A girl told me I creep her out

mickeyrat

you can stop projecting,supposing or just plain guessing at other peoples motives. you dont seem to have a good track record in that area.
besides it seems like its a primary weapon you use against yourself.

Thoughts_Arrive

This article shows that girls can be weird at times....

http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/celebrity/i-wouldnt-marry-you-if-you-were-the-last-person-on-earth-waleed-alys-wife-susan-carland-initially-rejected-the-project-host-20160510-goqfu2.html

Thoughts_Arrive

Malroth said:

Embrace the creep.

Unless your Jared Fogle,( or have tendencies in that spectrum), it just means your different.
It means your unique. It means you may look like Steve Buschemi.

I didn't know who Jared was, had to Google him.

hedonist

Thoughts_Arrive said:

This article shows that girls can be weird at times....

http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/celebrity/i-wouldnt-marry-you-if-you-were-the-last-person-on-earth-waleed-alys-wife-susan-carland-initially-rejected-the-project-host-20160510-goqfu2.html

And guys can't be?

mickeyrat had good advice right above your post; in fact, there's been much valuable insight. Whether you choose to consider any of it is in your hands.

Good luck.

Thoughts_Arrive

hedonist said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

This article shows that girls can be weird at times....

http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/celebrity/i-wouldnt-marry-you-if-you-were-the-last-person-on-earth-waleed-alys-wife-susan-carland-initially-rejected-the-project-host-20160510-goqfu2.html

And guys can't be?

mickeyrat had good advice right above your post; in fact, there's been much valuable insight. Whether you choose to consider any of it is in your hands.

Good luck.

Yes guys can be, me for example.
Thank you.

dankind

Thoughts_Arrive said:

She sat away from her usual seat in today's lecture and left the lecture early which she has never done before. Probably to avoid me walking to the train station afterwards. I feel like I am making her flee from me and it's making me feel uneasy.
I have two classes with her tomorrow one which I need to sit at a table with her to work together on our assignment.
I wish trouble would leave me alone.

Sounds to me like trouble is leaving you alone.

pjhawks

Thoughts_Arrive said:

She sat away from her usual seat in today's lecture and left the lecture early which she has never done before. Probably to avoid me walking to the train station afterwards. I feel like I am making her flee from me and it's making me feel uneasy.
I have two classes with her tomorrow one which I need to sit at a table with her to work together on our assignment.
I wish trouble would leave me alone.

or she had somewhere to go or maybe just had to pee. a very high chance it had nothing to do with you. i doubt this girl is sitting around thinking of ways to avoid you. your mind is playing tricks on you. you need to stop focusing on this girl and think of something else.

deadendp

Baseball.

Amongst the Ani

deadendp said:

Baseball.

Not American. More like Cricket

Thoughts_Arrive

Amongst the Ani said:

deadendp said:

Baseball.

Not American. More like Cricket

Yes. But it is a summer sport.

2-feign-reluctance

ehbacon said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Hey guys,
I don't know who else to talk to and am quite emotional (in tears) at the moment.
This girl in my lectures and classes who I sit next to at university sent me a blunt message on facebook this morning saying that I creep her out. I admit I like her and asked her out, she said she's working and I asked next time and she said yeah. That was over a month ago and I haven't asked her out again as I wasn't sure. Last night I sent her youtube link of a video of her town.
I woke up this morning and found the following message on my phone which left me shocked and feeling cold.

"So I don't know if you think it's funny or cool but it's actually starting to really creep me out that your looking up where I live and send me links. I can't stop you from looking at what's in my town if you really are interested but could you please stop sending me links I know what my town looks like I've lived here for 18 years

Thank you"

I replied to that message apologising and saying I won't send any more links.

We always clown around and tease each other in classes so I was joking around with her town. I thought she'd laugh about it, find it funny.
Her reaction is so against how she's replied to me in person before during class.
She's lives far away from me on the opposite side of town and I've never been to her town so was curious to see what it looks like.

I don't see myself as a creep and didn't realise I was creeping her out. I feel so embarrassed and disgusted at myself now.
I'll avoid her in uni, not sit next to her to give her space but I feel so terrible that I am thought of as a creep.
Sucks we need to do a group assignment together and meet at uni every week to work on it, I don't know how to go about it.
Do I just do my part and email to the group.

Ask your professor to be moved to a different group and steer clear of her. Not sure if Australia has any Title IX equivalent over there, but if you do, you are putting yourself at risk with continued contact. Don't let one person try to define you - clearly it's both her 'circus' and her 'monkeys'.

Title IX? Isn't that the equal pay act? and prohibits gender discrimination? I don't understand the connection?

http://knowyourix.org/title-ix/title-ix-the-basics/

Read up kids. If you're in college you need to be aware of this. At the college I work at I deal with these exact situations all the time from a counseling perspective, but the referrals are ALWAYS sent from the conduct office because someone reported someone else won't 'leave them alone'. She sounds unpredictable, which means there's some chance that she could walk into your uni's conduct office and say anything she wants about what she 'thinks' you are doing. Am I going to the extreme? You betcha I am. I deal with these situations all of the time. Especially with young men who don't know how to handle these kinds of situations.

Thoughts_Arrive

2-feign-reluctance said:

ehbacon said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Hey guys,
I don't know who else to talk to and am quite emotional (in tears) at the moment.
This girl in my lectures and classes who I sit next to at university sent me a blunt message on facebook this morning saying that I creep her out. I admit I like her and asked her out, she said she's working and I asked next time and she said yeah. That was over a month ago and I haven't asked her out again as I wasn't sure. Last night I sent her youtube link of a video of her town.
I woke up this morning and found the following message on my phone which left me shocked and feeling cold.

"So I don't know if you think it's funny or cool but it's actually starting to really creep me out that your looking up where I live and send me links. I can't stop you from looking at what's in my town if you really are interested but could you please stop sending me links I know what my town looks like I've lived here for 18 years

Thank you"

I replied to that message apologising and saying I won't send any more links.

We always clown around and tease each other in classes so I was joking around with her town. I thought she'd laugh about it, find it funny.
Her reaction is so against how she's replied to me in person before during class.
She's lives far away from me on the opposite side of town and I've never been to her town so was curious to see what it looks like.

I don't see myself as a creep and didn't realise I was creeping her out. I feel so embarrassed and disgusted at myself now.
I'll avoid her in uni, not sit next to her to give her space but I feel so terrible that I am thought of as a creep.
Sucks we need to do a group assignment together and meet at uni every week to work on it, I don't know how to go about it.
Do I just do my part and email to the group.

Ask your professor to be moved to a different group and steer clear of her. Not sure if Australia has any Title IX equivalent over there, but if you do, you are putting yourself at risk with continued contact. Don't let one person try to define you - clearly it's both her 'circus' and her 'monkeys'.

Title IX? Isn't that the equal pay act? and prohibits gender discrimination? I don't understand the connection?

http://knowyourix.org/title-ix/title-ix-the-basics/

Read up kids. If you're in college you need to be aware of this. At the college I work at I deal with these exact situations all the time from a counseling perspective, but the referrals are ALWAYS sent from the conduct office because someone reported someone else won't 'leave them alone'. She sounds unpredictable, which means there's some chance that she could walk into your uni's conduct office and say anything she wants about what she 'thinks' you are doing. Am I going to the extreme? You betcha I am. I deal with these situations all of the time. Especially with young men who don't know how to handle these kinds of situations.

I don't think we have something like that here. But our uni has policies against harassment.
Well, I am not sitting next to her so what's she got to say.
I just read my uni's policies on harassment, I can't say I have done anything against them.

2-feign-reluctance

Thoughts_Arrive said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

ehbacon said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Hey guys,
I don't know who else to talk to and am quite emotional (in tears) at the moment.
This girl in my lectures and classes who I sit next to at university sent me a blunt message on facebook this morning saying that I creep her out. I admit I like her and asked her out, she said she's working and I asked next time and she said yeah. That was over a month ago and I haven't asked her out again as I wasn't sure. Last night I sent her youtube link of a video of her town.
I woke up this morning and found the following message on my phone which left me shocked and feeling cold.

"So I don't know if you think it's funny or cool but it's actually starting to really creep me out that your looking up where I live and send me links. I can't stop you from looking at what's in my town if you really are interested but could you please stop sending me links I know what my town looks like I've lived here for 18 years

Thank you"

I replied to that message apologising and saying I won't send any more links.

We always clown around and tease each other in classes so I was joking around with her town. I thought she'd laugh about it, find it funny.
Her reaction is so against how she's replied to me in person before during class.
She's lives far away from me on the opposite side of town and I've never been to her town so was curious to see what it looks like.

I don't see myself as a creep and didn't realise I was creeping her out. I feel so embarrassed and disgusted at myself now.
I'll avoid her in uni, not sit next to her to give her space but I feel so terrible that I am thought of as a creep.
Sucks we need to do a group assignment together and meet at uni every week to work on it, I don't know how to go about it.
Do I just do my part and email to the group.

Ask your professor to be moved to a different group and steer clear of her. Not sure if Australia has any Title IX equivalent over there, but if you do, you are putting yourself at risk with continued contact. Don't let one person try to define you - clearly it's both her 'circus' and her 'monkeys'.

Title IX? Isn't that the equal pay act? and prohibits gender discrimination? I don't understand the connection?

http://knowyourix.org/title-ix/title-ix-the-basics/

Read up kids. If you're in college you need to be aware of this. At the college I work at I deal with these exact situations all the time from a counseling perspective, but the referrals are ALWAYS sent from the conduct office because someone reported someone else won't 'leave them alone'. She sounds unpredictable, which means there's some chance that she could walk into your uni's conduct office and say anything she wants about what she 'thinks' you are doing. Am I going to the extreme? You betcha I am. I deal with these situations all of the time. Especially with young men who don't know how to handle these kinds of situations.

I don't think we have something like that here. But our uni has policies against harassment.
Well, I am not sitting next to her so what's she got to say.
I just read my uni's policies on harassment, I can't say I have done anything against them.

Again, I'm just talking plainly with you, I would drop all communication with her. All of it. And I would ask your professor to move you to another group. This happens all the time at the college I work at. It's not a big deal to ask for support and you'd take a shit load off stress off your plate by doing so. You may not be able to control when and where you'll see her on campus, but you sure as hell can control your own actions. 100% of the guys I've worked with in this nearly exact kind of situation all say it's difficult at first, lots of anxiety, lots of difficult emotions period, but once they get in the habit of zero interaction, it does get easier.

Thoughts_Arrive

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

ehbacon said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Hey guys,
I don't know who else to talk to and am quite emotional (in tears) at the moment.
This girl in my lectures and classes who I sit next to at university sent me a blunt message on facebook this morning saying that I creep her out. I admit I like her and asked her out, she said she's working and I asked next time and she said yeah. That was over a month ago and I haven't asked her out again as I wasn't sure. Last night I sent her youtube link of a video of her town.
I woke up this morning and found the following message on my phone which left me shocked and feeling cold.

"So I don't know if you think it's funny or cool but it's actually starting to really creep me out that your looking up where I live and send me links. I can't stop you from looking at what's in my town if you really are interested but could you please stop sending me links I know what my town looks like I've lived here for 18 years

Thank you"

I replied to that message apologising and saying I won't send any more links.

We always clown around and tease each other in classes so I was joking around with her town. I thought she'd laugh about it, find it funny.
Her reaction is so against how she's replied to me in person before during class.
She's lives far away from me on the opposite side of town and I've never been to her town so was curious to see what it looks like.

I don't see myself as a creep and didn't realise I was creeping her out. I feel so embarrassed and disgusted at myself now.
I'll avoid her in uni, not sit next to her to give her space but I feel so terrible that I am thought of as a creep.
Sucks we need to do a group assignment together and meet at uni every week to work on it, I don't know how to go about it.
Do I just do my part and email to the group.

Ask your professor to be moved to a different group and steer clear of her. Not sure if Australia has any Title IX equivalent over there, but if you do, you are putting yourself at risk with continued contact. Don't let one person try to define you - clearly it's both her 'circus' and her 'monkeys'.

Title IX? Isn't that the equal pay act? and prohibits gender discrimination? I don't understand the connection?

http://knowyourix.org/title-ix/title-ix-the-basics/

Read up kids. If you're in college you need to be aware of this. At the college I work at I deal with these exact situations all the time from a counseling perspective, but the referrals are ALWAYS sent from the conduct office because someone reported someone else won't 'leave them alone'. She sounds unpredictable, which means there's some chance that she could walk into your uni's conduct office and say anything she wants about what she 'thinks' you are doing. Am I going to the extreme? You betcha I am. I deal with these situations all of the time. Especially with young men who don't know how to handle these kinds of situations.

I don't think we have something like that here. But our uni has policies against harassment.
Well, I am not sitting next to her so what's she got to say.
I just read my uni's policies on harassment, I can't say I have done anything against them.

Again, I'm just talking plainly with you, I would drop all communication with her. All of it. And I would ask your professor to move you to another group. This happens all the time at the college I work at. It's not a big deal to ask for support and you'd take a shit load off stress off your plate by doing so. You may not be able to control when and where you'll see her on campus, but you sure as hell can control your own actions. 100% of the guys I've worked with in this nearly exact kind of situation all say it's difficult at first, lots of anxiety, lots of difficult emotions period, but once they get in the habit of zero interaction, it does get easier.

I have stopped talking unless it is to do with our assignment which also involves the other person in the message or email. I have unfollowed her on facebook and set her as a restricted acquaintance on mine. I have one more week of classes to go so there is no point moving classes.

2-feign-reluctance

Thoughts_Arrive said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

ehbacon said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Hey guys,
I don't know who else to talk to and am quite emotional (in tears) at the moment.
This girl in my lectures and classes who I sit next to at university sent me a blunt message on facebook this morning saying that I creep her out. I admit I like her and asked her out, she said she's working and I asked next time and she said yeah. That was over a month ago and I haven't asked her out again as I wasn't sure. Last night I sent her youtube link of a video of her town.
I woke up this morning and found the following message on my phone which left me shocked and feeling cold.

"So I don't know if you think it's funny or cool but it's actually starting to really creep me out that your looking up where I live and send me links. I can't stop you from looking at what's in my town if you really are interested but could you please stop sending me links I know what my town looks like I've lived here for 18 years

Thank you"

I replied to that message apologising and saying I won't send any more links.

We always clown around and tease each other in classes so I was joking around with her town. I thought she'd laugh about it, find it funny.
Her reaction is so against how she's replied to me in person before during class.
She's lives far away from me on the opposite side of town and I've never been to her town so was curious to see what it looks like.

I don't see myself as a creep and didn't realise I was creeping her out. I feel so embarrassed and disgusted at myself now.
I'll avoid her in uni, not sit next to her to give her space but I feel so terrible that I am thought of as a creep.
Sucks we need to do a group assignment together and meet at uni every week to work on it, I don't know how to go about it.
Do I just do my part and email to the group.

Ask your professor to be moved to a different group and steer clear of her. Not sure if Australia has any Title IX equivalent over there, but if you do, you are putting yourself at risk with continued contact. Don't let one person try to define you - clearly it's both her 'circus' and her 'monkeys'.

Title IX? Isn't that the equal pay act? and prohibits gender discrimination? I don't understand the connection?

http://knowyourix.org/title-ix/title-ix-the-basics/

Read up kids. If you're in college you need to be aware of this. At the college I work at I deal with these exact situations all the time from a counseling perspective, but the referrals are ALWAYS sent from the conduct office because someone reported someone else won't 'leave them alone'. She sounds unpredictable, which means there's some chance that she could walk into your uni's conduct office and say anything she wants about what she 'thinks' you are doing. Am I going to the extreme? You betcha I am. I deal with these situations all of the time. Especially with young men who don't know how to handle these kinds of situations.

I don't think we have something like that here. But our uni has policies against harassment.
Well, I am not sitting next to her so what's she got to say.
I just read my uni's policies on harassment, I can't say I have done anything against them.

Again, I'm just talking plainly with you, I would drop all communication with her. All of it. And I would ask your professor to move you to another group. This happens all the time at the college I work at. It's not a big deal to ask for support and you'd take a shit load off stress off your plate by doing so. You may not be able to control when and where you'll see her on campus, but you sure as hell can control your own actions. 100% of the guys I've worked with in this nearly exact kind of situation all say it's difficult at first, lots of anxiety, lots of difficult emotions period, but once they get in the habit of zero interaction, it does get easier.

I have stopped talking unless it is to do with our assignment which also involves the other person in the message or email. I have unfollowed her on facebook and set her as a restricted acquaintance on mine. I have one more week of classes to go so there is no point moving classes.

All the best man. Keep channeling the nasty stuff through your music. Give it some place to go that's healthy and good and take good care of every part of your health. You're worth it - even if you can't see it when you feel like shit.

mickeyrat

I recommend a month or two of Lateralus by Tool on repeat as loud as you can reasonably stand it.

yes I am serious.

you're welcome

Thoughts_Arrive

mickeyrat said:

I recommend a month or two of Lateralus by Tool on repeat as loud as you can reasonably stand it.

yes I am serious.

you're welcome

I haven't listened to Tool in ages and was stuck for ideas on my ipod for the train journey to uni. Thanks. Will listen tomorrow.

Thoughts_Arrive

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

ehbacon said:

2-feign-reluctance said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Hey guys,
I don't know who else to talk to and am quite emotional (in tears) at the moment.
This girl in my lectures and classes who I sit next to at university sent me a blunt message on facebook this morning saying that I creep her out. I admit I like her and asked her out, she said she's working and I asked next time and she said yeah. That was over a month ago and I haven't asked her out again as I wasn't sure. Last night I sent her youtube link of a video of her town.
I woke up this morning and found the following message on my phone which left me shocked and feeling cold.

"So I don't know if you think it's funny or cool but it's actually starting to really creep me out that your looking up where I live and send me links. I can't stop you from looking at what's in my town if you really are interested but could you please stop sending me links I know what my town looks like I've lived here for 18 years

Thank you"

I replied to that message apologising and saying I won't send any more links.

We always clown around and tease each other in classes so I was joking around with her town. I thought she'd laugh about it, find it funny.
Her reaction is so against how she's replied to me in person before during class.
She's lives far away from me on the opposite side of town and I've never been to her town so was curious to see what it looks like.

I don't see myself as a creep and didn't realise I was creeping her out. I feel so embarrassed and disgusted at myself now.
I'll avoid her in uni, not sit next to her to give her space but I feel so terrible that I am thought of as a creep.
Sucks we need to do a group assignment together and meet at uni every week to work on it, I don't know how to go about it.
Do I just do my part and email to the group.

Ask your professor to be moved to a different group and steer clear of her. Not sure if Australia has any Title IX equivalent over there, but if you do, you are putting yourself at risk with continued contact. Don't let one person try to define you - clearly it's both her 'circus' and her 'monkeys'.

Title IX? Isn't that the equal pay act? and prohibits gender discrimination? I don't understand the connection?

http://knowyourix.org/title-ix/title-ix-the-basics/

Read up kids. If you're in college you need to be aware of this. At the college I work at I deal with these exact situations all the time from a counseling perspective, but the referrals are ALWAYS sent from the conduct office because someone reported someone else won't 'leave them alone'. She sounds unpredictable, which means there's some chance that she could walk into your uni's conduct office and say anything she wants about what she 'thinks' you are doing. Am I going to the extreme? You betcha I am. I deal with these situations all of the time. Especially with young men who don't know how to handle these kinds of situations.

I don't think we have something like that here. But our uni has policies against harassment.
Well, I am not sitting next to her so what's she got to say.
I just read my uni's policies on harassment, I can't say I have done anything against them.

Again, I'm just talking plainly with you, I would drop all communication with her. All of it. And I would ask your professor to move you to another group. This happens all the time at the college I work at. It's not a big deal to ask for support and you'd take a shit load off stress off your plate by doing so. You may not be able to control when and where you'll see her on campus, but you sure as hell can control your own actions. 100% of the guys I've worked with in this nearly exact kind of situation all say it's difficult at first, lots of anxiety, lots of difficult emotions period, but once they get in the habit of zero interaction, it does get easier.

I have stopped talking unless it is to do with our assignment which also involves the other person in the message or email. I have unfollowed her on facebook and set her as a restricted acquaintance on mine. I have one more week of classes to go so there is no point moving classes.

All the best man. Keep channeling the nasty stuff through your music. Give it some place to go that's healthy and good and take good care of every part of your health. You're worth it - even if you can't see it when you feel like shit.

Just anxious now reading your ix post. I hope nothing like that happens to me. Especially when I didn't mean anything by what she freaked out over. Thanks for the advice

mickeyrat

Thoughts_Arrive said:

mickeyrat said:

I recommend a month or two of Lateralus by Tool on repeat as loud as you can reasonably stand it.

yes I am serious.

you're welcome

I haven't listened to Tool in ages and was stuck for ideas on my ipod for the train journey to uni. Thanks. Will listen tomorrow.

to the exclusion of everything else.

HesCalledDyer

Thoughts_Arrive said:

mickeyrat said:

I recommend a month or two of Lateralus by Tool on repeat as loud as you can reasonably stand it.

yes I am serious.

you're welcome

I haven't listened to Tool in ages and was stuck for ideas on my ipod for the train journey to uni. Thanks. Will listen tomorrow.

I fully support this because it's what I listened to a month ago for 2 weeks straight!