Got a first date lined up for Saturday night....

pjhawks

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

So now she is not returning my calls, even after I left her a vociemail saying "call me back".
She instead texted me the next morning saying sorry that she missed my call then went to ask if any luck with the job hunt and ended with take care. I sent her a reply saying that's okay and answered her question on the job hunt situation.
But at the end of the first date she seemed genuine when she said she'd like to catch up again soon again. :?
I either screwed something up during the first date, she does not want to date a bum with no job, or she is playing games.
Would you call one more time?

i'd say wait 2 or 3 weeks then text her then and ask her if she wants to get together again. seems like she is in no rush so no need to push her.

Thoughts_Arrive

Thanks all, appreciate your advice.

Another question, complimenting what a girl is wearing on the 1st date, good or bad idea?
All the dating sites I've read say to compliment.

81

depends on what she is wearing. :P

yes, a compliement is good.

Thoughts_Arrive

The 81 wrote:

depends on what she is wearing. :P

yes, a compliement is good.

A nice leather jacket.

Suzi78

Dude you need to stop reading all those dating site guides...you're completely over thinking all this. People are human beings, not robots. Just use your common sense and relax a bit. Most women like to be complimented on how they dress...just like most guys do, right? I think you just need to date a lot more and not get hung up on this one girl. If she didn't call you back, she's clearly not interested. Could be anything really...maybe it was the fact that you don't have a job...maybe not. Maybe she just didn't feel any chemistry/sexual attraction and doesn't want to waste any time. Could be a combination of things...who knows? Doesn't really matter though. Move on and get yourself some new dates. That's all
Good luck!

Thoughts_Arrive

Suzi78 wrote:

Dude you need to stop reading all those dating site guides...you're completely over thinking all this. People are human beings, not robots. Just use your common sense and relax a bit. Most women like to be complimented on how they dress...just like most guys do, right? I think you just need to date a lot more and not get hung up on this one girl. If she didn't call you back, she's clearly not interested. Could be anything really...maybe it was the fact that you don't have a job...maybe not. Maybe she just didn't feel any chemistry/sexual attraction and doesn't want to waste any time. Could be a combination of things...who knows? Doesn't really matter though. Move on and get yourself some new dates. That's all
Good luck!

True, I don't want to come across as rehearsed/scripted but just needed to know the important do's and don't's.
I tend to over-think and over-analyze things, it is how my mind works unfortunately.
Thanks.

81

do compliement

don't text wiener photo's

Thoughts_Arrive

The 81 wrote:

do compliement

don't text wiener photo's

Suzi78

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

Suzi78 wrote:

Dude you need to stop reading all those dating site guides...you're completely over thinking all this. People are human beings, not robots. Just use your common sense and relax a bit. Most women like to be complimented on how they dress...just like most guys do, right? I think you just need to date a lot more and not get hung up on this one girl. If she didn't call you back, she's clearly not interested. Could be anything really...maybe it was the fact that you don't have a job...maybe not. Maybe she just didn't feel any chemistry/sexual attraction and doesn't want to waste any time. Could be a combination of things...who knows? Doesn't really matter though. Move on and get yourself some new dates. That's all
Good luck!

True, I don't want to come across as rehearsed/scripted but just needed to know the important do's and don't's.
I tend to over-think and over-analyze things, it is how my mind works unfortunately.
Thanks.

The only way to learn the do's and don'ts is by experience. You will probably have 10-20 more dates like this before finding someone who's actually worth your time and where the feeling is mutual. And yeah, like 81 said, no wiener shots...at least not until the third date. You're welcome

unlost dogs

If she's playing games with things like not calling back... RUN DON'T WALK away! Stuff like that never gets better. Big, big red flag.

I agree with the advise to stay away from the dating sites.

How about finding a buddy and going on a double date? It might take some of the pressure off you.

Thoughts_Arrive

unlost dogs wrote:

If she's playing games with things like not calling back... RUN DON'T WALK away! Stuff like that never gets better. Big, big red flag.

I agree with the advise to stay away from the dating sites.

How about finding a buddy and going on a double date? It might take some of the pressure off you.

I haven't tried dating sites.
I meant site with dating advice and youtube with some cassanova dude giving advice lol.

I was actually thinking I should try a dating site seeing I don't go out much these days.

LikeAnOcean

unlost dogs wrote:

If she's playing games with things like not calling back... RUN DON'T WALK away! Stuff like that never gets better. Big, big red flag.

I agree with the advise to stay away from the dating sites.

How about finding a buddy and going on a double date? It might take some of the pressure off you.

There is NOTHING wrong with dating sites. It's no different than meeting someone anyplace else. 40% of people meet on the internet these days. I met my love on a dating site. Just stick to the free sites. There's no reason to have to pay.

As in life, you may go on a few dozen internet dates before you meet somebody, but don't take them too seriously and don't over think. Just be yourself.

I think it met my girl have after a dozen or so internet dates. Meeting a girl online is better than a bar or creepily stalking somebody at a grocery store or something. And when you get to a certain age, you don't have many friends with single friends they can introduce.

The internet is a great place to start because you know what the other person wants. Just be patient.


And I've learned, the advise of others doesn't always work. Do what YOU feel is right so you meet somebody who likes you for who YOU are.

rick1zoo2

Gob wrote:

unlost dogs wrote:

If she's playing games with things like not calling back... RUN DON'T WALK away! Stuff like that never gets better. Big, big red flag.

I agree with the advise to stay away from the dating sites.

How about finding a buddy and going on a double date? It might take some of the pressure off you.

There is NOTHING wrong with dating sites. It's no different than meeting someone anyplace else. 40% of people meet on the internet these days. I met my love on a dating site. Just stick to the free sites. There's no reason to have to pay.

As in life, you may go on a few dozen internet dates before you meet somebody, but don't take them too seriously and don't over think. Just be yourself.

I think it met my girl have after a dozen or so internet dates. Meeting a girl online is better than a bar or creepily stalking somebody at a grocery store or something. And when you get to a certain age, you don't have many friends with single friends they can introduce.

The internet is a great place to start because you know what the other person wants. Just be patient.


And I've learned, the advise of others doesn't always work. Do what YOU feel is right so you meet somebody who likes you for who YOU are.

You make good points. I can't speak to dating sites. I met my girlfriend years ago on the U2 forum and we became friends and I got to know her better in person on a few fan get togethers in NYC.

polaris_x

i think most people are saying to avoid the internet for dating advice as in the do's and don'ts ... not internet dating per se ...

LikeAnOcean

polaris_x wrote:

i think most people are saying to avoid the internet for dating advice as in the do's and don'ts ... not internet dating per se ...

Ah, ok... As far as advice, everyone is different. My girl would be happy no matter what we did or where we go. She loves me for who I am and not what we spend our time doing. Just being together, wether it's an inteligent conversation, or just staring eachother in the eyes most of the night is when you know its going to work.

Suzi78

Just don't stare into her eyes on the first date. That's kinda creepy...

polaris_x

Gob wrote:

polaris_x wrote:

i think most people are saying to avoid the internet for dating advice as in the do's and don'ts ... not internet dating per se ...

Ah, ok... As far as advice, everyone is different. My girl would be happy no matter what we did or where we go. She loves me for who I am and not what we spend our time doing. Just being together, wether it's an inteligent conversation, or just staring eachother in the eyes most of the night is when you know its going to work.

Suzi78

polaris_x wrote:

Gob wrote:

polaris_x wrote:

i think most people are saying to avoid the internet for dating advice as in the do's and don'ts ... not internet dating per se ...

Ah, ok... As far as advice, everyone is different. My girl would be happy no matter what we did or where we go. She loves me for who I am and not what we spend our time doing. Just being together, wether it's an inteligent conversation, or just staring eachother in the eyes most of the night is when you know its going to work.

C'mon now...that's a bit harsh...








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norm

Suzi78 wrote:

Just don't stare into her eyes on the first date. That's kinda creepy...

or stare at anything else

Suzi78

norm wrote:

Suzi78 wrote:

Just don't stare into her eyes on the first date. That's kinda creepy...

or stare at anything else

or look like this guy...