The guy while a tool is most likely testing to see what reaction would be raised. Next time he says it say you don't need a prostitute as you are too busy banging his girl. Dipshits like this need to know they can't get your goat. Otherwise it will continue happening.
Tom Brady & Donald Trump, BFF's Fuckus rules all Rob Seattle
Here are some questions to take the unwanted attention from yourself and maybe get to the bottom of things:
1. Hey... I can't tell if you're kidding around or if you're not. When you are busting my balls... is this in good spirit or not? Do you have a problem with me? 2. Can you please tell me exactly what I have done to have you talk the way you do to me? 3. Look... if I'm doing something here that is pissing you off, can you tell me what it is? It seems as if you've taken a bit of an issue with me and if I've done something wrong... let me know so I can make it better.
Anticipate the responses- both good and bad- and be prepared to further the dialogue once it has started. For example, if the doosh says, "It just pisses me off when you give me that look whenever we talk about drinking"... have your response roughly formulated in your mind so you're not standing there stammering. Say something like, " Wow. I never even realized I was doing that. I can understand how this perception might have developed since I don't drink, but trust me... I have no issues with people and their choices if those choices aren't affecting others".
I'm not kidding when I say mentally rehearse the discussion you are preparing for. You'll catch the doosh(es) off guard and they'll have respect for you for not only standing up for yourself, but doing so in a manner that might demonstrate confidence (even though it seems as if you're lacking a bit).
Stand up for yourself, man. I know its hard, but you'll be doing cartwheels confronting these pricks.
Once you've done so... you'll always have the discussion to refer to: "Hey man... we've been through this already. You told me blah blah blah, but here you are saying blah, blah, blah. Fuck off, man. Seriously."
Still I get smart ass comments made about me. During a lunchtime walk with 3 colleagues one colleague asked if I've ever had a girlfriend and how long ago, I lied and said 2 years ago and he was shocked. Then he asked if I go to the prostitutes. The topic of conversation then shifted about how smokers apparently are productive at work as they have smoke breaks often thus get away from their desks more than non smokers. This colleague then said whilst the smokers go out for a smoke I should go to the toilet to masturbate and that I'd be good at that. He said it in a serious tone of voice. I didn't know how to react but fake laughed and called him a smart ass. I don't understand this guy in the office he is different to during lunch breaks and outside of the office. I am new and don't know what to do, they all get along well, I am on probation and don't want to rock the ship. Today has left me feeling down and ashamed of myself, I feel like I am seen as some weird freak.
Dude, I wish I worked at your office. I'd have a field day with these schmucks. Nothing better then ripping right back at a bunch of assholes. Very therapeutical for the mind. Hang in there man.
I agree with this comment, it's worth losing your job over your rights and dignity, You can always say to him does this make your dick feel any bigger or your head now that you have tried to belittle me!!!!
I honestly would have told the guy, "no, I don't go to prostitutes, your mom gives it away for free"
The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.
Your best bet/what you should do is not allow it to bother you. If it does, don't let on to them, but advise an HR Manager.
Something about you seems to invite these kinds of people. Probably a lack of confidence. You need to fix that internally. Also, you cant give a fuck what people say or think.
There is no HR manager. I always get picked on at work, every job I've had. Fuck life.
Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
Thank you all for your advice. The office is full of homophobia too which irks me. I don't know what to do if I resign, been out of work for almost a year, the big gap and then short tenure won't look good for future job applications. And the guy teasing me always makes fun of what I bring for lunch. I will avoid him as much as possible during lunch in future, inside the office I sit near him. I am actually liking the tasks I do but not the behaviour of some.
Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
Regarding mention of building up self confidence, kind of hard when you have been verbally abused and put down by your mother since childhood and bullied throughout childhood.
Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
Regarding mention of building up self confidence, kind of hard when you have been verbally abused and put down by your mother since childhood and bullied throughout childhood.
True , it IS hard. But at a certain point , a person has to say enough is enough. I found this stuff to be about choice in my reaction or response after accepting who, how and what I am. Teasing still stings and I get red faced. And I'm 47 yrs old next month!!!! But fuck you if I dont have value and am just as necessary as anyone else. No better , no less but an important part of the greater whole.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I don't know how to stand up for myself. I just let people keep shitting on me and I am too timid and nervous around others. I wish I could make it stop. The anti-depressants I take have not fixed this issue with me.
Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I don't know how to stand up for myself. I just let people keep shitting on me and I am too timid and nervous around others. I wish I could make it stop. The anti-depressants I take have not fixed this issue with me.
Bullies tend to pick up on who is timid and nervous and that's what at least that one guy seems to be. Easier said than done but realize their opinions don't really matter. Bullies get off on making a person feel uncomfortable. try to not let it bother you or at least try not to let it show it bothers you. Also don't try to force yourself to 'fit in'. don't go on walks at lunch because that is what others do if you are not into it. just focus on your wok minute-by-minute. stay at your desk more. no reason to share personal stuff with people you just met. let them learn about you over a longer period of time. prove yourself as a worker before worrying about fitting in.
It is so much easier just to say "get confidence" than actually gaining it... especially when it seems ingrained for a long time.
I don't know what treatment you have sought out for it, but if you haven't done so, you should see a shrink... if you have been seeing one and feel that the medication is still your best bet, I would go find another one.
It is very tough to get confidence. I lacked it throughout a decent portion of my teens and 20s. For me, it was all about individualizing myself and learning that the locus of control was internal. I control the things that happen with me. Self-value, all that. Outward appearance too. Start eating well and exercising each and every day. It sounds hokey, but exercise itself stimulates your brain and nervous system to feel good and comfortable. Other hobbies too that may interest you. Start hiking or camping or something. That is some great time with your thoughts.
Regarding mention of building up self confidence, kind of hard when you have been verbally abused and put down by your mother since childhood and bullied throughout childhood.
Wow, not too often I read through an entire thread but this is one that's worth it. Where do I start.....well many have given great suggestions, I'll try and give my take. It's quite easy for many to give all sorts of suggestions when they are not in your shoes at that quite unusual office.
I would start with YOU. You are the that's important here, I've been picked on as a youth, bullied and ostracized from my schoolmates for my looks, dress wear and intelligence. This went on for over a year and the way I got out the mess was FINALLY standing up for myself with my own self confidence. This was done not through someone else's urging but the time came where I said enough was enough. I on my own figured out what to do to make these kids stop and it appears T_A you have some kiddish behavior in your office. I picked out the weakest one of the bullying group and I beat the living day lights out of him. They never bothered me again after that and some in later years became my friends including the one I beat up.
Now im not suggesting you beat up a co worker or any of that kind of act but at some point one must stand up for oneself even if it's to see what kind of reaction one will get. If not this kiddish behavior will continue. You can do this in the ways others have suggested in confronting your coworkers or by looking inward unto yourself. Done so by finding something, anything that makes YOU feel good about yourself, makes you feel gay (happy that is), or the thing that puts you on top of the world from DOWN UNDER. Today for me it is cycling, for you it could anything from let's say holding a plank position, making eye contact intensely. Studying your job away from work to the point of knowing forwards and backwards. They should appriciate you getting to know the little things about your job.
These small things and others can or should lead to bettering your confidence to down the road deal with those who you work with. Hang in there, NEVER quit this job they're others in FAR worse situations and conditions.....getting through this will give you a much needed boast in job experience as you move forward in this life.
Peace
*We CAN bomb the World to pieces, but we CAN'T bomb it into PEACE*...Michael Franti
*MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
.....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti
*The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)
I don't know how to stand up for myself. I just let people keep shitting on me and I am too timid and nervous around others. I wish I could make it stop. The anti-depressants I take have not fixed this issue with me.
Anti-depressants on their own will not change your personality or the way your automatically react to situations. What they can do is help with some of the more biologically-based symptoms - they can help raise someone's mood, help with sleep, reduce physical symptoms of anxiety like racing heart and trembling hands, and reduce intrusive thought, to name a few. These improvements alone can make it easier to do the hard work that is required to change your self-talk and behaviour, but it is still a lot of work to alter the patterns of a lifetime.
It's obviously easy for us, across the world and behind our keyboards, to tell you what you should and shouldn't do, and I do apologize if what I say comes across as critical as it's not meant to. Just be really cautious when you start hearing yourself tell yourself what you can or can't do. These changes are possible, albeit difficult.
my small self... like a book amongst the many on a shelf
I think it's like that school bully who's always demanding your lunch money. All is gravy for him until that one day you say "fuck you" and stand up for yourself. He'll leave you alone. God damn I'm so tempted to fly to your work and smash these guys in the face for you. They sound like complete dueshebags that need a good ass whipping.
I think it's like that school bully who's always demanding your lunch money. All is gravy for him until that one day you say "fuck you" and stand up for yourself. He'll leave you alone. God damn I'm so tempted to fly to your work and smash these guys in the face for you. They sound like complete dueshebags that need a good ass whipping.
Sometimes an allies are needed. I'm surprised nobody from there hasn't observed what has been going and decided they've seen enough.
It makes me think that perhaps some of the teasing is simple 'guy humour' that is taken too seriously (I could be wrong).
You need to take control of the situation my friend: confront in as least confrontational manner as possible (I gave you some suggestions on how to do so in the form of initiating dialogue with some questioning strategies). Further, for the long term, help yourself be more confident: I agree with May's suggestion to develop yourself physically with exercise. Don't delay doing this either: with a solid workout regime... I guarantee you won't be saying, "Fuk. What a waste of time that was " one year from now. The benefits of exercise are too numerous to list here, but needed by you.
I think it's like that school bully who's always demanding your lunch money. All is gravy for him until that one day you say "fuck you" and stand up for yourself. He'll leave you alone. God damn I'm so tempted to fly to your work and smash these guys in the face for you. They sound like complete dueshebags that need a good ass whipping.
I think it's like that school bully who's always demanding your lunch money. All is gravy for him until that one day you say "fuck you" and stand up for yourself. He'll leave you alone. God damn I'm so tempted to fly to your work and smash these guys in the face for you. They sound like complete dueshebags that need a good ass whipping.
Sometimes an allies are needed. I'm surprised nobody from there hasn't observed what has been going and decided they've seen enough.
It makes me think that perhaps some of the teasing is simple 'guy humour' that is taken too seriously (I could be wrong).
You need to take control of the situation my friend: confront in as least confrontational manner as possible (I gave you some suggestions on how to do so in the form of initiating dialogue with some questioning strategies). Further, for the long term, help yourself be more confident: I agree with May's suggestion to develop yourself physically with exercise. Don't delay doing this either: with a solid workout regime... I guarantee you won't be saying, "Fuk. What a waste of time that was " one year from now. The benefits of exercise are too numerous to list here, but needed by you.
Yes I agree with the point of exercise. That's why I mentioned cycling or whatever exercise T_A likes to best he should do and do so feverishly. It may get his mind off the office and focus more unto himself which IS the key component here.
Peace
*We CAN bomb the World to pieces, but we CAN'T bomb it into PEACE*...Michael Franti
*MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
.....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti
*The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)
I think it's like that school bully who's always demanding your lunch money. All is gravy for him until that one day you say "fuck you" and stand up for yourself. He'll leave you alone. God damn I'm so tempted to fly to your work and smash these guys in the face for you. They sound like complete dueshebags that need a good ass whipping.
Sometimes an allies are needed. I'm surprised nobody from there hasn't observed what has been going and decided they've seen enough.
It makes me think that perhaps some of the teasing is simple 'guy humour' that is taken too seriously (I could be wrong).
You need to take control of the situation my friend: confront in as least confrontational manner as possible (I gave you some suggestions on how to do so in the form of initiating dialogue with some questioning strategies). Further, for the long term, help yourself be more confident: I agree with May's suggestion to develop yourself physically with exercise. Don't delay doing this either: with a solid workout regime... I guarantee you won't be saying, "Fuk. What a waste of time that was " one year from now. The benefits of exercise are too numerous to list here, but needed by you.
Yes I agree with the point of exercise. That's why I mentioned cycling or whatever exercise T_A likes to best he should do and do so feverishly. It may get his mind off the office and focus more unto himself which IS the key component here.
Peace
Physical exercise is a wonderful thing for depression and anxiety. My wife suffers from depression to the point they recommended shock therapy for her. She didn't want to do it so I used that as the reason to push her to start going to the gym with me all the time. A few weeks later she is always mentioning how much happier she feels. Much like drugs re-wire your brain so does exercise. Your body starts firing off different hormones and endorphins. It probably shouldn't replace medication (she still takes hers) but inconjunction with it this might help. Plus it will also help with self confidence. If you feel better about yourself it should help with this fuckstick and standing up to him. As others have said, prison rules apply here. Find the guy and tee the f off on him. Its the only way it will stop.
Tom Brady & Donald Trump, BFF's Fuckus rules all Rob Seattle
Can you listen to music at work? At your desk? During lunch? What I do know about you for sure is that you're a fan of the best fucking band in the world. I always feel better listening to PJ. Pop in a bootleg. Listen to VS. (get outta my fuckin' face). This could open up a positive dialogue with your coworkers. Maybe they are fans, at least casually. Maybe they will become fans. You could become the music guy in the office. If nothing else, you have great tunes to listen to.
To echo what Often said The anti-depressants aren't going to teach you to stand up for yourself. They're more for giving you solid ground to stand on. The actual act of standing up is something you have to do, but I think and I could be wrong here, that CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) is something that may help you with that. I would suggest speaking to your current shrink or finding one that does CBT and discussing it with them.
I am sorry to hear all this. It does sound like these people are just generally terrible and goes beyond the regular office banter.
That said, it sounds like you like your work and you may not win with these guys. If so, do your job and don't worry about making friends. Come in, do your job and do it well and go home.
Getting some confidence seems like a longer term thing. You seem like a good dude, keep your head up.
I think it's like that school bully who's always demanding your lunch money. All is gravy for him until that one day you say "fuck you" and stand up for yourself. He'll leave you alone. God damn I'm so tempted to fly to your work and smash these guys in the face for you. They sound like complete dueshebags that need a good ass whipping.
I'd kick in some $$ for that plane ticket.
Oh, was he talking about taking a plane? I thought he meant just flying out under his own steam, SuperNart style.
my small self... like a book amongst the many on a shelf
I think it's like that school bully who's always demanding your lunch money. All is gravy for him until that one day you say "fuck you" and stand up for yourself. He'll leave you alone. God damn I'm so tempted to fly to your work and smash these guys in the face for you. They sound like complete dueshebags that need a good ass whipping.
I'd kick in some $$ for that plane ticket.
Oh, was he talking about taking a plane? I thought he meant just flying out under his own steam, SuperNart style.
Is there anyone at your new job who makes you feel comfortable/welcome? I don't know if it's been suggested or not but maybe talk to someone else and see if they are getting the same impressions you are. They could possibly give you some advice on how to approach the person since they may know them a little better. It's easy to get down sometimes but it makes me worry for others when I see things said like life sucks. It sounds like this is a big weight on you and if you need resolution, get it in some way. Don't let it build. It could be an easy fix you aren't seeing or it it could require a major change in your situation. Either way it will probably be healthier to find out.
Here's the ultimate key TA.. You have to WANT TO CHANGE YOUR CIRCUMSTANCE. Period, or nothing will change. Everywhere you go, there you are. So no matter where you go, or what job you perform, this will continue to happen to you. Because you only seem to want to complain about it, and make excuses for why it can't change. And you can't tell ME, that it can't happen because of your past. Fuck your past. It's the past.. As in dine, already happened can't change it.. Set in stone, finished, in the books, ink has set; passed, past, over with.. PERIOD. Now. Here in the NOW. This very moment, and those moments yet to come, you CAN change. But what you really need to change is your perception of YOU. Because to be honest, I'm like a two legged dog.. I see you smile, see you stand up straight, 'acting' confident, but READ your fears like a book laid open for the public. You can hide behind your insecurities for the rest of your lifeand be miserable, or you can take your balls outta your mana's purse and change what you want about yourself. Because the only one that gets to decide who and what you become in life is you! It's not your mother's job to live your life, it's YOUR job; so quit listening to herand figure out what the fuck you want out of your life, then make a plan, and stick to it! It irks me when I just keep reading all your excuses. You have all these kind people here giving some really great advice to help you out, and you just keep sweeping it away with reasons why you can't.. I know this post seems harsh.. But it's the truth. And I just can't sit back and read anymore blubbering,' but I can't cause Mommy says I can't' bullshit excuses! YOU HAVECONVINCED YOURSELF YOU ARE NOT WORTH ANYTHING. Therefore you aren't. Want to change that?? Take your balks back, get your feet in the ground, your head out of the sand, andFUCKING MOVE FORWSRD in life!! Quit standing around looking for validation in your existence! Hour existence has purpose, but only YOU can define what that is! Now quit crying and go DO something about it!
Again, sorry this sounds so harsh, but holy FUCK it needed said!!
To be totally blunt, Thoughts Arrive, and I'm sorry, but over time I've noticed that you inevitably flat out reject every single idea that people come up with when you're asking for advice on how to deal with your problems at work, and there are a lot of ideas. You always seem to have a reason why you just can't do this, that, or the other thing. At some point, you're going to have to either just run out of gas and resign yourself to whatever is bothering you and let the downward spiral happen and see where rock bottom is (not recommended), or actually suck it up and try some stuff that might help even if it makes you really uncomfortable (definitely seems like the best option). (and I do totally realize that "sucking it up" isn't something people can do with their depression. I mean just swallow your fear and nervousness, brace yourself for whatever kind of anxiety attack might follow it, and force yourself into action. I know, easier said than done.... but do it anyway maybe?)
Post edited by PJ_Soul on
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
Comments
Fuckus rules all
Rob
Seattle
1. Hey... I can't tell if you're kidding around or if you're not. When you are busting my balls... is this in good spirit or not? Do you have a problem with me?
2. Can you please tell me exactly what I have done to have you talk the way you do to me?
3. Look... if I'm doing something here that is pissing you off, can you tell me what it is? It seems as if you've taken a bit of an issue with me and if I've done something wrong... let me know so I can make it better.
Anticipate the responses- both good and bad- and be prepared to further the dialogue once it has started. For example, if the doosh says, "It just pisses me off when you give me that look whenever we talk about drinking"... have your response roughly formulated in your mind so you're not standing there stammering. Say something like, " Wow. I never even realized I was doing that. I can understand how this perception might have developed since I don't drink, but trust me... I have no issues with people and their choices if those choices aren't affecting others".
I'm not kidding when I say mentally rehearse the discussion you are preparing for. You'll catch the doosh(es) off guard and they'll have respect for you for not only standing up for yourself, but doing so in a manner that might demonstrate confidence (even though it seems as if you're lacking a bit).
Stand up for yourself, man. I know its hard, but you'll be doing cartwheels confronting these pricks.
Once you've done so... you'll always have the discussion to refer to: "Hey man... we've been through this already. You told me blah blah blah, but here you are saying blah, blah, blah. Fuck off, man. Seriously."
- Christopher McCandless
I always get picked on at work, every job I've had.
Fuck life.
The office is full of homophobia too which irks me.
I don't know what to do if I resign, been out of work for almost a year, the big gap and then short tenure won't look good for future job applications.
And the guy teasing me always makes fun of what I bring for lunch.
I will avoid him as much as possible during lunch in future, inside the office I sit near him.
I am actually liking the tasks I do but not the behaviour of some.
And so are you.
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I just let people keep shitting on me and I am too timid and nervous around others.
I wish I could make it stop.
The anti-depressants I take have not fixed this issue with me.
I think what really stops you is fear. Lifa as it is now is known , but what about after? The great unknown.try it. Its an adventure!!!!
Not today Sir, Probably not tomorrow.............................................. bayfront arena st. pete '94
you're finally here and I'm a mess................................................... nationwide arena columbus '10
memories like fingerprints are slowly raising.................................... first niagara center buffalo '13
another man ..... moved by sleight of hand...................................... joe louis arena detroit '14
I don't know what treatment you have sought out for it, but if you haven't done so, you should see a shrink... if you have been seeing one and feel that the medication is still your best bet, I would go find another one.
It is very tough to get confidence. I lacked it throughout a decent portion of my teens and 20s. For me, it was all about individualizing myself and learning that the locus of control was internal. I control the things that happen with me. Self-value, all that. Outward appearance too. Start eating well and exercising each and every day. It sounds hokey, but exercise itself stimulates your brain and nervous system to feel good and comfortable. Other hobbies too that may interest you. Start hiking or camping or something. That is some great time with your thoughts.
I would start with YOU. You are the that's important here, I've been picked on as a youth, bullied and ostracized from my schoolmates for my looks, dress wear and intelligence. This went on for over a year and the way I got out the mess was FINALLY standing up for myself with my own self confidence. This was done not through someone else's urging but the time came where I said enough was enough. I on my own figured out what to do to make these kids stop and it appears T_A you have some kiddish behavior in your office. I picked out the weakest one of the bullying group and I beat the living day lights out of him. They never bothered me again after that and some in later years became my friends including the one I beat up.
Now im not suggesting you beat up a co worker or any of that kind of act but at some point one must stand up for oneself even if it's to see what kind of reaction one will get. If not this kiddish behavior will continue. You can do this in the ways others have suggested in confronting your coworkers or by looking inward unto yourself. Done so by finding something, anything that makes YOU feel good about yourself, makes you feel gay (happy that is), or the thing that puts you on top of the world from DOWN UNDER. Today for me it is cycling, for you it could anything from let's say holding a plank position, making eye contact intensely. Studying your job away from work to the point of knowing forwards and backwards. They should appriciate you getting to know the little things about your job.
These small things and others can or should lead to bettering your confidence to down the road deal with those who you work with. Hang in there, NEVER quit this job they're others in FAR worse situations and conditions.....getting through this will give you a much needed boast in job experience as you move forward in this life.
Peace
*MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
.....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti
*The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)
It's obviously easy for us, across the world and behind our keyboards, to tell you what you should and shouldn't do, and I do apologize if what I say comes across as critical as it's not meant to. Just be really cautious when you start hearing yourself tell yourself what you can or can't do. These changes are possible, albeit difficult.
Some really insightful comments about self - how viewed, changed, seen.
It makes me think that perhaps some of the teasing is simple 'guy humour' that is taken too seriously (I could be wrong).
You need to take control of the situation my friend: confront in as least confrontational manner as possible (I gave you some suggestions on how to do so in the form of initiating dialogue with some questioning strategies). Further, for the long term, help yourself be more confident: I agree with May's suggestion to develop yourself physically with exercise. Don't delay doing this either: with a solid workout regime... I guarantee you won't be saying, "Fuk. What a waste of time that was " one year from now. The benefits of exercise are too numerous to list here, but needed by you.
Peace
*MUSIC IS the expression of EMOTION.....and that POLITICS IS merely the DECOY of PERCEPTION*
.....song_Music & Politics....Michael Franti
*The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite INSANE*....Nikola Tesla(a man who shaped our world of electricity with his futuristic inventions)
Fuckus rules all
Rob
Seattle
LIVEFOOTSTEPS.ORG/USER/?USR=435
That said, it sounds like you like your work and you may not win with these guys. If so, do your job and don't worry about making friends. Come in, do your job and do it well and go home.
Getting some confidence seems like a longer term thing. You seem like a good dude, keep your head up.
Again, sorry this sounds so harsh, but holy FUCK it needed said!!
(and I do totally realize that "sucking it up" isn't something people can do with their depression. I mean just swallow your fear and nervousness, brace yourself for whatever kind of anxiety attack might follow it, and force yourself into action. I know, easier said than done.... but do it anyway maybe?)