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Man Laws

The FixerThe Fixer Posts: 12,837
edited September 2010 in All Encompassing Trip
1 - You can only talk about your fantasy football teams with members of your league. Same goes for NCAA bracket pools. No one cares. Stop trying to tell me about things I could care less about. the minute I get stuck in a conversation where someone brings up their fantasy team I stop paying attention to them and focus on how I'm gonna get out of the conversation.

2 - You shouldn't be allowed to bring signs or baseball gloves to sporting events once you're old enough to shave. Once you reach this age you shouldn't ask for autographs either.

3 - No man should EVER drink an alcoholic beverage with a straw. For whatever reason non-alcoholic beverages with straws are acceptable.

4 - No white sunglasses, belts, pants, or socks. Not good looks

what other man laws should be implemented?
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • mookeywrenchmookeywrench Posts: 5,940
    Nothing in the history of the world has ever been "fierce" or "fabulous"
    350x700px-LL-d2f49cb4_vinyl-needle-scu-e1356666258495.jpeg
  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    mookeywrench wrote:
    Nothing in the history of the world has ever been "fierce" or "fabulous"


    :lol::lol::lol:
  • jshinjshin Posts: 1,759
    Wait... White socks are out?
    I ain't got no fly'n shoes..




  • comebackgirlcomebackgirl Posts: 9,885
    Men never seem to use umbrellas either unless they're wearing a suit.
    tumblr_mg4nc33pIX1s1mie8o1_400.gif

    "I need your strength for me to be strong...I need your love to feel loved"
  • 12 weeks of immortality12 weeks of immortality Posts: 67
    comebackgirl wrote:
    Men never seem to use umbrellas either unless they're wearing a suit.

    I used an umbrella last week! but it didn't feel right...
    PJ - Roskilde Festival - June 30th 2000
    PJ - Heineken Jammin' Festival - July 6 2010
    PJ - Oslo, Norway - July 9 2012
    SG - Oslo, Norway - October 17 1996
  • SCMike10SCMike10 Posts: 195
    3 - No man should EVER drink an alcoholic beverage with a straw. For whatever reason non-alcoholic beverages with straws are acceptable.


    I had three wisdom teeth (two of which were inpacted) removed on Monday. Can I get a pass on this one so I can drink beer during tonight's UFC fight?
    Irvine Meadows - Sep 13, 1992
    Tweeter Center - Jul 02, 2003
    Tweeter Center - Jul 03, 2003
    Tweeter Center - Jul 11, 2003
    Fleet Center - Sep 28, 2004
    Dodge Music Center - Jun 27, 2008
    Tweeter Center - Jun 28, 2008
    Tweeter Center - Jun 30, 2008
    ALL FOUR 09 PHILLY SHOWS!!
  • 12 weeks of immortality12 weeks of immortality Posts: 67
    I had three wisdom teeth (two of which were inpacted) removed on Monday. Can I get a pass on this one so I can drink beer during tonight's UFC fight?[/quote]

    :lol:
    "you know the law. You gotta do, what you gotta do."
    PJ - Roskilde Festival - June 30th 2000
    PJ - Heineken Jammin' Festival - July 6 2010
    PJ - Oslo, Norway - July 9 2012
    SG - Oslo, Norway - October 17 1996
  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    SCMike10 wrote:
    3 - No man should EVER drink an alcoholic beverage with a straw. For whatever reason non-alcoholic beverages with straws are acceptable.


    I had three wisdom teeth (two of which were inpacted) removed on Monday. Can I get a pass on this one so I can drink beer during tonight's UFC fight?

    actually that might tear the stitchs, your better off drinkin normally.
  • jshinjshin Posts: 1,759
    Wisdom teeth?..UFC fight!?.. Nice try!
    I ain't got no fly'n shoes..




  • ClaireackClaireack Posts: 13,561
    I like men especially my husband. Is that a law?
    <a href="http://s952.photobucket.com/albums/ae8/catkinson_2009/?action=view&current=domo.jpg&quot; target="_blank"><img src="http://i952.photobucket.com/albums/ae8/catkinson_2009/domo.jpg&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
  • catefrancescatefrances Posts: 29,003
    Claireack wrote:
    I like men especially my husband. Is that a law?


    only if you want us all to 'like' your husband too. ;)
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • ClaireackClaireack Posts: 13,561
    catefrances wrote:
    Claireack wrote:
    I like men especially my husband. Is that a law?


    only if you want us all to 'like' your husband too. ;)

    :D Well you can do, he's rather nice. Well I like him :D
    <a href="http://s952.photobucket.com/albums/ae8/catkinson_2009/?action=view&current=domo.jpg&quot; target="_blank"><img src="http://i952.photobucket.com/albums/ae8/catkinson_2009/domo.jpg&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
  • loadedgunloadedgun Indiana Posts: 1,390
    Men do not talk to each other in the bathroom. Eye contact is forbidden. If eye contact does occur, the only acceptable acknowledgement is a head nod.
    Midwest. Indy/Lafayette.
  • mookeywrenchmookeywrench Posts: 5,940
    loadedgun wrote:
    Men do not talk to each other in the bathroom. Eye contact is forbidden. If eye contact does occur, the only acceptable acknowledgement is a head nod.

    I'm going to Amend this law:

    Additionally, no man shall ever go to the bathroom simultaneously with their wingmen. A minimum of 120 seconds must pass before any wingmen enter the same bathroom.
    350x700px-LL-d2f49cb4_vinyl-needle-scu-e1356666258495.jpeg
  • 8181 Needing a ride to Forest Hills and a ounce of weed. Please inquire within. Thanks. Or not. Posts: 58,276
    When using the stool, always leave an empty stall between you and the other guy

    don't schedule your wedding on ohio state michigan sat
    81 is now off the air

    Off_Air.jpg
  • haffajappahaffajappa British Columbia Posts: 5,955
    Never stop and ask directions...
    Or look at directions during assembly of something.

    Although I'm a girl and I'm guilty on both charges...
    ...mostly because I don't need to 8-)
    live pearl jam is best pearl jam
  • SCMike10SCMike10 Posts: 195
    As I am bound by Man Law- I am drinking sans straw...(damn you alcohol problem!!!!).
    Irvine Meadows - Sep 13, 1992
    Tweeter Center - Jul 02, 2003
    Tweeter Center - Jul 03, 2003
    Tweeter Center - Jul 11, 2003
    Fleet Center - Sep 28, 2004
    Dodge Music Center - Jun 27, 2008
    Tweeter Center - Jun 28, 2008
    Tweeter Center - Jun 30, 2008
    ALL FOUR 09 PHILLY SHOWS!!
  • BinauralJamBinauralJam Posts: 14,158
    When you get into a drinking contest, win or lose,whoever still consious is responsible for getting the other guy home, no mater how much the cab ride cost, or how heavy your freinds is. ( 5'10 160 pound chinese man may not sound heavy, but when pasted out, Good Lord)
  • loadedgunloadedgun Indiana Posts: 1,390
    No man shall ever wax part of his body, regardless of the reasoning.
    Midwest. Indy/Lafayette.
  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    You may fart in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • jamminpearlsjamminpearls Posts: 7,078
    The Fixer wrote:
    1 - You can only talk about your fantasy football teams with members of your league. Same goes for NCAA bracket pools. No one cares. Stop trying to tell me about things I could care less about. the minute I get stuck in a conversation where someone brings up their fantasy team I stop paying attention to them and focus on how I'm gonna get out of the conversation.

    Well i knew u were good for at least 1 wrong statement :)
    Go Birds!!!!
  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    jamminpearls wrote:
    The Fixer wrote:
    1 - You can only talk about your fantasy football teams with members of your league. Same goes for NCAA bracket pools. No one cares. Stop trying to tell me about things I could care less about. the minute I get stuck in a conversation where someone brings up their fantasy team I stop paying attention to them and focus on how I'm gonna get out of the conversation.

    Well i knew u were good for at least 1 wrong statement :)

    Fixer Law : He's never wrong
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • jamminpearlsjamminpearls Posts: 7,078
    Phantom Pain wrote:
    jamminpearls wrote:
    The Fixer wrote:
    1 - You can only talk about your fantasy football teams with members of your league. Same goes for NCAA bracket pools. No one cares. Stop trying to tell me about things I could care less about. the minute I get stuck in a conversation where someone brings up their fantasy team I stop paying attention to them and focus on how I'm gonna get out of the conversation.

    Well i knew u were good for at least 1 wrong statement :)

    Fixer Law : He's never wrong
    Lol, well he said were not making the playoffs so i guess theres no point of watching baseball this year.
    Go Birds!!!!
  • Phantom PainPhantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    jamminpearls wrote:
    Lol, well he said were not making the playoffs so i guess theres no point of watching baseball this year.

    He made a few of those statements about the Fly Guys last year but I forgave him
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • dcfaithfuldcfaithful Posts: 13,076
    The Fixer wrote:
    4 - No white sunglasses, belts, pants, or socks. Not good looks

    I agree with everything except the socks....they're concealed more than half the time anyways.
    7/2/06 - Denver, CO
    6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
    8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
    9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
    9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
    9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
  • Cliffy6745Cliffy6745 Posts: 33,926
    Talking about your fantasy team to people outside of your league is brutal. Why would I give a flying fuck about your fantasy football team? This is quite possibly the lowest form of conversation.
  • julesandianjulesandian Posts: 487
    No matter how complicated the machine/mechanism, Man must open it and have a look to check if maybe he can mend it before diagnosing that it's fucked. We are Man, hear us roar. ;)
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    The Fixer wrote:
    4 - No white sunglasses, belts, pants, or socks. Not good looks
    I disagree about the white pants...particularly when EV wears them.
  • mickeyratmickeyrat Posts: 41,046
    Jeanwah wrote:
    The Fixer wrote:
    4 - No white sunglasses, belts, pants, or socks. Not good looks
    I disagree about the white pants...particularly when EV wears them.
    didnt think it would take long for this exact post!! :lol:
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  • ClaireackClaireack Posts: 13,561
    mickeyrat wrote:
    Jeanwah wrote:
    The Fixer wrote:
    4 - No white sunglasses, belts, pants, or socks. Not good looks
    I disagree about the white pants...particularly when EV wears them.
    didnt think it would take long for this exact post!! :lol:

    It's would be passable for EV to wear white pants (at a push) but not the ones that have gone greyish after a few washes.
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