PJ fans in 12 step Recovery

RKCNDY

mickeyrat wrote:

Available to answer any questions or just talk if you want.

I have a question mickey, a really good friend of Mr. RK has problems with the bottle. He used to be a 'happy drunk', and I don't know if he got to 'that point' or what happened, he started to become an angry drunk. His current GF said that he had to quit drinking or she would leave (the last GF did that, and I don't think he ever really got over it). He quit cold turkey, this is the second time.

He has never gone to AA, but last time I talked to his GF, she says she's worried because he keeps saying, "this isn't forever". She said that he has gone out to the bar to socialize with friends from work, and didn't drink, but he has not been out with really close friends to the bar-this part worries her the most.

We sort of have avoided going out to concerts or dinner with them because we are afraid of being a 'trigger' for him. We stopped by their place the other day, and they really keep pushing going out to dinner or something. We did go over to their place for Thanksgiving, but Mr. RK didn't drink. They are great people when they are sober, just when the both of them get drunk together, it's not pretty.

Should we continue to not drink when we go out with them? Or is it okay to have a beer or two? Got any tips or suggestions? thanks.

mickeyrat

RKCNDY wrote:

mickeyrat wrote:

Available to answer any questions or just talk if you want.

I have a question mickey, a really good friend of Mr. RK has problems with the bottle. He used to be a 'happy drunk', and I don't know if he got to 'that point' or what happened, he started to become an angry drunk. His current GF said that he had to quit drinking or she would leave (the last GF did that, and I don't think he ever really got over it). He quit cold turkey, this is the second time.

He has never gone to AA, but last time I talked to his GF, she says she's worried because he keeps saying, "this isn't forever". She said that he has gone out to the bar to socialize with friends from work, and didn't drink, but he has not been out with really close friends to the bar-this part worries her the most.

We sort of have avoided going out to concerts or dinner with them because we are afraid of being a 'trigger' for him. We stopped by their place the other day, and they really keep pushing going out to dinner or something. We did go over to their place for Thanksgiving, but Mr. RK didn't drink. They are great people when they are sober, just when the both of them get drunk together, it's not pretty.

Should we continue to not drink when we go out with them? Or is it okay to have a beer or two? Got any tips or suggestions? thanks.

The bolded part is a recipe for disaster, imo.
Well the question is are you and Mr RK drinking responsibly? Able to stop when you want to? Have a problem yourselves? No? Then make that decision based on your own wants or needs, not on whether it will affect them. Unless you guys are asses when you drink yourselves!!! . Sounds to me like this guy is just waiting to go on a raging bender.When he does, stay far far away. It wont be pretty. Without some sort of desire on his part to stay stopped and with help, in my view its only a matter of time before that happens.

Oh and no, this is his first time quitting. So far. he hasnt quit anything if he started again after the first first time!!!

My drinking was my own problem. No one elses.
Its funny , I was at my nieces wedding and reception a couple years ago. It wasnt until the reception that my brother thought to ask if I'd be ok with the cash bar. Given that I was there for a purpose other than to just hang with people who were drinking there was no issue for me.

RKCNDY

mickeyrat wrote:

RKCNDY wrote:

mickeyrat wrote:

Available to answer any questions or just talk if you want.

I have a question mickey, a really good friend of Mr. RK has problems with the bottle. He used to be a 'happy drunk', and I don't know if he got to 'that point' or what happened, he started to become an angry drunk. His current GF said that he had to quit drinking or she would leave (the last GF did that, and I don't think he ever really got over it). He quit cold turkey, this is the second time.

He has never gone to AA, but last time I talked to his GF, she says she's worried because he keeps saying, "this isn't forever". She said that he has gone out to the bar to socialize with friends from work, and didn't drink, but he has not been out with really close friends to the bar-this part worries her the most.

We sort of have avoided going out to concerts or dinner with them because we are afraid of being a 'trigger' for him. We stopped by their place the other day, and they really keep pushing going out to dinner or something. We did go over to their place for Thanksgiving, but Mr. RK didn't drink. They are great people when they are sober, just when the both of them get drunk together, it's not pretty.

Should we continue to not drink when we go out with them? Or is it okay to have a beer or two? Got any tips or suggestions? thanks.

The bolded part is a recipe for disaster, imo.
Well the question is are you and Mr RK drinking responsibly? Able to stop when you want to? Have a problem yourselves? No? Then make that decision based on your own wants or needs, not on whether it will affect them. Unless you guys are asses when you drink yourselves!!! . Sounds to me like this guy is just waiting to go on a raging bender.When he does, stay far far away. It wont be pretty. Without some sort of desire on his part to stay stopped and with help, in my view its only a matter of time before that happens.

Oh and no, this is his first time quitting. So far. he hasnt quit anything if he started again after the first first time!!!

My drinking was my own problem. No one elses.
Its funny , I was at my nieces wedding and reception a couple years ago. It wasnt until the reception that my brother thought to ask if I'd be ok with the cash bar. Given that I was there for a purpose other than to just hang with people who were drinking there was no issue for me.

thanks mickey. I really was afraid of the 'raging bender' part. :( She is okay when drunk, it's just when he gets to a certain point when he's drunk, and he knows how to push her buttons.

Mr. RK can have a few beers and be fine, I just have to drive home. *sigh* we will go out with them and see how it goes. He's a big boy, and we want to support him, but I will be prepared to run if he decides to have a drink.

donnaruhl

STAYSEA wrote:

Nothing As It Seems
Don�t feel like home, he�s a little out
And all these words elope, it�s nothing like your poem
Putting in, in putting in, don�t feel like methadone
A scratching voice, all alone, it�s nothing like your baritone
It�s nothing as it seems, the little that he needs, it�s home
The little that he sees is nothing, he concedes, it�s home

One uninvited chromosome, a blanket like the ozone
It�s nothing as it seems, all that he needs, it�s home
The little that he frees, is nothing, he believes

Saving up a sunny day, something maybe two-tone
Anything to call his own, a chip off the cornerstone
Who�s kidding, rainy day, a one-way ticket headstone
Occupations overthrown, a whisper through a megaphone

Love this Song. And Good for you.Watch the tylenol!

I haven't had a pain pill in over 8 years.

STAYSEA

donnaruhl wrote:

STAYSEA wrote:

Nothing As It Seems
Don�t feel like home, he�s a little out
And all these words elope, it�s nothing like your poem
Putting in, in putting in, don�t feel like methadone
A scratching voice, all alone, it�s nothing like your baritone
It�s nothing as it seems, the little that he needs, it�s home
The little that he sees is nothing, he concedes, it�s home

One uninvited chromosome, a blanket like the ozone
It�s nothing as it seems, all that he needs, it�s home
The little that he frees, is nothing, he believes

Saving up a sunny day, something maybe two-tone
Anything to call his own, a chip off the cornerstone
Who�s kidding, rainy day, a one-way ticket headstone
Occupations overthrown, a whisper through a megaphone

Love this Song. And Good for you.Watch the tylenol!

I haven't had a pain pill in over 8 years.

Ahh! someone gets it. Are you doing well, these days?

mickeyrat

Ok, so we leave in the a.m. for a conference/retreat up in Canada outside of Windsor. Nice enough place. Older Catholic Retreat house right on Lake Erie. Can see a couple islands way out.

Taking a rental. 7 years ago this would not have been possible. Life is good.

borisdisco

Still going strong.

STAYSEA

12 steps..
Step 1 : I admit I need the Advil.

I'm not sure it's a problem just yet...

I'm happy for you all!

STAYSEA

Putting in, in putting in, don't feel like methadone
A scratching voice, all alone, it's nothing like your baritone
It's nothing as it seems, the little that he needs, it's home
The little that he sees is nothing, he concedes, it's home

STAYSEA

If only you could see
The stranger next to me
You promise you promise that you're done
But I cant tell you from the drugs

Don't let go
We'll dig a great big hole
Down an endless hole
We'll both go

You're so blind!
You can't save me this time
Hope comes from inside
And I feel so low tonight

If only you could see
The stranger next to me
You promise you promise that you're done
But I can't tell you from the drugs

whispering hands

The song that gets me through shit times us Tool's
Armenia.... Learn to swim motherfuckers... As I fuck
up.. Agh such is a day in the life of me.. Two years GONE!!

whispering hands

So... I wi fuck up a second time and have a cigarette
Too.,, fuck it. HELP!

mickeyrat

7 years today.

Man where does the time go??

mydogmookieblaylock

mickeyrat wrote:

7 years today.

Man where does the time go??

good work man. great work

locked

No ones ever stayed sober longer than 24 hours..
Trust me..
Lots of folks with double digit sobriety picking up.

There's a guy I got sober with..
We nicknamed him St. George because he sponsored so many people,
Never could admit vulnerability or doubts cause he was sooo sober ...
Mr. AA , follow me ! I've got the answer..
See how much serenity I have?

Well Mr. Serenity didnt pick up but at age 47 he suffered a massive stroke
Which doctors told him was from stress..
He's paralyzed on his entire left side now.

I love the man dearly and am praying he makes a complete recovery but you gotta run an honest program.
That doesn't neccesarily mean just not picking up..
But don't pretend to be more than you are..
We are not saints and he almost died trying to pretend to be one.
I was one of the few people behind the scenes who knew he was a maniac and deeply troubled after
His "followers" left for the night..

It's an inside job today

STAYSEA

locked wrote:

No ones ever stayed sober longer than 24 hours..
Trust me..
Lots of folks with double digit sobriety picking up.

There's a guy I got sober with..
We nicknamed him St. George because he sponsored so many people,
Never could admit vulnerability or doubts cause he was sooo sober ...
Mr. AA , follow me ! I've got the answer..
See how much serenity I have?

Well Mr. Serenity didn't pick up but at age 47 he suffered a massive stroke
Which doctors told him was from stress..
He's paralyzed on his entire left side now.

I love the man dearly and am praying he makes a complete recovery but you gotta run an honest program.
That doesn't necessarily mean just not picking up..
But don't pretend to be more than you are..
We are not saints and he almost died trying to pretend to be one.
I was one of the few people behind the scenes who knew he was a maniac and deeply troubled after
His "followers" left for the night..

It's an inside job today

My Uncle is sober. He can't pretend. He gets violently sick if he wears after shave.
I'm not in a program but if you need to talk to some one and you haven't already been drinking tonight. Pm me.

Jason P

I'm thinking of quitting drinking. Waste of money, time, and health.

Wish me luck.

locked

Good luck!

If it doesn't work , we'll give you back twice your misery..
No questions asked!



Try a meeting?
Then try another one..
What have you got to lose brother?

mickeyrat

locked wrote:

Good luck!

If it doesn't work , we'll give you back twice your misery..
No questions asked!



Try a meeting?
Then try another one..
What have you got to lose brother?

PLUS INTEREST!!!!!!

mickeyrat

This is a bit early but June 10th 1935 an Akron Surgeon had a beer or two to steady his nerves as he had a procedure to preform that morning. The surgery went well, I understand the patient recovered. After this , the surgeon went around town offering amends for harms done while the surgeon was actively drinking alcoholically.

That date is now considered the founding of Alcoholics Anonymous and since has changed the lives of countless hopeless and helpless individuals worldwide. It is helping people in over 180 countries based on the principle that one alcoholic can help another alcoholic and both can stay sober one day at a time.


Thanks to those that came before and made this possible for me. I will do my part to ensure it continues.