talked on this board quite a few times.
I dunno... I stopped worrying about who I was going to date and then shortly after that one just kind of fell in my lap. Just be true to yourself and see what happens. If you're really trying to get this moving along though, I suggest not meeting people online and meeting them in person. Never got into the online thing. Just smile a lot and say hi!
Oh I don't really worry about it per se. I like being single, and I don't think that dating is all it's cracked up to be (but that's sort of why I am interested in this because all my friends say it's because I haven't met the "right" people). I've just been starting to get bored lately as my job is less than inspiring, and I realized that if I want to date again, I'm going to be screwed because I really don't know how. I'm basically back in the same place I was like 6 years ago. Without online dating plus the extra 40 lbs, I'm pretty much screwed. And as far is this thread goes, I've just never understood how it all works and it really baffles me, so I thought I would try to figure it out once and for all.