Men! Think back, and answer me this little question -

GreenTeaDisease

soulsinging wrote:

it's got nothing to do with self esteem.

it does. My college roommate is like this. I had to basically cut off our friendship because of it, because everything positive you said to her she thought you had an alteria motive and freaked out. For one example among many, I once told her that a new pair of jeans she got made her look super thin. She FREAKED OUT and told me that was my way of telling her she was fat! It's the same thing, you think there is a set of compliments a woman can give a man that mean something they don't. It's true the word "nice" has virtually no meaning, but whatever that's not the point. The point is a woman telling a man that he's cute or nice or smart or whatever, does not mean she's telling him he's bad in bed, just like telling someone they look good in a pair of jeans doesn't mean they look bad in everything else. It can only be construed as such by a person with low self esteem.

GreenTeaDisease

Sian-of-the-dead wrote:

Again, I agree with Helen. This is completely untrue. I call and see my ex all the time because we're friends. He has a great life now as do I. We've known each other 8 years and shared everything for 6 of those so why shouldn't we? I for one, can't just switch off like that... life's too short for cheap ego boosts.

I talk to my ex everyday! I might go visit him sometime this spring if I can afford the plane fare.

Heineken Helen

soulsinging wrote:

i see. so it IS ok to make generalizations about the wants and behaviors of the sexes, but only as long as 1) HH agrees with them and 2) they are polite and complimentary, never critical.

I said 'A LOT OF WOMEN' rather than your 'women are bitches' :rolleyes: and I AM one... you're not... so I dunno, SOMETHING tells me I might know a LITTLE bit more about what's going on in my head than you do :cool:

As for your next post... 'no' as in it didn't make it worse until the point where we stopped talking completely.

WantedTo

It's sweet, but it makes my skin cringe when they say:

"You're like a brother to me"

*shivers*

Jeremy1012

Heineken Helen wrote:

As for your next post... 'no' as in it didn't make it worse until the point where we stopped talking completely.

Don't anticipate his posts. Where's the fun in that?

GreenTeaDisease

WantedTo wrote:

It's sweet, but it makes my skin cringe when they say:

"You're like a brother to me"

*shivers*

but it would only make cringe if you had romantic feelings for them right? why would it make you cringe otherwise?

Heineken Helen

Jeremy1012 wrote:

Don't anticipate his posts. Where's the fun in that?

he'd already posted it... I just couldn't be bothered quoting him twice. But yup, ss is nothing if not predictable

Jeremy1012

Heineken Helen wrote:

he'd already posted it... I just couldn't be bothered quoting him twice. But yup, ss is nothing if not predictable

Oh. my bad I get you. I thought you were responding to him before he could even say anything

soulsinging

GreenTeaDisease wrote:

it does. My college roommate is like this. I had to basically cut off our friendship because of it, because everything positive you said to her she thought you had an alteria motive and freaked out. For one example among many, I once told her that a new pair of jeans she got made her look super thin. She FREAKED OUT and told me that was my way of telling her she was fat! It's the same thing, you think there is a set of compliments a woman can give a man that mean something they don't. It's true the word "nice" has virtually no meaning, but whatever that's not the point. The point is a woman telling a man that he's cute or nice or smart or whatever, does not mean she's telling him he's bad in bed, just like telling someone they look good in a pair of jeans doesn't mean they look bad in everything else. It can only be construed as such by a person with low self esteem.

is that kinda like how you manage to turn 9 outta 10 threads you join into moaning about your weight and how unattractive you feel and how you're terrified to leave your house with your friends?

soulsinging

Heineken Helen wrote:

I said 'A LOT OF WOMEN' rather than your 'women are bitches' :rolleyes: and I AM one... you're not... so I dunno, SOMETHING tells me I might know a LITTLE bit more about what's going on in my head than you do :cool:

As for your next post... 'no' as in it didn't make it worse until the point where we stopped talking completely.

you're talking semantics. i've nevr claimed anything i say applies ironclad to every human being to walk the planet. and considering i am a man and i've tried to date more women than you have, i think i may have a bit more insight into how men perceive female behavior in relationships than you do. i don't give a fuck what your thoughts or intentions are, i am talking about how they come off.

soulsinging

WantedTo wrote:

It's sweet, but it makes my skin cringe when they say:

"You're like a brother to me"

*shivers*

exactly what im talking about. if you want to get a guy's attention and interest, you do not say things like that.

Heineken Helen

soulsinging wrote:

is that kinda like how you manage to turn 9 outta 10 threads you join into moaning about your weight and how unattractive you feel and how you're terrified to leave your house with your friends?

Nothing like how you turn 10 outta 10 threads into how all women are the root of all evil and how all men only think with the little brain all the time?

soulsinging

Heineken Helen wrote:

he'd already posted it... I just couldn't be bothered quoting him twice. But yup, ss is nothing if not predictable

this from the fountain of originality :rolleyes:

got any more coworkers you'd like to complain about?

Jeremy1012

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

ahem. I'm sorry

This is interesting though.

Heineken Helen

soulsinging wrote:

you're talking semantics. i've nevr claimed anything i say applies ironclad to every human being to walk the planet. and considering i am a man and i've tried to date more women than you have, i think i may have a bit more insight into how men perceive female behavior in relationships than you do. i don't give a fuck what your thoughts or intentions are, i am talking about how they come off.

When did I state MY opinion as fact? I said A LOT of women... prove me wrong if I'm wrong... if not, stop arguing something that you don't know

soulsinging

Heineken Helen wrote:

Nothing like how you turn 10 outta 10 threads into how all women are the root of all evil and how all men only think with the little brain all the time?

exactly. we've got the pot calling the kettle here.

soulsinging

Heineken Helen wrote:

When did I state MY opinion as fact? I said A LOT of women... prove me wrong if I'm wrong... if not, stop arguing something that you don't know

that is my point. where have i ever said my opinion is fact? prove me wrong if im wrong. if not, YOU can stop telling ME how i NEED to react to the shit you pull.

Heineken Helen

soulsinging wrote:

exactly. we've got the pot calling the kettle here.

where? I may have said some kinda generalisation about men oh I dunno, maybe once every two weeks (and that's being generous), not EVERY thread and I usually try to imply that I'm joking but it's not my fault you don't have a sense of humour... it just gets a little old. We all know you hate women, this was meant to be a nice thread... when are ya gonna stop derailing every nice thread into your petty little women issues? Cos they're just not very interesting.

GreenTeaDisease

soulsinging wrote:

is that kinda like how you manage to turn 9 outta 10 threads you join into moaning about your weight and how unattractive you feel and how you're terrified to leave your house with your friends?

1) that's off topic
2) that's not low self esteem-it's fact, I gained 45 fucking lbs, I am a 5'4" woman who weighs over 200 lbs and has bad acne. if someone gives me a compliment, I take it. I personally I have very high self esteem.
3) you are soooo defensive. whenever anyone calls you out on something, you just snap back with some off topic, pointless insult like a 5 year old.

Heineken Helen

soulsinging wrote:

that is my point. where have i ever said my opinion is fact? prove me wrong if im wrong. if not, YOU can stop telling ME how i NEED to react to the shit you pull.

What? I think you have anger issues ss :( and if you're gonna make a generalisation you should put IMO in front of it... otherwise people will take it AS a generalisation... imagine that