A safe place for anxiety sufferers to share.

SD48277

May I make a suggestion? When your dad returns home, make "In case of Emergency" envelopes. Write down what medications he is on, what he is allergic to, the names of his doctors, if he has a DNR,  and contact info for you and your sisters. Put it in an envelope , and put it on the fridge. Make one up for your mother, too. Explain to your parents and your sisters that you are doing this in case an emergency happens and you are not home to help (whether you are in class or just unavailable at the time). This way your mom, or whoever, can call an ambulance, if necessary, or just have the info in hand to go to the hospital directly. This puts some control and responsibility back in your parents ' hands. Also mention that in times of Emergency, people don't always remember every detail, and this will be a back up. Hopefully this will ease some of the responsibility you feel for your dad's care.

Matts3221

SD48277 said:

May I make a suggestion? When your dad returns home, make "In case of Emergency" envelopes. Write down what medications he is on, what he is allergic to, the names of his doctors, if he has a DNR,  and contact info for you and your sisters. Put it in an envelope , and put it on the fridge. Make one up for your mother, too. Explain to your parents and your sisters that you are doing this in case an emergency happens and you are not home to help (whether you are in class or just unavailable at the time). This way your mom, or whoever, can call an ambulance, if necessary, or just have the info in hand to go to the hospital directly. This puts some control and responsibility back in your parents ' hands. Also mention that in times of Emergency, people don't always remember every detail, and this will be a back up. Hopefully this will ease some of the responsibility you feel for your dad's care.

Really good idea.

Fifthelement

SD48277 said:

May I make a suggestion? When your dad returns home, make "In case of Emergency" envelopes. Write down what medications he is on, what he is allergic to, the names of his doctors, if he has a DNR,  and contact info for you and your sisters. Put it in an envelope , and put it on the fridge. Make one up for your mother, too. Explain to your parents and your sisters that you are doing this in case an emergency happens and you are not home to help (whether you are in class or just unavailable at the time). This way your mom, or whoever, can call an ambulance, if necessary, or just have the info in hand to go to the hospital directly. This puts some control and responsibility back in your parents ' hands. Also mention that in times of Emergency, people don't always remember every detail, and this will be a back up. Hopefully this will ease some of the responsibility you feel for your dad's care.

That is excellent advice for everyone.  My mom has a duo-tang that she keeps on top of the fridge with all of her and my dads medical information.  My dad has so many health issues and is in so many meds that it gets exhausting trying to remember things.  A copy goes with him on every trip to the hospital. 

Thoughts_Arrive

SD48277 said:

May I make a suggestion? When your dad returns home, make "In case of Emergency" envelopes. Write down what medications he is on, what he is allergic to, the names of his doctors, if he has a DNR,  and contact info for you and your sisters. Put it in an envelope , and put it on the fridge. Make one up for your mother, too. Explain to your parents and your sisters that you are doing this in case an emergency happens and you are not home to help (whether you are in class or just unavailable at the time). This way your mom, or whoever, can call an ambulance, if necessary, or just have the info in hand to go to the hospital directly. This puts some control and responsibility back in your parents ' hands. Also mention that in times of Emergency, people don't always remember every detail, and this will be a back up. Hopefully this will ease some of the responsibility you feel for your dad's care.

Thank you. That is a good suggestion.
He returned home yesterday afternoon.

Thoughts_Arrive

I called the lady and she was totally fine with me deciding not to move in and thinks I am making the right decision as university is very important this year. I've helped her by suggesting where she can advertise her room on Facebook. She said she has an 18 year old girl express interest in the room. I am dreading my best friend's reaction. I hope he understands and does not get mad at me or cut off our friendship.

SD48277

That is good news about your dad. Hopefully he is resting and feeling better.

With regards to your friend:
* you are not accountable to him (unless you two have an agreement about that); you are ultimately accountable to yourself.
* before you speak/text/message with him, set up some appointments to look at other house/flat shares. When you next communicate with him you can say something along the line of, "I didn't take that flat share because the situation seemed wonky, but I have xx appointments set up. I also have been sorting through and getting rid of some of my stuff so WHEN I move, it will be easier." And then do it. My guess is that the frustration he feels is because of a lack of action on your part. I understand that it is overwhelming . Just break it down into smaller steps.

Thoughts_Arrive

Thanks.

It's going to be hard to have time for moving until December the earliest. I simply won't have time to search for places to live and meet potential housemates. I wanted to do the move before university starts which is tomorrow. I need to be home to help out because my dad is recovering. At least I put my townhouse up for sale. The advertising finally launched on Friday night.

hedonist

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Thanks.

It's going to be hard to have time for moving until December the earliest. I simply won't have time to search for places to live and meet potential housemates. I wanted to do the move before university starts which is tomorrow. I need to be home to help out because my dad is recovering. At least I put my townhouse up for sale. The advertising finally launched on Friday night.

That's great news!

Thoughts_Arrive

Yeah it'll be a relief once sold.

Thoughts_Arrive

Too many unfriendly snobs in this world. Especially at university. This girl that used to talk to me is now blatantly snobing me. Like choosing to use another pedestrian crossing to avoid me. I said hi as I got to the same crossing as she was at on our way to the tram stop after our lecture and she said I've gotta go this way sorry bye. Wtf was that. Made me feel like shit. And we we're going to the same tram stop anyways as both crossings take you there. Even during orientation last week she'd not say hi to me in the elevator or in the same room. I honestly don't know wtf I have done wrong. Baffled. I feel like asking her.

I keep telling myself who gives a shit, she's nothing in my life but I still feel hurt.

Thoughts_Arrive

I must be seen as some scary monster to women. Like intimidating or something

Thoughts_Arrive

Like, WTF?!

Why am I so unlikable?

I'm always polite and nice to everyone.

Thoughts_Arrive

Maybe they think I'm weird

lastexitlondon

How old are these  women you think are finding  you scary.  Again mate you are fixating on what you think  they think. Move on

hedonist

Maybe it’s not about you. Other things on one’s mind, problems, just not feeling sociable, who knows....again, very likely it’s totally separate from you. 

Why stress so much over someone you said a few posts up means nothing to you? I understand your curiosity but it seems like you’re putting more stock into this than is warranted

Try to put that energy toward something productive!

lastexitlondon

And remember  women change attitude during  a month if you get me. Ive always lived with  a woman since i was 15 and they have a very different attitude change during  a cycle . And i can never fully work it out. You know hedo is right. When someone has personal problems they may be walking around in a haze or pre occupied. You  may have been acting  this way at times with whats been in your  life . You never know what someone is going through

Thoughts_Arrive

And this other girl I've made an effort to talk to walks past me avoiding eye contact in the cafeteria and on the way to the train station.

Thoughts_Arrive

I feel so angry right now

Thoughts_Arrive

All I do is ask how they're going, talk about university. I'm not being sleazy or trying to pick them up. So wtf is wrong

Thoughts_Arrive

Kind of weird people treat others like dirt especially when they are studying to become psychologists.