Dating as A PJ Fan

lastexitlondon

Especially if find someone else with a foot/sock fetish in the area

tempo_n_groove

lastexitlondon said:

Especially if find someone else with a foot/sock fetish in the area

You stop it with that, lol.

HesCalledDyer

dankind said:

HesCalledDyer said:

I dated a girl last year for a few months who was into PJ.  That’s how I approached her, actually. She was wearing an Eddie Vedder t-shirt. She totally screwed me over and I went thru about a 2 month period where I didn’t even want to listen to the band. Made me sick to my stomach. Thus, I’ll never date a PJ fan ever again.

That said, I’m not too worried about what music they like or any of that (although country might be a deal breaker). I just seem to have a problem finding a woman who isn’t a cheating fucking whore. This modern “hook-up culture” has pretty much ruined dating for me. No one gives a flying fuck about exclusivity and faithfulness anymore. It’s all about sneaking around and “side pieces.”

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being someone's side piece.

Someone's got to scratch that itch; just don't get your ass shot off.

And it ain't nothing new. There's a rich history.

https://youtu.be/aVIA1n5ng4Y

There’s absolutely everything wrong with it. If you’re not happy with who you’re with, you should tell them and let them go so they can find someone who won’t treat them like shit. I don’t and won’t condone cheating.

I know it’s nothing new, but that still doesn’t make it acceptable behavior. It’s become the standard nowadays. If that’s the way people are gonna act, then dating isn’t for me.

RogueStoner

I used to date married guys when I was very young and naive. I did it on purpose because I didn't want a relationship. Being someone's "side piece" was much easier. All the fun and none of the crap. And I did consider the wife back then. If I thought the marriage had a chance in hell, I'd send the guy right back to his wife. Then I got older and realized how absurd I was. Who the hell was I to decide anything about someone's marriage? Just because I don't believe in monogamy doesn't mean others shouldn't have it. No more married guys. I've got enough women hating me without cause, I don't need any more. 

dankind

HesCalledDyer said:

dankind said:

HesCalledDyer said:

I dated a girl last year for a few months who was into PJ.  That’s how I approached her, actually. She was wearing an Eddie Vedder t-shirt. She totally screwed me over and I went thru about a 2 month period where I didn’t even want to listen to the band. Made me sick to my stomach. Thus, I’ll never date a PJ fan ever again.

That said, I’m not too worried about what music they like or any of that (although country might be a deal breaker). I just seem to have a problem finding a woman who isn’t a cheating fucking whore. This modern “hook-up culture” has pretty much ruined dating for me. No one gives a flying fuck about exclusivity and faithfulness anymore. It’s all about sneaking around and “side pieces.”

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being someone's side piece.

Someone's got to scratch that itch; just don't get your ass shot off.

And it ain't nothing new. There's a rich history.

https://youtu.be/aVIA1n5ng4Y

There’s absolutely everything wrong with it. If you’re not happy with who you’re with, you should tell them and let them go so they can find someone who won’t treat them like shit. I don’t and won’t condone cheating.

I know it’s nothing new, but that still doesn’t make it acceptable behavior. It’s become the standard nowadays. If that’s the way people are gonna act, then dating isn’t for me.

I agree with this personally. I have never cheated on a single SO, even in middle/high school. I’m just loyal to my core. And I think cheaters are morally bankrupt. But the side pieces? I don’t know. That seems more of a gray area. They are certainly complicit, but I feel like they get judged too harshly sometimes. 

RogueStoner

Having cheated and been cheated on, I think I have more insight now and understand the motives behind it. The woman always gets the blame, be it the mistress or the cheating gf. No one seems to look at why this happened, what each party got out of it. They just see the surface and blame the other woman. It's BS. Most affairs have nothing to do with what people think. 

RogueStoner

...and then there are the marriages where there is no cheating and it all still goes to shit. 

Thoughts_Arrive

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

As long as she's no shorter than 6 feet.

Wow. I understand liking tall women if you're very tall, but geez, that really limits your options. There aren't very many women who are taller than 6'.... unless you mean when they wear heels (hubba hubba btw - sounds like you're really really tall; that is very attractive to me - I like extremely tall men ... but I'm "only" 5'10" ).

I am 6' 2". Do you love No Code?

Lol, of course I do!

Let's get together. 

Move to Canada and I'll think about it.

Too cold for my liking. I don't handle cold weather too well.

And I can't stand hot weather... I don't think it was meant to be!

*weeps*

Thoughts_Arrive

I find people these days to be so shallow, self absorbed, selfish, narcissistic that I doubt I will ever find someone. 
I have never and will never try online dating or tinder. 
I am not a commodity. I am a human being.

Thoughts_Arrive

tempo_n_groove said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Speaking of love, my parents' friends turned up uninvited and the lady is like "have you got a girlfriend yet?" "not good, you're nearly 40" 
Gosh I hate immigrant south eastern Europeans. 
Now my mum is at me (indirectly via conversations with my dad) as her friend's son has a girlfriend and I don't and how it makes my parents look bad and how people will talk how shit my family situation is.
P.S. I'll say it again, I hate immigrant south eastern Europeans.

When I was 20 I said "no marriage, no kids".

I'm 42 now and I've stuck to my guns, lol.  Not to say that I might change my mind but I'm in no rush.

I don't think I want kids.
Can't picture myself as a father.
I have never been good with kids.
No patience. 
World is overpopulated anyways and it's not a world I want my child to live in.

darwinstheory

lastexitlondon said:

Especially if find someone else with a foot/sock fetish in the area

Sounds like we should probably just go ahead and start up a "What's your fetish?" thread. See who is open to admission and who sits back and lurks. 

PJ_Soul

dankind said:

HesCalledDyer said:

dankind said:

HesCalledDyer said:

I dated a girl last year for a few months who was into PJ.  That’s how I approached her, actually. She was wearing an Eddie Vedder t-shirt. She totally screwed me over and I went thru about a 2 month period where I didn’t even want to listen to the band. Made me sick to my stomach. Thus, I’ll never date a PJ fan ever again.

That said, I’m not too worried about what music they like or any of that (although country might be a deal breaker). I just seem to have a problem finding a woman who isn’t a cheating fucking whore. This modern “hook-up culture” has pretty much ruined dating for me. No one gives a flying fuck about exclusivity and faithfulness anymore. It’s all about sneaking around and “side pieces.”

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being someone's side piece.

Someone's got to scratch that itch; just don't get your ass shot off.

And it ain't nothing new. There's a rich history.

https://youtu.be/aVIA1n5ng4Y

There’s absolutely everything wrong with it. If you’re not happy with who you’re with, you should tell them and let them go so they can find someone who won’t treat them like shit. I don’t and won’t condone cheating.

I know it’s nothing new, but that still doesn’t make it acceptable behavior. It’s become the standard nowadays. If that’s the way people are gonna act, then dating isn’t for me.

I agree with this personally. I have never cheated on a single SO, even in middle/high school. I’m just loyal to my core. And I think cheaters are morally bankrupt. But the side pieces? I don’t know. That seems more of a gray area. They are certainly complicit, but I feel like they get judged too harshly sometimes. 

Same here. Cheating is just horrible. I would never do it, and I think people who do are pretty much total scumbags. As for the actual "side piece"... I would never be one. God knows I've had ample opportunity to be "the other woman", and I was extremely tempted more than once (love on my part has even been a factor, so it was really hard). But at the end of the day I knew I just couldn't play a part in doing something that disgusting to the guy's wife or S.O., no matter what kind of sob story the guy handed me to try and justify it. I've been cheated on, so I know how devastating that is. It doesn't matter if I know the cheatee or not.  I think it is plain old immoral to be a part of the cause of that kind of pain for someone, and to be an agent of such dishonesty. I don't feel like it's a gray area at all. 

Thoughts_Arrive

Having studied psychology this year, I learned that we habituate to our loved ones over time.
The passion and fire and euphoria of love dies eventually.
Are humans meant to live in monogamy for life?
Explains cheating I guess.

PJ_Soul

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Having studied psychology this year, I learned that we habituate to our loved ones over time.
The passion and fire and euphoria of love dies eventually.
Are humans meant to live in monogamy for life?
Explains cheating I guess.

Yes, if someone wants mindblowing sex and firy passion to be top of the priority list throughout a long term relationship, they'd be best advised to restrict their relationships to under 1 year. Of course, there are people who place a great many other things above that in their marriage - things that go deeper and that last forever (not that sex can't still be good then, but we all know it's not that hot fucking sex you get when a relationship is young). Marriage is certainly not for everyone. That is why this expectation in society for everyone to wed needs to go away.
I don't think that explains cheating though. It explains why some might want to sleep with or have flings with various people, but I don't think that desire justifies the betrayal and dishonesty that cheating embodies. I think that if a decent person is in a relationship and finds that they can't help but screw someone else, then they should break up with their S.O. and then go sleep with whoever they want. Don't do it behind a person's back and lie about it. It's such an awful thing to do. I can't believe people think they can actually claim to have a good marriage while they also cheat because "people aren't meant to be monogamous". That isn't actually possible. Either find someone who is into swinging, or stay single.

jnimhaoileoin

Agree, there is absolutely no excuse for cheating. If you don't love someone enough to stay faithful to them then you should leave them. People seem to think they can have their cake and eat it. I know some people stay together 'for the kids' but even that is questionable and ultimately I find it hard to believe that in this day and age (i.e. when women no longer rely on men for an income) that it could be the best thing for them

RogueStoner

I was cheated on before I ever cheated on my first husband and I guess at that point, he'd done it so many times that it didn't matter anymore. I've had many years to think about that and I keep coming to the conclusion that the sex isn't what hurt. It was the deception, the being caught and still lying and thus treating me like I'm stupid. I wasn't raised with good role models of marriage and my first one didn't go that well. So I get it. And I've also matured enough to respect marriage now and haven't behaved that way for a very long time. But I also don't judge those that do because I can relate. I can relate to a lot...probably way more than any one person should be able to. 

PJS, I'm sorry someone hurt and betrayed you in that way. Sincerely. 

hedonist

As someone whose parents divorced because of infidelity, I guess I do judge (as I do - must - with most issues and people, including myself), though this from a different perspective.

Interesting thread, and comments.  Maybe wasn't your intent, ratmando, but glad you got it going.

Thoughts_Arrive

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Having studied psychology this year, I learned that we habituate to our loved ones over time.
The passion and fire and euphoria of love dies eventually.
Are humans meant to live in monogamy for life?
Explains cheating I guess.

Yes, if someone wants mindblowing sex and firy passion to be top of the priority list throughout a long term relationship, they'd be best advised to restrict their relationships to under 1 year. Of course, there are people who place a great many other things above that in their marriage - things that go deeper and that last forever (not that sex can't still be good then, but we all know it's not that hot fucking sex you get when a relationship is young). Marriage is certainly not for everyone. That is why this expectation in society for everyone to wed needs to go away.
I don't think that explains cheating though. It explains why some might want to sleep with or have flings with various people, but I don't think that desire justifies the betrayal and dishonesty that cheating embodies. I think that if a decent person is in a relationship and finds that they can't help but screw someone else, then they should break up with their S.O. and then go sleep with whoever they want. Don't do it behind a person's back and lie about it. It's such an awful thing to do. I can't believe people think they can actually claim to have a good marriage while they also cheat because "people aren't meant to be monogamous". That isn't actually possible. Either find someone who is into swinging, or stay single.

Yeah it's not fair. Especially considering you can pass on a STD to your wife/husband

RogueStoner

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Having studied psychology this year, I learned that we habituate to our loved ones over time.
The passion and fire and euphoria of love dies eventually.
Are humans meant to live in monogamy for life?
Explains cheating I guess.

Yes, if someone wants mindblowing sex and firy passion to be top of the priority list throughout a long term relationship, they'd be best advised to restrict their relationships to under 1 year. Of course, there are people who place a great many other things above that in their marriage - things that go deeper and that last forever (not that sex can't still be good then, but we all know it's not that hot fucking sex you get when a relationship is young). Marriage is certainly not for everyone. That is why this expectation in society for everyone to wed needs to go away.
I don't think that explains cheating though. It explains why some might want to sleep with or have flings with various people, but I don't think that desire justifies the betrayal and dishonesty that cheating embodies. I think that if a decent person is in a relationship and finds that they can't help but screw someone else, then they should break up with their S.O. and then go sleep with whoever they want. Don't do it behind a person's back and lie about it. It's such an awful thing to do. I can't believe people think they can actually claim to have a good marriage while they also cheat because "people aren't meant to be monogamous". That isn't actually possible. Either find someone who is into swinging, or stay single.

Yeah it's not fair. Especially considering you can pass on a STD to your wife/husband

Ooooh, I agree with this point. That risk is never ok. 

mickeyrat

Hobbes said:

A hole in one does not always lead to one in the hole.

this CANNOT go unacknowledged......

I see what you did there.