Any spare good thoughts...

12467

Comments

  • Who Princess
    Who Princess out here in the fields Posts: 7,305
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    I've spent the whole day going between staying strong and then just falling apart and weeping :( I fucking hate this.
    I call this the Patsy Cline stage: "I Fall to Pieces." ;)

    It's been said before but cry all you need to. It may come over you in waves of sadness. It feels horrible but there's no point in fighting it. It will pass. Keep on doing what you can to take care of yourself, getting rest, eating regularly, talking to people that care, and that will help you maintain your strength.
    "The stars are all connected to the brain."
  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    Joe yeah, sadly I've had too much experience with doctors that are totally clueless. I guess I had hoped since she was in such critical condition I wouldn't have to battle as hard. Never ends I guess.
    whoprincess wrote:
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    I've spent the whole day going between staying strong and then just falling apart and weeping :( I fucking hate this.
    I call this the Patsy Cline stage: "I Fall to Pieces." ;)

    It's been said before but cry all you need to. It may come over you in waves of sadness. It feels horrible but there's no point in fighting it. It will pass. Keep on doing what you can to take care of yourself, getting rest, eating regularly, talking to people that care, and that will help you maintain your strength.

    Yeah I just let it happen as it goes, worse to fight it. I'm at work this morning just doing odd and ends stuff. It actually feels nice I guess because it's "normal"? I'm craving anything routine at this point, whatever feels like life before all this went down. I'm very lucky my boss is understanding, having time off to just take care of myself too has been key.

    Thanks for the support everyone, it helps.
  • Dru_Cortez
    Dru_Cortez Posts: 953
    Heartfelt thoughts
    + quiet prayers
    to you + your mother
    during a difficult time.
    Have faith + take care.
    Cheers.
    'Cause you don't give blood and take it back again.
  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    Dru_Cortez wrote:
    Heartfelt thoughts
    + quiet prayers
    to you + your mother
    during a difficult time.
    Have faith + take care.
    Cheers.
    Thank you!

    And can I just say how fucking annoying it is to have family on the other side of the country doing armchair quarterbacking telling you how to handle doctors and social workers? Like dude, this is NOT my first time at this rodeo, sadly. And if you're really *so* worried and want to help....buy a fucking plane ticket. Otherwise, shut. the. fuck. up.

    </end rant> :cry:
  • ShimmyMommy
    ShimmyMommy Posts: 7,505
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    And can I just say how fucking annoying it is to have family on the other side of the country doing armchair quarterbacking telling you how to handle doctors and social workers? Like dude, this is NOT my first time at this rodeo, sadly. And if you're really *so* worried and want to help....buy a fucking plane ticket. Otherwise, shut. the. fuck. up.

    </end rant> :cry:

    +1 for you
    Lots of love, light and hugs to you all!
  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    ShimmyMommy wrote:
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    And can I just say how fucking annoying it is to have family on the other side of the country doing armchair quarterbacking telling you how to handle doctors and social workers? Like dude, this is NOT my first time at this rodeo, sadly. And if you're really *so* worried and want to help....buy a fucking plane ticket. Otherwise, shut. the. fuck. up.

    </end rant> :cry:

    +1 for you
    Thanks. Yeah I wrote and let him have it basically....not biting my tongue, that's energy better spent elsewhere!
  • decides2dream
    decides2dream Posts: 14,977
    chiqui....thinking of you, your mom, your family...and hoping life is treating you all with kindness and love....
    Stay with me...
    Let's just breathe...


    I am myself like you somehow


  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    decides2dream wrote:
    chiqui....thinking of you, your mom, your family...and hoping life is treating you all with kindness and love....
    Thanks dear, we can feel the good thoughts coming our way and they help :) Mom is doing a little better, she's managed to breathe with some assistance from the ventilator for the past 3 days so that's a great sign, and she's completely off the sedation. Hoping things keep going in a positive direction!
  • Fifthelement
    Fifthelement Lotusland Posts: 6,965
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    decides2dream wrote:
    chiqui....thinking of you, your mom, your family...and hoping life is treating you all with kindness and love....
    Thanks dear, we can feel the good thoughts coming our way and they help :) Mom is doing a little better, she's managed to breathe with some assistance from the ventilator for the past 3 days so that's a great sign, and she's completely off the sedation. Hoping things keep going in a positive direction!

    That's great news chiqui. Still sending good thoughts and healing vibes :)
    "What the CANUCK happened?!? - Esquimalt Barber Shop
  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    Fifthelement wrote:
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    decides2dream wrote:
    chiqui....thinking of you, your mom, your family...and hoping life is treating you all with kindness and love....
    Thanks dear, we can feel the good thoughts coming our way and they help :) Mom is doing a little better, she's managed to breathe with some assistance from the ventilator for the past 3 days so that's a great sign, and she's completely off the sedation. Hoping things keep going in a positive direction!

    That's great news chiqui. Still sending good thoughts and healing vibes :)
    Thank you dear! She's having a rough morning so far, they may need to adjust her meds to keep her calm, but hopefully she'll keep doing well with breathing on her own :)
  • Lizard
    Lizard So Cal Posts: 12,091
    Big hugs to you and your whole family, Chiqui.
    and of course, good vibes and prayers.
    So I'll just lie down and wait for the dream
    Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    Lizard wrote:
    Big hugs to you and your whole family, Chiqui.
    and of course, good vibes and prayers.
    Thank you :) I'm so grateful to everyone that has been so supportive. Of course one finds out who your real friends are, some definitely have dropped the ball with me...but I guess that always happens with a crisis.
  • Fifthelement
    Fifthelement Lotusland Posts: 6,965
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    Lizard wrote:
    Big hugs to you and your whole family, Chiqui.
    and of course, good vibes and prayers.
    Thank you :) I'm so grateful to everyone that has been so supportive. Of course one finds out who your real friends are, some definitely have dropped the ball with me...but I guess that always happens with a crisis.

    That's sad. Try to be forgiving though, they may be having troubles of their own (or they could just be assholes ;) ). Regardless, it's burden you don't need to carry at the moment. Be thankful for the ones that have been there for you and keep carrying on my friend. (((hugs)))
    "What the CANUCK happened?!? - Esquimalt Barber Shop
  • ShimmyMommy
    ShimmyMommy Posts: 7,505
    Sending more healing energy to your mom. Stay strong!
    Lots of love, light and hugs to you all!
  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    Fifthelement wrote:
    That's sad. Try to be forgiving though, they may be having troubles of their own (or they could just be assholes ;) ). Regardless, it's burden you don't need to carry at the moment. Be thankful for the ones that have been there for you and keep carrying on my friend. (((hugs)))
    Yeah I'm trying to not let it bother me, it's drawing energy that I need for other things. It's just disappointing. But I guess it's a blessing in its own way in that it confirms who I can count on! I am so thankful for those who are behind me :)
  • ShimmyMommy
    ShimmyMommy Posts: 7,505
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    Fifthelement wrote:
    That's sad. Try to be forgiving though, they may be having troubles of their own (or they could just be assholes ;) ). Regardless, it's burden you don't need to carry at the moment. Be thankful for the ones that have been there for you and keep carrying on my friend. (((hugs)))
    Yeah I'm trying to not let it bother me, it's drawing energy that I need for other things. It's just disappointing. But I guess it's a blessing in its own way in that it confirms who I can count on! I am so thankful for those who are behind me :)

    +1 for recognizing it. Not easy to do during tough times. 8-)
    Lots of love, light and hugs to you all!
  • JOEJOEJOE
    JOEJOEJOE Posts: 10,838
    I wish you peace and strength in dealing with your mom.
  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    Thanks Shimmy. Yeah it's hard not to take it personal, but I'll just let it be for now. If it comes up though I'll let them know how I feel.

    And thanks Joe, same back to you for everything you are going through with your dad. How is he doing? I hope he is as comfortable as he can be and not in any pain.
  • Who Princess
    Who Princess out here in the fields Posts: 7,305
    ShimmyMommy wrote:
    chiquimonkey wrote:
    Fifthelement wrote:
    That's sad. Try to be forgiving though, they may be having troubles of their own (or they could just be assholes ;) ). Regardless, it's burden you don't need to carry at the moment. Be thankful for the ones that have been there for you and keep carrying on my friend. (((hugs)))
    Yeah I'm trying to not let it bother me, it's drawing energy that I need for other things. It's just disappointing. But I guess it's a blessing in its own way in that it confirms who I can count on! I am so thankful for those who are behind me :)

    +1 for recognizing it. Not easy to do during tough times. 8-)
    You do learn a lot about other people (and yourself too) during tough times. Your friends will be there for you if they can and to the extent they can.
    "The stars are all connected to the brain."
  • chiquimonkey
    chiquimonkey Posts: 9,337
    whoprincess wrote:
    You do learn a lot about other people (and yourself too) during tough times. Your friends will be there for you if they can and to the extent they can.
    That's very true, on all counts! I know some of my friends have no idea how to help, and there really isn't anything they can actively do, which is totally cool. It's the ones that know what's up and either have dropped off the radar completely or have been insensitive and been bad listeners. Oh well, what can one do!

Categories