I don't think that you can try to explain physical chemistry in a plain, logical sense...
Being 'in love' with someone is different things to different people...
'Falling in Love' and 'Being in Love' are very different as well...
My best explanation of what 'falling in love' feels like is 'complete retardation'
'Being in Love' on the other hand... is the most beautiful, sound, secure feeling in the world... feeling like you are exactly where you belong... with the person you belong with
I'm not necessarily talk about "falling in love." I'm talking like, starting any type of relationship whether it be a hook up, a month of dating, or like forever. whatever. I just don't get how it all happens in the first place.
My best explanation of what 'falling in love' feels like is 'complete retardation'
You nailed it with that one
My whole life
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
how/why did you kiss her if you already knew her in a work relationship?
not sure what you mean?
how? when she got out of my car after the first date I grabbed her and kissed her
why? because I really liked her
My whole life
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
2. He was married when I met him, and I was friends with his wife. They later divorced. I tried setting him up with friends of mine but nothing worked out. Then we just became really good friends. Then we fell in love. He says he knew before me- it took me a little longer as I did just think of him as a friend at first.
"I'd rather be with an animal." "Those that can be trusted can change their mind." "The in between is mine." "If I don't lose control, explore and not explode, a preternatural other plane with the power to maintain." "Yeh this is living." "Life is what you make it."
We worked in the same office (though not in the same department, but our cubicles were right next to each other). When I first started, he kept trying to introduce himself to me, but every time he came over I was always on the phone! Finally he did, and every day we would chat. Also, the way my desk was set-up, the person who worked there before me had a mirror above her computer so she could see when someone walked up behind her. Well, I noticed that every time he walked by he would always look over at me. Things were flirty between us, but sometimes it is hard to tell when someone "likes" you that way. Then for the holidays I baked some people cookies, and I gave him a plate. A couple days later, he had left a note on my desk thanking me for the cookies and asking me out for a drink! We had to keep it a secret because he was a student worker and even though we worked in units didn't want people to know...although the people next to us know.
But still, I agree that sometimes it is hard to tell if you are a couple. But one time I was at his apartment and his roommate asked us, "So, are you guys like a couple now?" I was so embarrassed, but my ex said "yes." And then we were a couple! After that things got crappy and I would've been better offnot dating him, but I guess it is a cute story anyway!
ok see this is somewhat useful, he asked you out on a date in such a way that it was clear he was asking you out on a DATE, even though you knew each other work, so I guess from there it is the same as getting a date on match.com. I mean you can't just go out and replicate this, because someone needs to want to ask you out on a date. but I get it, this is a nice simple one (though I am surprised that someone asked a coworker out on a date...I wish I could ask HIM what was going through HIS mind).
1) How did you MEET your significant other (or your last one)? Work? School? Bar? Match.com? Did one of you drop your papers on the street and look up and see the other one and fall in love at first sight?
I met my fiance through a friend. I was over at her house and he was coming over (he is her little brother). He needed a place to stay so my roommate invited him to stay at our house. I was cool with that too. We became really good friends and started hanging out a lot.
2) How did you then TRANSITION from just knowing this person or liking them to actually being in a romantic relationship? Did you ask them out on a date and then it was just implied? Did you suddenly like kiss or something? Did you just like, tell them you liked them?
Well we were flirty a lot. We both knew we liked each other but I had some reservations. He even texted me one day and asked why we couldn't go out.... One day some other guy came over and showed a lot of interest. I was bored at the time so I was going to go out with him. Tommy, my fiance, and I were sitting in the living room and he just kissed me, picked me up and took me up to my room. And the rest is history! ;-D
I'm not necessarily talk about "falling in love." I'm talking like, starting any type of relationship whether it be a hook up, a month of dating, or like forever. whatever. I just don't get how it all happens in the first place.
Well... it starts with 'intention'...
physical attraction...
one person feels 'excited' ... 'interested' in becoming physically intimate with another person... they show signs of this... either subtly or overtly... could be a gently brush against someone's arm, making direct eye contact... or more direct by kissing or full body hug...
if the intial contact is accepted and reciprocated by the other... the physical intimacy progresses...
Boy... that sounds dry and clincial :( maybe you should try reading some light erotica ?? Might get your system charged up and firing...
Exercising her will to lose control...
she lets go
1) How did you MEET your significant other (or your last one)? Work? School? Bar? Match.com? Did one of you drop your papers on the street and look up and see the other one and fall in love at first sight?
I met my fiance through a friend. I was over at her house and he was coming over (he is her little brother). He needed a place to stay so my roommate invited him to stay at our house. I was cool with that too. We became really good friends and started hanging out a lot.
2) How did you then TRANSITION from just knowing this person or liking them to actually being in a romantic relationship? Did you ask them out on a date and then it was just implied? Did you suddenly like kiss or something? Did you just like, tell them you liked them?
Well we were flirty a lot. We both knew we liked each other but I had some reservations. He even texted me one day and asked why we couldn't go out.... One day some other guy came over and showed a lot of interest. I was bored at the time so I was going to go out with him. Tommy, my fiance, and I were sitting in the living room and he just kissed me, picked me up and took me up to my room. And the rest is history! ;-D
thanks for the help with my research!!!
[/quote]
hmm for a lot of people here, the other person liked them enough to make some kind of unmistakable move.
one person feels 'excited' ... 'interested' in becoming physically intimate with another person... they show signs of this... either subtly or overtly... could be a gently brush against someone's arm, making direct eye contact... or more direct by kissing or full body hug...
if the intial contact is accepted and reciprocated by the other... the physical intimacy progresses...
Boy... that sounds dry and clincial :( maybe you should try reading some light erotica ?? Might get your system charged up and firing...
haha I don't need to get my system charged up. I'm not taking my pills this week because I kept forgetting to go to the pharmacy, so now I have to wait until sunday to NOT be fired up anymore...
hmmm, I've flirted with a few people before, but it's never progressed the way you put it-it doesn't go any further. after reading some of these things I think maybe I am just not attractive/likable. But then I think that I *know* people who have obviously had things progress the right way and they aren't attractive or nice or interesting.
haha I don't need to get my system charged up. I'm not taking my pills this week because I kept forgetting to go to the pharmacy, so now I have to wait until sunday to NOT be fired up anymore...
hmmm, I've flirted with a few people before, but it's never progressed the way you put it-it doesn't go any further. after reading some of these things I think maybe I am just not attractive/likable. But then I think that I *know* people who have obviously had things progress the right way and they aren't attractive or nice or interesting.
This I KNOW is true...
You are what you project...
Exercising her will to lose control...
she lets go
my curiosity about these things is never satisfied... this is something I just can't figure our how many people I ask and how many times it comes up on this board. So as specifically as possible, please answer these 2 questions for me:
1) How did you MEET your significant other (or your last one)? Work? School? Bar? Match.com? Did one of you drop your papers on the street and look up and see the other one and fall in love at first sight?
2) How did you then TRANSITION from just knowing this person or liking them to actually being in a romantic relationship? Did you ask them out on a date and then it was just implied? Did you suddenly like kiss or something? Did you just like, tell them you liked them?
thanks for the help with my research!!!
1) I met my wife when I was in college. We lived in the same dorm my sophomore year and met through a mutual friend.
2) We met in January and started our romantic relationship in April. At first we were just in the friends and getting to know each other stage. Then I think we both realized we had feelings for one another and we started flirting around the beginning of March. When I knew that I wanted to be in a relationship with her, I finally mustered enough courage to just tell her how I felt and that I wanted to be with her. 5 years later and now we're married and are happily in love.
1) We met on here...specifically on the msn thread
2) And we transitioned by chatting...then phone calls...then in-person visits...just getting to know each other, talking about similar interests and being really open.
well I think I project that I am nice and interesting, better than a lot of people I know!. I'm pretty unattractive at the moment, but for a couple years I was fairly attractive.
I think I must be giving off some sort of chemical or something that is bad?
well I think I project that I am nice and interesting, better than a lot of people I know!. I'm pretty unattractive at the moment, but for a couple years I was fairly attractive.
I think I must be giving off some sort of chemical or something that is bad?
No chemical....
From the sounds of it....you aren't interested in being "moved" in on. Whether intentional or not, women give signals on whether your move is ok or not.
Make some eye contact with men...give a smile...I bet some will make a move.
well I have a few times, but it doesn't go down the way it normally does (I am probably not doing something right). But I don't get all that many chances to try anyway.
when it comes down to it, I've had to try to do something a lot, while most other girls seem to just sit back and they come to them. I'm always worrying about whether *I* should make a move (it's never really crossed my mind that a guy would actually make a move on me). I guess that's why I'm so interested in how these moves are made.
so...you just kissed someone you had to see everyday? shit. that's craziness!
Like I said, we talked a lot leading up to it... You kind of get an idea that the other person has feelings too. It's not like I just walked up to some random girl at work and planted one on her.
At some point you have to take a chance, or you will never get anything.
My whole life
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
a look (not a creepy stare), a laugh, a smile, a touch (even just a light rush on thier shoulder or hand when you talk)....your body language. You dont' have to speak your intensions.
If the girl you are with is interested in you, she will exhibit certain signs of attraction and arousal. Each little mannerism, for example the sparkle in her eyes, her tone of voice, her body language should be taken into consideration when trying to decide if the lady you are with is genuinely interested in you.
Signs Of Arousal
Wide, easy smiles accompanied with a relaxed face. She blushes frequently and her skin tone become redder.
She maintains eye contact throughout and her pupils are dilated (they become larger). She would often blink more frequently than usual and her eye lashes flutter. You might even notice a sparkle in her eye. The eyes are windows to the soul and are one of the most accurate ways of telling if she is attracted to you.
Subconscious biting of the lips or showing of the tongue, wetting her lips or even chewing her fingernails.
While talking, she is slowly stroking her cocktail glass (or any cylindrical object) up and down with her thumb and index finger. (reveals what she is thinking of, if you get my meaning) She might also be fiddling with her jewelry.
She starts sitting up and her arms aren't limp. If her crossed leg is pointing in your general direction and rocking back and forth.
She adjusts the tone and pitch of her voice to match yours. In fact, any sigh that she is mimicking you can be taken as a sign of interest. For example, laughing in unison or crossing her legs if you've crossed yours.
She winks at you in the middle of a conversation or even from a distance. This means she really is interested in you. Even exposing the palms of her hand facing you show that she might be interested in you as it has been proven to be a subconscious sign telling you that she has nothing to hide.
She twirls her hair around her fingers or perhaps strokes her hair lightly with her hand while maintaining eye contact.
Should you have any questions, you can use the Romance Forums to post your queries and give advice. If you found the information here helpful, could you return the favor by referring us to a friend? It's the least you can do.
Exercising her will to lose control...
she lets go
Comments
well I have a few times. they've all been irish, which used to seem like a weird coincidence but now thanks to helen I've had it explained...
I'm not necessarily talk about "falling in love." I'm talking like, starting any type of relationship whether it be a hook up, a month of dating, or like forever. whatever. I just don't get how it all happens in the first place.
True. But I was in that bar for 7 hours before she did that.
You nailed it with that one
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
There was no alcohol involved in our kiss. But, we had an unusual meeting and courtship!
how/why did you kiss her if you already knew her in a work relationship?
Yes! Combine that with a warm buzz that lasts for months on end, and that's how I felt.
not sure what you mean?
how? when she got out of my car after the first date I grabbed her and kissed her
why? because I really liked her
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
2. He was married when I met him, and I was friends with his wife. They later divorced. I tried setting him up with friends of mine but nothing worked out. Then we just became really good friends. Then we fell in love.
ok see this is somewhat useful, he asked you out on a date in such a way that it was clear he was asking you out on a DATE, even though you knew each other work, so I guess from there it is the same as getting a date on match.com. I mean you can't just go out and replicate this, because someone needs to want to ask you out on a date. but I get it, this is a nice simple one (though I am surprised that someone asked a coworker out on a date...I wish I could ask HIM what was going through HIS mind).
so...you just kissed someone you had to see everyday? shit. that's craziness!
I met my fiance through a friend. I was over at her house and he was coming over (he is her little brother). He needed a place to stay so my roommate invited him to stay at our house. I was cool with that too. We became really good friends and started hanging out a lot.
2) How did you then TRANSITION from just knowing this person or liking them to actually being in a romantic relationship? Did you ask them out on a date and then it was just implied? Did you suddenly like kiss or something? Did you just like, tell them you liked them?
Well we were flirty a lot. We both knew we liked each other but I had some reservations. He even texted me one day and asked why we couldn't go out.... One day some other guy came over and showed a lot of interest. I was bored at the time so I was going to go out with him. Tommy, my fiance, and I were sitting in the living room and he just kissed me, picked me up and took me up to my room. And the rest is history! ;-D
thanks for the help with my research!!![/quote]
Well... it starts with 'intention'...
physical attraction...
one person feels 'excited' ... 'interested' in becoming physically intimate with another person... they show signs of this... either subtly or overtly... could be a gently brush against someone's arm, making direct eye contact... or more direct by kissing or full body hug...
if the intial contact is accepted and reciprocated by the other... the physical intimacy progresses...
Boy... that sounds dry and clincial :( maybe you should try reading some light erotica ??
she lets go
hmm for a lot of people here, the other person liked them enough to make some kind of unmistakable move.
If one doesn't do anything, how is anything supposed to happen?
haha I don't need to get my system charged up. I'm not taking my pills this week because I kept forgetting to go to the pharmacy, so now I have to wait until sunday to NOT be fired up anymore...
hmmm, I've flirted with a few people before, but it's never progressed the way you put it-it doesn't go any further. after reading some of these things I think maybe I am just not attractive/likable. But then I think that I *know* people who have obviously had things progress the right way and they aren't attractive or nice or interesting.
This I KNOW is true...
You are what you project...
she lets go
well that's really exactly what I'm trying to get at. No one's ever "done" anything to me, so I don't know what goes down in that part.
2) We met in January and started our romantic relationship in April. At first we were just in the friends and getting to know each other stage. Then I think we both realized we had feelings for one another and we started flirting around the beginning of March. When I knew that I wanted to be in a relationship with her, I finally mustered enough courage to just tell her how I felt and that I wanted to be with her. 5 years later and now we're married and are happily in love.
2) And we transitioned by chatting...then phone calls...then in-person visits...just getting to know each other, talking about similar interests and being really open.
How about trying to do something?
well I think I project that I am nice and interesting, better than a lot of people I know!. I'm pretty unattractive at the moment, but for a couple years I was fairly attractive.
I think I must be giving off some sort of chemical or something that is bad?
perhaps you have to try being the aggressor?
she lets go
wait, that sounds dirty
No chemical....
From the sounds of it....you aren't interested in being "moved" in on. Whether intentional or not, women give signals on whether your move is ok or not.
Make some eye contact with men...give a smile...I bet some will make a move.
well I have a few times, but it doesn't go down the way it normally does (I am probably not doing something right). But I don't get all that many chances to try anyway.
when it comes down to it, I've had to try to do something a lot, while most other girls seem to just sit back and they come to them. I'm always worrying about whether *I* should make a move (it's never really crossed my mind that a guy would actually make a move on me). I guess that's why I'm so interested in how these moves are made.
what are the signals?
Like I said, we talked a lot leading up to it... You kind of get an idea that the other person has feelings too. It's not like I just walked up to some random girl at work and planted one on her.
At some point you have to take a chance, or you will never get anything.
was like a picture
of a sunny day
“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.”
― Abraham Lincoln
a look (not a creepy stare), a laugh, a smile, a touch (even just a light rush on thier shoulder or hand when you talk)....your body language. You dont' have to speak your intensions.
Signs Of Arousal
Wide, easy smiles accompanied with a relaxed face. She blushes frequently and her skin tone become redder.
She maintains eye contact throughout and her pupils are dilated (they become larger). She would often blink more frequently than usual and her eye lashes flutter. You might even notice a sparkle in her eye. The eyes are windows to the soul and are one of the most accurate ways of telling if she is attracted to you.
Subconscious biting of the lips or showing of the tongue, wetting her lips or even chewing her fingernails.
While talking, she is slowly stroking her cocktail glass (or any cylindrical object) up and down with her thumb and index finger. (reveals what she is thinking of, if you get my meaning) She might also be fiddling with her jewelry.
She starts sitting up and her arms aren't limp. If her crossed leg is pointing in your general direction and rocking back and forth.
She adjusts the tone and pitch of her voice to match yours. In fact, any sigh that she is mimicking you can be taken as a sign of interest. For example, laughing in unison or crossing her legs if you've crossed yours.
She winks at you in the middle of a conversation or even from a distance. This means she really is interested in you. Even exposing the palms of her hand facing you show that she might be interested in you as it has been proven to be a subconscious sign telling you that she has nothing to hide.
She twirls her hair around her fingers or perhaps strokes her hair lightly with her hand while maintaining eye contact.
Should you have any questions, you can use the Romance Forums to post your queries and give advice. If you found the information here helpful, could you return the favor by referring us to a friend? It's the least you can do.
she lets go