gay people raising children

angelica · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

the problem of not being capable enough to give birth to a kid between two women or 2 men IS a problem that coms wit homosexuality, as much as fucking up one's lungs is a problem created by smoking.

I agree wholeheartedly. Therefore I fully support such couples in using their mental and emotional faculties to the fullest in coming up with the solutions to their problem that best serve them, given their other choices and consequences. I furthermore support them looking far and wide for resources that help them define their purposes and what they choose regarding acquiring children. And I support them utilising any resources available to the best of their ability, knowing that when they take on the precious trust of raising a child whatever way, they will have the strongest foundation of love and resources to raise that child as healthy as is possible.

CenterCity · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

the problem of not being capable enough to give birth to a kid between two women or 2 men IS a problem that coms wit homosexuality, as much as fucking up one's lungs is a problem created by smoking.

its not a problem though.....not to be able to give birth, that say man and woman did in the beginning of time.
science is changing that, we need to be able to roll with these changes, or otherwise we'll just screw ourselves over.
if we've been doing science since the beginning of time, you know each step takes us closer to creation.
especially in this day and age, we're just scared of opening up more, because we don't want to let go of what we know, and we're afraid of the uncertainity that change brings.....this is so fundamentally about that.
i'm so unconditional about whatever i learn, no if's ands or buts, but no, this can't apply to that, or no....but still. do you know what i mean?

CenterCity · June 2006

it seems most of us lack confidence in knowing that we can roll with the changes. sigh.

IndianSummer · June 2006

angelica wrote:

And I support them utilising any resources available to the best of their ability,

at the risk of toying with the child's future and upbringing???

who amongst us would like to be such a child??

CenterCity · June 2006

angelica wrote:

I agree wholeheartedly. Therefore I fully support such couples in using their mental and emotional faculties to the fullest in coming up with the solutions to their problem that best serve them, given their other choices and consequences. I furthermore support them looking far and wide for resources that help them define their purposes and what they choose regarding acquiring children. And I support them utilising any resources available to the best of their ability, knowing that when they take on the precious trust of raising a child whatever way, they will have the strongest foundation of love and resources to raise that child as healthy as is possible.

its such a give and take relationship though. like in any relationship.

angelica · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

at the risk of toying with the child's future and upbringing???

who amongst us would like to be such a child??

The problem is that 95% of us ARE such children!

95% of us in the western world are considered psychologically messed up. We were all born into families with challenges and problems. Many of us choose to have children and "toy" with them, and continue the cycles of our own dysfunction. It's human nature. It's pretty clear that by virtue of being human, homosexuals are afforded that choice just like the rest of us. I, personally, would prefer to be part of the environmental aspect of evolving life constructively, and supporting humans and making the world a better place. I also choose not the be part of "the problem" with judgment, blame and perpetuating stigma and stereotypes because I have enough knowledge to know that my blame, stigma, stereotypes and ideas of controlling others are about my own self.

Milhouse VanHouten · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

before that tell me what the hell does same sex marriage have to do with progress?

Same sex marriage would be looked upon by some as progress because it would give gays the opportunity to be recognized by the state as committed couples, and they'd receive the benefits that come with that.

IndianSummer · June 2006

angelica wrote:

The problem is that 95% of us ARE such children!

95% of us in the western world are considered psychologically messed up. We were all born into families with challenges and problems. Many of us choose to have children and "toy" with them, and continue the cycles of our own dysfunction. It's human nature.

thats a very pertinent point you raise.
i'd like to start a new thread about that.

check out the moving train

angelica · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

thats a very pertinent point you raise.
i'd like to start a new thread about that.

Thanks.

check out the moving train

I'll meet you there.

pearl jamm_n 4-life · June 2006

this is an obsurd topic. how about the kids raising kids, or lack there-of for a better term. how about the sad neglected children of all of these straight parents. kids are a reflection of their parents. oh yeah, and how about all of these kids who are without sufficient living opportunities, whom may desire the chance at a real family environment regardless of the sexual preferences. if anything, gay individuals possess a strength and the ability to persevere with a heightened sense of resilience. Due mostly in part to the shit they have to deal with day in and day from all of those individuals who are homophobic due to their own insecurities. Sexual preference does not factor into what does or does not make a good parent. Its love, care, and a sincere understanding to the quintessential value that children are. Taking their needs into consideraton first. not their own selfish desires. Lets get real here, children are fucking up by the thousands on a daily basis. not because they are bad kids, but because their parents fucked up somewhere. you know the old saying, negative attention is better than no attention at all. well, this applies to kids, especially in situations of neglect. if an individaul is going to give a child the chance they truly deserve in life. then why should i care what their sexual preference is?

angelica · June 2006

pearl jamm'n 4-life wrote:

if anything, gay individuals possess a strength and the ability to persevere with a heightened sense of resilience. Due mostly in part to the shit they have to deal with day in and day from all of those individuals who are homophobic due to their own insecurities.

I agree.

I base this agreement on the fact that I come from two stigmatised groupings of parents. I was a "kid" having a kid at eighteen and was stigmatised and stereotyped for that. Then I developed two major mental illnesses. There are very few conditions that are considered worse alongside parenting than mental illness and homosexuality. It was the illnesses, stigmas, stereotyping and other unusual abuse I had to endure daily that caused me to grow and stretch beyond average in my own child-rearing practices. I've learned to be healthy far beyond many people I know. My children have an unusual amount of compassion, intelligence and psychological health, particularly if you consider what they've gone through.

It's my cockroach evolution theory--aka: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

IndianSummer · June 2006

angelica wrote:

I'll meet you there.

why ??;)

_Crazy_Mary_ · June 2006

Here are my thoughts on gay people raising children - I think it's great. In many cases these will be adopted children. And I believe that people who adopt children really love kids. It is a long process to have to go through.

angelica · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

why ??;)

I was meaning I'd see you over there.

IndianSummer · June 2006

angelica wrote:

I was meaning I'd see you over there.

i was meaning to point out the name of the thread to you, which incidentally is called "why".:D

angelica · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

i was meaning to point out the name of the thread to you, which incidentally is called "why".:D

haha, that's funny.

decides2dream · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

er... thats the point. half the child WONT be theirs. either someone else ovaries or someone else's sperm.

might as well have a fully adopted kid.

why?

what difference does that make, anbd why is it yours, or anyone else's call to make? there are PLENTY of hetero couples who have families...and the children within are NOT from both parents. *shocking* some are children of divorce with remarriages affecting who they live with, some children actually have parents who die before they reach 18...some live with no parents per se, but with grandparents or aunts/uncles....and yes, even hetero couples do sometimes utilize sperm implantation or a surrogate, etc... b/c the couple together can't have a child that is BOTH of theirs.

what i find most interesting is the fact that you start a thread, don't like the answers..sure, it meandered much, but with such a topic it is bound to, and it wouldn't be pages and pages long otherwise if we ONLY covered answering yes/no towards belief of homosexuals raising children...complain about the answetrs and meandering...and basically take issue with those who disagree. haha. so much for discussion. if you have it all figured out, why ask for opinions? obviously, many of us do not feel the same as you do...and honestly, many of us just don't feel the need to 'tell' homosexuals, or anyone for that matter, how they can or cannot have a family. whethere hetero or homosexual...ANY couple that can meet the criteria needed for any assisted reproduction and/or adoption...should be afforded either choice...as sexual orientation has ZERO to do with being a good parent and uspportive/loving home. in fact, sexual orientation has precious little to do with most things, and what it has to do with is, or should be, completely private....none of it has anything to do with much in life.

merlin401 · June 2006

IndianSummer wrote:

i am not opposed to gays and lesbians getting married and enjoying the rights that married folk have.

having children is not a married person's "right." Its the opportunity they have because of their heterosexual relationship....

If you want the natural satisfaction of raising a child, then be in a natural relationship.

jeffbr · June 2006

merlin401 wrote:

If you want the natural satisfaction of raising a child, then be in a natural relationship.

So infertile hetero couples shouldn't do something unnatural like adopting?

merlin401 · June 2006

jeffbr wrote:

So infertile hetero couples shouldn't do something unnatural like adopting?

completely different... thats their body malfunctioning. Its not choosing a lifestyle that will never naturally produce a child. Why can't I, as a single man, adopt a girl to raise? Same thing... its not going to happen, nor should it, no matter how much I wish for it to happen.

gay people raising children

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