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Judge not

hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524
edited March 2012 in A Moving Train
So I ask, is this possible?

I've used the expression before (and mistakenly thought I abided by it), but as I get older and wisdom adheres - I hope - in reality, do we not live our life and make decisions based on judgments?

Of others - and ourselves?

Whether based on experience, on instinct, what have you.

I do.

Some conclusions drawn mean nothing in the long run; others make you think "hmmm, not sure about this person, this deed - keep away" or "yeah, a good egg".

Thinking about a whole lot of nothing this morning, I suppose.
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    We're constantly judging, using our instinct, etc. Snap judgements are essential to our survival, whether we are judging people, situations, etc. Those that are unable to judge, be it due to cognitive problems at birth or following a brain injury, have enormous problems in daily life.

    Sometimes actions taken following our judgement stay as they are, sometimes,once one has more information or has has more time to process the info, judgement is revised.

    We judge all the time - all of us, whether one wants to admit it or not.
  • peacefrompaulpeacefrompaul Posts: 25,293
    It's human nature
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    Good judgement like good common sense...

    in this regard yes we move through life gathering information from our experiences that
    effects then our good or bad judgment

    to judge ... like to assume or generalize then base an opinion on someone
    or something without experiencing it or them

    in this regard ... we see a lot of generalizing and assuming
    something some people try to fight doing and some don't even care to
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    One doesn't always need to experience - your instinct tells you.
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    redrock wrote:
    One doesn't always need to experience - your instinct tells you.
    true especially with instant dislike
  • he still standshe still stands Posts: 2,835
    thing is, your judgment matters nothing to me. your thoughts have zero impact upon me. i couldn't care less what people think about me. i try to be a good person, to help others, to leave this place better than when i entered it... because it is simply the right thing to do, not because i gain acceptance. it seems like most people do just the opposite; they try to manipulate others' thoughts and judgments of them rather than change their actions for the better.
    Everything not forbidden is compulsory and eveything not compulsory is forbidden. You are free... free to do what the government says you can do.
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    he still stands wrote:
    thing is, your judgment matters nothing to me. your thoughts have zero impact upon me. i couldn't care less what people think about me. i try to be a good person, to help others, to leave this place better than when i entered it... because it is simply the right thing to do, not because i gain acceptance. it seems like most people do just the opposite; they try to manipulate others' thoughts and judgments of them rather than change their actions for the better.
    I like to hear others thoughts and opinions and they do impact me.
    It doesn't change how I feel about them if I feel them. I don't need to agree
    I just enjoy knowing them better.

    I love learning from others and this is where people can influence...
    the bright informative people who share knowledge, generously.
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    I think when it comes to people, judging may come as second nature at first, but changing perspective to not judging another person is certainly possible.

    We all have our issues we deal with, so I try not to over-analyze nor draw conclusions quickly. We owe each other and ourselves the benefit of the doubt without being quick to judge.
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    edited February 2012
    pandora wrote:
    he still stands wrote:
    thing is, your judgment matters nothing to me. your thoughts have zero impact upon me. i couldn't care less what people think about me. i try to be a good person, to help others, to leave this place better than when i entered it... because it is simply the right thing to do, not because i gain acceptance. it seems like most people do just the opposite; they try to manipulate others' thoughts and judgments of them rather than change their actions for the better.
    I like to hear others thoughts and opinions and they do impact me.
    It doesn't change how I feel about them if I feel them. I don't need to agree
    I just enjoy knowing them better.

    I love learning from others and this is where people can influence...
    the bright informative people who share knowledge, generously.

    People only impact and influence you when you allow them to. It is all in your control how you let people affect you and that's for the best of situations and the worst.

    This is my biggest pet peeve, that people believe that we are not in control how others affect us. You have it right, he still stands. That's a really healthy attitude!
    Post edited by Jeanwah on
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    edited February 2012
    pandora wrote:
    redrock wrote:
    One doesn't always need to experience - your instinct tells you.
    true especially with instant dislike

    ....

    Edited. Response did not belong in this thread
    Post edited by redrock on
  • hedonisthedonist Posts: 24,524
    I like this food for thought.

    I've learned - tried - to not place much weight on the opinions of others, save for those whose opinions DO hold weight, which do matter...to me.

    And he still stands, you are correct - doing the right thing because it is so. Especially when no one else is around but you.

    In the end, I will be my only judge.


    (Jeanwah, right on, with your last sentence. And I must say that your post about cynicism yesterday has been in my head since I read it. Good words.)
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    hedonist wrote:
    I like this food for thought.

    I've learned - tried - to not place much weight on the opinions of others, save for those whose opinions DO hold weight, which do matter...to me.

    And he still stands, you are correct - doing the right thing because it is so. Especially when no one else is around but you.

    In the end, I will be my only judge.


    (Jeanwah, right on, with your last sentence. And I must say that your post about cynicism yesterday has been in my head since I read it. Good words.)

    Thanks. :)
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    redrock wrote:
    pandora wrote:
    redrock wrote:
    One doesn't always need to experience - your instinct tells you.
    true especially with instant dislike

    ooOOoo... that's really not what I was thinking of, but now that you say so...... ;)
    yes I thought that was you :D
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    Jeanwah wrote:
    I think when it comes to people, judging may come as second nature at first, but changing perspective to not judging another person is certainly possible.

    What is it that they say about job interviews? It's in the first seven seconds one makes the initial impression/judgement?

    If we are talking people judging here, as long as you know who you are and you are comfortable with yourself, let others judge but be not affected by it.
  • he still standshe still stands Posts: 2,835
    where's all the christians?

    "judge not lest ye be judged"

    “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?"

    (Matthew 7)

    (a good book with sound advice isn't to be thrown in the trash heap... although i don't agree with 100% of the bible and I'm not a christian)
    Everything not forbidden is compulsory and eveything not compulsory is forbidden. You are free... free to do what the government says you can do.
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    edited February 2012
    .....

    Edited - post did not belong in this thread
    Post edited by redrock on
  • JeanwahJeanwah Posts: 6,363
    redrock wrote:
    Jeanwah wrote:
    I think when it comes to people, judging may come as second nature at first, but changing perspective to not judging another person is certainly possible.

    What is it that they say about job interviews? It's in the first seven seconds one makes the initial impression/judgement?

    If we are talking people judging here, as long as you know who you are and you are comfortable with yourself, let others judge but be not affected by it.

    Yeah, those pesky job interviews are all about judgements and first impressions...

    Exactly, I feel people judge me all the time,most people probably do. But I pretty much don't care what most people think.
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    hedonist wrote:
    I've learned - tried - to not place much weight on the opinions of others, save for those whose opinions DO hold weight, which do matter...to me.

    Exactly.
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    Being annoyed by the little things in life or by the little things others do
    leads to great frustration and negativity which eventually brings judgement calls.

    Live and let live and love even if they do drive you a little crazy :D
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    redrock wrote:
    pandora wrote:
    redrock wrote:
    ooOOoo... that's really not what I was thinking of, but now that you say so...... ;)
    yes I thought that was you :D

    :?: :?:

    So much for being 'open' and being non judgemental (as you like to say so often in your posts).

    But let's not go down that route. The thread will again turn nasty and be locked. So little do you know (oh look... I'm judging - and taking the bait...)

    No response required.
    it is not me who doesn't love ... I love you redrock and like you too :D
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    he still stands wrote:
    where's all the christians?

    "judge not lest ye be judged"

    “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?"

    (Matthew 7)

    (a good book with sound advice isn't to be thrown in the trash heap... although i don't agree with 100% of the bible and I'm not a christian)
    if we make it a religious thread it might get shut down and I think OP wasn't on that route
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    edited February 2012
    ...
    Post edited by redrock on
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    ....

    Edited. Post did not belong in this thread.
  • redrockredrock Posts: 18,341
    edited February 2012
    Edited. Though not completely deleted. Needed to get a message across.

    Let's just stop it here. Now. Don't start your little games. Take it to PM if you want.

    Sorry guys. Sorry OP. This thread was not meant to be derailed.
    Post edited by redrock on
  • he still standshe still stands Posts: 2,835
    pandora wrote:
    he still stands wrote:
    where's all the christians?

    "judge not lest ye be judged"

    “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?"

    (Matthew 7)

    (a good book with sound advice isn't to be thrown in the trash heap... although i don't agree with 100% of the bible and I'm not a christian)
    if we make it a religious thread it might get shut down and I think OP wasn't on that route

    we can't even quote the bible? i'm not making this religious... just quoting a book.
    Everything not forbidden is compulsory and eveything not compulsory is forbidden. You are free... free to do what the government says you can do.
  • he still standshe still stands Posts: 2,835
    "those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind." - the good doctor
    Everything not forbidden is compulsory and eveything not compulsory is forbidden. You are free... free to do what the government says you can do.
  • he still standshe still stands Posts: 2,835
    redrock wrote:
    hedonist wrote:
    I've learned - tried - to not place much weight on the opinions of others, save for those whose opinions DO hold weight, which do matter...to me.

    Exactly.

    meh. no. i don't care what my mother thinks. i love her to freakin' death, but if she doesn't approve, that doesn't bother me. i'll still love her unconditionally.

    my life and my actions are not for others' approval. NO ONE. i do things the way i do them for my own reasons, and i think almost all of them are selfless and "good" by any definition. so, by living by my own ideals, i naturally have the acceptance of others (which doesn't matter).
    Everything not forbidden is compulsory and eveything not compulsory is forbidden. You are free... free to do what the government says you can do.
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    he still stands wrote:
    pandora wrote:
    he still stands wrote:
    where's all the christians?

    "judge not lest ye be judged"

    “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?"

    (Matthew 7)

    (a good book with sound advice isn't to be thrown in the trash heap... although i don't agree with 100% of the bible and I'm not a christian)
    if we make it a religious thread it might get shut down and I think OP wasn't on that route

    we can't even quote the bible? i'm not making this religious... just quoting a book.
    I liked the quote I don't know many ...
    I might just be thinking eggshells after a few were locked
    and that might be wrong of me to do so
  • he still standshe still stands Posts: 2,835
    pandora wrote:
    I liked the quote I don't know many ...
    I might just be thinking eggshells after a few were locked
    and that might be wrong of me to do so

    no problem. i don't think it should be forbidden to simply quote the book. but i agree, let's not make this about "god." it is about human psychology.
    Everything not forbidden is compulsory and eveything not compulsory is forbidden. You are free... free to do what the government says you can do.
  • pandorapandora Posts: 21,855
    The worse judgment of all is to withhold love...
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