Should I ask Agnes out on a date?

Spiritual_Chaos

darwinstheory said:

Spiritual_Chaos said:

What are we talking about in this thread nowadays? 

Did you man up yet and meet for drinks? Your work deadline has come and long gone.

I went home to my hometown resting up from surgery with antibiotics so I'm not in the same city and I'm not allowed to drink right now.

rgambs

Thoughts_Arrive said:

LongestRoad said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

LongestRoad said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

How girls feel when I try to get to know them...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlkUmmnAyy8

Are you trying to get to know them with a light sabre ? etc.??  I’m not sure what this is showing? 

Just showing that every girl is frightened of me. Makes me feel like I am a movie villain.

Is it possible you feel this because you may be over analyzing yourself and your feelings internally and vocalizing everything you’re analyzing about yourself and are you analyzing everything the girls are saying and doing? 

It's because women avoid me. If they see me on campus at university they try sneak past or pretend they didn't see me.
One time in a lecture, the fold down desk on my chair was broken so I had to move to the seat next to me so I could write notes during the lecture. The girl next to me then moved one chair over, there was one chair empty between us but she still moved. Like wtf? Am I that creepy? Do I ooze scary Kylo Ren intimidation?

I don't mean to call you a liar or delusional, but I really doubt this description is accurate.
Your perception is being skewed by preconceived bias.

I'm in a very happy and healthy marriage, but I'm pretty needy both physically and emotionally.  Sometimes when I get rejected (rejection is a normal part of a relationship btw) I get to feeling downright dejected and then I start perceiving all sorts of rejections that are entirely unintended and often complete fabricated.  Even from the literal other side of the planet I'm certain that's what is happening with you.  
It's absolutely normal for strangers and loose acquaintances to avoid eye contact and conversation in public.  It's not because you frighten or disgust anyone, it's because they got shit to do and can't stop to talk to everyone they know.  My wife would have scooted down away from you too, most people aren't all that extroverted.

OffSheGoes35

No

Why are you dismissing the posts about going to counseling? After all, aren't you going to school to be a counselor, Thoughts_Arrive?

OffSheGoes35

No

Or therapist, I mean.

Thoughts_Arrive

Yes

Who says I am dismissing the posts?

bootlegger10

Yes

I'm still interested in the Agnes saga and want to hear more.  I would pay for Agnes's Ten Club membership so she can take part in the conversation.

mcgruff10

Yes

bootlegger10 said:

I'm still interested in the Agnes saga and want to hear more.  I would pay for Agnes's Ten Club membership so she can take part in the conversation.

I’d like to be invited to the wedding. 

Wobbie

No

I don’t give a fat rat’s ass what you do.

darwinstheory

Yes

mcgruff10 said:

bootlegger10 said:

I'm still interested in the Agnes saga and want to hear more.  I would pay for Agnes's Ten Club membership so she can take part in the conversation.

I’d like to be invited to the wedding. 

Don't be so modest. You're going to be the matron of honor, aren't you? 

mcgruff10

Yes

darwinstheory said:

mcgruff10 said:

bootlegger10 said:

I'm still interested in the Agnes saga and want to hear more.  I would pay for Agnes's Ten Club membership so she can take part in the conversation.

I’d like to be invited to the wedding. 

Don't be so modest. You're going to be the matron of honor, aren't you? 

Agnes is actually my cousin and I hate to spoil it but  I ve already been asked. My speech is in the works. 

lastexitlondon

Yes

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

LongestRoad said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

LongestRoad said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

How girls feel when I try to get to know them...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wlkUmmnAyy8

Are you trying to get to know them with a light sabre ? etc.??  I’m not sure what this is showing? 

Just showing that every girl is frightened of me. Makes me feel like I am a movie villain.

Is it possible you feel this because you may be over analyzing yourself and your feelings internally and vocalizing everything you’re analyzing about yourself and are you analyzing everything the girls are saying and doing? 

It's because women avoid me. If they see me on campus at university they try sneak past or pretend they didn't see me.
One time in a lecture, the fold down desk on my chair was broken so I had to move to the seat next to me so I could write notes during the lecture. The girl next to me then moved one chair over, there was one chair empty between us but she still moved. Like wtf? Am I that creepy? Do I ooze scary Kylo Ren intimidation?

I don't mean to call you a liar or delusional, but I really doubt this description is accurate.
Your perception is being skewed by preconceived bias.

I'm in a very happy and healthy marriage, but I'm pretty needy both physically and emotionally.  Sometimes when I get rejected (rejection is a normal part of a relationship btw) I get to feeling downright dejected and then I start perceiving all sorts of rejections that are entirely unintended and often complete fabricated.  Even from the literal other side of the planet I'm certain that's what is happening with you.  
It's absolutely normal for strangers and loose acquaintances to avoid eye contact and conversation in public.  It's not because you frighten or disgust anyone, it's because they got shit to do and can't stop to talk to everyone they know.  My wife would have scooted down away from you too, most people aren't all that extroverted.

I agree with the rejection even in a marriage or relationship . It's part if everyone's life

dudeman

mcgruff10 said:

darwinstheory said:

mcgruff10 said:

bootlegger10 said:

I'm still interested in the Agnes saga and want to hear more.  I would pay for Agnes's Ten Club membership so she can take part in the conversation.

I’d like to be invited to the wedding. 

Don't be so modest. You're going to be the matron of honor, aren't you? 

Agnes is actually my cousin and I hate to spoil it but  I ve already been asked. My speech is in the works. 

Don't forget to include a healty dose of quotes from Riot Act.

lastexitlondon

Yes

1st dance ..you are

Force Of Nature

So advice on this situation...
I really like this girl.  Problem is over the last year we have become like best friends, I'm proper in the friend zone.
We also work in the same office and I've heard her say she'd never data a co-worker.

I've always thought of her as a friend but in the last couple weeks I've realised I like her more than just a friend, especially when I've seen her flirt with other guys.
I don't want to say anything as I'm convinced she doesn't feel the same and it will ruin our friendship.

Anyone been in a similar situation where they've fallen for a friend?
Am I best in trying to wait it out and get over this?

bootlegger10

Yes

I've only been in one relationship with a coworker but we weren't good friends going into it.  Lasted a few months and then fizzled out.  In the last couple of years at my office we have had about five or so work relationships turn into marriages or trending that way, so it definitely is doable.  People work so much these days so pretty natural to have relationships at work. 

Are you in the same group at work (i.e., working together on projects) or have different roles where you don't really have to interact on a daily basis?   I assume you aren't her boss or vice versa (gotta tread carefully if so).   

I'll let others with more work relationship experience respond with advice but hopefully asking something to the effect of "would you like to go out on a date?" versus "I've been madly in love with you for the last six months" won't ruin the friendship if she says no. 

 

mcgruff10

Yes

Force Of Nature said:

So advice on this situation...
I really like this girl.  Problem is over the last year we have become like best friends, I'm proper in the friend zone.
We also work in the same office and I've heard her say she'd never data a co-worker.

I've always thought of her as a friend but in the last couple weeks I've realised I like her more than just a friend, especially when I've seen her flirt with other guys.
I don't want to say anything as I'm convinced she doesn't feel the same and it will ruin our friendship.

Anyone been in a similar situation where they've fallen for a friend?
Am I best in trying to wait it out and get over this?

I worked with a woman for four years, we became really good friends.  Long story short, we were both going through a divorce and I asked her out to dinner.  We ve now been married for over six years and things are awesome. My advice: you only got one shot at this. The worst she can say is no. Five years from me noe don’t want to second yourself on whether or not you should have asked that woman out.  

dudeman

Just ask.

It's better to regret something you did than something you didn't do.

Butthole Surfers?

dudeman

Also, almost 1,000 posts in this thread!

bootlegger10

Yes

Agnes is aware of the thread right?  Has she read it?  

mcgruff10

Yes

dudeman said:

Also, almost 1,000 posts in this thread!

A slight curve ball here and there but overall a very amazing thread.