Stone Gossard...

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  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    When not on tour, Stone Gossard works at his local laundromat as the change machine. He eats dollar bills, and shits out quarters for the customers.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard is not allowed back into the Lucky Parlor Massage Room. The last time he was there, his "happy ending" racked up a $356.98 cleaning bill to scrape the dried tapioca pudding off of the ceiling. And they still haven't located all of the masseuses that worked on him.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard was bathing naked in a river when some wild horses came across him...after the view of his full frontal - the stallions bowed down to his mightiness. Some people say, the poor horses still have complexes over their relative inadequacies.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone Gossard secretly likes to listen to Enya whilst burning nag champa and laying sprawled out on the floor repeatedly saying "everything is going to be ok"



    sorry...wondered whatever happened to this one...
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • randaldoesjersey
    randaldoesjersey Posts: 151
    Stone did interpretative dancing for all the songs in the "Into the Wild" soundtrack as further inspiration for Eddie. He requested to not be credited in the liner notes, as art is its own reward.
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Although Stones house does have curtains, he never closes them during "Sweet Lovemaking Time".
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Stone can be heard on the hotel room recordings of OJ Simpson. Just listen for all the "Mother F*ckers" and Voila! You'll hear Stone.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Stone is suing the Chinese Buffet restaurant for stealing his soon to be patented method of mincing garlic by bringing cloves outside and stomping on them in your dirty Nikes.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Stone was on a celebrity episode of "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader". Unfortunately, his show will never air as he beat down three 10 year olds and exposed himself after missing the 2nd grade math question.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • Sian-of-the-dead
    Sian-of-the-dead Posts: 8,963
    Stone Gossard learnt everything he knows from me :p
    Been to this many PJ shows: Reading 2006 London 2007 Manchester & London 2009 Dublin, Belfast, London, Nijmegen & Berlin 2010 Manchester 1 & Manchester 2 2012...

    ... and I still think Drive-By Truckers are better.
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Whenever Stone visits NYC he tags Subway cars. Unfortunately, his master works of art are rarely seen as he uses sidewalk chalk to complete them.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Stone has written a new book entitled "101 Erotic Moves To Perform On A Cardboard Toilet Paper Roll". While the title is wordy, he is hoping it will be a blockbuster due to Stone using images of himself performing all 101 acts.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • mookie9999
    mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    Stone believes that the English translation of "Mardi Gras" is "Sweaty Nipples".
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • mammasan
    mammasan Posts: 5,656
    Stone Gossard can crack walnuts open with his testicles.
    "When one gets in bed with government, one must expect the diseases it spreads." - Ron Paul
  • JordyWordy
    JordyWordy Posts: 2,261
    Eddie Better wrote:
    Stone Gossard can pick a stick up off the ground using his butt cheeks....

    Ha! one thats true!
  • 12345AGNST1
    12345AGNST1 Posts: 4,906
    Stone read every single one of these replies, all 100+ pages and concluded that reply number 63 as the best.
    5/28/06, 6/27/08, 10/28/09, 5/18/10, 5/21/10
    8/7/08, 6/9/09
  • Snake
    Snake Posts: 2,605
    Stone was bored so he decided to post on this thread and see if it keeps going
    Pirates had democracy too.

    "Its a secret to everybody."
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    To prove he is kicking rad, Stone took his grandmother to the grocery store on a Wednesday.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    It is prophesied that one day Stone will break his shackles, and rise from the darkened stage corner like the mighty phoenix leaving the ashes
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • failedpersephone
    failedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    Stone is too sexy for his shirt, too sexy for his shirt, too sexy...oh it HURTS.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.

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