PJ fans in 12 step Recovery

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  • HughFreakingDillon
    HughFreakingDillon Winnipeg Posts: 39,449
    mickeyrat said:
    HughFreakingDillon said:
    that's it. I've had it. 
    explain?
    done with booze. my weekly intake has exploded over the last couple months. no reason as to why. I don't drink because of depression or stress or anything. it's more out of habit and boredom. my wife and i used to party every weekend with friends or just ourselves, but then we had kids, she stopped, I didn't. well I did for a while when the kids were young. there was no time for that. but as the kids grew older I started to get bored and, as an introvert, don't go out with friends much. So my partying is confined to my own house. so my weekly ritual is having a few thursday, get blitzed friday and sometime saturdays. the main issues I have from it are:

    -the amount of money that I spend on it
    -the health factor. not just booze. but it inevitably leads to poor eating choices. bags of chips, fast food. just garbage. and my weight has ballooned out of control as a result. 
    -my wife hates it. it has taken a toll on our marriage. 
    -i don't want my kids growing up only knowing their dad getting loaded on weekends. my 13 year old has made the odd comment, and I don't like it. 
    -sometimes if I'm hung over, I'm not enjoying the day. I am wishing it over with. I can't wait to just "get through". the odd weekends where I am not hung over have felt like another world. 

    I just don't have an off switch. Never have. I just drink until it's gone, or I've gone way overboard. 

    I spoke to my GP about this some time ago. When I told him how much I drank (usually a 26 of rye per weekend) he told me, "well, that's about average, you're just doing it in two sittings, where most people do it in 7". 

    But this past weekend I blasted through a 40, a 26, a 2 litre of wine, and a few beers. that's NOT normal for me. So that's it. I can't have it getting any worse than that. 

    I don't know how I'm alive after all that. 

    I just want to go back to being a normal person that gets up at a normal hour on a saturday morning and doesn't have to "get through" the day. 
    Hugh Freaking Dillon is currently out of the office, returning sometime in the fall




  • mickeyrat
    mickeyrat Posts: 44,315
    edited November 2019
    HughFreakingDillon said:
    mickeyrat said:
    HughFreakingDillon said:
    that's it. I've had it. 
    explain?
    done with booze. my weekly intake has exploded over the last couple months. no reason as to why. I don't drink because of depression or stress or anything. it's more out of habit and boredom. my wife and i used to party every weekend with friends or just ourselves, but then we had kids, she stopped, I didn't. well I did for a while when the kids were young. there was no time for that. but as the kids grew older I started to get bored and, as an introvert, don't go out with friends much. So my partying is confined to my own house. so my weekly ritual is having a few thursday, get blitzed friday and sometime saturdays. the main issues I have from it are:

    -the amount of money that I spend on it
    -the health factor. not just booze. but it inevitably leads to poor eating choices. bags of chips, fast food. just garbage. and my weight has ballooned out of control as a result. 
    -my wife hates it. it has taken a toll on our marriage. 
    -i don't want my kids growing up only knowing their dad getting loaded on weekends. my 13 year old has made the odd comment, and I don't like it. 
    -sometimes if I'm hung over, I'm not enjoying the day. I am wishing it over with. I can't wait to just "get through". the odd weekends where I am not hung over have felt like another world. 

    I just don't have an off switch. Never have. I just drink until it's gone, or I've gone way overboard. 

    I spoke to my GP about this some time ago. When I told him how much I drank (usually a 26 of rye per weekend) he told me, "well, that's about average, you're just doing it in two sittings, where most people do it in 7". 

    But this past weekend I blasted through a 40, a 26, a 2 litre of wine, and a few beers. that's NOT normal for me. So that's it. I can't have it getting any worse than that. 

    I don't know how I'm alive after all that. 

    I just want to go back to being a normal person that gets up at a normal hour on a saturday morning and doesn't have to "get through" the day. 
    I kinda like your GP......

    so, according to the AA book, you would classify as either a heavy drinker, able to stop or moderate with sufficient reason to do so. Or an alcoholic who is compelled to drink regardless of effort at stopping, one who may be able to stop or moderate for a time but generally returns to drinking for any or no reason at all.

    I sincerely hope its the former for you. In either case, there is support to be had. Here of course and elsewhere as well from a variety of sources, AA being one of them if an alcoholic. 


    whatever the course you take, the desired result is the same. To go to bed sober on a daily basis. One day at a time.
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • vogonpoetbythelake
    vogonpoetbythelake Posts: 2,146
    Great dialogue really appreciate all of you and your honesty...thank you...be well!
  • HughFreakingDillon
    HughFreakingDillon Winnipeg Posts: 39,449
    mickeyrat said:
    HughFreakingDillon said:
    mickeyrat said:
    HughFreakingDillon said:
    that's it. I've had it. 
    explain?
    done with booze. my weekly intake has exploded over the last couple months. no reason as to why. I don't drink because of depression or stress or anything. it's more out of habit and boredom. my wife and i used to party every weekend with friends or just ourselves, but then we had kids, she stopped, I didn't. well I did for a while when the kids were young. there was no time for that. but as the kids grew older I started to get bored and, as an introvert, don't go out with friends much. So my partying is confined to my own house. so my weekly ritual is having a few thursday, get blitzed friday and sometime saturdays. the main issues I have from it are:

    -the amount of money that I spend on it
    -the health factor. not just booze. but it inevitably leads to poor eating choices. bags of chips, fast food. just garbage. and my weight has ballooned out of control as a result. 
    -my wife hates it. it has taken a toll on our marriage. 
    -i don't want my kids growing up only knowing their dad getting loaded on weekends. my 13 year old has made the odd comment, and I don't like it. 
    -sometimes if I'm hung over, I'm not enjoying the day. I am wishing it over with. I can't wait to just "get through". the odd weekends where I am not hung over have felt like another world. 

    I just don't have an off switch. Never have. I just drink until it's gone, or I've gone way overboard. 

    I spoke to my GP about this some time ago. When I told him how much I drank (usually a 26 of rye per weekend) he told me, "well, that's about average, you're just doing it in two sittings, where most people do it in 7". 

    But this past weekend I blasted through a 40, a 26, a 2 litre of wine, and a few beers. that's NOT normal for me. So that's it. I can't have it getting any worse than that. 

    I don't know how I'm alive after all that. 

    I just want to go back to being a normal person that gets up at a normal hour on a saturday morning and doesn't have to "get through" the day. 
    I kinda like your GP......

    so, according to the AA book, you would classify as either a heavy drinker, able to stop or moderate with sufficient reason to do so. Or an alcoholic who is compelled to drink regardless of effort at stopping, one who may be able to stop or moderate for a time but generally returns to drinking for any or no reason at all.

    I sincerely hope its the former for you. In either case, there is support to be had. Here of course and elsewhere as well from a variety of sources, AA being one of them if an alcoholic. 


    whatever the course you take, the desired result is the same. To go to bed sober on a daily basis. One day at a time.
    pretty sure I'm the former. Ultimately I'd love to be able to have a glass of wine or a beer with dinner, which I often do without issue. it's just on the weekends where I "face no consequences" (like having to go to work the next day) where my switch becomes non-existent. If I have an early morning function with my kids or family or whatever on a saturday, I have no issue with not drinking. it's just when there's nothing to worry about that I do this. Which, these days, with my kids being a little older, is almost always the case. 
    Hugh Freaking Dillon is currently out of the office, returning sometime in the fall




  • lastexitlondon
    lastexitlondon Posts: 14,876
    More  power to you.  Im still wishing from a far that i could  stop.
    I hope you can do what you need.  And i believe you are not in too deep .


    this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
  • Wobbie
    Wobbie Posts: 31,244
    good luck, Hugh!

    Thanksgiving may or may not be a challenge for me....it’s always been my favorite boozy holiday.
    If I had known then what I know now...

    Vegas 93, Vegas 98, Vegas 00 (10 year show), Vegas 03, Vegas 06
    VIC 07
    EV LA1 08
    Seattle1 09, Seattle2 09, Salt Lake 09, LA4 09
    Columbus 10
    EV LA 11
    Vancouver 11
    Missoula 12
    Portland 13, Spokane 13
    St. Paul 14, Denver 14
    Philly I & II, 16
    Denver 22
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    Haha....every holiday was my favorite boozy holiday.  In fact, who needed the holidays for a reason to begin with? :lol:

    Challenges, whether conquering them or even trying to, have served my liberation well.

    ...but not so much my liver-ation :rofl:
  • mickeyrat
    mickeyrat Posts: 44,315
    hedonist said:
    Haha....every holiday was my favorite boozy holiday.  In fact, who needed the holidays for a reason to begin with? :lol:

    Challenges, whether conquering them or even trying to, have served my liberation well.

    ...but not so much my liver-ation :rofl:
    any day that ended in Y was sufficient......
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • mickeyrat
    mickeyrat Posts: 44,315
    Prayers please for my former wife Deanna and her husband Tim.  Deanna's mom Lecia passed this morning.
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
  • Fifthelement
    Fifthelement Lotusland Posts: 6,965
    mickeyrat said:
    Prayers please for my former wife Deanna and her husband Tim.  Deanna's mom Lecia passed this morning.
    My condolences to all who knew and loved Lecia.
    "What the CANUCK happened?!? - Esquimalt Barber Shop
  • Matts3221
    Matts3221 Posts: 658
    mickeyrat said:
    Prayers please for my former wife Deanna and her husband Tim.  Deanna's mom Lecia passed this morning.

    Very sorry to hear this news.
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    I'm sorry, mickey.
  • deadendp
    deadendp Northeast Ohio Posts: 10,434
    So very sorry to hear about the loss, M.
    2014: Cincinnati
    2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
  • Wobbie
    Wobbie Posts: 31,244
    it's noon. on any other Thanksgiving, I'd be well on my way!
    If I had known then what I know now...

    Vegas 93, Vegas 98, Vegas 00 (10 year show), Vegas 03, Vegas 06
    VIC 07
    EV LA1 08
    Seattle1 09, Seattle2 09, Salt Lake 09, LA4 09
    Columbus 10
    EV LA 11
    Vancouver 11
    Missoula 12
    Portland 13, Spokane 13
    St. Paul 14, Denver 14
    Philly I & II, 16
    Denver 22
  • HughFreakingDillon
    HughFreakingDillon Winnipeg Posts: 39,449
    gotta admit, I'm not looking forward to this weekend. it's not even a holiday weekend here. but I don't know what I'll do with myself., I have a usual routine, and I'll be honest, I do it because I like it, not as any type of escape. weekends are going to be fucking boring now. 
    Hugh Freaking Dillon is currently out of the office, returning sometime in the fall




  • Wobbie
    Wobbie Posts: 31,244
    some of my reasons for quitting are the same as Hugh’s; some not...

    money wasn’t an issue, nor were kids (I don’t have any)....I do kind of wonder about my BIL, tho....he’s a happy drunk but his kids see him drinking all the time. as far as the wife, my drinking was only a problem maybe 5% of the time (if that).

    my main reasons were hangovers, leading to wasted days, and memory blackouts of the “night before,”

    hang in there, Hugh....your life will be better w/o booze.
    If I had known then what I know now...

    Vegas 93, Vegas 98, Vegas 00 (10 year show), Vegas 03, Vegas 06
    VIC 07
    EV LA1 08
    Seattle1 09, Seattle2 09, Salt Lake 09, LA4 09
    Columbus 10
    EV LA 11
    Vancouver 11
    Missoula 12
    Portland 13, Spokane 13
    St. Paul 14, Denver 14
    Philly I & II, 16
    Denver 22
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    Eighteen months ago I was in ICU, fresh off a blood transfusion.  Detoxed physically, though unaware.  Overwhelming fear in moments of (silent) lucidity...thinking of the grim fucking reaper...how will I ever adjust to living without alcohol...a goddamn weakling at 91 pounds.

    I feel so much stronger, mentally, than before.  More in control, more free, and most importantly, honest with myself - even when the my truth hurts.

    I'll always be as proud of this achievement as much as I am, and probably always will be, cognizant of the fact that much of this is by my own doing.  I was quite angry and disappointed with myself for awhile...some of it still lingers.

    Still, I am alcohol-free :peace:
  • oftenreading
    oftenreading Victoria, BC Posts: 12,856
    hedonist said:
    Eighteen months ago I was in ICU, fresh off a blood transfusion.  Detoxed physically, though unaware.  Overwhelming fear in moments of (silent) lucidity...thinking of the grim fucking reaper...how will I ever adjust to living without alcohol...a goddamn weakling at 91 pounds.

    I feel so much stronger, mentally, than before.  More in control, more free, and most importantly, honest with myself - even when the my truth hurts.

    I'll always be as proud of this achievement as much as I am, and probably always will be, cognizant of the fact that much of this is by my own doing.  I was quite angry and disappointed with myself for awhile...some of it still lingers.

    Still, I am alcohol-free :peace:
    Alcohol-free but still full of spirit ;) , and overflowing with love and humour :hug:  You are a miracle, hedo. 
    my small self... like a book amongst the many on a shelf
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    Thank you for being among my beloveds who were and are there for me :kiss:
  • mickeyrat
    mickeyrat Posts: 44,315
    Hedonist,


    FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC......


    truth denied is the killer. truth acknowledged helps us grow....
    _____________________________________SIGNATURE________________________________________________

    Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
    you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
    memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
    another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14

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