Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I think with me ( and I'm no expert I'm near 7 months in) I got to a point I didn't want it anymore and even more so my body didn't, 3 weeks I was angry and annoyed but as the days turned into weeks I found new patterns (none that are anywhere near being buzzed or away from my shit) all quite mundane but gradually life shifts to a different angle , for now. I've not done any gigs or gone anywhere really yet. I did a cover band and it was weird watching all the people and how drink makes them. I didn't feel at ease yet. But I didn't want the drink. That's just me I have a few other mental issues that being sober has made vivid and in my face sadly but that's part of me and I will either sink or swim. Hugh be brave with whatever you choose and never worry about what anyone thinks/says. Only you and your beautiful family. Big love mate
brixton 93
astoria 06
albany 06
hartford 06
reading 06
barcelona 06
paris 06
wembley 07
dusseldorf 07
nijmegen 07
this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
And yes, my wife has pressured me to stop/moderate since we literally started dating. A few years ago she started going to alanon to help her deal with living a binger. She went for a while, got the support she needed at the time. I had a better handle on things after that. But the job change, as I mentioned, caused some chaos on this context.
This to me would be enough of a signal that something probably needs to change. If your wife thinks its a problem, it probably is and you are just not seeing it. But as others have said, you have to want to change it for it to be effective.
You are oversimplifying a very complex issue. My wife can be a combination of very naive and also take things to the extreme.
She thought me smoking weed to watch a movie once every week or two was “becoming a problem”.
She thought getting fast food once in a while was “becoming a problem”.
My drinking habits only became a problem when her similar habits changed.
And yet, a month ago we had friends over, she got so loaded she fell down our fucking stairs in front of our teenagers, and that was funny/stupid but not a problem.
So forgive me if I don’t take my wife’s opinion as gospel over what is actually a problem.
"Oh Canada...you're beautiful when you're drunk" -EV 8/14/93
And yes, my wife has pressured me to stop/moderate since we literally started dating. A few years ago she started going to alanon to help her deal with living a binger. She went for a while, got the support she needed at the time. I had a better handle on things after that. But the job change, as I mentioned, caused some chaos on this context.
This to me would be enough of a signal that something probably needs to change. If your wife thinks its a problem, it probably is and you are just not seeing it. But as others have said, you have to want to change it for it to be effective.
You are oversimplifying a very complex issue. My wife can be a combination of very naive and also take things to the extreme.
She thought me smoking weed to watch a movie once every week or two was “becoming a problem”.
She thought getting fast food once in a while was “becoming a problem”.
My drinking habits only became a problem when her similar habits changed.
And yet, a month ago we had friends over, she got so loaded she fell down our fucking stairs in front of our teenagers, and that was funny/stupid but not a problem.
So forgive me if I don’t take my wife’s opinion as gospel over what is actually a problem.
OK. Sorry, just interpreted things from what I read in the original post. Obviously can't know all the details. Didn't mean to cause any distress. I, like the other guys, was only trying to offer some help/insight based on experience with this subject. Hope you find the right balance that works for you. I'm always willing to discuss if you want, be it here or in a PM. Take care.
There is no shame in being honest. It's the best way
only way. especially with ourselves.
You know what I meant. Getting judged by someone who obviously has only a small fraction of the picture but still chooses to judge.
but at its heart thats what did it for me. damn what other people thought. until I could be that honest with myself , nothing was going to get better for me. Mine was the more extreme case though I was facing help/change or go back to homelessness with zero prospects of improvement to my living situation.
an observation in your reply. It comes across as defensive. no need. here to help in whatever way I/we can with however you say you need it. maybe some of this coversation should switch to pm's . just a thought.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Comments
only way. especially with ourselves.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I got to a point I didn't want it anymore and even more so my body didn't, 3 weeks I was angry and annoyed but as the days turned into weeks I found new patterns (none that are anywhere near being buzzed or away from my shit) all quite mundane but gradually life shifts to a different angle , for now.
I've not done any gigs or gone anywhere really yet. I did a cover band and it was weird watching all the people and how drink makes them. I didn't feel at ease yet. But I didn't want the drink.
That's just me I have a few other mental issues that being sober has made vivid and in my face sadly but that's part of me and I will either sink or swim.
Hugh be brave with whatever you choose and never worry about what anyone thinks/says. Only you and your beautiful family.
Big love mate
astoria 06
albany 06
hartford 06
reading 06
barcelona 06
paris 06
wembley 07
dusseldorf 07
nijmegen 07
this song is meant to be called i got shit,itshould be called i got shit tickets-hartford 06 -
-EV 8/14/93
-EV 8/14/93
Didn't mean to cause any distress.
I, like the other guys, was only trying to offer some help/insight based on experience with this subject.
Hope you find the right balance that works for you. I'm always willing to discuss if you want, be it here or in a PM.
Take care.
-EV 8/14/93
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14