my problem would be cross addictions.
isn't that the term they use?
whiskey, weed, pills, snort some speed shit... what the fuck?
drop some acid, smoke some green, slam a 12 pack of beer.
that's how i existed for years.
mr. party guy
i honestly believe i am tired of the whole thing.
i like being around sober clean ppl.
i cannot stomach the things i used to do and the crowd i ran with.
also real quick i'd like to say that i never understood moderation and i still don't but i am learning it slowly.
Had my stomach pumped for the first time at 16. At aged 17, the night princess Diana died, I took some questionable speed and was foaming at the mouth in bed all night. I had to keep throwing up to keep breathing. By 18 I used to load the bong or skin up before bed so I had something to help me out of bed in the morning. Without it, breakfast was a struggle. Then there was the acid, the coke, the ketamine, the ecstacy, etc, etc. Always washed down with booze. Always.
Strangely, I never thought of myself as having a cross-addiction until recently. I assumed that because I gave up drugs cold turkey some 8 years ago, I was not addicted.
The truth is, I was so scared of life, I just wanted to do anything I could to not be in my own head. It's only my personal opinion but I feel like us alkies can't handle drugs either, we have addictive personalities and anything that makes us escape from ourselves is a dangerous thing to indulge in.
I often think that AA could just stand for 'addicts anonymous'. It's all the same.
seeing as how I used to crush seeds and shred stems to smoke when there was none to be had and also scrape and rescrape the bowl to within an inch of its life, I would say yes. Welcome. Come on in and set a spell.
im just glad im not a raging alcoholic like before.
that is terrifying to me.
almost daily i get the urge to drink.
my problem would be cross addictions.
isn't that the term they use?
whiskey, weed, pills, snort some speed shit... what the fuck?
drop some acid, smoke some green, slam a 12 pack of beer.
that's how i existed for years.
mr. party guy
fuck off...
i honestly believe i am tired of the whole thing.
i like being around sober clean ppl.
i cannot stomach the things i used to do and the crowd i ran with.
also real quick i'd like to say that i never understood moderation and i still don't but i am learning it slowly.
i have never been satisfied with a dime bag or something like that. i have to have 20 pounds or im not happy.
and i don't believe i been happy for years.
I don't think any of us understand moderation, one beer never enough unless maybe it was a full barrel. It got better one day at a time my friend. The possibilities in life expanded tremendously when I stopped chasing the next high. Finally comfortable in my own skin!
my problem would be cross addictions.
isn't that the term they use?
whiskey, weed, pills, snort some speed shit... what the fuck?
drop some acid, smoke some green, slam a 12 pack of beer.
that's how i existed for years.
mr. party guy
i honestly believe i am tired of the whole thing.
i like being around sober clean ppl.
i cannot stomach the things i used to do and the crowd i ran with.
also real quick i'd like to say that i never understood moderation and i still don't but i am learning it slowly.
Had my stomach pumped for the first time at 16. At aged 17, the night princess Diana died, I took some questionable speed and was foaming at the mouth in bed all night. I had to keep throwing up to keep breathing. By 18 I used to load the bong or skin up before bed so I had something to help me out of bed in the morning. Without it, breakfast was a struggle. Then there was the acid, the coke, the ketamine, the ecstacy, etc, etc. Always washed down with booze. Always.
Strangely, I never thought of myself as having a cross-addiction until recently. I assumed that because I gave up drugs cold turkey some 8 years ago, I was not addicted.
The truth is, I was so scared of life, I just wanted to do anything I could to not be in my own head. It's only my personal opinion but I feel like us alkies can't handle drugs either, we have addictive personalities and anything that makes us escape from ourselves is a dangerous thing to indulge in.
I often think that AA could just stand for 'addicts anonymous'. It's all the same.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I wander in here occasionally. I had initially thought the title of the thread was a play on us being Pearl Jam junkies until I read some posts.
My best friend is an alcoholic, struggling to remain sober (and no, I don't mean "a friend of mine" as if to cover it up for myself). At this point in her sobriety, we talk on the phone as we both know it is too easy of a trigger for us to meet for something as innocent as coffee. No, this thread is not for me, none of you are here for me but I've found all of you helpful in my being the non-alcoholic in my friendship with her over the last few years....just gives me acceptance to just be there for her, even if by phone, voicemail and email and probably more importantly, after 28 years of friendship, there isn't anything I can do.
believe it or not, we don't "need" anything. that is only the spoiled brat in us trying to fill some temporary solution to an emptyness that does not exist.
I have eaten so much gold I crapped excellence - drtyfrnk29
Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all!
Be careful what you wish for! Business has picked up and now I'm beginning to resent clients for being there and taking all my time whereas a month ago I was cursing them for not coming. That is the way my mind works if I don't work on my mind!
Maybe I need more of this program. I was reading in the mornings but that good habit hasn't been kept up and I feel the difference in my days. I have to stop convincing myself that I'm 'too busy' to work the steps.
Every time I do something, no matter how insignificant it seems, even writing this now, I feel better. I need to take that 2 minutes out of every hour to feel that weight being lifted. It really works for me that way.
Be careful what you wish for! Business has picked up and now I'm beginning to resent clients for being there and taking all my time whereas a month ago I was cursing them for not coming. That is the way my mind works if I don't work on my mind!
Maybe I need more of this program. I was reading in the mornings but that good habit hasn't been kept up and I feel the difference in my days. I have to stop convincing myself that I'm 'too busy' to work the steps.
Every time I do something, no matter how insignificant it seems, even writing this now, I feel better. I need to take that 2 minutes out of every hour to feel that weight being lifted. It really works for me that way.
its very easy to do. I find this myself. go into my day the same way as before. But I tell you, to go into it differently , produces different results. Need to do more of this myself.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I have 30 days today.....Never thought I would be able to do that even, 30 days ago I couldn't picture my life without alcohol or drugs.
*Official Marker in the Sand Fan Club Junkie*
Member # 0004
Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead
decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter
he grew a beard.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I found out this morning that my 15 year old cousin is going to live with my 70 yr old Aunt(his great grandmother) and I. It's not my house, so my permission wasn't needed or wanted. Thats perfectly fine.
I took this in stride as a fact of life , which it is , but the first thought that came was that I can be an example to him on a more regular basis. Not to raise him as such, but to teach him about life and what it can mean to be a human being. For myself I learn best by being shown, so I have to show HIM how I live. Direct and suggest, and leave him to decide for himself who and how he wants to be.
Suppose we'll have to wait and see how well I " practice these principles in all my affairs"!!!
I have to say , in his way, he was instrumental in getting me to a place where I could SEE the unmanageabilty of how I was living back then. He played his part in me getting to where I am today.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I found out this morning that my 15 year old cousin is going to live with my 70 yr old Aunt(his great grandmother) and I. It's not my house, so my permission wasn't needed or wanted. Thats perfectly fine.
I took this in stride as a fact of life , which it is , but the first thought that came was that I can be an example to him on a more regular basis. Not to raise him as such, but to teach him about life and what it can mean to be a human being. For myself I learn best by being shown, so I have to show HIM how I live. Direct and suggest, and leave him to decide for himself who and how he wants to be.
Suppose we'll have to wait and see how well I " practice these principles in all my affairs"!!!
I have to say , in his way, he was instrumental in getting me to a place where I could SEE the unmanageabilty of how I was living back then. He played his part in me getting to where I am today.
several missed opportunities for this. Perhaps next time. In the meantime along with hoping for the best , I need to practice , practice, practice.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Our third baby (first one since I got sober) is two weeks old now. Man, life is just happening and I feel sometimes like I'm swimming against some pretty strong currents. I'm struggling but I only have myself to blame. I take too much on and can't manage everything. This is more true since I got sober as I am committing the cardinal sin of trying to play 'catch up' for my unproductive years of abuse. I'm buring myself out.
Time to learn to relax, breathe the air a little, enjoy it all. Why get sober just to pile stress on myself? I may as well try to enjoy not drinking!
However, I can say that I do recognise danger signs within myself now that I'm sober. 15 months ago I would have just felt that it was a bad hangover, now I can be sure that I need to step back and reassess my actions. Sobriety gives me a clarity of mind and an understanding of myself and that gives me a choice to change that I never had when I was out there.
I asked a guy in our group for advice on my obsessive need to pile shit on myself today and he passed on some wisdom an old-timer had once given him: "the best way to stay sober is walk real slow and drink a lot of water".
I've forced myself (against my nature) to 'take it easy' since I got some good advice last week and I feel better for it. I'm trying to learn to prioritise and not sweat the details so much. I'm trying to say 'no' to some tasks and not take on more than I can handle. It's been a better week or two, it really has. I think I've accepted that burning yourself out before 35 is not the aim of life - especially when the more burnt out I get, the closer I get to slipping with our program. Slow and steady wins the race.
The other two members of our little English group here both got 6 months of sobriety this week. I'm not sure if I'd have made it this far if I hadn't met them a year ago. It was such a buzz to hear them both share that today, especially when they both had to fight so hard to get 24 hours. They both wanted it in January but it took until June before either could do it. I'm so pleased for them today.
Wow, just finished up our stores twice yearly storewide inventory. Didnt turnout as well as was hoped. but I'll do my damndest to do my part to make sure the next one is better.
Now this process is a surefire way to see how well I've done in correcting the defective use of my character. still some work in that area to be done! much to my chagrin. progress not perfection is the rule!!
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Have a safe and happy Christmas everyone. I got through the 'difficult' part already and now I can really relax and enjoy it. There was plenty of booze flying about today and felt jealous and tempted but I feel good for putting those thoughts out of my mind and playing with my baby son instead. Once again, enjoy yourselves and stay safe.
T
Have sober plans for the coming weekend. Starts on thursday with a meeting. then bowling with some AA friends afetr. One of which..... well, we'll see how things progress!
Friday, much needed day off!! unsure about daytime as yet, but the evening will be the homegroup meeting , possibly another after that, then to an AA friends NYE party. She will be there too..... again we'll see how things progress.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
what's the age group for young peoples meetings? i'm 27 and it's the only one available when i get off work
thanks. i can still pass for 19 anyways
hehe. age is a perception thing anyway. Coming from a 42 yr old, 27 is a puppy!! Besides its said our emotional growth stopped from the first time we picked up. Coming int AA put at about 14 if true!!
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Comments
Had my stomach pumped for the first time at 16. At aged 17, the night princess Diana died, I took some questionable speed and was foaming at the mouth in bed all night. I had to keep throwing up to keep breathing. By 18 I used to load the bong or skin up before bed so I had something to help me out of bed in the morning. Without it, breakfast was a struggle. Then there was the acid, the coke, the ketamine, the ecstacy, etc, etc. Always washed down with booze. Always.
Strangely, I never thought of myself as having a cross-addiction until recently. I assumed that because I gave up drugs cold turkey some 8 years ago, I was not addicted.
The truth is, I was so scared of life, I just wanted to do anything I could to not be in my own head. It's only my personal opinion but I feel like us alkies can't handle drugs either, we have addictive personalities and anything that makes us escape from ourselves is a dangerous thing to indulge in.
I often think that AA could just stand for 'addicts anonymous'. It's all the same.
I don't think any of us understand moderation, one beer never enough unless maybe it was a full barrel. It got better one day at a time my friend. The possibilities in life expanded tremendously when I stopped chasing the next high. Finally comfortable in my own skin!
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
My best friend is an alcoholic, struggling to remain sober (and no, I don't mean "a friend of mine" as if to cover it up for myself). At this point in her sobriety, we talk on the phone as we both know it is too easy of a trigger for us to meet for something as innocent as coffee. No, this thread is not for me, none of you are here for me but I've found all of you helpful in my being the non-alcoholic in my friendship with her over the last few years....just gives me acceptance to just be there for her, even if by phone, voicemail and email and probably more importantly, after 28 years of friendship, there isn't anything I can do.
I have eaten so much gold I crapped excellence - drtyfrnk29
Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all!
Maybe I need more of this program. I was reading in the mornings but that good habit hasn't been kept up and I feel the difference in my days. I have to stop convincing myself that I'm 'too busy' to work the steps.
Every time I do something, no matter how insignificant it seems, even writing this now, I feel better. I need to take that 2 minutes out of every hour to feel that weight being lifted. It really works for me that way.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Member # 0004
Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead
decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter
he grew a beard.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Congrats! That is great.
Stick with the winners
Well done!
I found out this morning that my 15 year old cousin is going to live with my 70 yr old Aunt(his great grandmother) and I. It's not my house, so my permission wasn't needed or wanted. Thats perfectly fine.
I took this in stride as a fact of life , which it is , but the first thought that came was that I can be an example to him on a more regular basis. Not to raise him as such, but to teach him about life and what it can mean to be a human being. For myself I learn best by being shown, so I have to show HIM how I live. Direct and suggest, and leave him to decide for himself who and how he wants to be.
Suppose we'll have to wait and see how well I " practice these principles in all my affairs"!!!
I have to say , in his way, he was instrumental in getting me to a place where I could SEE the unmanageabilty of how I was living back then. He played his part in me getting to where I am today.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
peace
Robb
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Time to learn to relax, breathe the air a little, enjoy it all. Why get sober just to pile stress on myself? I may as well try to enjoy not drinking!
However, I can say that I do recognise danger signs within myself now that I'm sober. 15 months ago I would have just felt that it was a bad hangover, now I can be sure that I need to step back and reassess my actions. Sobriety gives me a clarity of mind and an understanding of myself and that gives me a choice to change that I never had when I was out there.
I asked a guy in our group for advice on my obsessive need to pile shit on myself today and he passed on some wisdom an old-timer had once given him: "the best way to stay sober is walk real slow and drink a lot of water".
Wow, just finished up our stores twice yearly storewide inventory. Didnt turnout as well as was hoped. but I'll do my damndest to do my part to make sure the next one is better.
Now this process is a surefire way to see how well I've done in correcting the defective use of my character. still some work in that area to be done! much to my chagrin. progress not perfection is the rule!!
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Lao Tzu
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Xi Zhi
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
T
Friday, much needed day off!! unsure about daytime as yet, but the evening will be the homegroup meeting , possibly another after that, then to an AA friends NYE party. She will be there too..... again we'll see how things progress.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
That's a chunk of time right there.
I continue to make Pearl Jam and my love of live music part of my recovery discussions>>
Its an inside job..and I count my STEPS as I'm thumbing my way back to heaven..
some more great comments in AA meetings I have attended:
"I always felt like the black sheep of my family, but when I got to AA I found the rest of the herd"
"Its okay to look at your past but you don't have to stare at it"
"lots of meetings/ lots of chances for success in sobriety.. few meetings, few chances for success"
"I explained to a friend that going to AA meetings is kind of like sitting around a campfire..
I don't know why but I always feel good doing it.."
"the world record for staying sober remains 24 hours"
Scott in Boston
EV intro to Chloe Dancer / Crown of Thorns
10/25/13 Hartford
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
thanks. i can still pass for 19 anyways
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
i haven't been to a meeting in about 11 months. i'm actually kind of nervous :?