Got a first date lined up for Saturday night....

Thoughts_Arrive

dr0ptheleash wrote:

pjhawks wrote:

wing it. go for the coffee and if you enjoy it suggest something else. and be honest. if you are nervous nothing wrong with telling her that. saying you don't know what to say is better than sitting there saying nothing.

^ Good advice! It definitely seems like she wants to spend time with you, so think of something to do after coffee if things go well. Is there a nice park nearby? Somewhere you could stroll to with pretty scenery? (not something where she will think you're just taking her to a "make out spot" or whatnot haha) At least near me there are tons of parks with pretty fountains and benches and lighting and statues. It's casual and romantic. Make it a night to remember, have fun. Enjoy yourself!!!!

Nah no parks, it is not in the city, it's in the suburbs, a popular small strip with cafes and restaurants.

dr0ptheleash

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

dr0ptheleash wrote:

pjhawks wrote:

wing it. go for the coffee and if you enjoy it suggest something else. and be honest. if you are nervous nothing wrong with telling her that. saying you don't know what to say is better than sitting there saying nothing.

^ Good advice! It definitely seems like she wants to spend time with you, so think of something to do after coffee if things go well. Is there a nice park nearby? Somewhere you could stroll to with pretty scenery? (not something where she will think you're just taking her to a "make out spot" or whatnot haha) At least near me there are tons of parks with pretty fountains and benches and lighting and statues. It's casual and romantic. Make it a night to remember, have fun. Enjoy yourself!!!!

Nah no parks, it is not in the city, it's in the suburbs, a popular small strip with cafes and restaurants.

Then you should have plenty to do! Don't worry! Lots of places you could wander to if necessary. Be yourself, and have fun

Thoughts_Arrive

SPEEDY MCCREADY wrote:

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

Thank you all for the advice and feedback, much appreciated.
As for the coffee on a Sat night not being a good idea mentioned earlier, she suggested we do something Sat night, I always thought and read that coffee or drinks at a bar are most suitable for a first date.
Maybe I should've suggested Sunday lunchtime, oh wells.
Where we are meeting up is not a walking distance to her house.
I hope she doesn't want to go city, too much traffic.
It is all cafe's and restaurants where we are going, not sure if there is a place more exciting there, see what happens.
I always had in my mind something "more exciting" for a second date.
I am going by the rules on youtube and online dating advice sites.

You are already overthinking this!!!!! hehehehe

Relax my friend.....

I am trying to, been having problems relaxing during the day and falling asleep at night since. Nervous and anxious as.
Want to make this work, sick of being single at almost 27 yrs, so I feel more under pressure to not blow it.
Plus I've had job interviews that I am waiting to find out if I got the job.
Too many things on my mind and I'm constantly nervous/anxious atm. :?
Thanks all.

Thoughts_Arrive

dr0ptheleash wrote:

Then you should have plenty to do! Don't worry! Lots of places you could wander to if necessary. Be yourself, and have fun

Thanks
I think because it is a Saturday night and a long weekend here she wants to do more.
If it get's to that it's gonna be a trip to the city or at a shopping center complex in the suburbs with a bowling or pool place.

Evil Merlin Part Deux

Congrats on your first date!

As many others have said, seriously, you have a good starting point, and then just wing it from there. Go with the vibe of the night and just let it take you wherever it leads. No reason to stress over thinking of what to do next, should there be a second part, stressing over sticking to a plan and hoping she likes it. You don't want anything to take focus off of her. Afterall, that's what the night is about, you and her getting together, you've already done that part, so just sit back and see where your minds take you two.

81

bowling or pool is always good. mini golf is always a good time. you can always make a small wager which can be fun

depending on what time you are meeting, grabbing a bite to eat would be an option.

going for a walk is always a good option.

have a list of things to talk about.

what she does
what's she been up to since HS
fav bands
movies
hobbies
travel

don't marry her on the first night....just talk and see if you two might have enough interests to move forward.

if things go well and you two have a good time, make sure you give her a hug good night.

PureandEasy

The 81 wrote:

bowling or pool is always good. mini golf is always a good time. you can always make a small wager which can be fun

depending on what time you are meeting, grabbing a bite to eat would be an option.

going for a walk is always a good option.

have a list of things to talk about.

what she does
what's she been up to since HS
fav bands
movies
hobbies
travel

don't marry her on the first night....just talk and see if you two might have enough interests to move forward.

if things go well and you two have a good time, make sure you give her a hug good night.

definitely agree with the bowling or mini golf, good clean fun

and the hug good night, awwwwwwwwww how sweet

Fifthelement

PureandEasy wrote:

The 81 wrote:

bowling or pool is always good. mini golf is always a good time. you can always make a small wager which can be fun

depending on what time you are meeting, grabbing a bite to eat would be an option.

going for a walk is always a good option.

have a list of things to talk about.

what she does
what's she been up to since HS
fav bands
movies
hobbies
travel

don't marry her on the first night....just talk and see if you two might have enough interests to move forward.

if things go well and you two have a good time, make sure you give her a hug good night.

definitely agree with the bowling or mini golf, good clean fun

and the hug good night, awwwwwwwwww how sweet

Great advice Good luck M. Just remember to have fun. Let it be a very organic meeting. Try not to over-think things and just live in the moment

And most importantly . . . Be sound

81

i'm a sweet kind of guy....

plus it gives you a chance to see if the bra is padded.

PureandEasy

The 81 wrote:

i'm a sweet kind of guy....

plus it gives you a chance to see if the bra is padded.

so much for good clean fun

pjhawks

Thoughts_Arrive wrote:

I am trying to, been having problems relaxing during the day and falling asleep at night since. Nervous and anxious as.
Want to make this work, sick of being single at almost 27 yrs, so I feel more under pressure to not blow it.
Plus I've had job interviews that I am waiting to find out if I got the job.
Too many things on my mind and I'm constantly nervous/anxious atm. :?
Thanks all.

the hardest part of meeting someone is the 1st impression and since you knew each other previously she already has that 1st impression of you. relax and don't put this girl on such a pedestal. enjoy the night and don't worry about getting into a relationship already. enjoy the hour, two, three or whatever it turns into. if you focus on the 1st 5 minutes you'll be shocked at how quickly it turns into 3, 4, 5 hours.

PillowPants

Slap upside the head wrote:

Bring a rubber and a backup plan to bolt.
Never hurts to be prepared.

ok... so i've only read the first 2 posts

i just need to say

i love this message board

Staggering Genius

EmBleve wrote:

lukins.lawyer wrote:

#1. Ask her a ton of questions. Fact: Women just want to talk and want men to listen.

This is not always the case, especially for shy women. I would prefer not to do most of the talking at that stage of the game, but that's just me. But the asking questions part is good, shows interest.
and, yes, pj20!

Definitely not always the case. I went on a date a few months ago and the guy sat there and asked me question after question after question. It was the worst date I have ever been on.

Engage in conversation. Don't just ask questions.

Good luck

sandgroper

Advice... hmmmm... where do i begin. From my own persoanl experience here's a few things NOT to do:

Don't stare at her rack the whole time, it can be a bit off putting
Don't lend her a CD unless you don't care if you don't get it back
Don't tell her you live with your mother and that it's an agreed living arrangement
Don't bring and example of your mates wedding album

I'm sure i have a lot more, but on a more serious note i just went on a date last night in a popular cafe/restaurant area and we went for a walk first before finding a nice cafe to sit down in. I thought that was a nice way to start things off without having that sit down face to face conversation straight away which can be a bit intimidating.

EmBleve

Staggering Genius wrote:

EmBleve wrote:

lukins.lawyer wrote:

#1. Ask her a ton of questions. Fact: Women just want to talk and want men to listen.

This is not always the case, especially for shy women. I would prefer not to do most of the talking at that stage of the game, but that's just me. But the asking questions part is good, shows interest.
and, yes, pj20!

Definitely not always the case. I went on a date a few months ago and the guy sat there and asked me question after question after question. It was the worst date I have ever been on.

Engage in conversation. Don't just ask questions.

Good luck

That sounds like an inquisition! Definitely engage. It's awkward, though, if someone doesn't ask things, otherwise (for me) I feel very put on the spot, like I have to come up with things to say. (not my thing)...but an interview?? nah.

PillowPants

she's got to be thinking you've gotten cocky "we'll see how it goes, maybe"




don't forget the test

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kW94hQQMTQw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lNNUl9jrzw

Thoughts_Arrive

PillowPants wrote:

she's got to be thinking you've gotten cocky "we'll see how it goes, maybe"




don't forget the test

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kW94hQQMTQw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lNNUl9jrzw

Shit I hope not, didn't intend to come across as cocky :?

Interesting test.

Thanks again to all.

unlost dogs

My first date with Mr. Unlost... he says, "You pick the restaurant, I like anything but seafood."

We go to "The Fishmonger."

Pretty much how it's been ever since.

(But I did reach over and unlock the door for him, PPFL.)

Phantom Pain

Don't stare at her camel toe

unlost dogs

Phantom Pain wrote:

Don't stare at her camel toe

I am so glad I know what that means... :?