Do you people think that a relationship between a very religious girl who is part of a Christian youth group and a guy who is an atheist and hates organised religion and the Catholic church could ever work out?
Is she Catholic or not? If you "hate organized religion and that Catholic church" and she's Catholic, I'd say no. Being an atheist is different than hating a specific religion, or all religions. Not all atheists hate organized religion.
I'd say she is Catholic. She wears crucifixes, attends these Christian youth groups, is involved with my university's religious group. I know they are different, I just feel very strongly about the Catholic Church. I didn't say all atheists hate organised religion. I'm one that does.
How about you start with "Hello" and then see where things go. You have gotten way ahead of yourself and have doomed a relationship before it began . You have also made some assumptions about her that may not be true. Just because someone has religious faith does not mean they have a closed mind. How about you give her an opportunity to show you who she is?
Do you people think that a relationship between a very religious girl who is part of a Christian youth group and a guy who is an atheist and hates organised religion and the Catholic church could ever work out?
Is she Catholic or not? If you "hate organized religion and that Catholic church" and she's Catholic, I'd say no. Being an atheist is different than hating a specific religion, or all religions. Not all atheists hate organized religion.
I'd say she is Catholic. She wears crucifixes, attends these Christian youth groups, is involved with my university's religious group. I know they are different, I just feel very strongly about the Catholic Church. I didn't say all atheists hate organised religion. I'm one that does.
How about you start with "Hello" and then see where things go. You have gotten way ahead of yourself and have doomed a relationship before it began . You have also made some assumptions about her that may not be true. Just because someone has religious faith does not mean they have a closed mind. How about you give her an opportunity to show you who she is?
Do you people think that a relationship between a very religious girl who is part of a Christian youth group and a guy who is an atheist and hates organised religion and the Catholic church could ever work out?
Is she Catholic or not? If you "hate organized religion and that Catholic church" and she's Catholic, I'd say no. Being an atheist is different than hating a specific religion, or all religions. Not all atheists hate organized religion.
I'd say she is Catholic. She wears crucifixes, attends these Christian youth groups, is involved with my university's religious group. I know they are different, I just feel very strongly about the Catholic Church. I didn't say all atheists hate organised religion. I'm one that does.
How about you start with "Hello" and then see where things go. You have gotten way ahead of yourself and have doomed a relationship before it began . You have also made some assumptions about her that may not be true. Just because someone has religious faith does not mean they have a closed mind. How about you give her an opportunity to show you who she is?
Thanks. I actually don't talk to her. We briefly talked in class at university and I was kind of attracted to her and our eyes would meet from time to time on campus along with a smile on her face. She keeps popping up on suggested friends on Facebook due to having a mutual friend. Not sure if worth sending her a friend request and taking it from there. She finished her degree last semester so I am not sure I'll see her again unless she and I both do Honours next year at the same university (I know she's aiming to get into Honours). Another issue, the age gap....
As for religion, I just hate how it is a reason people use to deny others their basic human rights (like marrying someone they love). Just gets me mad.
Do not get hung on people's religious belief's. You have not even been on a date and you are already judging her and her beliefs. Most people who belong to organized religion do not take the church teachings literal. Church's and the leaders of churches are like government and politicians...they do not listen to the people they are to serve. In many religions, people are trying to enact social change...
Thanks. I actually don't talk to her. We briefly talked in class at university and I was kind of attracted to her and our eyes would meet from time to time on campus along with a smile on her face. She keeps popping up on suggested friends on Facebook due to having a mutual friend. Not sure if worth sending her a friend request and taking it from there.
“Let's start at the very beginning A very good place to start” Send her a friend request on FB!
I agree with the others. If you‘ve never even talked to her it’s way too early to think about religion. I kinda thought you knew said person. I disagree on the Facebook friend request however. At least one without any comment! It’s so impersonal and looks careless. If you’re too shy to talk to her at least accompany the request with some nice words.
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mickeyrat
up my ass, like Chadwick was up his Posts: 35,802
move on. assumption, projection and doubt. too much to set aside in the slim hope of even a friendship much less a romantic relationship.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
move on. assumption, projection and doubt. too much to set aside in the slim hope of even a friendship much less a romantic relationship.
I agree. You will struggle to meet someone if you always judge. Its best to have an open mind, if the topic of religion comes up, discuss...otherwise I would wait a while. A lot of religious people a lot more open-minded than some think.
Detroit 2000, Detroit 2003 1-2, Grand Rapids VFC 2004, Philly 2005, Grand Rapids 2006, Detroit 2006, Cleveland 2006, Lollapalooza 2007, Detroit Eddie Solo 2011, Detroit 2014, Chicago 2016 1-2, Chicago 2018 1-2, Ohana Encore 2021 1-2, Chicago Eddie/Earthlings 2022 1-2, Nashville 2022, St. Louis 2022
Ask her if she likes Pearl Jam, if she says no, never talk to her again. My biggest regret in life. Small talk first. See if you have something in common, ask her out to dinner, a concert, or drinks.
Detroit 2000, Detroit 2003 1-2, Grand Rapids VFC 2004, Philly 2005, Grand Rapids 2006, Detroit 2006, Cleveland 2006, Lollapalooza 2007, Detroit Eddie Solo 2011, Detroit 2014, Chicago 2016 1-2, Chicago 2018 1-2, Ohana Encore 2021 1-2, Chicago Eddie/Earthlings 2022 1-2, Nashville 2022, St. Louis 2022
Talk to her personally and stop overthinking. Forget all your prejudices, how could she feel comfortable, if you already yet do not believe that it could work? Be open! Give her a chance...
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mickeyrat
up my ass, like Chadwick was up his Posts: 35,802
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I would imagine someone that actively participates in religious activities on a University level doesn’t take their faith lightly. If their just going to church on weekends or holidays that’s a different ball game. You need to find someone you have a lot in common with imo. After the initial attraction and new relationship fun, what’s left? If you have other areas that you have in common with the person that could override the religion thing. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, so you got to put yourself out there and accept that rejection will happen.
Detroit 2000, Detroit 2003 1-2, Grand Rapids VFC 2004, Philly 2005, Grand Rapids 2006, Detroit 2006, Cleveland 2006, Lollapalooza 2007, Detroit Eddie Solo 2011, Detroit 2014, Chicago 2016 1-2, Chicago 2018 1-2, Ohana Encore 2021 1-2, Chicago Eddie/Earthlings 2022 1-2, Nashville 2022, St. Louis 2022
Why not just start by asking her how's it going with her studies etc? If she accepts your friend request. Ask about what you have in common/your background. Something that would come natural after you stumbled upon her on Facebook and thought "oh, we should be friends on here".
Otherwise this has worked as an ice breaker for me (in different real life situations):
"So what do we really think off KISS' 1980s period?"
And this one got me reported to HR:
"Funny thing, you have the same name as the first victim in A Nightmare on Elm Street"
Post edited by Spiritual_Chaos on
"Mostly I think that people react sensitively because they know you’ve got a point"
The friend request thing is no big deal, isn’t that the whole point of Facebook? If that’s what makes you feel more comfortable to make small talk or start a conversation, go for it. You go to the same University, perfect topic to start a conversation.
Detroit 2000, Detroit 2003 1-2, Grand Rapids VFC 2004, Philly 2005, Grand Rapids 2006, Detroit 2006, Cleveland 2006, Lollapalooza 2007, Detroit Eddie Solo 2011, Detroit 2014, Chicago 2016 1-2, Chicago 2018 1-2, Ohana Encore 2021 1-2, Chicago Eddie/Earthlings 2022 1-2, Nashville 2022, St. Louis 2022
Thank you all for the advice. I'll think about it. I don't think she's into rock music, many her age at my university don't know any of the band I like. It's all modern pop. Thank you Mickey for the kind words.
Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
Thank you all for the advice. I'll think about it. I don't think she's into rock music, many her age at my university don't know any of the band I like. It's all modern pop. Thank you Mickey for the kind words.
As in, you don't having much to talk about with someone if not Rock?
or
As in, you don't see yourself eating breakfast together with someone and not having Dokken on in the background?
"Mostly I think that people react sensitively because they know you’ve got a point"
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mickeyrat
up my ass, like Chadwick was up his Posts: 35,802
pretty sure its a wise move to not taking dating advice from someone who cant evennhook up with agnes for coffee.....
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Thank you all for the advice. I'll think about it. I don't think she's into rock music, many her age at my university don't know any of the band I like. It's all modern pop. Thank you Mickey for the kind words.
As in, you don't having much to talk about with someone if not Rock?
or
As in, you don't see yourself eating breakfast together with someone and not having Dokken on in the background?
Nah, was just an observation.
Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
Thank you all for the advice. I'll think about it. I don't think she's into rock music, many her age at my university don't know any of the band I like. It's all modern pop. Thank you Mickey for the kind words.
As in, you don't having much to talk about with someone if not Rock?
or
As in, you don't see yourself eating breakfast together with someone and not having Dokken on in the background?
Nah, was just an observation.
I'm meeting someone now who doesn't care about Pearl Jam one bit (literally zero) and who's favorite artist is:
I mean... I'm used to dating/hanging around/being together with people who are at least in the same ocean of music taste, whether it be Pearl Jam, or Nine Inch Nails, Leonard Cohen, Tegan and Sara etc. At least close enough that you can converse about music and go to the same concerts, and slowly by osmosis force them into humming Pearl jam.
But in the end. Doesn't matter enough to not go for it. Or diss her later for it, after you have actually interacted with her. But my guess is you are looking for any reasons not to friend request?
Go make yourself a fruity drink with Absolut Vodka and then just friend request. Just ask her "hey, been a while - how's your studies going? you think Edward Furlong will have more than a cameo in the new Terminator movie?"
"Mostly I think that people react sensitively because they know you’ve got a point"
Haha I'll see. We didn't really chat, other than a quick hello. It seemed she made the effort twice with me by sitting on the same table as me and we had a quick small talk. I'm always a mute at university and try to keep to myself. I recently met a woman I met on Facebook and she's a huge techno/trance music fan. She's into taking ecstasy tablets. It made me say no to a further date (if our first meet was even considered a date).
Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
Comments
A very good place to start”
Send her a friend request on FB!
I disagree on the Facebook friend request however. At least one without any comment! It’s so impersonal and looks careless. If you’re too shy to talk to her at least accompany the request with some nice words.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
Detroit 2000, Detroit 2003 1-2, Grand Rapids VFC 2004, Philly 2005, Grand Rapids 2006, Detroit 2006, Cleveland 2006, Lollapalooza 2007, Detroit Eddie Solo 2011, Detroit 2014, Chicago 2016 1-2, Chicago 2018 1-2, Ohana Encore 2021 1-2, Chicago Eddie/Earthlings 2022 1-2, Nashville 2022, St. Louis 2022
Small talk first. See if you have something in common, ask her out to dinner, a concert, or drinks.
Detroit 2000, Detroit 2003 1-2, Grand Rapids VFC 2004, Philly 2005, Grand Rapids 2006, Detroit 2006, Cleveland 2006, Lollapalooza 2007, Detroit Eddie Solo 2011, Detroit 2014, Chicago 2016 1-2, Chicago 2018 1-2, Ohana Encore 2021 1-2, Chicago Eddie/Earthlings 2022 1-2, Nashville 2022, St. Louis 2022
I’m just learning the emojis and lovin’ it
Talk to her personally and stop overthinking. Forget all your prejudices, how could she feel comfortable, if you already yet do not believe that it could work?
Be open! Give her a chance...
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
You need to find someone you have a lot in common with imo. After the initial attraction and new relationship fun, what’s left? If you have other areas that you have in common with the person that could override the religion thing.
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, so you got to put yourself out there and accept that rejection will happen.
Detroit 2000, Detroit 2003 1-2, Grand Rapids VFC 2004, Philly 2005, Grand Rapids 2006, Detroit 2006, Cleveland 2006, Lollapalooza 2007, Detroit Eddie Solo 2011, Detroit 2014, Chicago 2016 1-2, Chicago 2018 1-2, Ohana Encore 2021 1-2, Chicago Eddie/Earthlings 2022 1-2, Nashville 2022, St. Louis 2022
Otherwise this has worked as an ice breaker for me (in different real life situations):
"So what do we really think off KISS' 1980s period?"
And this one got me reported to HR:
"Funny thing, you have the same name as the first victim in A Nightmare on Elm Street"
Detroit 2000, Detroit 2003 1-2, Grand Rapids VFC 2004, Philly 2005, Grand Rapids 2006, Detroit 2006, Cleveland 2006, Lollapalooza 2007, Detroit Eddie Solo 2011, Detroit 2014, Chicago 2016 1-2, Chicago 2018 1-2, Ohana Encore 2021 1-2, Chicago Eddie/Earthlings 2022 1-2, Nashville 2022, St. Louis 2022
I don't think she's into rock music, many her age at my university don't know any of the band I like. It's all modern pop.
Thank you Mickey for the kind words.
or
As in, you don't see yourself eating breakfast together with someone and not having Dokken on in the background?
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I mean... I'm used to dating/hanging around/being together with people who are at least in the same ocean of music taste, whether it be Pearl Jam, or Nine Inch Nails, Leonard Cohen, Tegan and Sara etc. At least close enough that you can converse about music and go to the same concerts, and slowly by osmosis force them into humming Pearl jam.
But in the end. Doesn't matter enough to not go for it. Or diss her later for it, after you have actually interacted with her. But my guess is you are looking for any reasons not to friend request?
Go make yourself a fruity drink with Absolut Vodka and then just friend request. Just ask her "hey, been a while - how's your studies going? you think Edward Furlong will have more than a cameo in the new Terminator movie?"
I recently met a woman I met on Facebook and she's a huge techno/trance music fan. She's into taking ecstasy tablets.
It made me say no to a further date (if our first meet was even considered a date).