Did you get the memo?

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Comments

  • DissidentmanDissidentman Posts: 15,378
    Dear liver,

    I apologize in advance.

    Sincerely,

    Mouth.
  • ClaireackClaireack Posts: 13,561
    Dear Brain

    I know you've been through the mill a bit this weekend. But I would really appreciate it if you would stop spinning round in circles and just shut the fuff up. I will give you chocolate if you do.

    Thanks.

    The rest of the body
  • RKCNDYRKCNDY Posts: 31,013
    Dear Ford Dealership,

    YOU SUCK.

    I set up an appointment for an oil change (which took over 30 minutes for some ungodly like reason), and then received a letter in the mail that states "a defect which relates to motor vehicle safety exists in your condition, we have authorized your dealer to replace the fuel delivery module free of charge. A leak may occur in the fuel delivery system and could cause a fire"

    So I called back to see if I could schedule the replacement the same day as the oil change. It took 2 hang-ups and 3 calls to be told by your service department, "Oh we'll check it and then if you qualify, we have to order the part"

    I get it, so it's not really all that important for you to keep a part that is involved in a RECALL in stock and let a customer take the chance getting into an accident or be subjected to a CAR FIRE.

    I already know I 'qualify' for the part and repair since the letter has the vehicle's VIN printed on it and tells me I 'must correct the problem in a timely manner otherwise Ford Motor Company will deny coverage for any vehicle damage that may result from the failure to have the recall performed on a timely basis"

    again, YOU SUCK. Thank god we don't personally own the vehicle, and now I know for sure, I will NEVER buy a Ford.

    Glad to see you are living up to your acronym...Found On Road Dead, Fix or Repair Daily, or backwards... Driver Return On Foot.

    did I mention, YOU SUCK? :angel:
    The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.

    - Christopher McCandless
  • Black DiamondBlack Diamond Posts: 25,107
    Dear NY,

    I miss you more when I visit

    Signed,

    Miami
    GoiMTvP.gif
  • afroannnieafroannnie Posts: 12,995
    Dear 4 pm,

    Please get here already.

    Thanks,
    anxious to start the weekend
    Show #13 was a lucky one for me....
  • ldent42ldent42 Posts: 7,859
    Dear Pandora,

    I'm not sure why you keep insisting that I like Edwin McCain, but I'm getting tired of telling you that I don't. The same goes for that 'kiss me' song.

    And 'Get Lucky' by Daft Punk? are you kidding? They played that at last call last weekend and I had it stuck in my head for three days afterword. I don't need a repeat of that, ever.

    It's like you don't even know me at all. And I paid for the premium service so that's pretty fucked up. You used to get me. WTF happened to you?

    Get your shit together.

    Sincerely,
    I will make winamp playlists if I have to.
    NYC 06/24/08-Auckland 11/27/09-Chch 11/29/09-Newark 05/18/10-Atlanta 09/22/12-Chicago 07/19/13-Brooklyn 10/18/13 & 10/19/13-Hartford 10/25/13-Baltimore 10/27/13-Auckland 1/17/14-GC 1/19/14-Melbourne 1/24/14-Sydney 1/26/14-Amsterdam 6/16/14 & 6/17/14-Milan 6/20/14-Berlin 6/26/14-Leeds 7/8/14-Milton Keynes 7/11/14-St. Louis 10/3/14-NYC 9/26/15
    LIVEFOOTSTEPS.ORG/USER/?USR=435
  • hgpjam11hgpjam11 Posts: 1,328
    Dear American Apparel,

    Thank you for finally making a women's PJ shirt that's long enough for even this very short person. Maybe on tall people, the other shirts were meant to be belly shirts. This new one is finally VG, and I would appreciate the new tour shirts in this length.

    Sincerely,
    Not tall enough to tuck it in
    I win.
  • justamjustam Posts: 21,409
    Dear Summer,

    It's been a dream, but Fall is coming home in a few days. I'm so sorry! Can we be sure to get together again next year?

    We can swim, we can walk, play, and work in the garden once more. Until then, I'll miss you!!

    Sincerely,
    Annie Oh
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • decides2dreamdecides2dream Posts: 14,977
    dear body,

    i know i have abused you something fierce these past couple of years (mind too, mea culpa) but could you please cut me some slack and forgive all ... so as i work to improve myself you go along with it? i'm not asking for a free pass, i plan on doing the work, taking care of you and appreciating you as i should, all i ask is you let me see results, and yes, the sooner the better. more motivating.

    grazie,
    decides2dream
    Stay with me...
    Let's just breathe...


    I am myself like you somehow


  • jbarbianjbarbian Posts: 991
    Dear Time Warner Cable and WTMJ,

    I don't want to know who's at fault, I don't care. What I do care about is football, yes, even pre-season football. Because the two of you cannot get your shit together at the negotiating table, I have been left to watch football on Telemundo. I did not do well in HS Spanish. This is not good.

    Time Warner- You have until next wednesday to figure this shit out or I am leaving. I will find another TV/internet provider. I will buy a dish. Fuck, if I have to watch one more game in Spanish, I will stand on my roof clothed in nothing but fucking tinfoil.

    Fuck you both,
    :evil:
  • KimmiebyromKimmiebyrom Posts: 1,832
    Dear Mean People of the World,

    You seriously don't have to be.

    Love,
    The Nerd Herd
    2003 Dallas
    2013 Wrigley
    2013 Dallas
    2013 Oklahoma City
    2013 Seattle

    How I choose to feel is how I am.
    There's just one word I still believe...and it's LOVE.
    "Take care of one another..." -EV
  • yellowwhoyellowwho Posts: 1,661
    Dear What appears to be a deliciously fresh and perfectly ripened banana,

    Why have you lied and tricked me into believing that just maybe, judging by your outside appearance that you won't let me down again when I proceed to peel your beautifully colored yellow skin back only for you to reveal your less than perfect core ?

    This has been going on for the past several years, and I thought I would have stopped this way sooner than now. Whats the deal ? Is something going on in the tropics ? Is it an environmental issue that needs to be addressed ? This has been driving me crazy and its been on my mind quite often,so much so that it has turned into an anxiety issue that usually starts around 10 am ( I usually eat lunch around 11 or 12) and continues for a few hours after as well usually in the form of anger.

    I'd really like to know, because , I really didn't want to say this but I never thought I would hate a fruit as much as I hate you !

    Signed,

    This has to be a conspiracy

    P.S.

    just so you know , I will still continue to eat you fully knowing that I will be disappointed
  • decides2dreamdecides2dream Posts: 14,977
    yellowwho wrote:



    just so you know , I will still continue to eat you fully knowing that I will be disappointed


    oh myyyyyyyy.
    :silent: :wtf: :lol:
    Stay with me...
    Let's just breathe...


    I am myself like you somehow


  • RKCNDYRKCNDY Posts: 31,013
    Dear AT&T,

    I love how you sent me an email saying that you can transfer all of my contacts from one phone to another.

    You even asked me what type of phone I want to transfer my contacts FROM.

    Well, your 'user friendly' website is not all that friendly, because you are asking me to DOWNLOAD AN APP to a DUMB PHONE to transfer the contacts to my new SMART PHONE.

    FYI, a dumb phone can't download apps. <
    hence why it's called a 'dumb phone' :idea:

    Keep up the good work! :thumbup:
    The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.

    - Christopher McCandless
  • rollingsrollings Posts: 7,124
    yellowwho wrote:
    Dear What appears to be a deliciously fresh and perfectly ripened banana,

    Why have you lied and tricked me into believing that just maybe, judging by your outside appearance that you won't let me down again when I proceed to peel your beautifully colored yellow skin back only for you to reveal your less than perfect core ?

    This has been going on for the past several years, and I thought I would have stopped this way sooner than now. Whats the deal ? Is something going on in the tropics ? Is it an environmental issue that needs to be addressed ? This has been driving me crazy and its been on my mind quite often,so much so that it has turned into an anxiety issue that usually starts around 10 am ( I usually eat lunch around 11 or 12) and continues for a few hours after as well usually in the form of anger.

    I'd really like to know, because , I really didn't want to say this but I never thought I would hate a fruit as much as I hate you !

    Signed,

    This has to be a conspiracy

    P.S.

    just so you know , I will still continue to eat you fully knowing that I will be disappointed

    I have never peeled a nice-looking banana that revealed anything other than a nice banana inside.

    Where do you buy your bad bananas from?
  • Green CircleGreen Circle Posts: 5,192
    Dear Drivers of the Massachusetts Turnpike...

    Please let me know how early I have to leave my house to NEVER hit
    and ounce of traffic in the morning? We have driven together for quite sometime now
    and no matter what time I leave 6:00am, 5:45am, 5:30am there is always
    a major stopping point somewhere...

    c'mon be honest, is there a conspiracy theory somewhere? You can trust me, I won't tell.

    thanks,

    GC
    "...And I fight back in my mind. Never lets me be right.
    I got memories. I got shit so much it don't show."
  • Green CircleGreen Circle Posts: 5,192
    Dear Chadwick...

    i'm really sorry for all the confusion...

    no hard feelings?


    GC
    "...And I fight back in my mind. Never lets me be right.
    I got memories. I got shit so much it don't show."
  • mickeyratmickeyrat Posts: 38,422
    rollings wrote:
    yellowwho wrote:
    Dear What appears to be a deliciously fresh and perfectly ripened banana,

    Why have you lied and tricked me into believing that just maybe, judging by your outside appearance that you won't let me down again when I proceed to peel your beautifully colored yellow skin back only for you to reveal your less than perfect core ?

    This has been going on for the past several years, and I thought I would have stopped this way sooner than now. Whats the deal ? Is something going on in the tropics ? Is it an environmental issue that needs to be addressed ? This has been driving me crazy and its been on my mind quite often,so much so that it has turned into an anxiety issue that usually starts around 10 am ( I usually eat lunch around 11 or 12) and continues for a few hours after as well usually in the form of anger.

    I'd really like to know, because , I really didn't want to say this but I never thought I would hate a fruit as much as I hate you !

    Signed,

    This has to be a conspiracy

    P.S.

    just so you know , I will still continue to eat you fully knowing that I will be disappointed

    I have never peeled a nice-looking banana that revealed anything other than a nice banana inside.

    Where do you buy your bad bananas from?
    they are picked way before they should be in order to satisfy demand. gassed with a benign gas to ripen artificially. Just before yellow while still greenish is the best flavor. once they hit full bright yellow the flavors gone. Usually eat one every morning.
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • mickeyratmickeyrat Posts: 38,422
    Dear Drivers of the Massachusetts Turnpike...

    Please let me know how early I have to leave my house to NEVER hit
    and ounce of traffic in the morning? We have driven together for quite sometime now
    and no matter what time I leave 6:00am, 5:45am, 5:30am there is always
    a major stopping point somewhere...

    c'mon be honest, is there a conspiracy theory somewhere? You can trust me, I won't tell.

    thanks,

    GC
    dear GC,

    wait til the jetsons spacecars become the norm. Then you're in for a real treat.

    signed ,
    the future
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • Green CircleGreen Circle Posts: 5,192
    Dear Future..

    If you could let me know if I am going to have the latest model spacecar
    or will be stuck with a 14 year old spacecar? that would be great.

    thanks

    GC
    "...And I fight back in my mind. Never lets me be right.
    I got memories. I got shit so much it don't show."
  • drivingrldrivingrl Posts: 1,448
    Dear Landlords,

    There is a leak coming from the bathroom above me. I know you don't believe me when I tell you that, but there is. Stop saying things like, "Maybe the lady above you threw water on the ground," or, "Maybe her toilet overflowed." The damage to my bathroom ceiling (and walls) is from repeated exposure to water.

    I Hate You,
    drivingrl

    PS: You're clearly stupid.
    drivingrl: "Will I ever get to meet Gwen Stefani?"
    kevinbeetle: "Yes. When her career washes up and her and Gavin move to Galveston, you will meet her at Hot Topic shopping for a Japanese cheerleader outfit.

    Next!"
  • mickeyratmickeyrat Posts: 38,422
    Dear Future..

    If you could let me know if I am going to have the latest model spacecar
    or will be stuck with a 14 year old spacecar? that would be great.

    thanks

    GC
    Dear GC,

    Sadly it will be a 20 yr old spacecar.

    Sorry,
    The Future
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • peacefrompaulpeacefrompaul Posts: 25,293
    mickeyrat wrote:
    rollings wrote:
    yellowwho wrote:
    Dear What appears to be a deliciously fresh and perfectly ripened banana,

    Why have you lied and tricked me into believing that just maybe, judging by your outside appearance that you won't let me down again when I proceed to peel your beautifully colored yellow skin back only for you to reveal your less than perfect core ?

    This has been going on for the past several years, and I thought I would have stopped this way sooner than now. Whats the deal ? Is something going on in the tropics ? Is it an environmental issue that needs to be addressed ? This has been driving me crazy and its been on my mind quite often,so much so that it has turned into an anxiety issue that usually starts around 10 am ( I usually eat lunch around 11 or 12) and continues for a few hours after as well usually in the form of anger.

    I'd really like to know, because , I really didn't want to say this but I never thought I would hate a fruit as much as I hate you !

    Signed,

    This has to be a conspiracy

    P.S.

    just so you know , I will still continue to eat you fully knowing that I will be disappointed

    I have never peeled a nice-looking banana that revealed anything other than a nice banana inside.

    Where do you buy your bad bananas from?
    they are picked way before they should be in order to satisfy demand. gassed with a benign gas to ripen artificially. Just before yellow while still greenish is the best flavor. once they hit full bright yellow the flavors gone. Usually eat one every morning.

    Fascinating... that's also never happened to me.
  • Green CircleGreen Circle Posts: 5,192
    mickeyrat wrote:
    Dear Future..

    If you could let me know if I am going to have the latest model spacecar
    or will be stuck with a 14 year old spacecar? that would be great.

    thanks

    GC
    Dear GC,

    Sadly it will be a 20 yr old spacecar.

    Sorry,
    The Future


    :wtf:
    "...And I fight back in my mind. Never lets me be right.
    I got memories. I got shit so much it don't show."
  • peacefrompaulpeacefrompaul Posts: 25,293
    A couple people did not
  • rick1zoo2rick1zoo2 Posts: 12,632
    I did. but it was way too long to read...
  • kw18kw18 Posts: 3,909
    A couple people did not
    rick1zoo2 wrote:
    I did. but it was way too long to read...

    If it was important enough, they would have called.
    "Where's KW?"
    "Let's check Idaho."
  • rick1zoo2rick1zoo2 Posts: 12,632
    kw18 wrote:
    A couple people did not
    rick1zoo2 wrote:
    I did. but it was way too long to read...

    If it was important enough, they would have called.

    was that them? I did not answer...
  • kw18kw18 Posts: 3,909
    rick1zoo2 wrote:
    kw18 wrote:
    A couple people did not
    rick1zoo2 wrote:
    I did. but it was way too long to read...

    If it was important enough, they would have called.

    was that them? I did not answer...

    I never answer. If it's important enough, they would leave a message.
    "Where's KW?"
    "Let's check Idaho."
  • rick1zoo2rick1zoo2 Posts: 12,632
    kw18 wrote:
    I never answer. If it's important enough, they would leave a message.

    leave a message?? oh, no, I am not falling for that...
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