Creepy/Weird guy at the gym

Thoughts_Arrive

I got back and lucky he wasn't there.
I hate worrying if he will be there as I drive to the gym, it sucks.
I was loving it until this guy signed up at the gym.
The other day I walked past him twice and tried to avoid eye contact, the second time I noticed he looked angry.
Then behind me he was on a stepper machine and kept looking at me, that is when he then hopped onto the treadmill next to me.

oftenreading

Nothing requires you to talk to people you don't want to talk to. Nothing requires you to stay on a treadmill if he hops on the one next to you and won't leave you alone.

Your friend's suggestion of what to say sounds like a good one, but you can keep it even briefer if you wish; just say "I'm here to focus on my work out". And then do that. If he doesn't leave leave you alone, if he follows you to another area of the gym or another machine, then feel free to tell the gym staff about it.

The gym is important to you. Don't let him ruin it. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He'll move on to another "victim".

Thoughts_Arrive

oftenreading said:

Nothing requires you to talk to people you don't want to talk to. Nothing requires you to stay on a treadmill if he hops on the one next to you and won't leave you alone.

Your friend's suggestion of what to say sounds like a good one, but you can keep it even briefer if you wish; just say "I'm here to focus on my work out". And then do that. If he doesn't leave leave you alone, if he follows you to another area of the gym or another machine, then feel free to tell the gym staff about it.

The gym is important to you. Don't let him ruin it. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He'll move on to another "victim".

He looks like a psycho, he has these crazy eyes when he looks around.
What if he punches me or worse, or damages my car in the parking.
My friend told me to report it discreetly to the management but I am worried he will figure out it was me once they have a word to him.

Thoughts_Arrive

The I fkn hate lesbians comment, he was angry, I didn't respond, what can I say.
I wad offended, I feel like I could have lied and said 'I have a lesbian friend/family member and I find that offensive' but I don't want to get into an ugly situation with the guy.

oftenreading

Thoughts_Arrive said:

oftenreading said:

Nothing requires you to talk to people you don't want to talk to. Nothing requires you to stay on a treadmill if he hops on the one next to you and won't leave you alone.

Your friend's suggestion of what to say sounds like a good one, but you can keep it even briefer if you wish; just say "I'm here to focus on my work out". And then do that. If he doesn't leave leave you alone, if he follows you to another area of the gym or another machine, then feel free to tell the gym staff about it.

The gym is important to you. Don't let him ruin it. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He'll move on to another "victim".

He looks like a psycho, he has these crazy eyes when he looks around.
What if he punches me or worse, or damages my car in the parking.
My friend told me to report it discreetly to the management but I am worried he will figure out it was me once they have a word to him.

Have you seen him punch anyone? Have you seen him threaten anyone? If not, I don't know why you would assume he's going to.

hedonist

What is to report? Guy chats with you, you're not into it. Say as much. Speaking your mind with honesty and maybe kindness too isn't tantamount to being an asshole.

Wish I knew what else to say beyond some good and sage advice given here. And really, no need to let your mind lead you on those "what if" roads. I recall you being down them before. Surely there are some coping methods at hand.

It's really OK to stand up for yourself when warranted. Give it a go. The first step may be the hardest but it's also the most necessary.

And it's part of this life.

So go get 'em.

No Coder

oftenreading said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

oftenreading said:

Nothing requires you to talk to people you don't want to talk to. Nothing requires you to stay on a treadmill if he hops on the one next to you and won't leave you alone.

Your friend's suggestion of what to say sounds like a good one, but you can keep it even briefer if you wish; just say "I'm here to focus on my work out". And then do that. If he doesn't leave leave you alone, if he follows you to another area of the gym or another machine, then feel free to tell the gym staff about it.

The gym is important to you. Don't let him ruin it. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He'll move on to another "victim".

He looks like a psycho, he has these crazy eyes when he looks around.
What if he punches me or worse, or damages my car in the parking.
My friend told me to report it discreetly to the management but I am worried he will figure out it was me once they have a word to him.

Have you seen him punch anyone? Have you seen him threaten anyone? If not, I don't know why you would assume he's going to.

If he is intimidating to the OP, and they are obviously not comfortable around them, I don't think that is an unreasonable jump. They haven't been accused of doing that, it was just a what if....
I'd personally try the polite "I'm at the gym for some alone time and to work out. No offense, but I really enjoy the solitude of working out by myself" method and if that isn't taken the right way, go see Gym management.

oftenreading

No Coder said:

oftenreading said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

oftenreading said:

Nothing requires you to talk to people you don't want to talk to. Nothing requires you to stay on a treadmill if he hops on the one next to you and won't leave you alone.

Your friend's suggestion of what to say sounds like a good one, but you can keep it even briefer if you wish; just say "I'm here to focus on my work out". And then do that. If he doesn't leave leave you alone, if he follows you to another area of the gym or another machine, then feel free to tell the gym staff about it.

The gym is important to you. Don't let him ruin it. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He'll move on to another "victim".

He looks like a psycho, he has these crazy eyes when he looks around.
What if he punches me or worse, or damages my car in the parking.
My friend told me to report it discreetly to the management but I am worried he will figure out it was me once they have a word to him.

Have you seen him punch anyone? Have you seen him threaten anyone? If not, I don't know why you would assume he's going to.

If he is intimidating to the OP, and they are obviously not comfortable around them, I don't think that is an unreasonable jump. They haven't been accused of doing that, it was just a what if....
I'd personally try the polite "I'm at the gym for some alone time and to work out. No offense, but I really enjoy the solitude of working out by myself" method and if that isn't taken the right way, go see Gym management.

Except that's exactly what most everyone else has suggested and what TA doesn't want to do, due to feeling intimidated.

TA, if you don't want to speak to him, and you don't want to speak to the gym staff, and you don't want to stop going to the gym but you don't want him speaking to you, what are you willing to do?

Thoughts_Arrive

oftenreading said:

No Coder said:

oftenreading said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

oftenreading said:

Nothing requires you to talk to people you don't want to talk to. Nothing requires you to stay on a treadmill if he hops on the one next to you and won't leave you alone.

Your friend's suggestion of what to say sounds like a good one, but you can keep it even briefer if you wish; just say "I'm here to focus on my work out". And then do that. If he doesn't leave leave you alone, if he follows you to another area of the gym or another machine, then feel free to tell the gym staff about it.

The gym is important to you. Don't let him ruin it. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He'll move on to another "victim".

He looks like a psycho, he has these crazy eyes when he looks around.
What if he punches me or worse, or damages my car in the parking.
My friend told me to report it discreetly to the management but I am worried he will figure out it was me once they have a word to him.

Have you seen him punch anyone? Have you seen him threaten anyone? If not, I don't know why you would assume he's going to.

If he is intimidating to the OP, and they are obviously not comfortable around them, I don't think that is an unreasonable jump. They haven't been accused of doing that, it was just a what if....
I'd personally try the polite "I'm at the gym for some alone time and to work out. No offense, but I really enjoy the solitude of working out by myself" method and if that isn't taken the right way, go see Gym management.

Except that's exactly what most everyone else has suggested and what TA doesn't want to do, due to feeling intimidated.

TA, if you don't want to speak to him, and you don't want to speak to the gym staff, and you don't want to stop going to the gym but you don't want him speaking to you, what are you willing to do?

I don't know, just put up with it, fake nice to him.

Thoughts_Arrive

oftenreading said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

oftenreading said:

Nothing requires you to talk to people you don't want to talk to. Nothing requires you to stay on a treadmill if he hops on the one next to you and won't leave you alone.

Your friend's suggestion of what to say sounds like a good one, but you can keep it even briefer if you wish; just say "I'm here to focus on my work out". And then do that. If he doesn't leave leave you alone, if he follows you to another area of the gym or another machine, then feel free to tell the gym staff about it.

The gym is important to you. Don't let him ruin it. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He'll move on to another "victim".

He looks like a psycho, he has these crazy eyes when he looks around.
What if he punches me or worse, or damages my car in the parking.
My friend told me to report it discreetly to the management but I am worried he will figure out it was me once they have a word to him.

Have you seen him punch anyone? Have you seen him threaten anyone? If not, I don't know why you would assume he's going to.

No, but he looks like a psycho, he's always frowning and the glare in his eye.
I think he could be on some drug like meth or cocaine.

Thoughts_Arrive

hedonist said:

What is to report? Guy chats with you, you're not into it. Say as much. Speaking your mind with honesty and maybe kindness too isn't tantamount to being an asshole.

Wish I knew what else to say beyond some good and sage advice given here. And really, no need to let your mind lead you on those "what if" roads. I recall you being down them before. Surely there are some coping methods at hand.

It's really OK to stand up for yourself when warranted. Give it a go. The first step may be the hardest but it's also the most necessary.

And it's part of this life.

So go get 'em.

The fact that out of a whole room full of treadmills to choose from he chooses the one next to me.
Doesn't that just sound creepy?
Noone does that at the gym, people like their personal space.

deadendp

Thoughts Arrive,

No disrespect but it seems as though when you have a complication and you ask for advice, everything anyone suggest will never work. There is always a list of why things won't work. (Not just this situation.)

It seems that this guy scares you to death. You are afraid that roid rage, meth rage or his hot pot of crazy will whoop your ass and I'm sorry for that. Your gym experience shouldn't be like that. You shouldn't have to look over your shoulder as you are working out. Ultimately, change is up to you since he just doesn't get it.

Headphones might be an easy place to start. You don't even have to listen to music. Just looking like you are using them will deter most people.

buck502000

2-feign-reluctance

@Thoughts_Arrive

Headphones are the way to go. If he sees you wearing them, he won't talk to you nor will anyone else. I use these & they are AMAZING.

http://www.ebay.com/itm/like/262584868338?lpid=82&chn=ps&ul_ref=http%3A%2F%2Frover.ebay.com%2Frover%2F1%2F711-117182-37290-0%2F2%3Fmtid%3D1588%26kwid%3D1%26crlp%3D148551537311_324272%26itemid%3D262584868338%26targetid%3D186358913049%26rpc%3D0.25%26rpc_upld_id%3D102695%26device%3Dm%26mpre%3Dhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.ebay.com%252Fulk%252Fitm%252Flike%252F262584868338%253Flpid%253D82%2526chn%253Dps%26adtype%3Dpla%26googleloc%3D9023535%26poi%3D%26campaignid%3D672881482%26adgroupid%3D34355259813%26rlsatarget%3Dpla-186358913049%26gclid%3DCK6J16v__dECFQi5wAodv6MF0A%26srcrot%3D711-117182-37290-0%26rvr_id%3D1164668976337&ul_noapp=true

SmallestOceans

Get a gym restraining order lol

Malroth

ledvedderman said:

buck502000 said:

Are you that good-looking?

Who needs a creepy dude at the gym making weird comments when you can have a dude on a Pearl Jam message board making equally creepy comments and taking your situation lightly?

ledvedderman said:

buck502000 said:

Are you that good-looking?

Who needs a creepy dude at the gym making weird comments when you can have a dude on a Pearl Jam message board making equally creepy comments and taking your situation lightly?

No discouragement intended. I think the depression may be the root concern, if that was gone maybe you could see more of the humorous side of the story. Maybe even make a friend.

northerndragon

Halifax2TheMax said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Creepy/Weird that always tries to chat with me comes and uses the treadmill next to me at the gym when there are 10 other treadmills to choose from and tries to have a chat with me. "Do you like Football (Aussie Rules)/Soccer?" (I lied and said NO to both sports questions to try and end the conversation) "Do you watch Married at first sight?" "Fucking Lesbians they make me sick" "I've been here for 4 hours, you know, to get the blood up"

That was some of what went on the other day.
I was alone in the treadmill room in the gym and he comes next to me. He also kept checking out my screen to see what pace I was running and at the end of his run he said he could do better, like as if he was competing with me.
Previously he always says hi and wants to chat, he does this to other people to.

Should I be worried? Report him to management?

Is his name Ani?

this was my first thought as well.

dankind

https://youtu.be/_T6nUXoGapM

markymark550

Why had nobody stated the obvious? You're at the gym, so start lifting then kick his ass next time he creeps up on you.

MayDay10

Headphones are easy. Get a pair of ear buds for like 2 dollars. Hook it up to whatever portable device you have music on. If not, just run the cord into your pocket