Man Laws

The Fixer

1 - You can only talk about your fantasy football teams with members of your league. Same goes for NCAA bracket pools. No one cares. Stop trying to tell me about things I could care less about. the minute I get stuck in a conversation where someone brings up their fantasy team I stop paying attention to them and focus on how I'm gonna get out of the conversation.

2 - You shouldn't be allowed to bring signs or baseball gloves to sporting events once you're old enough to shave. Once you reach this age you shouldn't ask for autographs either.

3 - No man should EVER drink an alcoholic beverage with a straw. For whatever reason non-alcoholic beverages with straws are acceptable.

4 - No white sunglasses, belts, pants, or socks. Not good looks

what other man laws should be implemented?

mookeywrench

Nothing in the history of the world has ever been "fierce" or "fabulous"

BinauralJam

mookeywrench wrote:

Nothing in the history of the world has ever been "fierce" or "fabulous"

jshin

Wait... White socks are out?

comebackgirl

Men never seem to use umbrellas either unless they're wearing a suit.

12 weeks of immortality

comebackgirl wrote:

Men never seem to use umbrellas either unless they're wearing a suit.

I used an umbrella last week! but it didn't feel right...

SCMike10

3 - No man should EVER drink an alcoholic beverage with a straw. For whatever reason non-alcoholic beverages with straws are acceptable.


I had three wisdom teeth (two of which were inpacted) removed on Monday. Can I get a pass on this one so I can drink beer during tonight's UFC fight?

12 weeks of immortality

I had three wisdom teeth (two of which were inpacted) removed on Monday. Can I get a pass on this one so I can drink beer during tonight's UFC fight?[/quote]


"you know the law. You gotta do, what you gotta do."

BinauralJam

SCMike10 wrote:

3 - No man should EVER drink an alcoholic beverage with a straw. For whatever reason non-alcoholic beverages with straws are acceptable.


I had three wisdom teeth (two of which were inpacted) removed on Monday. Can I get a pass on this one so I can drink beer during tonight's UFC fight?

actually that might tear the stitchs, your better off drinkin normally.

jshin

Wisdom teeth?..UFC fight!?.. Nice try!

Claireack

I like men especially my husband. Is that a law?

catefrances

Claireack wrote:

I like men especially my husband. Is that a law?

only if you want us all to 'like' your husband too.

Claireack

catefrances wrote:

Claireack wrote:

I like men especially my husband. Is that a law?

only if you want us all to 'like' your husband too.

Well you can do, he's rather nice. Well I like him

loadedgun

Men do not talk to each other in the bathroom. Eye contact is forbidden. If eye contact does occur, the only acceptable acknowledgement is a head nod.

mookeywrench

loadedgun wrote:

Men do not talk to each other in the bathroom. Eye contact is forbidden. If eye contact does occur, the only acceptable acknowledgement is a head nod.

I'm going to Amend this law:

Additionally, no man shall ever go to the bathroom simultaneously with their wingmen. A minimum of 120 seconds must pass before any wingmen enter the same bathroom.

81

When using the stool, always leave an empty stall between you and the other guy

don't schedule your wedding on ohio state michigan sat

haffajappa

Never stop and ask directions...
Or look at directions during assembly of something.

Although I'm a girl and I'm guilty on both charges...
...mostly because I don't need to

SCMike10

As I am bound by Man Law- I am drinking sans straw...(damn you alcohol problem!!!!).

BinauralJam

When you get into a drinking contest, win or lose,whoever still consious is responsible for getting the other guy home, no mater how much the cab ride cost, or how heavy your freinds is. ( 5'10 160 pound chinese man may not sound heavy, but when pasted out, Good Lord)

loadedgun

No man shall ever wax part of his body, regardless of the reasoning.

Phantom Pain

You may fart in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.