again, i wasn't saying *you*...i was looking at it objectively, simply asking if you could not even see that there may be some *others* out there who could see a space between a totally monogamous relationship and simply playing the field, and desiring to exist as a couple in such a place. obviously, it would be a very small minority of people who could happily coexist in such a relationship.
I can only give you my own perspective. I can't answer what other people feel or think. So that's "my" view on it.
The more I think about it, the more I wonder, why would you even want to be in a relationship where you're not satisfied with what you have?
I saw your part about what if your partner can't perform anymore... well... vows are sickness and in health, right? So therefore, I would deal with that on my own or give it up rather than be with someone else.
I can only give you my own perspective. I can't answer what other people feel or think. So that's "my" view on it.
The more I think about it, the more I wonder, why would you even want to be in a relationship where you're not satisfied with what you have?
I saw your part about what if your partner can't perform anymore... well... vows are sickness and in health, right? So therefore, I would deal with that on my own or give it up rather than be with someone else.
ok then. yes, if asked my personal thoughts/opinions on something...i give that. and sure, that was asked as well. beyond that, i thought perhaps you and others can and do look at it from possible other perspectives, a little objectivity, etc. don't want to or can't do that...so be it. thus why i asked if you could see that, and apparently you can't. so be it.
and yes, i agree...vows are in sickness and in health. i wouldn't think of it as abandoning the person. thus why you'd stay together, live together, still love and care for each other, etc.....and sure, i would hope *do* whatever you can to please each other. i just think, i could see that happening, and it being ok. then again, i can see a couple choosing to have an open relationship just because they enjoy it. i don't have to personally see something for myself to at least see that it may work and bring happiness to others. dunno. obviously, differing perspectives.....
anyhooooooo...i still strongly suggest breaking the waves...it's an eye opener for a very different pov.
ok then. yes, if asked my personal thoughts/opinions on something...i give that. and sure, that was asked as well. beyond that, i thought perhaps you and others can and do look at it from possible other perspectives, a little objectivity, etc. don't want to or can't do that...so be it. thus why i asked if you could see that, and apparently you can't. so be it.
and yes, i agree...vows are in sickness and in health. i wouldn't think of it as abandoning the person. thus why you'd stay together, live together, still love and care for each other, etc.....and sure, i would hope *do* whatever you can to please each other. i just think, i could see that happening, and it being ok. then again, i can see a couple choosing to have an open relationship just because they enjoy it. i don't have to personally see something for myself to at least see that it may work and bring happiness to others. dunno. obviously, differing perspectives.....
anyhooooooo...i still strongly suggest breaking the waves...it's an eye opener for a very different pov.
**shrug** I don't really care what other people do. Yes I think its bizarre and no I can't see why anyone would want to do that. It seems incredibly selfish to me and takes the trust and commitment right out of the relationship.
I'm sure someone who has been in one of these can give you the proper advice that you are maybe looking for or just try it out and see what happens??
**shrug** I don't really care what other people do. Yes I think its bizarre and no I can't see why anyone would want to do that. It seems incredibly selfish to me and takes the trust and commitment right out of the relationship.
I'm sure someone who has been in one of these can give you the proper advice that you are maybe looking for or just try it out and see what happens??
hahaha. i'm not looking for advice. as i said, this is not a *personal* thing, i rarely discuss personal on the board, nad certainly not THIS personal ever! haha. and i would never 'try something out' and throw caution to the wind, i do VALUE my marriage too much. i would think, it would be something a couple would DISCUSS if they so desire, or i would HOPE they would...b/c otherwise, not very 'open' at all eh? i think it's interesting to DISCUSS people's varying perspectives on the topic.
obviously if it is agreed to by both parties, i would not view it as 'selfish' at all....obviously i'd think the trust and commitment would have to be VERY STRONG to do such, actually. however, it would really be dependant on the scenario of the 'openess' i guess, why one wants such...what one hopes to get from it, and yea, what the couple may think it would ADD to their relationship.
i don't *care* what people do, but the whys of their choices DO interest me. i find it fascinating, human nature...and how we all go our way through life.
anyhooo...whatever. i thought it a interesting topic. i have had some pretty cool discussions about it in the past. i just watched breaking the waves again over the weekend, so was fresh in my mind.
me personally - could NEVER do it. please....I have a difficult enough time just dating!!
Funny though b/c I was out w/a co-worker recently who was telling me that her friends decided to do this - married very young and got bored - it started out great and ended horrifically. which is what i would suspect most of these would....someone inevitably gets hurt.
My ex put me in this type of situation with her ex (is that too complicated to follow?). What an awful experience that was.
If you're going to be with someone, be with that one person. I'm not saying not to have friends and such. There just shouldn't be anyone else that close emotionally or there will be problems.
If you are single, just out having a good time, no strings attached to anyone, I see nothing wrong with threesomes.
If you are not single, and you participate in a threesome, I just dont see that working. maybe one night when everyone is drunk and there is some good grass being passed around. just kidding.
I can only imagine the discussion the next day when everyone sobers up ....
"You paid waaaaaaaaaaaay too much attention to him/her last night. what was that all about? you want to be with them instead dont you?"
you might even slip up in the heat of the moment and say something like "this is the best _____ ever", bringing things to a grinding halt I would assume.
and as far as swapping, why would you give some dude/lady your significant other to have their way with and why would you want to do the same with theirs?
"thanks dude, here you go, enjoy. Ill be in that room _______ the ____ out of your wife"
um....no.
I was talking about married couples. I would not have a threesome if I were single. That's just me.
I agree with your points.
9/98, 9/00 - DC, 4/03 - Pitt., 7/03 - Bristow, 10/04 - Reading, 10/05 - Philly, 5/06 - DC, 6/06 - Pitt., 6/08 - Va Beach, 6/08 - DC, 5/10 - Bristow, 10/13 B'more
8/08 - Ed solo in DC, 6/09 Ed in B'more,
10/10 - Brad in B'more
i think open relationships are doable with the right people involved. if a balance is struck between what it is youre getting from one person as opposed to what youre getting from the third person, then absolutely do it. i know if there were certain things i wasnt getting from my partner(and he said he could not provide them for whatever reason) and we both agreed that i could go elsewhere for that need, then why not? but if he didnt agree with what i was proposing then of course i wouldnt do it. something else would have to be worked out. i dont see such a situation diminishing the feelings i have for my partner. but my god you'd have to be strong in your relationship for this kind of thing to happen and for it to be workable.
hear my name
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
no alterior motives, simply conversation. if i were *really* wondering about it, i think i'd be having this conversation with my husband, not here.
it's called : breaking the waves
great flim! also, obviously, quite thought-provoking! i've seen it a few times, and was just discussing it again recently....and it's a pretty big part of the film plot.
well dear...it's a serious subject to those that have lived it...so that's why I wondered...
I think usually it comes up because someone asks you to do it, or, someone needs the flexibility because they know they can't be faithful, or, they are involved in it because they love someone so very much that they wonder if they should agree to it....
BUT, but, but
I think that if you are an honest person, you know that it's not ideal for the person who has to bury their feelings of jealousy and fear and love to live through the hurt it can cause.
While it might work if the exchange can be fair somehow...usually is ISN'T fair and that's the hurtful part of it.
I think that the ego usually turns these kind of relationships very sour, very quick. I think it is doable but only when involving consenting, stable, confident, secure and open minded individuals.
***I'm not saying that people who wouldn't choose this lifestyle are close minded...only saying that those who do must be open to the things this kind of agreement might include.
If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
-Oscar Wilde
I was once invited back to this house after the pub shut, for more beers, by this couple I knew. Now, I like beer, so I went. There was this French woman with them. Yes, the fact that she was French is key here. They're sex mad. I was invited to help myself to the fridge and get a beer. Once I got back to the living room, the French woman had the English woman naked and on top of the table, the English bloke was off to take the dog for a walk and I was invited to jump on the table with the two women. I took my beer, said goodnight to the English bloke with the dog and walked home in the summer air.
Apparently when the bloke came back from taking his dog for a shit, the two woman had fallen out, had a punch up and the police were called. The bloke and the woman split up, the French woman couldn't remember anything that had happened, the next day, and the dog has a new English bloke to walk it. Oh, but at least I got a beer after hours, with my integrity intact.
I think that the ego usually turns these kind of relationships very sour, very quick. I think it is doable but only when involving consenting, stable, confident, secure and open minded individuals.
***I'm not saying that people who wouldn't choose this lifestyle are close minded...only saying that those who do must be open to the things this kind of agreement might include.
I think even if a person is "open-minded" they will discover that there are difficulties in a relationship like this.
The emotions that pop up when involved in a situation like this are not due to a "closed mind." Rather, they are due to the passionate nature of the attachment and love.
It takes an awful lot of love to agree to a situation like this. Therefore, when it goes sour, it is even more hurtful than a standard marriage or relationship.
I was once invited back to this house after the pub shut, for more beers, by this couple I knew. Now, I like beer, so I went. There was this French woman with them. Yes, the fact that she was French is key here. They're sex mad. I was invited to help myself to the fridge and get a beer. Once I got back to the living room, the French woman had the English woman naked and on top of the table, the English bloke was off to take the dog for a walk and I was invited to jump on the table with the two women. I took my beer, said goodnight to the English bloke with the dog and walked home in the summer air.
Apparently when the bloke came back from taking his dog for a shit, the two woman had fallen out, had a punch up and the police were called. The bloke and the woman split up, the French woman couldn't remember anything that had happened, the next day, and the dog has a new English bloke to walk it. Oh, but at least I got a beer after hours, with my integrity intact.
WHY did you not join in?!
"I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
I think that they may work for some people, but I am most certainly not one of them. For this to work, the people involved must be getting something else from a third (or fourth, fifth...etc) party that they can't get in their own relationship (in my opinion). The reason I think that is, if you have everything you need within your own relationship, then why would you look elsewhere for anything? Maybe i'm wrong, but that's just how I see it.
Is this better than cheating on someone? Well, the reasons would be similar. Looking for something that your relationship is lacking otherwise, only with an "open relationship" type thing, you have the other person's consent. The only way I think it could really work is if both parties REALLY wanted to try it, and were truly comfortable with it, but I don't think that would happen often. In the end I think it's going to end with someone getting hurt.
Why isn't it for me? I'm quite traditional in my view of love and relationships. If i'm with someone, I only really have eyes for them, and they pretty much give me everything I need, otherwise, I wouldn't be with them in the first place. Another reason I couldn't go for it is, I guess I would be classed as the jealous type. Not insanely jealous, but jealous enough that if someone else was with my girlfriend, I could not handle it, and they wouldn't keep their head attached to their shoulders for very long if I caught them...wait...did I say not insanely jealous? ;)
Interesting topic though.
~AKA Dave-of-the-dead~
I don't wanna think, I wanna feel
Dublin 23/08/06 Lisbon I 04/09/06 Lisbon II 05/09/06 Paris 11/09/06 Verona 16/09/06
London 18/06/07 Dusseldorf 21/06/07 Copenhagen 26/06/07 Nijmegen 28/06/07
I could tell you, in a PM, I suppose. It's very funny.
I'm listening.
or reading rather.
"I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
I think that they may work for some people, but I am most certainly not one of them. For this to work, the people involved must be getting something else from a third (or fourth, fifth...etc) party that they can't get in their own relationship (in my opinion). The reason I think that is, if you have everything you need within your own relationship, then why would you look elsewhere for anything? Maybe i'm wrong, but that's just how I see it.
Is this better than cheating on someone? Well, the reasons would be similar. Looking for something that your relationship is lacking otherwise, only with an "open relationship" type thing, you have the other person's consent. The only way I think it could really work is if both parties REALLY wanted to try it, and were truly comfortable with it, but I don't think that would happen often. In the end I think it's going to end with someone getting hurt.
Why isn't it for me? I'm quite traditional in my view of love and relationships. If i'm with someone, I only really have eyes for them, and they pretty much give me everything I need, otherwise, I wouldn't be with them in the first place. Another reason I couldn't go for it is, I guess I would be classed as the jealous type. Not insanely jealous, but jealous enough that if someone else was with my girlfriend, I could not handle it, and they wouldn't keep their head attached to their shoulders for very long if I caught them...wait...did I say not insanely jealous? ;)
Interesting topic though.
Very well put. I agree with everything you wrote.
"I'd rather be with an animal." "Those that can be trusted can change their mind." "The in between is mine." "If I don't lose control, explore and not explode, a preternatural other plane with the power to maintain." "Yeh this is living." "Life is what you make it."
That goes for a man or a woman, just so we're clear...
Well, I luckily haven't been put in that situation. Who knows? lol
"I'd rather be with an animal." "Those that can be trusted can change their mind." "The in between is mine." "If I don't lose control, explore and not explode, a preternatural other plane with the power to maintain." "Yeh this is living." "Life is what you make it."
From someone with experience in this sort of thing, the first thing to say is that it most definitely is not for everyone. There has to be an extremely unmovable amount of trust between you and your partner. Both partners have to be able to separate lust from emotional connection. Rules and guidelines need to be openly communicated often and followed. If any of these components are compromised, then it will definitely not work and will probably end up in the couple removing themselves from the lifestyle or in termination of the relationship. For the couples who have enough love and trust for eachother to handle this sort of thing and conform to the aforementioned guidelines, kudos to you (it can be a fucking blast!!!)
Everything not forbidden is compulsory and eveything not compulsory is forbidden. You are free... free to do what the government says you can do.
I think even if a person is "open-minded" they will discover that there are difficulties in a relationship like this.
The emotions that pop up when involved in a situation like this are not due to a "closed mind." Rather, they are due to the passionate nature of the attachment and love.
It takes an awful lot of love to agree to a situation like this. Therefore, when it goes sour, it is even more hurtful than a standard marriage or relationship.
Oh yeah, just because someone is usually the open minded type doesn't mean that automatically qualifies them for being able to handle this kind of relationship. I was simply saying it would be a needed trait because if you went into this kinda thing with a closed mind, you're not going to be able to handle the complexities of the situation. I'd say, in our current culture and it's societal norms laced with heavy emphasis on the ego, these kind of relationships rarely last or work out too well. It's possible but for a very select few who can handle it.
If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
-Oscar Wilde
recipe for disaster.....or doable with the right couple/open minds?
thoughts?
just a conversation starter for a grey monday afternoon...........;)
I am in one right now, and well, it sucks to be a girl. I hate these things called "feelings" because they get in the way of having fun. I really wish I were a guy about it and could have casual sex and not think twice about the person I just did. I mean, the guy is great, and we get along well, and the rest of it is magnficent... I want to keep it going, so I've decided to care less. He's not really my "dream" guy either. We've got too much in common. We think the exact same way, we have the same ideology, same interests, we're pretty ridiculous to be around, no one gets bored. I dunno. I am wishing that when I see him next, I can make up for making an ass out of myself as I did this past weekend. Oh man... I was not quiet sober and I don't know what I said to him...
Don't let the world bring you down, not everyone here is that fucked up and cold. Remember why you came and while you're alive, experience the warmth before you grow old.
Best two days of my life: Oasis at MSG and Pearl Jam at the Gorge.
I really wish I were a guy about it and could have casual sex and not think twice about the person I just did.
You really think that all guys are like that? I can't speak for all guys, but I for one could not do that. And i'm sure you can look at it from another angle aswell and say that there are women out there who could have sex and not think twice about it. It has nothing at all to do with gender, but to do with who you are.
It really does bemuse me that in 2008 some people still think this way.
~AKA Dave-of-the-dead~
I don't wanna think, I wanna feel
Dublin 23/08/06 Lisbon I 04/09/06 Lisbon II 05/09/06 Paris 11/09/06 Verona 16/09/06
London 18/06/07 Dusseldorf 21/06/07 Copenhagen 26/06/07 Nijmegen 28/06/07
You really think that all guys are like that? I can't speak for all guys, but I for one could not do that. And i'm sure you can look at it from another angle aswell and say that there are women out there who could have sex and not think twice about it. It has nothing at all to do with gender, but to do with who you are.
It really does bemuse me that in 2008 some people still think this way.
right on... plus to have a "successful" open relationship there absolutely has to be strong emotional ties between the couple. Otherwise you're just talking about temporary "fuck buddies."
Everything not forbidden is compulsory and eveything not compulsory is forbidden. You are free... free to do what the government says you can do.
You really think that all guys are like that? I can't speak for all guys, but I for one could not do that. And i'm sure you can look at it from another angle aswell and say that there are women out there who could have sex and not think twice about it. It has nothing at all to do with gender, but to do with who you are.
It really does bemuse me that in 2008 some people still think this way.
Well, it's not like I think that about every guy, but it seems like all the guys I've met lately are like this. I mean, it seems like they have no heart at all. They use you, and treat you like crap, they find someone else, and ditch you. you on the other hand are left behind crying, and feeling shitty as fuck. i mean, this isn't quiet my situation, as the guy i'm in this "open relationship" with won't tell me what is goin on in his head. i need communication... my friends and i are always in the same fucking boat. i want to meet a guy who has feelings, but not so much that they fucking cry like pansy ass bitches, like my last two boyfriends. that pissed me off so much, it was like i was the man in the relationship. i just want a man's man, who has a heart. where are they??? i will go there, and hopefully find my prince charming.
Don't let the world bring you down, not everyone here is that fucked up and cold. Remember why you came and while you're alive, experience the warmth before you grow old.
Best two days of my life: Oasis at MSG and Pearl Jam at the Gorge.
Comments
ok then. yes, if asked my personal thoughts/opinions on something...i give that. and sure, that was asked as well. beyond that, i thought perhaps you and others can and do look at it from possible other perspectives, a little objectivity, etc. don't want to or can't do that...so be it. thus why i asked if you could see that, and apparently you can't. so be it.
and yes, i agree...vows are in sickness and in health. i wouldn't think of it as abandoning the person. thus why you'd stay together, live together, still love and care for each other, etc.....and sure, i would hope *do* whatever you can to please each other. i just think, i could see that happening, and it being ok. then again, i can see a couple choosing to have an open relationship just because they enjoy it. i don't have to personally see something for myself to at least see that it may work and bring happiness to others. dunno. obviously, differing perspectives.....
anyhooooooo...i still strongly suggest breaking the waves...it's an eye opener for a very different pov.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
**shrug** I don't really care what other people do. Yes I think its bizarre and no I can't see why anyone would want to do that. It seems incredibly selfish to me and takes the trust and commitment right out of the relationship.
I'm sure someone who has been in one of these can give you the proper advice that you are maybe looking for or just try it out and see what happens??
hahaha. i'm not looking for advice. as i said, this is not a *personal* thing, i rarely discuss personal on the board, nad certainly not THIS personal ever! haha. and i would never 'try something out' and throw caution to the wind, i do VALUE my marriage too much. i would think, it would be something a couple would DISCUSS if they so desire, or i would HOPE they would...b/c otherwise, not very 'open' at all eh? i think it's interesting to DISCUSS people's varying perspectives on the topic.
obviously if it is agreed to by both parties, i would not view it as 'selfish' at all....obviously i'd think the trust and commitment would have to be VERY STRONG to do such, actually. however, it would really be dependant on the scenario of the 'openess' i guess, why one wants such...what one hopes to get from it, and yea, what the couple may think it would ADD to their relationship.
i don't *care* what people do, but the whys of their choices DO interest me. i find it fascinating, human nature...and how we all go our way through life.
anyhooo...whatever. i thought it a interesting topic. i have had some pretty cool discussions about it in the past. i just watched breaking the waves again over the weekend, so was fresh in my mind.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
Funny though b/c I was out w/a co-worker recently who was telling me that her friends decided to do this - married very young and got bored - it started out great and ended horrifically. which is what i would suspect most of these would....someone inevitably gets hurt.
My ex put me in this type of situation with her ex (is that too complicated to follow?). What an awful experience that was.
If you're going to be with someone, be with that one person. I'm not saying not to have friends and such. There just shouldn't be anyone else that close emotionally or there will be problems.
I was talking about married couples. I would not have a threesome if I were single. That's just me.
I agree with your points.
8/08 - Ed solo in DC, 6/09 Ed in B'more,
10/10 - Brad in B'more
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
well dear...it's a serious subject to those that have lived it...so that's why I wondered...
I think usually it comes up because someone asks you to do it, or, someone needs the flexibility because they know they can't be faithful, or, they are involved in it because they love someone so very much that they wonder if they should agree to it....
BUT, but, but
I think that if you are an honest person, you know that it's not ideal for the person who has to bury their feelings of jealousy and fear and love to live through the hurt it can cause.
While it might work if the exchange can be fair somehow...usually is ISN'T fair and that's the hurtful part of it.
***I'm not saying that people who wouldn't choose this lifestyle are close minded...only saying that those who do must be open to the things this kind of agreement might include.
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
-Oscar Wilde
he had decided after 20 years of marriage that this is the lifestyle he wanted to pursue....
he has since been thrown out of the house and will soon be divorced...
Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
Apparently when the bloke came back from taking his dog for a shit, the two woman had fallen out, had a punch up and the police were called. The bloke and the woman split up, the French woman couldn't remember anything that had happened, the next day, and the dog has a new English bloke to walk it. Oh, but at least I got a beer after hours, with my integrity intact.
I think even if a person is "open-minded" they will discover that there are difficulties in a relationship like this.
The emotions that pop up when involved in a situation like this are not due to a "closed mind." Rather, they are due to the passionate nature of the attachment and love.
It takes an awful lot of love to agree to a situation like this. Therefore, when it goes sour, it is even more hurtful than a standard marriage or relationship.
Is this better than cheating on someone? Well, the reasons would be similar. Looking for something that your relationship is lacking otherwise, only with an "open relationship" type thing, you have the other person's consent. The only way I think it could really work is if both parties REALLY wanted to try it, and were truly comfortable with it, but I don't think that would happen often. In the end I think it's going to end with someone getting hurt.
Why isn't it for me? I'm quite traditional in my view of love and relationships. If i'm with someone, I only really have eyes for them, and they pretty much give me everything I need, otherwise, I wouldn't be with them in the first place. Another reason I couldn't go for it is, I guess I would be classed as the jealous type. Not insanely jealous, but jealous enough that if someone else was with my girlfriend, I could not handle it, and they wouldn't keep their head attached to their shoulders for very long if I caught them...wait...did I say not insanely jealous?
Interesting topic though.
I don't wanna think, I wanna feel
Dublin 23/08/06 Lisbon I 04/09/06 Lisbon II 05/09/06 Paris 11/09/06 Verona 16/09/06
London 18/06/07 Dusseldorf 21/06/07 Copenhagen 26/06/07 Nijmegen 28/06/07
I could tell you, in a PM, I suppose. It's very funny.
or reading rather.
Hahaha, I have a sudden influx of PMs. "What happened?"
***
That goes for a man or a woman, just so we're clear...
I don't wanna think, I wanna feel
Dublin 23/08/06 Lisbon I 04/09/06 Lisbon II 05/09/06 Paris 11/09/06 Verona 16/09/06
London 18/06/07 Dusseldorf 21/06/07 Copenhagen 26/06/07 Nijmegen 28/06/07
Haha, there were some other PMs too. Even from bannedsville.
Yeah. I know I'm not the only curious person around.
Oh yeah, just because someone is usually the open minded type doesn't mean that automatically qualifies them for being able to handle this kind of relationship. I was simply saying it would be a needed trait because if you went into this kinda thing with a closed mind, you're not going to be able to handle the complexities of the situation. I'd say, in our current culture and it's societal norms laced with heavy emphasis on the ego, these kind of relationships rarely last or work out too well. It's possible but for a very select few who can handle it.
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
-Oscar Wilde
I am in one right now, and well, it sucks to be a girl. I hate these things called "feelings" because they get in the way of having fun. I really wish I were a guy about it and could have casual sex and not think twice about the person I just did. I mean, the guy is great, and we get along well, and the rest of it is magnficent... I want to keep it going, so I've decided to care less. He's not really my "dream" guy either. We've got too much in common. We think the exact same way, we have the same ideology, same interests, we're pretty ridiculous to be around, no one gets bored. I dunno. I am wishing that when I see him next, I can make up for making an ass out of myself as I did this past weekend. Oh man... I was not quiet sober and I don't know what I said to him...
Best two days of my life: Oasis at MSG and Pearl Jam at the Gorge.
You really think that all guys are like that? I can't speak for all guys, but I for one could not do that. And i'm sure you can look at it from another angle aswell and say that there are women out there who could have sex and not think twice about it. It has nothing at all to do with gender, but to do with who you are.
It really does bemuse me that in 2008 some people still think this way.
I don't wanna think, I wanna feel
Dublin 23/08/06 Lisbon I 04/09/06 Lisbon II 05/09/06 Paris 11/09/06 Verona 16/09/06
London 18/06/07 Dusseldorf 21/06/07 Copenhagen 26/06/07 Nijmegen 28/06/07
right on... plus to have a "successful" open relationship there absolutely has to be strong emotional ties between the couple. Otherwise you're just talking about temporary "fuck buddies."
Well, it's not like I think that about every guy, but it seems like all the guys I've met lately are like this. I mean, it seems like they have no heart at all. They use you, and treat you like crap, they find someone else, and ditch you. you on the other hand are left behind crying, and feeling shitty as fuck. i mean, this isn't quiet my situation, as the guy i'm in this "open relationship" with won't tell me what is goin on in his head. i need communication... my friends and i are always in the same fucking boat. i want to meet a guy who has feelings, but not so much that they fucking cry like pansy ass bitches, like my last two boyfriends. that pissed me off so much, it was like i was the man in the relationship. i just want a man's man, who has a heart. where are they??? i will go there, and hopefully find my prince charming.
Best two days of my life: Oasis at MSG and Pearl Jam at the Gorge.