Child-free Women

catefrances

Loulou wrote:

People that say kids suck must be talking about other peoples children sucking. It's completely different when you have your own.

no.. at times my kids suck... or should I say there are situations involving them that suck? but by no means does that mean I don't love them with a passion.

moretonbayfig

Not selfish at all! As women, it sometimes seems like it doesn't matter what we choose to do or not do - we'll be 'wrong' in someone's opinion. Step off our 'pink bits' society!

hedonist

moretonbayfig wrote:

Not selfish at all! As women, it sometimes seems like it doesn't matter what we choose to do or not do - we'll be 'wrong' in someone's opinion. Step off our 'pink bits' society!

Pink bits aside (I can't say that term without cringing!), that goes for pretty much anything, man or woman.

(which is why unless I genuinely respect someone, their opinion will have little, if any, effect on my life; living true to myself is all that matters)

BinauralJam

People with children should pay more taxes, not get brakes, your child contributes nothing, just takes takes takes, you love em so much, pay for em! lets put a price tag on your love. :twisted:

BinFrog

BinauralJam wrote:

People with children should pay more taxes, not get brakes, your child contributes nothing, just takes takes takes, you love em so much, pay for em! lets put a price tag on your love. :twisted:

They'll be paying for your social security. Pipe down.

PureandEasy

Mamasan23 wrote:

I couldn't agree more with everything you said here!! Thanks for that link, I'm definitely gonna check it out. And yes, not having kids doesn't mean we 'have it all'. People have also gone so far as to question my finances - I don't have kids, I must be rich, right? :fp: :fp: :fp:

there's no such thing as a rich Pearl Jam fan.

BinauralJam

BinFrog wrote:

BinauralJam wrote:

People with children should pay more taxes, not get brakes, your child contributes nothing, just takes takes takes, you love em so much, pay for em! lets put a price tag on your love. :twisted:

They'll be paying for your social security. Pipe down.

That's where the extra taxes could go! You won't see couples with 6 or 7 kids walking around anymore unless it's Brad and Angelina. The number of kids you have would become your new status symbol. 5 Grand a pop, every year until their 18. You love your child? Show Me the Money!

hedonist

PureandEasy wrote:

Mamasan23 wrote:

I couldn't agree more with everything you said here!! Thanks for that link, I'm definitely gonna check it out. And yes, not having kids doesn't mean we 'have it all'. People have also gone so far as to question my finances - I don't have kids, I must be rich, right? :fp: :fp: :fp:

there's no such thing as a rich Pearl Jam fan.

Oh yes there is! Wealth isn't measured by wallet-size

Black Diamond

PureandEasy wrote:

Mamasan23 wrote:

I couldn't agree more with everything you said here!! Thanks for that link, I'm definitely gonna check it out. And yes, not having kids doesn't mean we 'have it all'. People have also gone so far as to question my finances - I don't have kids, I must be rich, right? :fp: :fp: :fp:

there's no such thing as a rich Pearl Jam fan.

:shifty:

RKCNDY

BinFrog wrote:

BinauralJam wrote:

People with children should pay more taxes, not get brakes, your child contributes nothing, just takes takes takes, you love em so much, pay for em! lets put a price tag on your love. :twisted:

They'll be paying for your social security. Pipe down.

what social security? It's already been stated that today's Gen X'ers won't have anything to collect...too many baby boomers living too long.

Ms. Haiku

I wanted to be a mom since I was six.

I never thought I had the opportunities available for a child, and then with new medical issues my ability to give birth is a non issue now. No can do.

However, if I find Mr. Right, and he has kids, I wouldn't back down from it. I have lots of love for just a Mr. Right, or Mr. Right and then some mini-Mr. Rights.

It's not a selfish decision. To have or not have children is a lifestyle choice.

It is quite a change. I would have to reevaluate when I could go back to school. I would be part of a family, and not just worried about my schedule and time.

Hugh Freaking Dillon

if one person's path in life is selfish, then we're all guilty.

PJ_Soul

PureandEasy wrote:

Mamasan23 wrote:

I couldn't agree more with everything you said here!! Thanks for that link, I'm definitely gonna check it out. And yes, not having kids doesn't mean we 'have it all'. People have also gone so far as to question my finances - I don't have kids, I must be rich, right? :fp: :fp: :fp:

there's no such thing as a rich Pearl Jam fan.

Amen.


I've been meaning to post in this thread for a while. I'm a child-free woman, so obviously am in the camp that doesn't believe it's selfish, and honestly mamasan, if one my friends actually said that's what they think, I'd tear a strip out of them for saying it. As many have said, the only thing that's selfish is having kids and not being able to properly care for them or support them in one way or another, which is something that a LOT of people are guilty of, including several people I know.

I DEFINITELY sense the stigma surrounding childless women though, and that's not cool at all. But it bothers me less and less at time goes on ..... I think that by being able to do whatever I want whenever I want however I want, without the chaos of screaming and crying children, while all my friends have to rush home and do the parenting thing and can't even sit down to a meal in peace for 10 years straight, really softens the blow of that stigma for me though.

The entire time I was growing up until probably my mid to late 20s, I didn't ever want kids. But then I reached a time in my life when I decided I did after all (I am not sure how much that had to do with my feeling it was what I'm supposed to do in life... maybe a lot, maybe a little). So then I met someone who I wanted to have kids with... great. I was excited about it all. But then the relationship fell apart before any kids were made (phew!!), and now I'm mostly back to not really wanting kids again, but do acknowledge that if I met the right person who I wanted to share that experience with and who I think would be a good co-parent (and I wasn't over the hill, and I will be soon if I'm not already), I'd most likely want to have a child with him, and I'd be a great mom. I can see how that would be fulfilling. But without that special person/father of my child, I don't want kids just for the sake of kids, and I'm comfortable with feeling that way. Plus, more and more, I feel like not having kids is more responsible anyway, just because the world is kind of going to shit at a rapid pace IMO, and I'm not sure I would want to subject my children and their children to what might be in store for them. :? Grim, I know.

Mamasan23

BinauralJam wrote:

People with children should pay more taxes, not get brakes, your child contributes nothing, just takes takes takes, you love em so much, pay for em! lets put a price tag on your love. :twisted:

Ya know I have to say it kills me when I see how much of my taxes go to a school district that I'll never use :fp:

Mamasan23

RKCNDY wrote:

BinFrog wrote:

BinauralJam wrote:

People with children should pay more taxes, not get brakes, your child contributes nothing, just takes takes takes, you love em so much, pay for em! lets put a price tag on your love. :twisted:

They'll be paying for your social security. Pipe down.

what social security? It's already been stated that today's Gen X'ers won't have anything to collect...too many baby boomers living too long.

Exactly.

jumbojet

Mamasan23 wrote:

What do you guys think about the rising numbers of women that are choosing not to have children? Do you think that that is a selfish act?

I just realized that you dont have the best pick for a forum name to advocate child-freeness.

OK, OK, I know about the trilogy. :P

SD48277

At various times while I was growing up, my frustrated mother would say to me, "I hope someday you have kids just like you." That pretty much sealed the deal: no kids for me.

jbarbian

No, it is not selfish to not have children. People need to stop being so judgmental of one another! All that should matter is if you are a good person and a productive member of society. PERIOD. Kids, no kids, married, single, hetero, homo, faith-based or not.

catefrances

BinauralJam wrote:

People with children should pay more taxes, not get brakes, your child contributes nothing, just takes takes takes, you love em so much, pay for em! lets put a price tag on your love. :twisted:

my children are priceless. there aint enough money in the world by which to value them.

Kimmiebyrom

catefrances wrote:

BinauralJam wrote:

People with children should pay more taxes, not get brakes, your child contributes nothing, just takes takes takes, you love em so much, pay for em! lets put a price tag on your love. :twisted:

my children are priceless. there aint enough money in the world by which to value them.

Agreed!