so what you do in this situation
GreenTeaDisease
Posts: 3,359
so as I posted before my friends are trying to get me to meet guys and date even though I don't want to (well I mean I do want to some day, but there's no way I could handle the stress of dating right now when I'm literally the fattest I've ever been in my life). So anyway, I was at my favorite bar saturday night with my 2 friends. we were sitting in the corner and I had my back to the bar. all of a sudden, they both look at each other and start cracking up and they're like "GTD, I think both just saw your perfect man." So I turn around and there's a guy there and I'm like "yeah he's cute" he looked like my type or whatever. So then they both start getting on me like "you have to go talk to him!" and I'm like "no way, I've never talked to guys in bars before and I'm not going to start now, and besides neither of you have ever done it either." But they still keep pushing it and I'm like "there is nothing to say to this random person, I'm not going to just walk all the way over there and say 'hi.'"
anyway, eventually the guy left, but the point of all of this is that none of us knew how you talk to a random guy in bar, so the question is 1) would you have done it and 2) what would you have said?
and 3) my one friend said that her boyfriend says that anytime a girl initiates a conversation she will get at least get respect and stuff from the guy. but I argue that that doesn't apply to certain girls. discuss.
anyway, eventually the guy left, but the point of all of this is that none of us knew how you talk to a random guy in bar, so the question is 1) would you have done it and 2) what would you have said?
and 3) my one friend said that her boyfriend says that anytime a girl initiates a conversation she will get at least get respect and stuff from the guy. but I argue that that doesn't apply to certain girls. discuss.
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Your friends are right - chicks initiating convo = good.
"My name is George. I am unemployed and I live with my parents."
"Hi, I'm Victoria."
starting a convo is half the battle
but i always used the approach of who cares what they say ?
if they tell u to leave ,,leave if not hey it might be good
if u talk to 50 guys or gals in a night ,, at least 5-10 have to give you the time of the day
ya gotta just do it
Without saying too much here...I am of the opinion, that sometimes certain situations do not require be analyzed....Its not a matter of what is and isnt right or wrong to say, but rather if you wanted to talk to him and you thought he was cute, regardless of what you have to say, you just need to go for it sometimes. People disect things too damn much these days about what is and isnt acceptable in the "dating rules and regs book". If you thought he was cute, you simply should have just struck up a conversation. There is no ettiquette when it comes to this stuff...It is not 1950 any longer. imho....Not directed at you persay, but at the whole thing in general..
"Free Shipping" SPEEDY MCCREADY
My friend was going to see Eddie last night. Since he was in Vegas, I gave him 5 Grand to gamble with. I told him I wanted it all to go on Black. Bastard! PhillyCrownOfThorns-11-2-12
well I wouldn't really care about like being rejected or anything, but the point is, what do you say when you just get up and walk over to someone?
See the pick-up line thread
"The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"
"What's your name?"
"FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
simple basic shit,, hello whats up?
nothing over the top ,, just basic convo
i will say its probably easier for a guy to go over because we can use the buy ya a drink line
although a girl can say hey how bout u buy me a drink lol
but seriously whats up? hows ur night ? basic shit
if a person is interested in talking to you ,,it really doesnt matter what u say
see, that just sounds ridiculous to me. maybe if I were sitting next to them at the bar or something, but you don't just walk over to someone...
Why not? What's the worst that could happen?
"The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"
"What's your name?"
"FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
it just seems very contrived and unnatural.
honestly, who needs to ever go on any other website, read a paper, or turn on the news again when we have the pit? ha ha
seriously - I find EVERYTHING here.....
remember this old thread? i see you replied to it...
http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=219578
stop calling yourself "fat." besides I read an article that being over weight is now the norm. I looked for personality in a date. My husband is overweight. It does not change who he is.
8/08 - Ed solo in DC, 6/09 Ed in B'more,
10/10 - Brad in B'more
I don't wanna think, I wanna feel
Dublin 23/08/06 Lisbon I 04/09/06 Lisbon II 05/09/06 Paris 11/09/06 Verona 16/09/06
London 18/06/07 Dusseldorf 21/06/07 Copenhagen 26/06/07 Nijmegen 28/06/07
Of course it's that way. But the best things in life are those that you have to work at. If it's easy, what's the point and where's the fun?
"The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"
"What's your name?"
"FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
that is how people meet. "hi my name is..." On the contrary, it is very natural.
I met a few people on here that way - at a PJ show or gathering and people have just walked up to me and introduced themselves - and today we are friends.
You are reading too much into it. Keep it simple.
I kinda feel like if I'm meant to meet someone a conversation would naturally start... you know what I mean?
anyway, I also think it's hilarious that neither of my friends would ever do it either and yet they were so into pressuring me to do it. Oh now I remember what they wanted me to say...
"hey, did you go to [our college]?"
"no"
"oh sorry you look familiar. did you go to [my grad school]"
...
how lame is that???
I don't wanna think, I wanna feel
Dublin 23/08/06 Lisbon I 04/09/06 Lisbon II 05/09/06 Paris 11/09/06 Verona 16/09/06
London 18/06/07 Dusseldorf 21/06/07 Copenhagen 26/06/07 Nijmegen 28/06/07
yeah I mean it seems like if someone purposefully walks up to you and hands you a line or whatever, the FIRST thing you're going to be fixated on his sizing up how they look. I think you are dead on here. (and when you don't exactly look good that's probably not what you want happening!)
One of my best friends got married last year - she and her hubby were set up on a blind date. He fully admitted that if he ever saw her out at a bar - or any of her friends for that matter- he NEVER would have walked up to any of us. Meanwhile, they are a great match and happily married.
Guys get intimidated too.....it's all about taking a chance. If you see someone who really interests you, go for it. Just say "Hi, I'm GTD (insert real name!)" and see where it goes. you never know.....
go say hello,, screw it
We are typically superficial and base a lot on appearance (so do girls), but the right attitude will shine through appearance most often.
well exactly, that's why I'm not interested in dating.
(and I've been working out 4-7 days a week for over 10 years (I consider myself an athlete, it's a long story as to how I got fat involving my genes, a boyfriend, some medical problems, and a masters thesis).
Rejection is about gaining experience, not a statement about who you are. Don't let it get to you. Don't fear rejection. It's not going to hurt you.
really? you wouldn't just be like "oh come off it..."?
haha actually my friend and I once really DID think we went to college with a guy we saw in bar so we went up and said hi but it wasn't him...haha I'm sure he thought we were coming on to him...
I beg to differ kind sir. After using the line from the pick-up thread about nice shoes, the only way I could describe that glass being smashed against my face would be painful.
"The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"
"What's your name?"
"FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
Well, I don't know your body type or your medical history, so I cannot comment on those factors. But if you are regularly expending more calories than you take in, you will lose weight/size. That's the gist of the situation. So maybe you've just gotten yourself into a routine that is not sufficient for the amount of food you feel comfortable eating.
And...a healthy woman with curves is WAAAAAY more sexy than a healthy woman with zero curves. 9 out of 10 guys will agree with that. A woman's body can be completely fit with a few extra pounds.
this is really not the point of this thread. I'm not looking for weight loss advice.