PJ fans in 12 step Recovery

mickeyrat

njnancy said:

Hello to my friends in sobriety; no matter if you've just begun to form a thought,  or my fellow recovering alcoholics/addicts or those who visit to show solidarity....

23 years sober today, by the grace of my higher power. 

I've been struggling with PTSD lately but I'm determined to feel gratitude. I'm so thankful for this thread and for all of you......✌❤ ☕

keep on keeping on......

hedonist

Way to go, Nancy!

It's tough enough as it is, but add health / mental factors to the mix?

Be proud

deadendp

njnancy said:

Hello to my friends in sobriety; no matter if you've just begun to form a thought,  or my fellow recovering alcoholics/addicts or those who visit to show solidarity....

23 years sober today, by the grace of my higher power. 

I've been struggling with PTSD lately but I'm determined to feel gratitude. I'm so thankful for this thread and for all of you......✌❤ ☕

Hobbes

Awesome, Nancy! Proud of you. You are an inspiration.

SD48277

Congratulations, Nancy! That is an awesome achievement.

Wobbie

way to go, nancy!

Matts3221

Fucking amazing , go Nancy.

lastexitlondon

Total respect nancy. An inspiration

Fifthelement

Congratulations Nancy.  

hedonist

It's one of those evenings where a drink (a drink? - hah!) sounds so goddamn good.

This morning I was telling my husband how the acupuncturist I was seeing early last year said he could smell alcohol coming out of my pores when the needles went in.  Good god - that's a fuckload of booze.

I'm thankful I often have those sealed-the-deal moments that cement my resolve to never, ever go there again.

Wobbie

today makes 10 weeks booze free for me. that’s about 9.5 weeks longer than I’d gone in the past few decades.

actually, truth be told, there was one hiccup....I got drunk by myself one night.....at home, just me and the dogs....woke up with a shitty hangover the next day. I’m still gonna take credit for 10 weeks. the one screw up just reinforced what I’m trying to rid myself of.

mickeyrat

Wobbie said:

today makes 10 weeks booze free for me. that’s about 9.5 weeks longer than I’d gone in the past few decades.

actually, truth be told, there was one hiccup....I got drunk by myself one night.....at home, just me and the dogs....woke up with a shitty hangover the next day. I’m still gonna take credit for 10 weeks. the one screw up just reinforced what I’m trying to rid myself of.

then it wasn't a screw up , it was a necessary lesson to learn.

hear it often. someone in aa not far along in the steps drinks  again. gets filled with the guilt and shame etc.

My standard reply is did you learn you are in fact an alky? no question you are? if so then do not be concerned about doing what an alcoholic does, its our natural way of being, being sober is not natural to us .

if thats what it took to learn this incredibly valuable information about ourselves then so be it.

Wobbie

I felt some guilt but I was more pissed at myself.

F Me In The Brain

Anger is a gift, Wobbie.  Keep it up!

deadendp

Wobbie said:

I felt some guilt but I was more pissed at myself.

hedonist

Wobbie said:

I felt some guilt but I was more pissed at myself.

That's more valuable

njnancy

Hey guys.

Thank you so much for the wonderful comments & cyber hugs for my  anniversary.  Im a miracle because I have seen so many people succumb to this disease & people In the rooms & in my life gave up on me. I was a lost cause.

I just changed one day, I had surrendered to a higher power possibility.

WOBBIE- you are doing great. Relapse  is common. I got sober in March but drank on Nov 12 & cried the whole day. I changed my date to Nov 13. It's a personal choice, we each walk our own road. Proud of you.

I'll be going  now,  I'm still in a dark struggle, so when I beat this monster, I'll be my old self. Take care everyone. You are all special people. 🥰❤✌

Fifthelement

Hey @njnancy, you are in my thoughts.  I know you’ve been struggling.  Please feel free to DM me if you want to talk.  Please take care, and know that others are thinking of you and wishing you the best.

HughFreakingDillon

that's it. I've had it. 

mickeyrat

HughFreakingDillon said:

that's it. I've had it. 

explain?

HughFreakingDillon

mickeyrat said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

that's it. I've had it. 

explain?

done with booze. my weekly intake has exploded over the last couple months. no reason as to why. I don't drink because of depression or stress or anything. it's more out of habit and boredom. my wife and i used to party every weekend with friends or just ourselves, but then we had kids, she stopped, I didn't. well I did for a while when the kids were young. there was no time for that. but as the kids grew older I started to get bored and, as an introvert, don't go out with friends much. So my partying is confined to my own house. so my weekly ritual is having a few thursday, get blitzed friday and sometime saturdays. the main issues I have from it are:

-the amount of money that I spend on it
-the health factor. not just booze. but it inevitably leads to poor eating choices. bags of chips, fast food. just garbage. and my weight has ballooned out of control as a result. 
-my wife hates it. it has taken a toll on our marriage. 
-i don't want my kids growing up only knowing their dad getting loaded on weekends. my 13 year old has made the odd comment, and I don't like it. 
-sometimes if I'm hung over, I'm not enjoying the day. I am wishing it over with. I can't wait to just "get through". the odd weekends where I am not hung over have felt like another world. 

I just don't have an off switch. Never have. I just drink until it's gone, or I've gone way overboard. 

I spoke to my GP about this some time ago. When I told him how much I drank (usually a 26 of rye per weekend) he told me, "well, that's about average, you're just doing it in two sittings, where most people do it in 7". 

But this past weekend I blasted through a 40, a 26, a 2 litre of wine, and a few beers. that's NOT normal for me. So that's it. I can't have it getting any worse than that. 

I don't know how I'm alive after all that. 

I just want to go back to being a normal person that gets up at a normal hour on a saturday morning and doesn't have to "get through" the day. 

mickeyrat

HughFreakingDillon said:

mickeyrat said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

that's it. I've had it. 

explain?

done with booze. my weekly intake has exploded over the last couple months. no reason as to why. I don't drink because of depression or stress or anything. it's more out of habit and boredom. my wife and i used to party every weekend with friends or just ourselves, but then we had kids, she stopped, I didn't. well I did for a while when the kids were young. there was no time for that. but as the kids grew older I started to get bored and, as an introvert, don't go out with friends much. So my partying is confined to my own house. so my weekly ritual is having a few thursday, get blitzed friday and sometime saturdays. the main issues I have from it are:

-the amount of money that I spend on it
-the health factor. not just booze. but it inevitably leads to poor eating choices. bags of chips, fast food. just garbage. and my weight has ballooned out of control as a result. 
-my wife hates it. it has taken a toll on our marriage. 
-i don't want my kids growing up only knowing their dad getting loaded on weekends. my 13 year old has made the odd comment, and I don't like it. 
-sometimes if I'm hung over, I'm not enjoying the day. I am wishing it over with. I can't wait to just "get through". the odd weekends where I am not hung over have felt like another world. 

I just don't have an off switch. Never have. I just drink until it's gone, or I've gone way overboard. 

I spoke to my GP about this some time ago. When I told him how much I drank (usually a 26 of rye per weekend) he told me, "well, that's about average, you're just doing it in two sittings, where most people do it in 7". 

But this past weekend I blasted through a 40, a 26, a 2 litre of wine, and a few beers. that's NOT normal for me. So that's it. I can't have it getting any worse than that. 

I don't know how I'm alive after all that. 

I just want to go back to being a normal person that gets up at a normal hour on a saturday morning and doesn't have to "get through" the day. 

I kinda like your GP......

so, according to the AA book, you would classify as either a heavy drinker, able to stop or moderate with sufficient reason to do so. Or an alcoholic who is compelled to drink regardless of effort at stopping, one who may be able to stop or moderate for a time but generally returns to drinking for any or no reason at all.

I sincerely hope its the former for you. In either case, there is support to be had. Here of course and elsewhere as well from a variety of sources, AA being one of them if an alcoholic. 

whatever the course you take, the desired result is the same. To go to bed sober on a daily basis. One day at a time.

vogonpoetbythelake

Great dialogue really appreciate all of you and your honesty...thank you...be well!

HughFreakingDillon

mickeyrat said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

mickeyrat said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

that's it. I've had it. 

explain?

done with booze. my weekly intake has exploded over the last couple months. no reason as to why. I don't drink because of depression or stress or anything. it's more out of habit and boredom. my wife and i used to party every weekend with friends or just ourselves, but then we had kids, she stopped, I didn't. well I did for a while when the kids were young. there was no time for that. but as the kids grew older I started to get bored and, as an introvert, don't go out with friends much. So my partying is confined to my own house. so my weekly ritual is having a few thursday, get blitzed friday and sometime saturdays. the main issues I have from it are:

-the amount of money that I spend on it
-the health factor. not just booze. but it inevitably leads to poor eating choices. bags of chips, fast food. just garbage. and my weight has ballooned out of control as a result. 
-my wife hates it. it has taken a toll on our marriage. 
-i don't want my kids growing up only knowing their dad getting loaded on weekends. my 13 year old has made the odd comment, and I don't like it. 
-sometimes if I'm hung over, I'm not enjoying the day. I am wishing it over with. I can't wait to just "get through". the odd weekends where I am not hung over have felt like another world. 

I just don't have an off switch. Never have. I just drink until it's gone, or I've gone way overboard. 

I spoke to my GP about this some time ago. When I told him how much I drank (usually a 26 of rye per weekend) he told me, "well, that's about average, you're just doing it in two sittings, where most people do it in 7". 

But this past weekend I blasted through a 40, a 26, a 2 litre of wine, and a few beers. that's NOT normal for me. So that's it. I can't have it getting any worse than that. 

I don't know how I'm alive after all that. 

I just want to go back to being a normal person that gets up at a normal hour on a saturday morning and doesn't have to "get through" the day. 

I kinda like your GP......

so, according to the AA book, you would classify as either a heavy drinker, able to stop or moderate with sufficient reason to do so. Or an alcoholic who is compelled to drink regardless of effort at stopping, one who may be able to stop or moderate for a time but generally returns to drinking for any or no reason at all.

I sincerely hope its the former for you. In either case, there is support to be had. Here of course and elsewhere as well from a variety of sources, AA being one of them if an alcoholic. 

whatever the course you take, the desired result is the same. To go to bed sober on a daily basis. One day at a time.

pretty sure I'm the former. Ultimately I'd love to be able to have a glass of wine or a beer with dinner, which I often do without issue. it's just on the weekends where I "face no consequences" (like having to go to work the next day) where my switch becomes non-existent. If I have an early morning function with my kids or family or whatever on a saturday, I have no issue with not drinking. it's just when there's nothing to worry about that I do this. Which, these days, with my kids being a little older, is almost always the case. 

lastexitlondon

More  power to you.  Im still wishing from a far that i could  stop.
I hope you can do what you need.  And i believe you are not in too deep .

Wobbie

good luck, Hugh!

Thanksgiving may or may not be a challenge for me....it’s always been my favorite boozy holiday.

hedonist

Haha....every holiday was my favorite boozy holiday.  In fact, who needed the holidays for a reason to begin with?

Challenges, whether conquering them or even trying to, have served my liberation well.

...but not so much my liver-ation

mickeyrat

hedonist said:

Haha....every holiday was my favorite boozy holiday.  In fact, who needed the holidays for a reason to begin with?

Challenges, whether conquering them or even trying to, have served my liberation well.

...but not so much my liver-ation

any day that ended in Y was sufficient......

mickeyrat

Prayers please for my former wife Deanna and her husband Tim.  Deanna's mom Lecia passed this morning.

Fifthelement

mickeyrat said:

Prayers please for my former wife Deanna and her husband Tim.  Deanna's mom Lecia passed this morning.

My condolences to all who knew and loved Lecia.