Describe the most disastrous date you've been on

JonnyPistachio

Title says it all. I've had two that we're pretty bad. I wish I had written them all down though.. some doozies.

:corn:

BinauralJam

She talked for 6 hours, i said nothing

PureandEasy

Went to Ocean City, NJ with this guy and we spent pretty much all day there – and it was a first date. Longest first date ever.

Ended up with a wicked sunburn and a distaste for my date.

dankind

JonnyPistachio wrote:

Title says it all. I've had two that we're pretty bad. I wish I had written them all down though.. some doozies.

:corn:

So we're just supposed to describe our disasters and you give us nothing? :nono:

Details Mr. Pistachio, then we'll talk. Maybe.... :P

rick1zoo2

the first date with my ex. it was when we were in college, went to the sizzler, then wrecked my life for 20+ years. the end.

Mamasan23

JonnyPistachio wrote:

Title says it all. I've had two that we're pretty bad. I wish I had written them all down though.. some doozies.

:corn:

Do tell.

SPEEDY MCCREADY

Was dating some bimbo about 20 years ago, it was Thanksgiving Day and I was visiting my parents, solo. I was supposed to go meet the bimbo and her family, after dinner with my folks. I arrive at bimbos family house, and introduce myself to everyone in the room. The whole time I see bimbo standing there with some weird look in her eyes. When I walk up to bimbo she says to me: Whats her name? I say:HUH? Bimbo says: I know damned well you were not at your parents all this time, so whats her name.

I turned around shook everyones hand, said it was a pleasure meeting everyone, and never saw Bimbo again.

dimitrispearljam

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

Was dating some bimbo about 20 years ago, it was Thanksgiving Day and I was visiting my parents, solo. I was supposed to go meet the bimbo and her family, after dinner with my folks. I arrive at bimbos family house, and introduce myself to everyone in the room. The whole time I see bimbo standing there with some weird look in her eyes. When I walk up to bimbo she says to me: Whats her name? I say:HUH? Bimbo says: I know damned well you were not at your parents all this time, so whats her name.

I turned around shook everyones hand, said it was a pleasure meeting everyone, and never saw Bimbo again.

oh boy!!those are crazy..

JonnyPistachio

hey, im the host of this thread! You all first! just kiddin.. eating, lunch, then i'll type..

SPEEDY MCCREADY

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

Was dating some bimbo about 20 years ago, it was Thanksgiving Day and I was visiting my parents, solo. I was supposed to go meet the bimbo and her family, after dinner with my folks. I arrive at bimbos family house, and introduce myself to everyone in the room. The whole time I see bimbo standing there with some weird look in her eyes. When I walk up to bimbo she says to me: Whats her name? I say:HUH? Bimbo says: I know damned well you were not at your parents all this time, so whats her name.

I turned around shook everyones hand, said it was a pleasure meeting everyone, and never saw Bimbo again.

Oh yeah..
Bimbo once FAILED the written test to become a janitor.

She STUDIED? To take a test to become a janitor, and FAILED the written test?

Enkidu

I may have posted this before -

Went out with a guy I was working with in the music library at UCLA. I had to drive, he didn't drive (was from Boston or NYC). We had an okay time, dinner, went back to his place, had wine. He walked me to my car, handed me a note and it said:

"These are the things you'll have to change if you want to keep going out with me. Number one, stop smoking. I won't date a smoker. Number two, don't talk about your roommates so much, I don't know them or care about them. Etc."

Really, truly. First and last date.

Enkidu

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

Was dating some bimbo about 20 years ago, it was Thanksgiving Day and I was visiting my parents, solo. I was supposed to go meet the bimbo and her family, after dinner with my folks. I arrive at bimbos family house, and introduce myself to everyone in the room. The whole time I see bimbo standing there with some weird look in her eyes. When I walk up to bimbo she says to me: Whats her name? I say:HUH? Bimbo says: I know damned well you were not at your parents all this time, so whats her name.

I turned around shook everyones hand, said it was a pleasure meeting everyone, and never saw Bimbo again.

Oh yeah..
Bimbo once FAILED the written test to become a janitor.

She STUDIED? To take a test to become a janitor, and FAILED the written test?

What? What kind of test? HILARIOUS.

SPEEDY MCCREADY

How hard can the written test be, to become a janitor at a High-School.

Sample Question:

What do you do when some poor kid vomits in the hallway?

A. Throw some of that sawdust crap on it, and sweep it away?
B. Stuff marshmellows up your ass, and dance like a chicken?
C. Call 9-11 and evacuate the building?

PureandEasy

Enkidu wrote:

I may have posted this before -

Went out with a guy I was working with in the music library at UCLA. I had to drive, he didn't drive (was from Boston or NYC). We had an okay time, dinner, went back to his place, had wine. He walked me to my car, handed me a note and it said:

"These are the things you'll have to change if you want to keep going out with me. Number one, stop smoking. I won't date a smoker. Number two, don't talk about your roommates so much, I don't know them or care about them. Etc."

Really, truly. First and last date.

WOW!

Mamasan23

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

Was dating some bimbo about 20 years ago, it was Thanksgiving Day and I was visiting my parents, solo. I was supposed to go meet the bimbo and her family, after dinner with my folks. I arrive at bimbos family house, and introduce myself to everyone in the room. The whole time I see bimbo standing there with some weird look in her eyes. When I walk up to bimbo she says to me: Whats her name? I say:HUH? Bimbo says: I know damned well you were not at your parents all this time, so whats her name.

I turned around shook everyones hand, said it was a pleasure meeting everyone, and never saw Bimbo again.

WOW!

Dissidentman

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

How hard can the written test be, to become a janitor at a High-School.

Sample Question:

What do you do when some poor kid vomits in the hallway?

A. Throw some of that sawdust crap on it, and sweep it away?
B. Stuff marshmellows up your ass, and dance like a chicken?
C. Call 9-11 and evacuate the building?

Look what I just bought you

dimitrispearljam

Enkidu wrote:

I may have posted this before -

Went out with a guy I was working with in the music library at UCLA. I had to drive, he didn't drive (was from Boston or NYC). We had an okay time, dinner, went back to his place, had wine. He walked me to my car, handed me a note and it said:

"These are the things you'll have to change if you want to keep going out with me. Number one, stop smoking. I won't date a smoker. Number two, don't talk about your roommates so much, I don't know them or care about them. Etc."

Really, truly. First and last date.

wtf??

mysticweed

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

Was dating some bimbo about 20 years ago, it was Thanksgiving Day and I was visiting my parents, solo. I was supposed to go meet the bimbo and her family, after dinner with my folks. I arrive at bimbos family house, and introduce myself to everyone in the room. The whole time I see bimbo standing there with some weird look in her eyes. When I walk up to bimbo she says to me: Whats her name? I say:HUH? Bimbo says: I know damned well you were not at your parents all this time, so whats her name.

I turned around shook everyones hand, said it was a pleasure meeting everyone, and never saw Bimbo again.

Oh yeah..
Bimbo once FAILED the written test to become a janitor.

She STUDIED? To take a test to become a janitor, and FAILED the written test?

best part of the story

studied and failed the janitorial test

dimitrispearljam

must be back at 90's,met a girl at bar we end up at her place...

see her one more time after 2 days..

after 2-3 weeks he pass from my place....

was strange how she knew where was my house

she told me she was pregnant 2 months and it was mine..

i never laughed so hard in my life..

after i told her i know her 2-3 weeks only,how is this possible,she continue the lie and told me a mother knows

then i play the card,that cant happen cos i have healthy issue and cant have babies..

took her 20 seconds to leave my place..

Dissidentman

dimitrispearljam wrote:

must be back at 90's,met a girl at bar we end up at her place...

see her one more time after 2 days..

after 2-3 weeks he pass from my place....

was strange how she knew where was my house

she told me she was pregnant 2 months and it was mine..

i never laughed so hard in my life..

after i told her i know her 2-3 weeks only,how is this possible,she continue the lie and told me a mother knows

then i play the card,that cant happen cos i have healthy issue and cant have babies..

took her 20 seconds to leave my place..

She of all people should know that you can't have babies that way...

81

We should cherish our dates. It's always special when you can share a moment with someone else, whether it is just one date or 10000 dates.

Better Dan

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

Was dating some bimbo about 20 years ago, it was Thanksgiving Day and I was visiting my parents, solo. I was supposed to go meet the bimbo and her family, after dinner with my folks. I arrive at bimbos family house, and introduce myself to everyone in the room. The whole time I see bimbo standing there with some weird look in her eyes. When I walk up to bimbo she says to me: Whats her name? I say:HUH? Bimbo says: I know damned well you were not at your parents all this time, so whats her name.

I turned around shook everyones hand, said it was a pleasure meeting everyone, and never saw Bimbo again.

Oh yeah..
Bimbo once FAILED the written test to become a janitor.

She STUDIED? To take a test to become a janitor, and FAILED the written test?

:fp: :fp: :shock: :shock: :? :?

JonnyPistachio

1. I met a girl maybe 12 years ago who lived about 45 minutes south of me. We met for a date in between, and she seemed nice. it was a decent date. She was smart and interesting. then I went to her place once. Then we talked on the phone a few more times and during the conversation, she asked about my job. I told her I did video production. Then she asked where I live, I said near the intracoastal waterway by a park and gave her directions because she was coming to my place for the third date. But then she even asked what kind of car I drove, so I was getting a little put off. I had a decent car (subaru wrx).

Anyways, she comes to my place finally a few days later (and planned to stay overnight). My apartment was very small, old, and nothing special, but I loved it. It was a great location. But when she arrived, she looked around and said, "I thought you lived by the intracoastal." All of a sudden it dawned on me that she lived in Ft.Lauderdale where anything near the intracoastal was VERY expensive. She asked where the bathroom was and when I showed her, she refused to use it because there was a crack in the window and a stairway to the upstairs apartment very close to the window. (you couldnt see in though). She looked around my apartment appallingly, and wouldnt even sit down. Then she said, "I thought you were a movie producer." wtf? I told her I did educational video production. She was very disappointed. Then I suggested we walk to the restaurant. It was a nice night and it was only three blocks. She wouldnt walk. Thats no big deal though.. the dinner was very awkward, and I realized that she was looking for someone with far more wealth than I had. Needless to say, she didnt stay overnight. South Florida is a place that can be very hard to date.

dimitrispearljam

Dissidentman wrote:

dimitrispearljam wrote:

must be back at 90's,met a girl at bar we end up at her place...

see her one more time after 2 days..

after 2-3 weeks he pass from my place....

was strange how she knew where was my house

she told me she was pregnant 2 months and it was mine..

i never laughed so hard in my life..

after i told her i know her 2-3 weeks only,how is this possible,she continue the lie and told me a mother knows

then i play the card,that cant happen cos i have healthy issue and cant have babies..

took her 20 seconds to leave my place..

She of all people should know that you can't have babies that way...

i dont know...that time i thought someone was making a joke or something..cant happen this stupid thing.

drinkbigredinstead

Halfway through dinner he told me his grandfather was a grand dragon or wizard or whatever stupid name those stupid racist people call themselves. Worst part is he seemed proud!

Mamasan23

JonnyPistachio wrote:

1. I met a girl maybe 12 years ago who lived about 45 minutes south of me. We met for a date in between, and she seemed nice. it was a decent date. She was smart and interesting. then I went to her place once. Then we talked on the phone a few more times and during the conversation, she asked about my job. I told her I did video production. Then she asked where I live, I said near the intracoastal waterway by a park and gave her directions because she was coming to my place for the third date. But then she even asked what kind of car I drove, so I was getting a little put off. I had a decent car (subaru wrx).

Anyways, she comes to my place finally a few days later (and planned to stay overnight). My apartment was very small, old, and nothing special, but I loved it. It was a great location. But when she arrived, she looked around and said, "I thought you lived by the intracoastal." All of a sudden it dawned on me that she lived in Ft.Lauderdale where anything near the intracoastal was VERY expensive. She asked where the bathroom was and when I showed her, she refused to use it because there was a crack in the window and a stairway to the upstairs apartment very close to the window. (you couldnt see in though). She looked around my apartment appallingly, and wouldnt even sit down. Then she said, "I thought you were a movie producer." wtf? I told her I did educational video production. She was very disappointed. Then I suggested we walk to the restaurant. It was a nice night and it was only three blocks. She wouldnt walk. Thats no big deal though.. the dinner was very awkward, and I realized that she was looking for someone with far more wealth than I had. Needless to say, she didnt stay overnight. South Florida is a place that can be very hard to date.

I ain't sayin' she's a gold digger..but she ain't messing with no broke.........

Beast!

Black Diamond

Blind date fixed up by my best friends sister... She lived on Long Island... I found out she lived in one the most exclusive parts of LI...

I drove up in my Toyota Corolla... Saw her at window rollling her eyes... She sent out her maid to inform me that the date was off.

rick1zoo2

JonnyPistachio wrote:

1. I met a girl maybe 12 years ago who lived about 45 minutes south of me. We met for a date in between, and she seemed nice. it was a decent date. She was smart and interesting. then I went to her place once. Then we talked on the phone a few more times and during the conversation, she asked about my job. I told her I did video production. Then she asked where I live, I said near the intracoastal waterway by a park and gave her directions because she was coming to my place for the third date. But then she even asked what kind of car I drove, so I was getting a little put off. I had a decent car (subaru wrx).

Anyways, she comes to my place finally a few days later (and planned to stay overnight). My apartment was very small, old, and nothing special, but I loved it. It was a great location. But when she arrived, she looked around and said, "I thought you lived by the intracoastal." All of a sudden it dawned on me that she lived in Ft.Lauderdale where anything near the intracoastal was VERY expensive. She asked where the bathroom was and when I showed her, she refused to use it because there was a crack in the window and a stairway to the upstairs apartment very close to the window. (you couldnt see in though). She looked around my apartment appallingly, and wouldnt even sit down. Then she said, "I thought you were a movie producer." wtf? I told her I did educational video production. She was very disappointed. Then I suggested we walk to the restaurant. It was a nice night and it was only three blocks. She wouldnt walk. Thats no big deal though.. the dinner was very awkward, and I realized that she was looking for someone with far more wealth than I had. Needless to say, she didnt stay overnight. South Florida is a place that can be very hard to date.

I think I would have been dissapointed too

Mamasan23

For my 20th birthday the guy I was dating said he was going to take me to a nice restaurant downtown. I wasn't expecting the Signature Room or anything like that, but he took me to Ed Debevic's. Which, for those of you that don't know Chicago, pretty much sells only burgers and fries and their gimmick is that they treat you like shit. So that was fun. My birthday's in the summer so I wanted to just walk around the city afterwards, along the lake on the beach or whatever. He wasn't in the mood for that, so we left and went back to his place where we proceeded to scream at each other for a good hour or two. Worst. Birthday. Ever.

dimitrispearljam

Black Diamond wrote:

Blind date fixed up by my best friends sister... She lived on Long Island... I found out she lived in one the most exclusive parts of LI...

I drove up in my Toyota Corolla... Saw her at window rollling her eyes... She sent out her maid to inform me that the date was off.

:shock:

dimitrispearljam

JonnyPistachio wrote:

1. I met a girl maybe 12 years ago who lived about 45 minutes south of me. We met for a date in between, and she seemed nice. it was a decent date. She was smart and interesting. then I went to her place once. Then we talked on the phone a few more times and during the conversation, she asked about my job. I told her I did video production. Then she asked where I live, I said near the intracoastal waterway by a park and gave her directions because she was coming to my place for the third date. But then she even asked what kind of car I drove, so I was getting a little put off. I had a decent car (subaru wrx).

Anyways, she comes to my place finally a few days later (and planned to stay overnight). My apartment was very small, old, and nothing special, but I loved it. It was a great location. But when she arrived, she looked around and said, "I thought you lived by the intracoastal." All of a sudden it dawned on me that she lived in Ft.Lauderdale where anything near the intracoastal was VERY expensive. She asked where the bathroom was and when I showed her, she refused to use it because there was a crack in the window and a stairway to the upstairs apartment very close to the window. (you couldnt see in though). She looked around my apartment appallingly, and wouldnt even sit down. Then she said, "I thought you were a movie producer." wtf? I told her I did educational video production. She was very disappointed. Then I suggested we walk to the restaurant. It was a nice night and it was only three blocks. She wouldnt walk. Thats no big deal though.. the dinner was very awkward, and I realized that she was looking for someone with far more wealth than I had. Needless to say, she didnt stay overnight. South Florida is a place that can be very hard to date.

oh man..that was bad