Child-free Women

dimitrispearljam

its not selfish...its your life and you can choose what or how you gonna live..
the only issue is,if after years you regret about that choice..
and dont care what society thinks or says..societies are full of must and should and less of want
good luck

CServant

No children here either, by choice. While sometimes I think, "what if...," I'm also very content to have my wife of almost 7 years and just enjoy each others company. It makes traveling and going to games/concerts so easy as we never have to worry about a babysitter. The drawbacks, no one to leave my disposable income to and 1 very spoiled dog, but that kinda stuff takes care of itself. Still wating for a niece or nephew to step up, but I figure that'll happen when the time comes to take care of their old Auntie and Uncle. And in reality, we all die alone.

mca47

BinauralJam wrote:

Kids Suck

:thumbup:


Agreed!

RKCNDY

Selfish? no.

You know me, I don't want kids either. Actually talked to a male friend about this not too long ago. He said, "As a woman I find it hard to believe you wouldn't want to have kids, it's such a powerful thing" well, just because I have the 'ability' to bear children doesn't mean I want them.

You have a Honda, I have a Honda...the Honda's speedometer goes to 150 MPH...does that mean we should drive the Honda at 150 MPH 'just because' it says it can?

I think it's selfish when one has a child and either doesn't want them (the child is a 'mistake' or the woman felt social pressures from friends/family), or depends on the government to assist in raising the child(ren) (constantly being on welfare and popping out more kids i.e. 'working the system'-I have no issue if they use welfare as assistance to get back on their feet).

People have asked me "who will take care of you when you get old?" to me, that's pretty selfish...having a child purely to depend on them to 'take care of you' when you get old and senile? :nono: (I really hate that 'look' that some people with kids give you when you say, 'I don't have children'-they try to be all elitist)

I'm not a kid person at all, but there are some children that I like...they are usually respectful, well-behaved, and self-sufficient (i.e. they can entertain themselves when I visit my friends and don't need to be the center of attention 24/7).

If anybody is interested, there is a social group/club for the child-free: http://www.nokidding.net/index.html

Just be proud of your choice and have fun with it...
"I'm like 7-up and caffiene with kids...never had 'em, never will"
"If I wanted the effect of kids, I would spill grape juice all over my new white shag rug and get the same effect"
"I like my dogs just fine...they will never ask to borrow my car"
"If I ever get the slightest urge for kids, I just watch the first 15 minutes of Super Nanny and then remember why I don't want them"

(I must admit I was a bit smug when I read the part in the article that said "today not having kids means 'having it all'")

mickeyrat

Are fast and loose and should be highly sought after. IMO.

Good for you for not bowing to convention. To have a child just because that's what people do is , simply put, fucking stupid.

catefrances

mca47 wrote:

BinauralJam wrote:

Kids Suck

:thumbup:


Agreed!

the most difficult job in the world is to raise kids... and yes it sux.... sometimes.. but there are those times when your world shines andits because you look at these people you created and smile knowing they've turned into good people despite any misgivings you had and any false steps you think you trod. you know I didn't consciously choose to be a parent but when I see the results of my actions I am content knowing that my children have turned out to be good people despite any missteps they may have taken.

Who Princess

catefrances wrote:

the most difficult job in the world is to raise kids... and yes it sux.... sometimes.. but there are those times when your world shines andits because you look at these people you created and smile knowing they've turned into good people despite any misgivings you had and any false steps you think you trod. you know I didn't consciously choose to be a parent but when I see the results of my actions I am content knowing that my children have turned out to be good people despite any missteps they may have taken.

This is what I see with friends and family who in spite of everything that may go wrong, still really enjoy their kids. They accept them for the individuals they are rather than extensions of themselves that they can live through vicariously. I remember my sister and her husband high fiving each other when their second kid graduated from college. Sure, they were glad to have the expense behind them but there was also the satisfaction and pride in seeing his accomplishment.

justam

catefrances wrote:

the most difficult job in the world is to raise kids... and yes it sux.... sometimes.. but there are those times when your world shines andits because you look at these people you created and smile knowing they've turned into good people despite any misgivings you had and any false steps you think you trod. you know I didn't consciously choose to be a parent but when I see the results of my actions I am content knowing that my children have turned out to be good people despite any missteps they may have taken.

I respect people who don't have children but I, myself, have gained a lot from raising my two sons. Like you, some days I look at them and it makes me really happy to be in their company because I like who they have grown to be and I feel I added two beautiful men to the world!

bluegrace

Me too like the expression of being child-free, not childless. I'm a child-free woman as well. There was a time when I wasn't too happy about it, but I've realised that I do want a child/children in theory, but not in practice. And that I am perfectly happy as I am.

BinauralJam

Fact

Kimmiebyrom

lazloblue wrote:

I'm one and happy to say so.

I thought for many years I'd find Mr. Right and settle down and "do" the kid thing eventually. But as time passed I realized I was not all that interested in having kids of my own. Selfish, maybe a little sometimes. But the world has so many children that are neglected and I don't want to add to that.

I like who I am and hope to contribute to the world in so many other ways.

And you, my friend, are a ray of sunshine!

Kimmiebyrom

BinauralJam wrote:

Fact

That is absolutely hilarious. And full of truth.

Mamasan23

RKCNDY wrote:

Selfish? no.

You know me, I don't want kids either. Actually talked to a male friend about this not too long ago. He said, "As a woman I find it hard to believe you wouldn't want to have kids, it's such a powerful thing" well, just because I have the 'ability' to bear children doesn't mean I want them.

You have a Honda, I have a Honda...the Honda's speedometer goes to 150 MPH...does that mean we should drive the Honda at 150 MPH 'just because' it says it can?

I think it's selfish when one has a child and either doesn't want them (the child is a 'mistake' or the woman felt social pressures from friends/family), or depends on the government to assist in raising the child(ren) (constantly being on welfare and popping out more kids i.e. 'working the system'-I have no issue if they use welfare as assistance to get back on their feet).

People have asked me "who will take care of you when you get old?" to me, that's pretty selfish...having a child purely to depend on them to 'take care of you' when you get old and senile? :nono: (I really hate that 'look' that some people with kids give you when you say, 'I don't have children'-they try to be all elitist)

I'm not a kid person at all, but there are some children that I like...they are usually respectful, well-behaved, and self-sufficient (i.e. they can entertain themselves when I visit my friends and don't need to be the center of attention 24/7).

If anybody is interested, there is a social group/club for the child-free: http://www.nokidding.net/index.html

Just be proud of your choice and have fun with it...
"I'm like 7-up and caffiene with kids...never had 'em, never will"
"If I wanted the effect of kids, I would spill grape juice all over my new white shag rug and get the same effect"
"I like my dogs just fine...they will never ask to borrow my car"
"If I ever get the slightest urge for kids, I just watch the first 15 minutes of Super Nanny and then remember why I don't want them"

(I must admit I was a bit smug when I read the part in the article that said "today not having kids means 'having it all'")

I couldn't agree more with everything you said here!! Thanks for that link, I'm definitely gonna check it out. And yes, not having kids doesn't mean we 'have it all'. People have also gone so far as to question my finances - I don't have kids, I must be rich, right? :fp: :fp: :fp:

norm

Mamasan23 wrote:

People have also gone so far as to question my finances - I don't have kids, I must be rich, right? :fp: :fp: :fp:

i'd tell those people to mind their own fucking business

Mamasan23

norm wrote:

Mamasan23 wrote:

People have also gone so far as to question my finances - I don't have kids, I must be rich, right? :fp: :fp: :fp:

i'd tell those people to mind their own fucking business

Right?!!! It amazes me how many people think it's okay to bring this shit up

lazloblue

Kimmiebyrom wrote:

lazloblue wrote:

I'm one and happy to say so.

I thought for many years I'd find Mr. Right and settle down and "do" the kid thing eventually. But as time passed I realized I was not all that interested in having kids of my own. Selfish, maybe a little sometimes. But the world has so many children that are neglected and I don't want to add to that.

I like who I am and hope to contribute to the world in so many other ways.

And you, my friend, are a ray of sunshine!

Thanks girlie!! I think your a special kinda lady who chose to have and love kiddos!!

Kimmiebyrom

lazloblue wrote:

Kimmiebyrom wrote:

lazloblue wrote:

I'm one and happy to say so.

I thought for many years I'd find Mr. Right and settle down and "do" the kid thing eventually. But as time passed I realized I was not all that interested in having kids of my own. Selfish, maybe a little sometimes. But the world has so many children that are neglected and I don't want to add to that.

I like who I am and hope to contribute to the world in so many other ways.

And you, my friend, are a ray of sunshine!

Thanks girlie!! I think your a special kinda lady who chose to have and love kiddos!!

I can't imagine my life without them!

Loulou

People that say kids suck must be talking about other peoples children sucking. It's completely different when you have your own.

Loulou

By no means am I suggesting that everyone should have them though.

jumbojet

hedonist wrote:

BinFrog, as I mentioned earlier, it IS a selfish choice (for/to me, anyway) but also a necessary one.
I've often been curious as to the other end of the spectrum - what was the impetus for having a child or children? I don't begrudge that urge/desire but just don't understand it.

Oh, that's easy. You just decide, "The world needs my genes to perpetuate."

The thread seems to be more directed at women but as a man, having a child at 39-year gives some kind of new-found energy at your mid-life. It is some sort of a solution to mid-life crisis.

It kind of makes you a prisoner to house so your currently leisure expenditures decrease somehow. But I am sure, in a matter of months, my wife will be probably planning a good comeback for costly leisure activities. :fp: :evil:

And I constantly experienced all kinds of harrassment and pressures and questioning from family / friends about when I will get married and then when I will get kids. :roll: :roll: