then men should never have to pay child support correct? becos it is not his child, it is hers.
That's a good point.
I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
it was intended to show the ridiculousness in discounting men's contributions to child-rearing. the last time i checked, no woman can give birth without a man.
au contraire. we can give birth without a man. i've done it. we just can't grow a baby without your input.yet!
hear my name
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
I am completely for a woman's right to choose. Completely. But it seems there are even some within the prochoice movement who believe after a certain amount of months or trimesters, that that power should be taken away from women.
Am I odd in being for abortion ANYTIME in a pregnancy. Anytime. I dont think after the third trimester it should be outlawed.
The way I see it your for abortion or your not for it. I am for it. So abortion anytime during the pregnancy seems fair
This sounds odd from someone concerned about the welfare of cows, chickens, and baby seals.
it was intended to show the ridiculousness in discounting men's contributions to child-rearing. the last time i checked, no woman can give birth without a man.
guess i missed the humor, and the posts discounting a man's contributions.
*edit - and catefrances did well differentiating there. a trip to the sperm bank is all.
however, in all seriousness....no one is denying a man's pivotal role and we can talk in circles about that too as usually occurs. i whole-heartedly agree a man should absolutely be consulted in such issues, however, bottomline when push comes to shove if a man and woman cannot agree, i believe the decision lies with the female simply b/c it IS in her body. all know the law as it stands, and i personally think a man and woman at the very least should discuss such 'what-ifs' before engaging in sexual relations. after the fact, it's just a shame if they're not on the same page...but BOTH parties shgould know their rights, etc beforehand.
no you cannot. as you acknowledged, without a man, there is no pregnancy.
ah but that's not what you said. you said a woman couldn't give birth without a man. and i assured you we could. as i myself have done. conception is another thing altogether. but that's not what we were talking about.
hear my name
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
ah but that's not what you said. you said a woman couldn't give birth without a man. and i assured you we could. as i myself have done. conception is another thing altogether. but that's not what we were talking about.
it is what we were talking about. without a man there is no conception, without conception there is no birth. tell me one person who ever gave birth without any male contribution? it is biologically impossible.
bottom line being, do you agree that men should never have to pay child support? it is never their child correct?
it is what we were talking about. without a man there is no conception, without conception there is no birth. tell me one person who ever gave birth without any male contribution? it is biologically impossible.
bottom line being, do you agree that men should never have to pay child support? it is never their child correct?
no i do not agree that men should never pay child support. if two people have come to an agreed decision to have the children in the first place then BOTH of them should take responsibility for the children.
hear my name
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
no i do not agree that men should never pay child support. if two people have come to an agreed decision to have the children in the first place then BOTH of them should take responsibility for the children.
both? then how come men aren't even allowed to open their mouths or have any say when a woman is pregnant? doesn't have some resposbility for that child?
both? then how come men aren't even allowed to open their mouths or have any say when a woman is pregnant? doesn't have some resposbility for that child?
they do...beforehand. you know full well the laws BEFORE you engage in sex, so unless you trust the woman enough to stand by her word, and obviously discuss such issues beforehand.....what else should you expect? and even then, it's been said countless times, women who have thought one way beforehand, but when faced with the very real pregnancy, had a change of heart. i imagine it is very diffuclt to know with absolute certainty what one wants to do when faced with undesired pregnancy. so it is definitely a risk. if a man is uncomfortable with these options...be damn sure you protect yourself b/c you know full well the possible legal consequences if you don't. you are fully aware of the laws and consequences....so don';t be surprised when faced with em. if one doesn't like that, fight to change those laws if you disagree..and in the meantime, don't have sex w/o at least double protection then. there is always choice in the equation somewhere.
they do...beforehand. you know full well the laws BEFORE you engage in sex, so unless you trust the woman enough to stand by her word, and obviously discuss such issues beforehand.....what else should you expect? and even then, it's been said countless times, women who have thought one way beforehand, but when faced with the very real pregnancy, had a change of heart. i imagine it is very diffuclt to know with absolute certainty what one wants to do when faced with undesired pregnancy. so it is definitely a risk. if a man is uncomfortable with these options...be damn sure you protect yourself b/c you know full well the possible legal consequences if you don't. you are fully aware of the laws and consequences....so don';t be surprised when faced with em. if one doesn't like that, fight to change those laws if you disagree..and in the meantime, don't have sex w/o at least double protection then. there is always choice in the equation somewhere.
so how come a woman can change her mind but a man cannot? i think the fact that there's some 9 month window where men are as meaningful as a steaming pile of shit to a woman is messed up.
both? then how come men aren't even allowed to open their mouths or have any say when a woman is pregnant? doesn't have some resposbility for that child?
oh please. men are allowed to open their mouths. they are allowed to voice their opinion even. but a man can not impose his will upon a woman to carry a pregnancy to term. woman are not incubators for the species.
as for a woman choosing to carry to term and raise the child against the wishes of the father, then she must assume responsibility for that decision.
hear my name
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
so how come a woman can change her mind but a man cannot? i think the fact that there's some 9 month window where men are as meaningful as a steaming pile of shit to a woman is messed up.
simple: b/c it grows in HER BODY. your comments are truly amusing really.....b/c sure, that's what we're saying, a man's opinion is as meaningful as a pile of steaming shit. :rolleyes: of COURSE that is messed up. hopefully if faced with such a situation, the couple will care about each other, their wishes, etc. it's not meaningless....but if it comes down to both being diametrically opposed to the other's wishes, well then, it falls to the woman's wishes simply b/c it all involves HER BODY. as previously mentioned, men should be WELL aware that this is the case BEFOREHAND, and if you don't like it...then either don't have sex...or be CERTAIN protection, preferably 2 forms, are being utilized. however, you often seem to think you 'know' exactly how all women think, so continue on that path it seems to serve you well.
i have an idea what i 'might' do if faced with an unwanted pregnancy...but i honestly cannot say i 'know' with 100% certainty what i would ultimately do until faced with such. luckily, i never have....yet. and at different times in life, different circumstances, i think the same woman could make very different choices. until it actually occurs, i think it's dtruly impossible to 'know' what you would do. there are many scenarios in life just like that. i don't think it's crazy that a woman has the final say and right to change her mind for something that grows in her body, affects her health...for 9 months and beyond.
What cracks me up is all these men basing their argument on this notion of a woman being pregnant, and the man is just dying for her to have that baby yet she's aborting it. HA! Nine times out of ten in an unwanted pregnancy ending in abortion, the woman makes that choice under pressure from the man who doesn't want to be stuck with her, her kid, or anything that cuts into his precious bank account.
What men really want is to never have to pay a dime. As I said before, boo freaking hoo about paying child support. If you're not going to get a vasectomy or wear a condom, you risking paying to play, gentlemen. Deal with it.
The kids of today should defend themselves against the Seventies Nineties.
what I am getting at was discussed in the 2004 prez debates. I was struck how similar Bush and Kerry were in terms of the issue of abortion. kerry was more prochoice than Bush but Kerry was against abortion after a certain trimester. I thought to myself watching the debates that this wasnt really a difference between the two on the issue. They both were basically antiabortion.
It seems to me the antithesis of prochoice to be against abortion in the third trimester. Your for abortion or against it as I said previously.
To be prochoice but to be against it during the third trimester seems silly and I dont know why people would call themselves for a womens right to choose if this is what they felt.
A woman should have a right to choose what to do. If this means getting an abortion in the third trimester, then that should be alright.
Well I look at this way, if the baby was to be born prematurely, the rate of survival at that point is pretty good, girls are actually higher rate of survival than boys. At that point of the pregnancy, meaning within the 3rd trimester, it should not be allowed.
I do consider myself pro-choice even if I do not agree with your statement but I will give you credit for being very honest with your opinion.
I have also had 2 wonderful PLANNED pregnancies, that once I heard the heartbeat, no matter what the end result, I would had not termed them. I am referring to the downs test and the trisomy tests etc. I figured I was to be their mom no matter what.
With that being said, my cousin Laura Joy was born 12/4/05 and died 12/7/05 because she had trisomy 13, in which my cousin found out much earlier into her pregnancy, I think like September/Oct the test results confirmed. I do not know what was worse. Knowing that either the baby was to come still born, to die minutes after birth, days later or weeks later. My 2nd son was born 8/2005. I would go home from work at night and I while nursed him, I would just rub his little head, and cry because it broke my heart that cousin had to go through that, she had to explain it to her other kids and that Laura Joy was born just to die anyways.
Do I think I am a better person for knowing her for only for a couple of days or not knowing her at all. I don't know. I still cry sometimes though.
oh please. men are allowed to open their mouths. they are allowed to voice their opinion even. but a man can not impose his will upon a woman to carry a pregnancy to term. woman are not incubators for the species.
as for a woman choosing to carry to term and raise the child against the wishes of the father, then she must assume responsibility for that decision.
no she doesn't, becos she can still make the father pay for it for 18 years if he wanted an abortion. if she decides to terminate it, she can also deprive a father of a child he wanted to care for becos she didnt want to carry it.
Well I look at this way, if the baby was to be born prematurely, the rate of survival at that point is pretty good, girls are actually higher rate of survival than boys. At that point of the pregnancy, meaning within the 3rd trimester, it should not be allowed.
I do consider myself pro-choice even if I do not agree with your statement but I will give you credit for being very honest with your opinion.
I have also had 2 wonderful PLANNED pregnancies, that once I heard the heartbeat, no matter what the end result, I would had not termed them. I am referring to the downs test and the trisomy tests etc. I figured I was to be their mom no matter what.
With that being said, my cousin Laura Joy was born 12/4/05 and died 12/7/05 because she had trisomy 13, in which my cousin found out much earlier into her pregnancy, I think like September/Oct the test results confirmed. I do not know what was worse. Knowing that either the baby was to come still born, to die minutes after birth, days later or weeks later. My 2nd son was born 8/2005. I would go home from work at night and I while nursed him, I would just rub his little head, and cry because it broke my heart that cousin had to go through that, she had to explain it to her other kids and that Laura Joy was born just to die anyways.
Do I think I am a better person for knowing her for only for a couple of days or not knowing her at all. I don't know. I still cry sometimes though.
so well stated...and man, what a story. so sad. :( i had a cousin faced with a very similar situation. don't know if it was the exact same medical issue, all i do know is that she and her husbnad opted to abort the pregnancy rather than go full term knowing full well the baby would be stillborn or die soon after. in such situations, i don't think there is one 'right' answer...except what is 'right' for the couple/family...and i am glad that all do have that choice to make for themselves.
simple: b/c it grows in HER BODY. your comments are truly amusing really.....b/c sure, that's what we're saying, a man's opinion is as meaningful as a pile of steaming shit. :rolleyes: of COURSE that is messed up. hopefully if faced with such a situation, the couple will care about each other, their wishes, etc. it's not meaningless....but if it comes down to both being diametrically opposed to the other's wishes, well then, it falls to the woman's wishes simply b/c it all involves HER BODY. as previously mentioned, men should be WELL aware that this is the case BEFOREHAND, and if you don't like it...then either don't have sex...or be CERTAIN protection, preferably 2 forms, are being utilized. however, you often seem to think you 'know' exactly how all women think, so continue on that path it seems to serve you well.
i have an idea what i 'might' do if faced with an unwanted pregnancy...but i honestly cannot say i 'know' with 100% certainty what i would ultimately do until faced with such. luckily, i never have....yet. and at different times in life, different circumstances, i think the same woman could make very different choices. until it actually occurs, i think it's dtruly impossible to 'know' what you would do. there are many scenarios in life just like that. i don't think it's crazy that a woman has the final say and right to change her mind for something that grows in her body, affects her health...for 9 months and beyond.
im mainly just a bit prickly about this... i support choice, but sometimes the rhetoric they use is so one-sided it seems totally dismissive of the thought that men might care deeply about that child too and also have a little something at stake in a pregnancy.
no she doesn't, becos she can still make the father pay for it for 18 years if he wanted an abortion. if she decides to terminate it, she can also deprive a father of a child he wanted to care for becos she didnt want to carry it.
you are a damnable man sometimes. there just is no pleasing you is there?
hear my name
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
What cracks me up is all these men basing their argument on this notion of a woman being pregnant, and the man is just dying for her to have that baby yet she's aborting it. HA! Nine times out of ten in an unwanted pregnancy ending in abortion, the woman makes that choice under pressure from the man who doesn't want to be stuck with her, her kid, or anything that cuts into his precious bank account.
What men really want is to never have to pay a dime. As I said before, boo freaking hoo about paying child support. If you're not going to get a vasectomy or wear a condom, you risking paying to play, gentlemen. Deal with it.
speak to surferdude and ask him what he had to do to be able to see his child. the entire justice system is very callous towards fatherhood.
im mainly just a bit prickly about this... i support choice, but sometimes the rhetoric they use is so one-sided it seems totally dismissive of the thought that men might care deeply about that child too and also have a little something at stake in a pregnancy.
perhaps there are some women who do, although i personally believe that most woemn DO respect a man's input...and do wish to be in agreement with their partner, whether it is a one night stand, a BF, or a life partner. i think more often than not, a couple does come to terms and agree...although certainly not always as we are all well aware. however, i honestly do not see how that can change.
wqhile i fully agree a man's opinion should be weighed in, given respect...i ultimately think that when a coupel cannot agree, it should be the woman's choice. i'd like to think whether i am male or female..i'd think the same. as i've never been faced with the issue, i look towards other women and i DO fully believe qwuite simply, their body their ultimate choice. it may be 'unfair'...but nature made it unfair in that sense. and i do think it's just a wee bit offensve to state that women do not value a man's opinion and such, that they think of him as meaningless, etc..when simply, that is not the case 99% of the time. it's simply, in such situations a decision MUST be made...and if it can't be decided jointly, well, it does lie and i agree it should lie...with the individual who has the biggest stake in it...which is the person beatring said pregnancy/child/health risks, et al.
Well I look at this way, if the baby was to be born prematurely, the rate of survival at that point is pretty good, girls are actually higher rate of survival than boys. At that point of the pregnancy, meaning within the 3rd trimester, it should not be allowed.
I do consider myself pro-choice even if I do not agree with your statement but I will give you credit for being very honest with your opinion.
I have also had 2 wonderful PLANNED pregnancies, that once I heard the heartbeat, no matter what the end result, I would had not termed them. I am referring to the downs test and the trisomy tests etc. I figured I was to be their mom no matter what.
With that being said, my cousin Laura Joy was born 12/4/05 and died 12/7/05 because she had trisomy 13, in which my cousin found out much earlier into her pregnancy, I think like September/Oct the test results confirmed. I do not know what was worse. Knowing that either the baby was to come still born, to die minutes after birth, days later or weeks later. My 2nd son was born 8/2005. I would go home from work at night and I while nursed him, I would just rub his little head, and cry because it broke my heart that cousin had to go through that, she had to explain it to her other kids and that Laura Joy was born just to die anyways.
Do I think I am a better person for knowing her for only for a couple of days or not knowing her at all. I don't know. I still cry sometimes though.
I'm sorry about the death of your cousin's baby. However, understand that if that child suffered as a result of going full term with Trisomy 13, it doesn't matter whether it makes you a better person. It isn't about you.
I ended a planned pregnancy because of severe defects that would have resulted in tremendous suffering for my child. Yes, I knew that all kinds of people would have patted me on the head and told me how wonderful I was for "accepting my child" and going full term had I done so. But it wasn't about my need to feel like a saint. (Not saying that's why your cousin did it, I respect her right to her own choice for her own reasons, whatever they were.)
The reality was I fully accepted him, and as his mother I could not let him suffer. It wasn't about me, it was about HIM.
I knew that no amount of sympathy and praise I would have received from others would have assuaged his suffering.
Edited to add: I am his mom no matter what!
The kids of today should defend themselves against the Seventies Nineties.
speak to surferdude and ask him what he had to do to be able to see his child. the entire justice system is very callous towards fatherhood.
that's a shame. you know i never understood the mentality of woman who denied the father of their children access. not once did i ever deny the father of my children access. it just wouldn't ahve entered my mind. i would give anything to have the father of my children in their lives more. but alas he's not that interested to make the extra effort required . both my younger younger think he hung the moon. and that's depite the relationship breaking up while i was 6 months pregnant with the youngest. and there's no way i would ever involve the authorities.
hear my name
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
speak to surferdude and ask him what he had to do to be able to see his child. the entire justice system is very callous towards fatherhood.
It happens, I'm sure. It sucks for some guys, absolutely. I wouldn't deny that. But as the aunt of several kids whose various fathers never paid any support at all, or barely enough keep the family in table salt, I'm underwhelmed by the whole "father's should have absolute equal say in the pregnancy" argument.
Far more often it sucks for the kids and single mothers than it does for the fathers.
The kids of today should defend themselves against the Seventies Nineties.
I'm sorry about the death of your cousin's baby. However, understand that if that child suffered as a result of going full term with Trisomy 13, it doesn't matter whether it makes you a better person. It isn't about you.
quote]
I can respect and understand your point of view and I am sorry for your loss, you made a very difficult decision. And yes you will always be that baby's mom. But you know I can only speak about how I felt, so my story is about me.
I'm sorry about the death of your cousin's baby. However, understand that if that child suffered as a result of going full term with Trisomy 13, it doesn't matter whether it makes you a better person. It isn't about you.
quote]
I can respect and understand your point of view and I am sorry for your loss, you made a very difficult decision. And yes you will always be that baby's mom. But you know I can only speak about how I felt, so my story is about me.
Doesn't it feel good being given the opportunity to even speak about abortion?
Mom could've ended you 5 months in and you'd have been nothing more than a family secret.
So, congrats!
"Sarcasm: intellect on the offensive"
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Comments
then men should never have to pay child support correct? becos it is not his child, it is hers.
That's a good point.
au contraire. we can give birth without a man. i've done it.
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
This sounds odd from someone concerned about the welfare of cows, chickens, and baby seals.
all posts by ©gue_barium are protected under US copyright law and are not to be reproduced, exchanged or sold
except by express written permission of ©gue_barium, the author.
no you cannot. as you acknowledged, without a man, there is no pregnancy.
guess i missed the humor, and the posts discounting a man's contributions.
*edit - and catefrances did well differentiating there. a trip to the sperm bank is all.
however, in all seriousness....no one is denying a man's pivotal role and we can talk in circles about that too as usually occurs. i whole-heartedly agree a man should absolutely be consulted in such issues, however, bottomline when push comes to shove if a man and woman cannot agree, i believe the decision lies with the female simply b/c it IS in her body. all know the law as it stands, and i personally think a man and woman at the very least should discuss such 'what-ifs' before engaging in sexual relations. after the fact, it's just a shame if they're not on the same page...but BOTH parties shgould know their rights, etc beforehand.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
it is what we were talking about. without a man there is no conception, without conception there is no birth. tell me one person who ever gave birth without any male contribution? it is biologically impossible.
bottom line being, do you agree that men should never have to pay child support? it is never their child correct?
no i do not agree that men should never pay child support. if two people have come to an agreed decision to have the children in the first place then BOTH of them should take responsibility for the children.
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
both? then how come men aren't even allowed to open their mouths or have any say when a woman is pregnant? doesn't have some resposbility for that child?
they do...beforehand. you know full well the laws BEFORE you engage in sex, so unless you trust the woman enough to stand by her word, and obviously discuss such issues beforehand.....what else should you expect? and even then, it's been said countless times, women who have thought one way beforehand, but when faced with the very real pregnancy, had a change of heart. i imagine it is very diffuclt to know with absolute certainty what one wants to do when faced with undesired pregnancy. so it is definitely a risk. if a man is uncomfortable with these options...be damn sure you protect yourself b/c you know full well the possible legal consequences if you don't. you are fully aware of the laws and consequences....so don';t be surprised when faced with em. if one doesn't like that, fight to change those laws if you disagree..and in the meantime, don't have sex w/o at least double protection then. there is always choice in the equation somewhere.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
so how come a woman can change her mind but a man cannot? i think the fact that there's some 9 month window where men are as meaningful as a steaming pile of shit to a woman is messed up.
as for a woman choosing to carry to term and raise the child against the wishes of the father, then she must assume responsibility for that decision.
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
simple: b/c it grows in HER BODY. your comments are truly amusing really.....b/c sure, that's what we're saying, a man's opinion is as meaningful as a pile of steaming shit. :rolleyes: of COURSE that is messed up. hopefully if faced with such a situation, the couple will care about each other, their wishes, etc. it's not meaningless....but if it comes down to both being diametrically opposed to the other's wishes, well then, it falls to the woman's wishes simply b/c it all involves HER BODY. as previously mentioned, men should be WELL aware that this is the case BEFOREHAND, and if you don't like it...then either don't have sex...or be CERTAIN protection, preferably 2 forms, are being utilized. however, you often seem to think you 'know' exactly how all women think, so continue on that path it seems to serve you well.
i have an idea what i 'might' do if faced with an unwanted pregnancy...but i honestly cannot say i 'know' with 100% certainty what i would ultimately do until faced with such. luckily, i never have....yet. and at different times in life, different circumstances, i think the same woman could make very different choices. until it actually occurs, i think it's dtruly impossible to 'know' what you would do. there are many scenarios in life just like that. i don't think it's crazy that a woman has the final say and right to change her mind for something that grows in her body, affects her health...for 9 months and beyond.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
What men really want is to never have to pay a dime. As I said before, boo freaking hoo about paying child support. If you're not going to get a vasectomy or wear a condom, you risking paying to play, gentlemen. Deal with it.
Well I look at this way, if the baby was to be born prematurely, the rate of survival at that point is pretty good, girls are actually higher rate of survival than boys. At that point of the pregnancy, meaning within the 3rd trimester, it should not be allowed.
I do consider myself pro-choice even if I do not agree with your statement but I will give you credit for being very honest with your opinion.
I have also had 2 wonderful PLANNED pregnancies, that once I heard the heartbeat, no matter what the end result, I would had not termed them. I am referring to the downs test and the trisomy tests etc. I figured I was to be their mom no matter what.
With that being said, my cousin Laura Joy was born 12/4/05 and died 12/7/05 because she had trisomy 13, in which my cousin found out much earlier into her pregnancy, I think like September/Oct the test results confirmed. I do not know what was worse. Knowing that either the baby was to come still born, to die minutes after birth, days later or weeks later. My 2nd son was born 8/2005. I would go home from work at night and I while nursed him, I would just rub his little head, and cry because it broke my heart that cousin had to go through that, she had to explain it to her other kids and that Laura Joy was born just to die anyways.
Do I think I am a better person for knowing her for only for a couple of days or not knowing her at all. I don't know. I still cry sometimes though.
no she doesn't, becos she can still make the father pay for it for 18 years if he wanted an abortion. if she decides to terminate it, she can also deprive a father of a child he wanted to care for becos she didnt want to carry it.
so well stated...and man, what a story. so sad. :( i had a cousin faced with a very similar situation. don't know if it was the exact same medical issue, all i do know is that she and her husbnad opted to abort the pregnancy rather than go full term knowing full well the baby would be stillborn or die soon after. in such situations, i don't think there is one 'right' answer...except what is 'right' for the couple/family...and i am glad that all do have that choice to make for themselves.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
im mainly just a bit prickly about this... i support choice, but sometimes the rhetoric they use is so one-sided it seems totally dismissive of the thought that men might care deeply about that child too and also have a little something at stake in a pregnancy.
you are a damnable man sometimes. there just is no pleasing you is there?
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
speak to surferdude and ask him what he had to do to be able to see his child. the entire justice system is very callous towards fatherhood.
not when it comes to women
perhaps there are some women who do, although i personally believe that most woemn DO respect a man's input...and do wish to be in agreement with their partner, whether it is a one night stand, a BF, or a life partner. i think more often than not, a couple does come to terms and agree...although certainly not always as we are all well aware. however, i honestly do not see how that can change.
wqhile i fully agree a man's opinion should be weighed in, given respect...i ultimately think that when a coupel cannot agree, it should be the woman's choice. i'd like to think whether i am male or female..i'd think the same. as i've never been faced with the issue, i look towards other women and i DO fully believe qwuite simply, their body their ultimate choice. it may be 'unfair'...but nature made it unfair in that sense. and i do think it's just a wee bit offensve to state that women do not value a man's opinion and such, that they think of him as meaningless, etc..when simply, that is not the case 99% of the time. it's simply, in such situations a decision MUST be made...and if it can't be decided jointly, well, it does lie and i agree it should lie...with the individual who has the biggest stake in it...which is the person beatring said pregnancy/child/health risks, et al.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
I ended a planned pregnancy because of severe defects that would have resulted in tremendous suffering for my child. Yes, I knew that all kinds of people would have patted me on the head and told me how wonderful I was for "accepting my child" and going full term had I done so. But it wasn't about my need to feel like a saint. (Not saying that's why your cousin did it, I respect her right to her own choice for her own reasons, whatever they were.)
The reality was I fully accepted him, and as his mother I could not let him suffer. It wasn't about me, it was about HIM.
I knew that no amount of sympathy and praise I would have received from others would have assuaged his suffering.
Edited to add: I am his mom no matter what!
that's a shame. you know i never understood the mentality of woman who denied the father of their children access. not once did i ever deny the father of my children access. it just wouldn't ahve entered my mind. i would give anything to have the father of my children in their lives more. but alas he's not that interested to make the extra effort required . both my younger younger think he hung the moon. and that's depite the relationship breaking up while i was 6 months pregnant with the youngest. and there's no way i would ever involve the authorities.
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
Far more often it sucks for the kids and single mothers than it does for the fathers.
Thou shall not kill.
God doesn't fuck around, and I doubt anyone wants to go to hell, so I suggest not aborting any fetuses. Murderers.
Doesn't it feel good being given the opportunity to even speak about abortion?
Mom could've ended you 5 months in and you'd have been nothing more than a family secret.
So, congrats!
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08